HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Seaforth News, 1946-10-10, Page 2JUST IN FUN )l
Landmark
An elderly man standing in a
queue felt someone nudge him on
the back. Turning sharply he saw
a youth about to leave the place
behind him.
"I'm going across the road to
buy some cigarettes," said the
youth.
"That's no reason why you
should bump me on the back." re-
torted the elderly gentleman.
"I didn't bump you on the
back," the young man said, just as
indignantly, "I just put a chalk
mark on your coat so that,I should
not forget my place in the queue."
Great Speech
For the first time in his life he
had been asked to make an after-
dinner speech. and for days before i
the function he rehearsed his ora-
tion before his wife.
Finally the great day arrived,
and on his return home his proud
wife enquired how the speech had
been received
In Style
Mrs. Style: "I want a hat, but
ft must be in the latest style."
Shopman: "Kindly take a chair,
madam, and wait a few minutes.
The fashion is just changing."
Sentimental
The Scotsman had lost a pound
note. Sadly he entered the adver-
tisement office of the local news-
paper and handed hi the notice he
wanted inserted in the "Lost and
Found" column.
The clerk had difficulty in re -
raining his mirth when he read,
Lost, a one pound note. Sentl-
Mental value."
Just Like That
The inventor of a new type of
hand grenade says: "You merely
press a small projection on the
easing, a detonator explodes the
charge, and there you are." Or
there you aren't, as the case may
be.
Abbreviated
The private had been given the
Job of announcing the guests at a
party at the major's house.
• "Captain Jones, Mrs. Jones and
Miss Jones," he called when they
arrived.
"Shorten your announcements,"
whispered the sergeant. "Captain
Nines and family would have been
sufficient."
The next arrivals were Lieut
Penny and his family.
"FonrpenceI" announced Sae
)private.
Pat Wine
Three tramps had boiled a
chicken and were arguing how to
divide it; One suggested they
should toss a coin. "Head," called
Rem. "Tail," called Tom. "I'll
take what's left," said Pat.
Quick Sale
In the lounge of a large hotel
much patronized by black market
merchants. two doctors were com-
paring notes. One remarked to the
other, "I've got a great many cases
of hysteria."
A man leaned across and said.
"I'$1 take the lot, mister."
Inexperienced
Police Judge: "Well. Sam, about
your son stealing those chicken.
've decided to let him off this
time, but why don't you show him
the right way?"
Sam: "Ah done tried hard Judge
but he goes and gets hisself caught
anyhow."
A Reminder
An absent minded man called
upon his friend, the family doctor,
After chatting for a couple of
hours, the doctor saw him to the
door and, as he was shaking hands,
said: "Come again soon, old chap.
family all well, I suppose?"
"Good heavens!" exclaimed his
visitor. "That reminds me.. My
wife's in a fit!"
Cheap
A doctor was knocked up in a
small village at about 3 a.m. by a
man who asked him to come out
immediately to a place ten miles
away. The doctor dressed quickly
and got out his car. and they drove
furiously to their destination.
Upon arrive the man asked:
"What is your fee, doctors"
"Half a guinea," he replied, in
some surprise
"Here it is then," said the man
banding over the money, "and
cheap, too. The garage man
wanted thirty hob lo drive me
over."
Comfortable Misery
It may be true, as some cheer-
ful philosophers tell us, that money
does not bring happiness, but it
does help one to be 'miserable in
comfort.
'NO SAFETY, NO SCHOOL' SAY THEIR M.OTI-jERS
Irate, mothers in Tormey, Calif., are keeping 14 school children out "on strike" and have issued a
"No Cop, No Kids" ultimatum to county officials. The mother - sponsored strike was called because
no crossing guard had been sent to Tormey to escort children across hazardous highway.
HIGH — AND ALMOST DRY — ON A SAND BAR
osisieza
A drama of the sea is told graphically in this remarkable closeup of a grounded ship and the sand
bar that stopped her. The vessel is the liberty ship Helena Modjeske, which grounded on the Goodwin.
en the English coast. This inglorious end of hit ship's voyage prompted the Modjeska's skipper to
shoot himself when he went ashore.
f
VOICE
OF THE PRESS
Realigned Priority
You'd never recognize them now,
but we remember when Supply was
the big fellow in the old-time eco-
nomic sketch, Supply and Demand.
—Winnipeg Tribune.
Definition
A pedestrian is a married man
who owns one auto. — Chatham
News.
Veterans' Last Chance
Some War Veterans are asking
with reason: "Have l helped to
win a war and lost a chance -= a
chance to earn a living and stake
a home; to get an education and
build up a business? — Hamilton
Spectator.
Few Luxuries
For every five shillings of im-
ported goods, Great Britain today
shows four shillings of exports.
Only sixpence in every' pound of
imports is spent for such "luxur-
ies" aseclothes, films, and so forth,
the remaining 10 shillings and six-
pence being expended for, raw
materials, food and industrial equip-
ment.—Galt Reporter,
They Don't Agree
A Iot of well-intentioned people,
who feel sorry for the poor German
prisoners of war, are urging their
speedy return to Germany. Mean-
while large numbers of said prison-
ers are doing all they can to stay
away from Germany.— Woodstock
Sentinel -Review.
Don't Even Look
An American eye -specialist
blames fifteen per cent of highway
accidents on faulty vision. And
hots many of the remainder arc
simply not looking where they are
going?—Peterborough Examiner.
It's Always Tomorrow
Some speaker should come along
any day to tell its what became of
that bright new tomorrow we were
told so much about yesterday. --
Brendon Snit
Spare Time Job
If a person learned the names 01
2+5 new insects each day, it would
take hint more than 00- years to
memorize all of those which scien-
tists have described ani! catalogued
—St. Thomas Times -Journal.
11
Definitely A Chore
"The technique of sanitary dish-
washing is, being studied and tested
at the University of Michigan," re-
marks The Windsor Star, "but it
is too early to know whether it
will emerge as an art or a science,"
The safest opinion would be, "as a
chore."—Brantford Expositor.
Harder Still
Those who say starlings are
the hardest birds to catch can nev-
er have tried their hands on the
dove of peace.—Toronto Star,
Cheerful Thought
Hvcrything: has it emu pcnsa-
tions, You can't buy soap chips,
but neither can you get new shirts
to wash, --Edmonton Jawn a1.
Free Air
The bicycle was invented by a
Scotsman 100 years ago this sum-
mer. The earlier tires were of solid
rubber. But being a Scot Ile de-
vised the more economical pneu•
vatic tire, which. is merely a thin
skin of rubber, stuffed with thin
air. And the air is frese.—Ottawa
Citizen,
REG.'LAR FELLERS—The Quiz Kids
I'M SURPRISED
AT YOU, PINHEAD,
AitiY TWO YEAR?QLD
IWGWS WS ANSWERS
fl 5THOSE''
` ,QUESTIONSr
TABLE TALKS
Autumn Suppers
1
After a hard day's work, wheth•
er in the field. factory, office or
home, appetites are usually pretty
keen, especially with cooler <even-
ings to help put an edge on them.
The young fry don't have to he
given a second cab to supper as a
rule these dayseither.
There are still many deliclo;,s
desserts using late , fruits such a,
cobblers or cottage puddings made
by topping fruit with slightly
sweetened tea biscuit dough, or
plain cake batter, baking and serv-
ing with a ` fruit sauce. Baked:
Brown Betties made with alter-
nate layers of fruit and: fine dry
bread crumbs mixed with a litt'e
melted fat and sugar are always
popular favorites.
Tb< home economists of.the Do-
minion Department of Agricat-
ture's Consumer Section, offer re-
cipes today which will provide
' either hearty main courses. or, as
in the case of the Cucumber Soup,
with the addition of a good salad
and dessert, will round out a sub•
etantial supper menu. The two
cucumber recipes also take advan-
tage of those large or partly ripe
cucumbers which may be hard to
use up.
Corn Potato Scallop
4 cups slice:. raw potato (cut in
34 inch slices)
2 cups corn cut from the cob
(raw or cook,'d)
OR drained canned corn
6 tablespoons chopped green or
sweet red pepper
OR pimento
j{ cup chopped onion
2 tablespoons flour
Salt and pepper to taste
1 cup milk
34 cup grated cheese.
Place a layer of sliced potato in
greased casserole, add a layer of
chopped pepper and onion. sprin-
kle with salt, pepper and flavor.
Repeat layers until all vegetables
are used. Pour milk into casserole
and bake covered in a moderate
oven, 350 deg. F., for 1 hour. Re-
move cover, sprinkle the top with
grated cheese, and return to oven
for 10 minutes, or until cheese ss
melted and top browned slightly.
Stuffed Cucumbers
6 medium cucumbers
1 cup sausage meat
4 cup finely chopped cele -y
leaves
teaspoon salt
34 teaspoon sage
1 cup soft stale bread crumba
Cut cucumbers in half length•
Strike Affects
Whole Nation
Strike Halts Production At Soda
Ash Plant With Far Reaching
Results
It's quite possible that you've
never heard of soda ash. Until
quite recently it did not figure very
much in the news. But whether
you know it or not, it affects al-
most every phase of your daily life,
says the Sarnia Canadian Observer.
Soda ash is an industrial neces-
sity. It is produced at only one
factory in Canada — a compara-
tively small chemical plant at Am-
herstburg. The employees number
only four hundred, but they happen
to be on strike, The result is this
The big paper mills are worried
over the possibility of cutting pro-
duction, even making temporary
layoffs, because they are running
short of soda ash.
The production ,of aluminum,
from which so many household
utensils are made, is being cut ap-
preciably for want of soda ash.
Bottle manufacturers and users
are making frantic appeals to the
public to conserve bottles. The
dairy industry, according to the
president of the National Dairy
Council, can only function normally
for a short time more unless house-
wives return every possible bottle.
All this for want of soda ash
And if' the Amherstburg strike
were settled today, it would take
nearly two months to get glass -
making furnaces back to the re-
quired 2,700 -degree temperature.
wise, remove seeds and soft pot -
tion with a spoon. Cook cucum-
bers in boiling sashed water for 5
minutes. Drain well. Cook sausage
meat, add seasonings and crumbs
and mix well together. Pile stuf-
fing in cucumber shells. Place in a
greased baking dish and bake in a
hot oven, 400 deg. F., for 25 min-
utes, or until cucumbers are ten-
der. Six servings,
Cucumber Soup
2 tablespoons minced onion
2 'tablespoons mild flavored fat
3 cups diced cucumbers
1% cups tomato
l/ teaspoon salt
2% cups thin cream aauce
fiiown the onior in the fat. Add
cucumbers, tomatoes and salt,
Cook gently until cucumbers are
tender. Then press through a
sieve and add to the hot cream
sauce. Serve piping hot witkj•
toasted bread crumbs.
IT. MEANS A LOT wlien
the meal includes Maxwell'
House. This marvellous•
coffee is extra delicious
because it contains choice
Latin-American coffees .. ;.
the finest the world pro..
duces.
Yen Will Enjoy Staying At
The SL Regis Hotel
TORONTO
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Double, $3.50 up
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QUESTIONS ON THIS
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