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The Seaforth News, 1960-09-22, Page 7Lived — A Phony tut Died Gamely The dream world of Stanley Clifford Weyman started taking its ghostly shape 67 years ago in Brooklyn. He was born them cgs Stephen Weinberg and grew into a short, thin, dark-haired man who convinced a great many people, including a U.S. President, that he was some- body else — a variety of some 'bodies else, in tract, and all of them important, In the simpler years before World War I, he impressed per - eons great and small with gold- braiclect uniforms, which on one occasion won him a 21 -gun sa- lute from a warship. Later, in a world impressed with its so- phistication, he discovered that a white coat miraculously made him a man of science. Weyman was barely 17 whet/ he posed as an attache of the Serbian Embassy in Washington and as a naval lieutenant. At 22, he donned a naval uniform again ancl, introducing hit -Iseult as Lt. Comdr, Ethan Allen Wein- berg on special orders from the Secretary of Navy, inspected the battleship Wyoming in the Hud - bon River. In slill more Graue- tarkian guise, tie bogus consul general of stRumania, he told of taking a chief oofate's salute of 21 big guns, Weyman saved what, was probably his finest exploit until 1921, when he found Princess Fatima, Sultana of Afghanistan, languishing in a New York City hotel, neglected by U.S. officials, He introduced himself as Under Secretary of State Sterling Wy- man, took her on a bauble -buy- ing tour of Tiflany's (with her own money), and escorted her to Washington two days later. There, again wearing a naval lieutenant commander's shoulder boards along with an admiral's cap, he was photographed with President Harding and the Sul- tana at the White House. Dur- ing the visit, Weyman pumped the President's hand and drew hint aside to tell him a joke, No- body ever brought charges against him for the impersona- tion, But he got a prison term— one of his very few — for beat- ing a Brooklyn tailor out of the price of a uniform. When Pola Negri carne to New York in 1926 for the fun- eral of her friend, Rudolph Val- entino, Weyman was well into his white -coat phase. He con- vinced the police that he was t)tg aetregs' physician and, untl•,1 Valentino's manager intervened, bad actual charge of the actor's funeral arrangements. If he rarely went to jail, Weyman rarely profited from his fantasies. Between charades he usually retreated to his Brooklyn apartment and took obscure clerical jobs. During World War II, though, Weyman turned his medical pose to some account: He ran an academy that tutored reluctant patriots in the gat of avoiding the draft (by faking deafness, stupidity, etc.) Weyman went to jail for that stunt. When he emerged in 1948, he sank again into Brooklyn qui- etude, emerging only for small postures as a U.N, press repre- sentative, and borrower on a non - existent home. A month ago, he landed an honest job as night manager of a motel in Yonkers, just up the line from New York. And there last week, without gold braid or white coat, Weyman played his finest scene. As police reconstructed it. a young man walked into the motel lobby, pulled a pistol, and demanded the receipts. Weyman resisted. He was shot three times. When others reached the lobby, the bandit was gone and so were the receipts, all $200 of them, Stanley Clifford Weyman, fallen heroically to the floor — for once in the role of himself — was dreaming his last. The timber wolf is also called the gray wolf, but its pelage is not always gray. It varies from brownish -gray to a creamy -white to almost pure black. MAKING A BIG SPLASH — Sgt. Jack Glydon, NCO in charge of the para -rescue section hits the cold waters of Lake Ontario during practice for the Canadian International Air Show. How Twisted Minds Get A Big Laugh An undertaker rang the hell of a house in Broadstairs. "I've eome to perform my sad duty in accordance with your instruc- tions," he said to the man who opened the door, Mr. Love, the householder, was obviously puzzled. "What instructions? I haven't given any." It was the undertaker's turn to look surprised, "But, sir," he protested. "I received a letter Prom you saying that your little 1 child had died, and that you wished me to come and measure him for the coffin" Mr. Love gave a shout of an- ger. "This is insufferable," he snapped. "My child is seriously ill, but he is certainly not dead. Somebody — some cruel scoun- drel—has played a terrible joke." Shaking his head in bewilder- ment, the undertaker left. A few minutes later the bell rang again. This time a photographer stood on the doorstep. "Mr. :cove?" he inquired in hushed tones. "Is it convenient for me to take a picture of your dead child now?" At that Mr. Love nearly broke down. Who was responsible for these two macabre hoaxes? lie wondered. Who had got such a i grudge against him? Poor 'Mr. Love soon became quite used to tradesmen bring- ing all sorts of goods to his house, which they swore he had ordered. Fowls, game, fish — es- pecially fish — every variety from soles to smelts. His life became 0 misery. That happened some years ago; but there have been hoaxes just as cruel since. Death — and all the melan- choly preludes to burial—seems to obsess people who plan an- noyance to others. 11 exerts a morbid fascination, In Kentish Town not long ago a man called at an undertaker's office. "MY neighbour has died." he said. "Phease go round to (hie address." The other did so, 13ut there was no dead neighbour. "You must mean niy husband!" ex- claimed the woman who answer- ed the cloor. "He's alive as you are." One day, recently, in the same district, it was raining heavily and a transport hire firm re- ceived a telephone message: "My lorry's broken down," said the caller, "I must have one first thing in the morning for deliv- eries," He gave the name and address of a well-known trades - Although it meant a Int of in - MERMAIDS IN ROME — Ingred Kramer, top diver from Germetey, relaxes with Nina Krustova from the U,S,S,R, convenience, the firm obliged. "You've been fooled," asserted the tradesman when the lorry arrived, "I don't want a lorry. Never use them. I don't even make deliveries!" A man wrote to a coach firm on a film company's notepaper. "We require enough coaches to take a hundred and twenty-five actors to Ambridge, Warwick- shire, for sequences we are shooting there," he said. The coach proprietor studied le map to discover the best route to Ambridge, but couldn't find the place, so he rang the A.A, They couldn't help. "The only Ambridge we've heard of is in the radio programme, 'The Archers,'" They told him. Baffled, the coach man dialled the number given on the letter - heading. "This is Bow Street police station," came the reply. He knew, then, that he'd been taken for a ride. Funny? Only it you appreciate humour which causes endless trouble and worry to others. But almost everybody will smile at this one. A man had just had a tele- phone installed. The bell rang. "This is the G.P.O., and I am the chief engineer," announced the caller. "We are checking your new 'phone, Please repeat after me — 'One — two — three Poore " The man did. "Now," continu- ed the voice, "say: Hickory, dickory dock. The house ran up the clock.'" Again the man obliged. Then he was asked to recite four more nursery rhymes, and he did this patiently before he real- ized that he was being well and truly fooled! In Paterson, North Jersey, a family had a coffin, which the, hadn't ordered, delivered to their house. The hoaxer didn't stop at that. For weeks the un- fortunate victims of his malice were disturbed at almost every hour of the day and night. Taxis arrived, and so did vans, even barrels of beer. One of the cruellest hoaxes was at Dowlais, near Merthyr Tydfil. The "joker" rang a big store in Dowlais, and told telae manager that three men whose addresses he gave had been kill- ed in an explosion at a steel- works in Ebbw Vale, some eight miles away. "Can you let their wives know? I have been un- able to contact the local police," explained the caller. The sad message was convey- ed to the three women, The re- sults were heart-rending. One women and both her young daughters fainted at the terrible news. Another wife, who had just returned from taking one of her children to hospital, also feinted, The third had recently been discharged from hospital. The shock was too much for her too. She collapsed, and it was some time before she came round. All because of a particu- larly vile and malicious hoax, Unfortunately, t h o wicked person responsible for causing such grief and blurry was neve] traced. Lastly, an innocent hoax, one which may have caused exas- peration, but no real harm, Thie was perpetrated at Brighton in 1804, It was announced that et a certain time in the evening man would wallc across the waves, Naturally, this gave rise to great excitement and specu- latlOn. The elites and the sands were: crowded with people eagerly waiting for the miracle to hate port, But, of coulee, it never did. They stayed there fur hour after hour, reluctant to miss such an amazing speetaele. 'Then at long last, realizing they had been duped, they repaired to the La- verns to wash away their dis• appointment. But not only the boaxer got a kick out of that bit of work. "For a moment it relieved the dullness of the place," said o London newspaper. Too Much Fuss Over Little -Leaguers ? The Little League World St' ries, drawing youngsters from all over the world to Williams- port each summer, is a brilliant spectacle. Almost every boy who participates in the Series relishes the experience — living in a Ly - coming College dorm, playing before noisy capacity crowds, signing autographs for starry- eyed fans. But all the fuss and furor over the sub -teen-agers — with the adult -imposed emphasis on victory and hero-worship .--- raise a pressing question: Does success spoil Little Leaguers? "No," say the men who run the international Little League pro. gram, "We teach the boys the value of sportsmanship, the im- portance of competition," "Yes," says Joey Jay, the Mil- waukee Brave pitcher, who was the first Little Leaguer ever to become a big leaguer. "I've known a lot of kids who were treated like little heroes. After- ward, they expected everything to be handed them on a silver platter — and it wasn't. They couldn't adjust." Beyond any doubt, the boys in Williamsport last month were treated as little heroes, especial- ly the Levittown, Pa., players, who beat Fort Worth, 5-0, in the final (as Joe Mormello pitched a no-hitter and struck out sixteen Texas batters). "This is a dream," said infielder Julian Kalkstein. "I wonder when I'm gonna wake up," said catcher Brian Penington, "If it's like this all my life," insisted Rollie Clark, a 4 -foot 6, 80 -pound second baseman. "I never want to wake up." What A Single Vote Can Mean It is almost unbelievable th,lt in this democracy there are li- terally millions of citizens who a r e disfranchised — voteless. The amazing thing is that it is voluntary. These millions just don't bother to register and vote. The chief alibi, which no per- son who can add one and one should be guilty of, is that "my single vote won't make any dif- ference." Oh yeah? Harry Truman carried Cali- fornia and Ohio in 1948 by less than one vote per precinct, and without those states he would not have won the election. An infinitesimal majority of 87 votes sent Lyndon Johnson to the Senate the same year. There are plenty of other ex- amples. But if one is not inter- ested in voting, a bunch of fig- ures doesn't mean hitch. Nei- ther, presumably, does the fu- ture of the country. The fact is, not voting is in itself a form of voting. -_. Star Journal (Pueblo: Colo.) CLASSIFIED AI/EMMA BABY CHICKS STARTED chicks, prompt rv~-shipment also 14.10 week pullets, Doyolds, dual purpose specialty egg producers, to order. Book December -January broilers now. Contact Ideal agent, or write Bray Hatchery, 120 John North, Hamilton, Ont. FARMS FOR SALE 2 FARMS, adjoining, both with heaso and barns, 1 with silo, Well watered; 83 and 60 acres. S mile south Roslin, Highway 37, Will sell with or without crops machinery, largo flock sheep. Excellent dee loam. E. M. LESLIE, PLAINFIELD FOR SALE — MISCELLANEOUS INSTRUCTIONS for making. Yule logs, white liniment, lee -less Ice, $1 postpaid, Gerald Buell, 624 Lorne Street, New Glasgow, N.S. "DESTROYER" for use in outdoor tot. lets, Eats down to the earth, saves cleaning. Directions. Thousands of users, coast to coast. Price 51.00 per can, postpaid. Log Cabin Products, 322 York Road, Guelph, Ontario. CARROT JUiCE EXTRACTORS ELECTRIC stainless steel construction, (capacity fl fun quarts before empty- ing basketh. For full information write Health For A11. Box 133 Station 0., Toronto 12, or phone HU. 5-7150. EVERY boy should have Sonny Roy Harmonica, lovely tone, easy to learn $1.00. Buffalo Bill bull whip, hand braided by Cherokee Indians, genuine cowhide $0.85. Allied Import Agency; Box 388, Station H, Montreal, WANT TO BE DIFFERENT? Send us navies and addresses of your friends (clearly printed) and surprise them at Christmas, Buy then the most These al modern a3-lineatprinters, with name, address and city, imprint per-- sons! er"sons! possessions, books, stationery, cheques, Christmas cards .- a million uses. Complete with automatic inker and attractive pocket size case. $1.50 value, now only 51.00 each, postpaid. Order today! Sfamperaft, 81 Peter St„ Toronto 2B MEDICAL TRY ITt :VERY SUFFERER OF RHEUMATIC PAINS OR NEURITIS SHOULD TRY DIXON'S REMEDY. MUNRO'S DRUG STORE 335 ELGIN OTTAWA $1.25 Express Collect. POST'S ECZEMA SALVE BANISH the tormentof dry eczema rashes and weeping akin. troubles, Post's Eczema Salve will not disappoint you, itching scalding and burning exze- ma, acne, ringworm pimples and foot eczema will respond readily to the stainless odorless ointment, regardless of how stubborn or hopeless they scan. Bent PPRICost $3.50 PERipJAR e on of Pric POST'S REMEDIES 1845 St. Clair Avenue 15aef, TORONTO MISCELLANEOUS NOVELTIES, HIT -SALES Y00) can find all new products in the Informative paper "laxBort-Import/2'h0 Bridge to the World" In German and English languages. Trial subscription $l. Max Schimmel Verlag, Wuerzburg E, Germany. Representative wanted, How Can t ? by Roberta Lee Q. How can I most easily re- move cat and dog hairs from upholstered furniture or cal' seats? A. Simply by wiping lightly over them with a board which has been wrapped with adhesive tape, sticky side out. Q, How can I eliminate the nuisance of sparrows' nesting under the eaves of my house? A. Fill small cheesecloth bags with camphor balls and hang them from the eaves. Those dis- gusted sparrows will set up housekeeping elsewhere. A sense of humor is whet makes you laugh at something that would make you mad it it happened to you. MONEY TO LOAN WE have money available fol first :nti Second mortgage lawns on farm and town property, current rates al.lnter- est. Peyntents arranged to suit your income. Jo Martie Ltd., striker, 2 Wel. lesley St. W.. Toronto -- Box 244. Sud- bury. NUTRIA WILL NUTRIA BE YOUR FUTURE? All the signs point to a bright and brit. llant market for this luxury fur. But success will come only through proper breeding methods, quality foundation Mock, pias a program based on sound business methods. We offer all of this to you as a rancher. usingour exclu- sive breeders plan. Speeal offer tt- those who qualify, "elm your netrla under our co•operotire ranchers' plan". Write: Canadian Nutria Ltd. R.R. 1.. Richmond 11111, Ontarie, OPPORTUNITIESFOR MEN AND WOMEN BE A HAIRDRESSER JOIN CANADA'S LEADING SCHOOL Great Opportunity Learn Hairdressing Pleasant dignified profession; pont wages. 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Armco and Ektaehrome 35 m.m. 20 ex- posures mounted to slides $1.20, Color prints no undeifrn full for unpr324 inted d negative" POULTRY LEGHORN pullets, Mt. Hope and Ghost. leys ready to lay and laying. 2oha. Stutzman, Mt. Elgin, Ont. WANTED: Floekowners to supply or with hatching eggs. All breeds requir- ed. Eggs taken on some breeds every week in the year, We pay up to 35e per dozen more than market price for 5001 hatching. eggs. For full details, write Box No. 219, 123 Eighteenth St., eIew Toronto. RASPBERRY PLANTS Raspberries. Latham $4,50, Madawaska. 55.50 — 100, 033.00 1900, $45.00 -- 1,000 guaranteed. Percy Simonds, Elora. Ont, ATTENTION! SUFFERERS from Arthritic, Rheumatic, Neuritis, Sciatica, Lumbago, and aches, and pains from overexertion end fa- tigue. British medical research chem- ists have developed PAINADE which brings prompt temporary relief for the above named conditions. PAINADE contains no narcotics, is non -habit forming a n d harmless. PAINADE must bring prompt relief first bottle or money returned in full. Formulae on every bottle containing 100 Tablets. special introductory price is $2.50 casts or money order postpaid anywhere in Canada. Special price spplys only to orders from this ad. PAINADE Sole distributors United States and Canada P.O. BOX 8245 ORLANDO, FLORIDA, U.S.A. ISSUE 38 — 10611 WATER SPRAYING FROM HIS FEET, Sgt. Jack Glydon of Kipling, Soak., is lifted from the water by a holst-etluipped H34 Helicopter, One mon dinghy from parachutist's seal pack will be retrieved by RCAF rescue launch.