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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Seaforth News, 1959-11-12, Page 6"Dear Anne Hirst; I am a miserable creature, although I have a husband and two fine babies, All around me I see mar- rued couples se happy together -- but my husband is more like a brother to me, and I donot believe I can stand it any longer It is my own fault. I mar- ried in my early teens only be- cause all my friends Were en, gaged or had husbands, and I just made up my mind I wouldn't be left out. I looked around and I selected a man like I'd get a ' good coat; I hoped he would wear well. "He has. He is good to me and the children, and I have stayed on hoping 1 could learn to love him. I haven't, and my heart is still without love. I have no other reason to leave him, but I an beginning to think I am do- ing us both an injustice by liv- ing this way. ' I have missed something really essential to a happy., life, and I am getting more and more dissatisfied, "Am I doomed to live on and on without ever knowing the thrills of love? I will be grateful for your opinion. , . Your col- umn helped me a lot in other things. MISERABLE" FUTILE HOPE * You are the victim of your * own folly, and I am sorry Thr * you, I cannot hold out any hope * for a different future unless * you change your desires, You * took on your role deliberate- * ly and you are duty bound to " play it through, to be the best * wife you can to the manwho o loves you so much, and to raise * the children who look to you " both for love and guidance. • Can you picture what would ' happen if you left your hus- band, took the children and went your own way? A more ' hazardous ambition I cannot imagine. What if you did not " find love? Now you are at least " spared the frustration that ' would follow; you have no idea of the disillusion that would mean, nor how passion- " ately you would wish you had " stayed home where you belong. * Compared with other mar- * riages, your own is not un- * endurable. Your husband is a happy man, well satisfied with • his wife and his family. Un- * less and until he misses what * you have not been able to give, ' why not live one day at a * time? His well-being and the • comfort you find in your chil- e dren can mitigate in a large * measure this discontent that • is draining your energies. Love Extra -Easy to Sew PRINTED PATTERN 4912 SIZES 10-18 Just THREE main pattern parts — cut out and stitch up this basic beauty in record time. Wear it as a jumper by day, on alluring dress for dates, Choose cotton tweed or benga- line, Printed Pattern 4912: Misses' Sizes 10, 12, 14, 18, 18, Size 10 takes 1's yards 54 -inch fabric. Printed directions on ea ch eattern part. Easier, accurate. Send FIFTY CENTS (504) (stamps cannot be accepted, use postal note for safety) for this pattern. Please print plainly SIZE, NAME, ADDRESS, '16"iS'RLE NUMBER. Send order to ANNE ADAMS, Vox 1, 123 Eighteenth St., New Toronto, Ont. * is, I agree, pee of the essentials * of a completely' happy mar- * riage, but if it is denied one_ * can look abput for compensas * tions and find them, • Your longing is natural, but • it is futile..Far ahead of your * personal happiness stand the • responsibilities you voluntarily • assumed. Reconcile yourself tq * them,.,and set your heart on a * different pinnacle — the con- * tentment of this good husband * you have and the growing sat- * isfaotion you will know in * your children, That aim will * bring a spiritual peace you * have never known. * Going to church regularly * should bring new courage, and * its affairs and those of your * community will keep your * mind in more rewarding than- * nets. ADOLESCENT HUSBAND "Dear Anne Hirst: F o r the first two years of our marriage I was happy with my husband— until I found he is just a simple liar, I believe it is because he is so ignorant, and tries to cover up with inadequate falsehoods. He says nasty things about all my family except my father, whom lie. seem s to respect. Though I was brought up in a Christian home and am still a Sunday School teacher, my char- ity is about exhausted, He gets angry at me for nothing at all, and for days will not speak, I still love him, but if he doesn't stop being so hard to live with I'm afraid there will soon be no love left. "I agree that the man should be the head of his house, but not to the extent that his wife becomes a slave. He is so un- reasonable and unpredictable that I live with nerves that are at the breaking point. I have been a good wife and I am a good mother, but I am just about through , . Can I do anything that I have not? AT THE END" * Why don't you ask your fa- * ther to have a man-to-man * talk with your husband? You * say he knew your family * three years before he married * you, and he must have sensed * their background and their * kindness to one another. I ex- * pect his criticism stems from * the knowledge of his inferi- * ority, but he should at least * be outwardly loyal, You will have to stop being * hurt. You c a n n o t stop his * crude comments, for they * bring him a certain relief, Try * to remember that he doesn't * know. better. He seems not to * have grown up, for to allow * a disagreement to silence him • * for days is childish, To keep * him amiable you may have to * flatter him, and you are smart * enough to find a few reasons * to do that; he must be de- * (erred to in some degree. He resents the consideration and * respect which your church * and your friends show you. * Be grateful that they do, and * overlook his jealousy. * Since he honours your fa- * ther, it may be that the older * man will be able to alter. your * husband's outlook to some ex- * tent. Try' it. 4 * * If you cannot have what you most desire, get the most out of what you have and feel new gratitude for your blessings. Anne Hirst can help you appre- ciate them more fully. Write her at Box 1, 123 Eighteenth St., New Toronto, Ont. "Dad, what's an opportunist?" "He's a man who makes hay with the grass you've let grow under your feet." WHO YOU? — Ready far the worst is this Marine wearing modern, cold - weather battle dress. Ballistic helmet shell, made of the same material used in armored vests, is designed to replace the helmet now in use. Other items are face mask, cold -weather liner and snow glasses, STEP . LIVELY, WALLFLOWER — Sarah Brockett's version of the hat d.ance•may not be authentic. After all, she's from Illinois and a .farm girl to boot. HIiONICLES INGERFARM cvenaot,n.e o aeon Studying a crowd of people is always interesting but I think last Friday I found the most in- triguing group it has been my lot to observe. I went to "Medi - scope" — the display and demon- stration that was put on by the Ontario Medical Association in Toronto. I found it intensely in- teresting and most informative. And the crowds ... the officials themselves were floored by the numbers who turned up to see what they had to offer. And it was all free — you couldn't spend money if you wanted to. It was even hard to find a place to buy a sandwich. Actually there were two small stands but. they weren't very obvious. I watched the people passing mothers 'with babies; high school students; nuns; middle - age folk, singly or in pairs; an occasional onlooker in a wheel- chair and also the very old. What brought them there in such numbers, I wondered? Was it curiosity, a thirst for knowledge or . a genuine desire to know what goes on inside our human body? I have a feeling . it was the latter. Not all displays at- tracted equal attention but I noticed there was always a greater crowd wherever there was any practical' demonstration. For instance , by means of a spe- cial stethoscope you could hear your own . hear beat, or by a contraption over the ears you could test your own hearing ability. There was also a Geiger counter showing its reaction when placed over radio -active and non -radio -active material. For this purpose chunks of rocks were used, one containing a fair amount of uranium ore. There were books showing household equipment for paraplegics . or otherwise disabled persons, One booth demonstrated various types of anaesthetics. I never did get close to either of those two. Of course the great attraction was "The Birth of a Baby". Each time I went past the enclosure there was a terrific line-up and it was not until the third or fourth time I'd decided to take my chance with the rest and wait. But I did not find the wait- ing too tedious because I was so entensely interested in watch- ing others in the queue, Next to me were two ministers, sever- al nuns, an elderly couple and four or five high school students horsing around in the approved fashion — approved, that is, by their own fraternity. I resented their attitude. Here We were, waiting to get in to a demon- stration of the great Miracle of Life and all these young gaffers could do was show unseemingly levity. I had no idea what we were likely to see — that is, the form it would take — but what ever it was I felt it should be given the respect it deserved. Well, I need not have worried. The display was mostly in pic- tures and plastic models, show- ing the growth of a baby from its inception to birth. And do you know, from the minute we entered the small building the young folk were all attention. No talking, no unseemly com- ments of any kind. They were genuinely interested and moved slowly and reluctantly along. Nor was there anything in the exhibit that was unfit for the the youngest child to see. After all the actual birth of young animals is no secret to children on a farm so why should they be denied the knowledge of how the young gradually grow until they are ready to leave the pro- tective shelter of their mother's body. As the youngsters left ithe• building there may have been a few quips realtive to what they. had -seen but we have to remem- ber that young people will dd' or say almost anything to hide their real feelings. Later in my wanderings I heard a lot of talking and thought I must be nearing an- other demonstration so. 'l; kept. going in the direction of the voice. It was anything but a dem= cnstration! found a small booth — or stall — whatever you like to call it, devoted to geriatics — that is, to the care and light work that can be undertaken by the aged — either • in homes for the aged or in pri- vate homes, The talker, how• ever, wasn't the doctor in charge but a garrulous old lady! The poor soul was airing all he: greivances — about doctors, hornet for the aged, the old age pension and how few extras it covered. She had been a practi- cal nurse in her time and thought she should be allowed to help look after the other resid. ents in the home. She resented the fact that she was not allow- ed to bring her two trunks with her. "I'm' sorry," the admittance nurse had said, "no trunks al- lowed. What have you in them, anyway?" "What's in them?" the old lady told her indignantly, "clothes, that's what. I don't see you nurses running around in the nude so why shouldn't l have my clothes? And there's a num- ber of sickroom utensils you could make use of that I'd let you have for free," Well, the poor dear ran on like that at great length. 'I came Ccingdian laid For British Forests . Because far-sighted foresters sent to the United Kingdom shortly after World War I large quantifies of seeds and seedlings of Paelfie coast forest specie:, • a serious wood shortage in Bri- tain is being overcome, In Scotland, plans are going .forward for a pulp mill whose raw materials will be derived largely from coniferous forests resulting from the vigorous young growth which originated in British Columbia, many thou- sands of miles distant. Forests were an important na- tional asset in Britainuntil the Napoleonic wars, but the inven- tion and widespread use of iron ships led to their neglect. For- est productivity, throughout the United Kingdom declined, and the country became increasingly dependent on the Baltic coun- tries, Canada, and other outside sources of supply. World War I emphasized Bri- tain's desperate' need for wood, and the situation was intensi- fied by the casualties suffered by shipping. Many cargo ships 'carrying vitally needed lumber were sunk, and their precious fregiht floated away, or sank to thesteel sea bottom in the hold of ships. Foresters in Britain and over- seas sought to prevent a repeti- tion of this danger by carrying out an extensive tree -planting program in many parts of the British Columbia's coastal aren that would be suitable as the foundation for Britain's post war timber supply. Douglas fir, west- - ern cedar, hemlock. and spruce were planted, and almost invari- ably, the seedlings grew into healthy trees, writes Charles Shaw in The Christian Science Monitor. Today, nearly one-third of the United Kingdom's lumber out- put is 'from trees planted in the form of seed or seedlings 'from the Pacific coast. The trees have grown particularly well in the warmer and wetter parts of Bri- tain, according to Bernard Re/i- dle, one of 40 botanists from overseas who made a tour of Britishcently. Columbia woods re - The British 'government is the largest owner of forestlands in the United Kingdom, says Mr. Rendle, because the industry re- presents a long-term investment — from 30 to 50 years, and the average individual `'or corpora- tion cannot wait that long. In most cases forests have been planted on ground that has proven. unsatisfactory for agri- culture — much of it in the north of England and Scotland. Modern Etiquette by Roberta Lee Q. When one has finished eat- ing cereal, should the spoon be left in the cereal bowl? A. No; place it on the saucer under the bowl. 'Q. Who goes first down the aisle of a motion picture theater, the man or the woman? A. The woman precedes. And unless she is with her husband, fiance or someone she knows back a second time and she was just moving away. As I watched her go I thought — "There, if ever there was• one, goes an un- loved and unwanted -soul." She probably means well but it is • beyond- the human . endurance of relatives to stand such a' gar- rulous tongue.1 also thought, as we .should all think upon such occasions _ "There, but for the grace of ;God, go I." Veal well, she 1110014 turn to 111m and ask, "Is this all right?" This gives him a chance .-. should he be near or farsighteds farther to suggestaway. a seat that is closer or Q: At a small informal: wed- ding, is it all right for the bride and bridegroom to walk down the aisle together? A. Yes, if t h e Wedding is small and the bride has no near Male relative to walk with her. Q. We've been having a little argument as to whose place it is to speak first when"meeting on the street, the, man or the wo- man. Will you please settle this for us? A. Once upon, a time, it was the "lady" who always spoke first. But today, if they are good friends, there's nothing at all wrong with the man's speaking ,first. Q. Should the used silverware be gathered up before removing the plates from the dinner table? A. No; the silver should be lefton the plates, and all re- moved from the table together. Q. 1f a knife has not been used during a meal, should it be pick- ed up at the end of the ineal and placed with the fort[ across the plate so that it will be taken out when the plate is removed? A. No; it should remain where it is on the table. Easy Chili -Chasers P.. r (7400% 91 7' i18ACK�L Be smart! Get set now for frosty days ahead. Tassel -cap for sister — helmet for brother. Easy -knit cap 'n' mitten sets in garter stitch, contrast cable - trim sewn on separately. Pat- ` tern 948: directions to fit 1, 2, 3 year old children included. Send THIRTY = FIVE CENTS (stamps cannot be accepted, use postal note for safety) for this pattern to Laura Wheeler, Box 1, 123 Eighteenth St., New Tor- onto, Ont. Print plainly PAT- TERN NUMBER, your NAMIS and ADDRESS. Send for a copy of 1959 Laura Wheeler Needlecraft Book. It has lovely designs to order: embroidery, crochet knitting, weaving, quilting, toys; In the book, a special surprise to make a little girl happy — a cut-out doll, clothes to colour. Send 25 cents for this book. ISSUE 45 — 1959 ETERNAL CITY — When in Rome, future tourists will be able to walk the streets as they were in ancient times, The city will be a model with streets the size of sidewalks. Here, a woman checks the miniature Colosseum. a