HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Seaforth News, 1957-02-21, Page 3A Nation's Worth
We do not need to pay regard
to what President Nasser thinks
si us, nor indeed do we have to
rare much that it is acclaimed
tibroad by those who seek to pull
as down that British influence in
the world is zero, that we are
!hushed and so on. All that will
shange. It has been like -it be -
tore.
' But what dismays me is the
view, which appears to gain in-
rreasing acceptance by too many
in our own country, that this
low assessment is justified and
that we are in fact a,second-rate
nation. . . My, opinion is • that
quite the contrary is the case,
and that we shall do well to re-
sist this mesmerism with all our
might.
If we review• our achieve-.
ments and our contribution to
world affairs, we are brought, I
believe, to the conclusion that
they entitle us to first-elass
•ranking. In the economic field
our record speaks for itself.
More than one-half of the
world's trade is conducted in our
currency, sterling. The commod-
ity markets, insurance, shipping,
money and exchange markets,
and the international banking'
system are linked together in
the City of London and provide
the most efficient service of its
kind in the world for all to use,
a mechanism, a technique, which
ls unrivalled.
And it is not sustained by
mere wealth. It is based On trust,
mutual confidence, and the
power of good judgment and
sound common sense. It is the
moral worth of a nation which
matters more than anything
else and there is no doubt that
our sense of fair play and inte-
grity of character still form the
true foundation of our entire
social and economic systems.
In engineering, nuclear ener-
gy, aircraft design an& construc-
tion, art, literature, and many
other spheres we more than hold
Our own, but my object is not
just to chalk up our qualities. I
am merely trying, in all modes-
ty, to show that we have much
to offer which the world needs,
if we will only allow our incor-
rigible and superb optimism and
confidence to reassert them-
selves. The tasks ahead are tre-
mendously difficult and they ex-
clude complacency or lethargy,
but, sunk in a bog of self-deprc-
FOR WINNIE - Pictured is a
Tiffany -designed, gold medal-
lion, first award ever made by
the Pilgrims of the U.S., which
was presented to Sir Winston
Churchill. Obverse side (top)
shows a pilgrim, flanked by the
American eagle and British lion.
Reverse side hails Churchill as.
one "who has done more than
any man in history to advance
the unity of the English-speak-
ing peoples".
dation and accepting an unjust
and unfair evaluation of our-
selves, we shall be in grave dan-
ger of losing our resolution and
with it the vision and creative
ideas the hour now demands
from us. -W. Lionel Fraser, from
a letter in The Times (London).
Hanged First,
Married Later
If you visit the Oxfordshire
hamlet of Great Tew they'll tell
you of Mary Smith who,
many
years ago, got marriedthree
days after she'd been hanged for
murder, And they won't be pul-
ling your leg. The story is true.
Mary Smith was just an ordi-
nary country girl. She met a
dashing young man who pro-
posed marriage -and suddenly
disappeared when it became
plain that Mary was going to
have a child.
Overcome by shame, the dis-
tracted mother stilled the child
soon after it was born. She was
found guilty of murder and con-
demned to death.
After the hanging, the execu-
tioner cut down the body. The
chaplain said a last prayer. She
was then taken in a cart to the
mortuary where two doctors
certified her dead and then went
home, leaving the corpse to the
silence of the mortuary.
One of the two doctors, how-
ever, returned to collect- some-
thing he'd left behind. While he
was there he thought he heard
a sound. He glanced around, but
could see nothing except the
shrouded corpse. He was about
to leave when he heard a groan,
unmistakable this time.
Thinking someone was hiding
there, he made a thorough
search and while he was doing
so, he was shocked to see the
"corpse" sit up.
Mary Smith was still alive. By
a miracle she had survived the
grim ordeal of being hanged.
In these days, if a murderer
did survive execution, he or she
was often given the benefit of
the doubt
After medical attention, Mary
was given wine and a good meal.
Her neck bore all the marks of
the rope, 'but it had not been
broken. Whether her heart had
actually stopped beating or a
few minutes is not known. This
sort of thing has happened since
then, and it may have been
something of this kind that de-
ceived the doctors who had
signed her death certificate.
Two days later the ex -mur-
deress was formally pardoned
and released. She was met outside
the jail by the man who had
wanted to marry her before the
dashing lover appeared on the
scene. He proposed and was ac-
cepted, and next day the couple
were married.
Mary Smith lived happily for
the rest of her life and became
the mother of several children.
SHAGGY CAT STORY
Into the doctor's surgery
rushed a distraught woman cry-
ing: "Doctor! Please come
quickly. My husband has swal-
lowed a mouse!"
'Hurry back to him:' said the
doctor to humour her, "and ,try
waving a piece of cheese in
front of his mouth. I'll be along
as soon as possible."
When the doctor reached the
house ten minutes later, he
found the husband lying on a
settee with his mouth wide
open, while his wife waved a
kipper close to his face.
"You foolish woman," said
the doctor, "I told you cheese."
"I know that," she retorted,
"but I must get the cat out
first!"
A proud father was talking
about the intelligence of his ,
son.
"You know, dear," he told his
wife, "I think he rnust have got
his brains from me."
"He certainly must have
done," replied the wife. "I've
still got mine."
CROSSWORD
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Answer elsewhere Oft thill pais.
WHAT? NO TOAST? - A creamery turns out nearly four million
pounds of butter annually, aided by this giant aluminum churn.
The churn, scientifically designed to insure rapid production
as well as high quality, turns out butter in one -ton batches.
BUM FRONT
An unsigned communication
from a New York City reader
brings me a clipping I have seen
many times before. This clipping
is now "making the rounds" and
Is prompting all manner ot edi-
torial comment here and there.
That it appeared in this news-
paper January 8 is significant
because I first covered the sub-
ject matter here at least eight
years ago.
This clipping says the poultry
expert at the University of
Michigan says politeness to hens
makes them give more eggs.
Hens respond to thoughtful and
considerate dealings. This is
something the poultry farmer
knew many long years ago and
which the "expert" at Michigan
couldn't have advanced at all
recently if he expected it to be
news.
Clippings like this are an in-
teresting bit of journalism. Year&
ago a clipping began making the
rounds -to the effect that, "Maine
has a law forbidding setting fire
to mules." The first time I saw
this it seemed an amusing nug-
get of curious lore, but after it
began being printed and clip-
ped, prined and clipped, and ap-
peared in any and every publi-
cation I picked up, I began to
wonder about it.
I couldn't find that Maine had
any such law. Maine has arson
and vandalism laws, and laws
forbidding cruelty to dumb ani-
mals, and setting fire to mules
would of course be a crime in
our courts, but any state cer-
tainly has the same provision,
and there is nothing specific
about it as to mules writes John
Gould in The Christian Science
Monitor.
* * *
Indeed, there is little logical
likelihood that Maine would
have such a law, because the
state has never been much of a
place for mules. I can remember
only two pairs that I've seen in
my time. A fellow from Ala-
bama inherited his uncle's salt-
water farm up here, and when
he came to take over his -prop-
erty he brought two aged mules
with him, which were something
of a novelty. .And I know of an-
other pair, years ago, over in
either Bowdoin or Litchfield -
1 used to see them on my way to
visit Uncle Niah's folks.
Other than that, I don't know
of any other mules in Maine, al-
though of course there have
been others. To enact legisla-
tion specifically forbidding ig-
niting mules would therefore
seem to be lavish attention to
something almost nonexistent.
I did consider the chance that
"mule" in this context meant a
spinning machine, of which we
'-have many in our textile mills.
But other than general provi-
sions against deliberate combus-
tion of anything not properly
burnt, 1 couldn't find anything
covering this kind. of mule. A
couple pf lawyer friends got in-
terested in the thing, and off and
on they looked through their
'books, and they told me. the
, item had no standing.
* * *
• Now, there was alWays a "hick
character" yatn in folk humor,
used in vaudeville and minstrel
shows, about the farmer who
had a stubborn animal. Depend-
ing on where the story got told,
it was a horse, mule, ox, yak,
reindeer, or whateVer, and, the
story was that somebody told
the farmer he could start his re-
fractory beast by lighting a fire
under his belly. The farmer did
this, and the gag -line was that
the animal moved just far
enough ahead to burn up the
wagon.
I doubt, myself, if this ever
happened, but on the basis of
"what I tell you three times is
true" the thing became a peri-
patetic clipping, a classic of
American journalism, true be-
cause it was in print and some-
where along the line a law pre-
venting a recurrence was added
to the story. I suspect the nal -
veto of editors toward certain
topics accounts for the wide cir-
culation of such items.
.4' *
And I think politeness to hens
is another such. The word polite-
ness' is added to the story after
it leaves the poultry expert, for
the poultry expert doesn't ex-
actly mean that. I first heard the
thing around 1920 or so when I
was a 4-H boy with a flock Of
Reds. My father paid for the
feed and I sold the eggs, and I
never did better in my book-
keeping.
Each fall we had county con-
tests and hen shows, and always
remarks from poultry experts.
Prof. 0. M. Wilbur, the head of
the hen studies at the University
of Maine, got up one year and
told of his experiments with
noise around poultry flocks. If
you yank the door of the pen
open and barge in swinging
pails and baskets, the hens will
clamber to the rafters, scramble
under the nests, bunch up in the
corners, clobber each other, and
go into a molt. Hens are like
that. But if you stop outside the
door and whistle, cackle friend-
liness, call out hello, or just
knock, the hens will turn and
face the door inquisitively and
won't take fright when you ap-
pear.
* 0 *
I know that I have put this
into previous dispatches, and I
know that since 1920 I have
never gone into a hen pen with-
out first knocking and stating
with elocutionary dignity, "Now
is the time for all good hens and
true to come to the aid of the
parity." This is a mild witticism
between me and my hens, and
while it amuses them a great
deal it should not be scrutinized
too much by humans.
So, the thing is nothing which
makes news at this late date, and
certainly Michigan State Univer-
sity has no special claim on it.
It is handy for filling odd corners
of short columns, and possibly
has an amusement value to city
scribes.
Not that'it matters ton much.
A great many kind folks con-
tinue to send me clippings, each
thinking I may find grist therein,
and my gratitude is shown by
the fact that I usually do, inclu-
ding this one.
START SLOWLY
It was a teenager's first visit
to a perfume counter, Her eyes
roved uneasily over the lurid
trade namest Night of Passion,
Mad Embrace, Irresistible.
'Finally, she mustered enough
courage to approach a saleslady,
"Excuse me," she mumbled,
"but have you anything suit-.
able for -a beginner?"
Most men have two sides to
them -- the side their wives
know, and the side they think
their wives don't know.
By Rev. R. Barclay Warren
B.A., B.A.
Matthew 13: 31-35, 44-52
Kingdom Parables for Today
Memory Selection: The king-
dom of heaven like unto a
merchant man, seeking goodly
pearls; who, when he had found
one pearl of great price, went
and sold all that he had, and
bought it. Matthew 13:45-46.
Jesus Christ will ever remain
the Great Teacher of all time.
With short fictitious narratives
called p*rables he taught great
moral and spiritual truths. He
compared familiar earthly pro-
cesses with truths in the spirit-
ual realm.
The mustard seed is very
small but the herb which grows
from it sometimes reaches a
height of fifteen feet. So the
kingdom of our Lord from in-
significant beginnings spread
over the Roman Empire, over
Europe, America and is now ex-
panding to the ends of the
earth. As a little yeast trans-
forming a great amount of
dough so the Kingdom of Christ
has transformed individuals and
nations. The social order has been
changed. Slavery, polygamy and
other blots on society have giv-
en way with the advance of the
Gospel. The sick and aged re-
eeive care. Justice and liberty
are established.
The parables of the treasure
and the pearl illustrate the
value of the kingdom. When a
person realizes the intrinsic
value of the salvation from sin
provided by Jesus Christ he
will be willing to give up all to
Obtain it. An agnostic professor
in a Hindu college asked Sadhu
Sunder, "What have you found
in Christianity that you did not
have in your old religion?" He
answered, "I have f o un d
Christ." To know Christ is life
eternal.
In the parable of the net and
fishes Jesus teaches that a day
of judgment is coming. Those
who have received Jesus Christ
will be separated from those
who have rejected Him. The
rejectors shall be cast "into the
furnace of fire; there shall be
wailing and gnashing Of teette
We must not ignore the King-
dom of our Lord. He will tril-
uph. If we do not turn from owe
sins and love Him we shall. be
cast frOm 'our God's hely pres-
mice to dwell With the wicked
to eternity.
Perils Of Travel
It is natural that a wife should
get suspicious when her husband
arrives home with his clothes
smelling of perfume. Especially
when this happens day after
day.
So there were quite a number
of suspicious wives in a North
of England town recently-unt0
they learned the real reason why
their husbands came home reek-
ing of scent.
The men -clerks, electricians,
miners and so on -all use a cer-
tain bus for their journey home
from work. Girls from a toilet
soap firm also travel home in the
same bus, all of them smelling as
glamorous as film stars after
their day's work in the factory.
And of course the smell clings
to the men passengers because
in the crowded bus they often
sit next to the factory girls.
One happily married man said
that when he first went home In
the bus, his wife looked puzzled,'
while his mother-in-law 'Welted
annoyed. Another man said that
his wife, after sniffing his coat,
asked him point-blank: 'Who'a
the girl friend?"
SLOW SUCCESS
Thirty thousand copies of
Handel's famous oratorio thi
"Messiah" have to be printed
every year. Yet when Handel
himself tried to sell it, there
were only 127 customers - and
the composer twice went bank-
rupt.
Upsidedown to Prevent Peeking
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CANDID CAMERA CATCHES COPYCATS' COOL CAPERS - Her*
are two of these irrepressible creatures up to their pointed ears
In other people's business. They're copycats, all right, but in
different categories. The "cop? with which morose-lookincs
"Nosey", below, is concerned le.newspaper copy on the editor's
desk of a newspaper. Nosey must be reading of a cat-astrophe,
to judge from his expression. "Freshie", above, shows that
though you may not be able to teach an old hound dog new
tricks, a cat's hep to mimicking a certain guitar -belting singer
who is enjoying a measure of popularity these days. Freshie
kept things moving at the Empire Cat Club Show.
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