HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Brussels Post, 1954-12-22, Page 7THE Calvert SPORTS COIHMiI
4 34t
:11 7evad4ite
• Scleotion of Christmas cards may glee
telephone book and scouring
d ressethrough
h n y pre..
duce headaches, but whatever the
trouble, these activities are important.
They herald the day „hen the entire
christlanworld joins in celebrating,
t'Pt4ace on earth, good will to all men.';
One may be inclined to leek backward at. Christmas time,
If ane looks far enough, one finds that early Christmas ob-
servances on the continent took place in a crude chapel,
ThishwasethenMissionQSte. Maried e: ears the of the
tip of
Georgian Say.
To that wild land of forests and roaring waters, Jean de
IBhad come as a Jesuit man noble and
Anf the re lendof er the ncon-
togethereto of
tort ehtu e rn winter,
be Breton 1"UnetJeunedPu-
cells," a Mimes carol he had written for them in their
own language,
i'hat s something worth thinking about as one str'ugg:es
through mailing lists, with its late omissions and Christmas
shopping, and dressing the tree, and providing the turkey,
We don't have any idea of the words of the Brebeuf carol,
though no doubt it was a simple and reverent piece of
versification."As simple as the days before premature tinsel
and baubles, store -windows of electric .trains, black lace
and ties which once .were considered too gaudy to wear.
So let us forget the crowded stores, the weeks and weeks
of "The Red Nosed Reindeer" and the other tunes with which
Tinpan Alley cuts in on the Christmas dollar, and say with
Thackeray;
I wish you health, and love and mirth,
As fits the Solemn Christmas -tide.
As lie h (be -holy Christmas birth,
s, good friends, our carol still . ,
Be peace on earth, be peace on earth,
. To men of gentle will.
Yourcemmenh and suggestions For this column will be welcomed
'by Elmer Ferguson, -c/o Calued House, 431 Yong. Si., Toronfe.
CainTit•
DISTILLERS LIMITED
otneete
Couldn't Talk Till'
He Pell In Love
- Angeline, son of Signor and
Signora Paoli, of "Marcia, a vil-
lage near Pisa, was from the
early days of his childhood un-
able to talk to anybody but his
mother. His parents thought
this was a mere phase in his
development, and that in time.
it would disappear.
But that is where they were
wrong. The affliction appeared
to be a 'permanent one. An-
geline could not talk to anybody
else, in spite of the special
trouble his father used to take
with him. No doctor could give
a satisfactory explanation. So
Angeline grew to manhood.
When news about hila began
to get about, a radio reporter
arrived at the Paoli home. With
him he brought a microphone,
and, strangely encu?h, Angel-
ino.had tie difficulty in speaking
afew words into It,
In` this way his dfiction be-
tame known to the world. Hun-
dreds of letters poured in, among
them one from a young Dutch
girl named Cokke Verwer, who
showed such sympathy with 'the"
young rnafeelizat. a regiiarrcdre
- respondence sprang up between
them. "'
Then recently Cokky came to
see-AAngelino. They ,fell in love
with each other ate -first sight,
and than the miracle happened.
Suddenly Angeline began talk-
ing to Cokliy. He chattered so
fast he could hardly be made to
atop.
In a few months' time they
will marry. Cokky has returned
home, but Angeline keeps en
talking.
REAL LOG SHS:..
Ever tried to find a needle' in
a haystack? In other words,
have you ever attempted to
.find something which' appeared
Irretrievably Iost?
That's what some people did
in . South-West Africa. They
tried to find a gem smaller than
a match -head, lost in sixty exiles
of scrub desert. And now comes
news that they have succeeded.
The gem was one of a dozen
or more which encircled 'a ring
worn by Mrs. Priscilla Whyman.
She visited the desert, which is
a vast diamond mine, and some-
where amid those sixty miles of
scrub she accidentally dropped
the gem. She only missed it
when she chanced to glance at
her ring fitter returning to
Johannesburg, 800 miles from
the mine.
Diamond "'company facials
instituted whet appeared to be a
hopeless Search' for the gem.
Mat Was last' February. And
now !im'egine the amazement of
a worker in that desert mine the
otllee day ellen he suddenly saw
amidet heap .ok'lanteelesaipebbles
the polished glitter of ti`snrooth-
ly cut diamond.
The Taw of chance, operating
at odds of 150,000,000,000,000 to
one against the woman getting
her jewel back, had 'enabled
him to find the missing stone.
Says Mrs. Whyman: "The
diamond could have fallen any-
where,
for I covered much
ground during my visit tothe
mine. It was a fantastic" chance
which brought it bank to me!"
longest Telegram—Pretty Gerry Brown (right) of CJAD Jn Man -
treat reads off names to Wanda Jekel of Canadian National
Telegraphs, More than 20,000 persona signed a "Cheer Up
Chuck" telegram to be sent to Alouotfe Halfback Chuck Hun-
Singer in Harrisburg, III. The radio station sponsored the message
Which measured more than Soo feet long --the longest telegram
ever sent between the two countries.
Scientific Notions
About Criminals ,
Cesare .Lolnbreeee a. surgeon,
gave the World his theory that
the beret crhnithtl bears certain
peculiarities and abnormalities
which stigmatiye'him with, the
marls of Cain, -F3ut he was at
-
Melted for hl;,: idea as hotly as
if he had'anaerted that there is
no dlifereree at all between
criminals aid honest men, "
Perhaps :lilat is exactly whet
he •did mean; for when a com-
mittee tested his ,theories on
selected groups from prisons on
the one hdnd,' and the gilded
youth bf -Universities on the
other, they couldn't find any
difference worth talking about,
It must, be admitted that Lam-
broso did rather ask for trouble
in asserting that the thief' may
be recognized by the mobility of
his hands and features, his yel-
low complexion and his inability
to blush, while the, inurdeeer
could be spotted by his cold and
glassy eye and spasmodic' con-
tractions of the Hp which ex-
posed the canine teeth,
The forger was alleged to have
a kind of clerical appearance,
while an air of good nature only
too often masked the poisoner.
One can imagine that this sort
of thing. bit home on various
pillars of respectability and
virtue.
Although Lombroso may have
pushed his theories too far,
there certainly have been some
o d d i t i,e s among criminals.
Tropprnann, the Alsatian who
murdered eight people, was
slight and youthful but his
hands were gigantic, with enor-
mous thumbs out of all propor-
tion, Incidentally, the late -Adolf
Hitler had abnormally long
thumbs.
D},unollard, the French assas-
sin had a hare lip, and De Mel-
ker, the South African poisoner.
had a cleft palate, '"tacit the
Something To "Brood" About -. Mama's looking woeful about
the sad, situation, but this biddy on the M. O. Olsen farm has
cheerfully _gone to the dogs. She mothers the pups constantly,
and rules the roost completely when Mama goes out for a walk.
Ripper was supposed, to have
long arms and the agility of an
ape, while a young man who
committed manslaughter at the
tender age of twelve was adorn- •
ed with webbed feet.
Hilaire Belloe relates the
story of the Skull of Charlotte
Corday, who was regarded as a
heroine because at the height of
the French Revolution she stab-
bed one of the revolutionary
leaders in his bath" Someone
sent her skull to Lombroso who
used the peculiarities he dis-
covered in it to illustrate a work
on Pol tical Criminal Women,"
The joke was that the skull
had been sold to a dealer by an
impecunious medical student
and was no more Charlotte Cor -
day's than it was Queen Anne's!
It's A. Possibility -- Dr. Wallet R. Dornberger, in Wile expert, told
the institute of Aeronautical Sciences that in 10 or 15 years
rocket -propelled airliners traveling 13,000 mph are a possibility.
This is an artist's conception of what such a rocket airliner might
look like. Dornberger is a former general in the German army.
nM�>iyI Jolt
slid Their �..,
A member of the cast of a
Broadway play was recently
fired for playing pranks. The
part of a prankster' called for
her to mix a drink for one of the
actors. At one perforillance she
added a liquid distilled from
herbs which' had the- effect of
puckering his mouth, as a result
of which he could hardly speak
his .lines.
Tough luck on the culprit,
tough luck on the victim; but
this measure of reprisal Certain-
ly won't deter other practical
jokers. They've been with us
through the ages, and are a
pretty hardy race.
The Hudson River is, for the
most part, very wide, even
more so than the group of loaf-
ing "wide" boys who were
throwing stones into it. Stop-
ping to watch their antics was a
big raw-boned Yankee wee had
made his way from the back-
woods into New York State, A
little etime elapsed before the
stone -throwers began ribbing the
newcomer.
In ',reply to their taunts, he
explained that .he wasn't too
bad at throwing, himself, Only
recently he had heaved a man
clear across a river back home
and et he could even heave a
men right across the Hudson,
Otte of the New Yorkers
promptly laid down ten dollars.
The feat was impossible, he
said.
Grasping the challenger by
the slack of his trousers, the
Yankee promptly flung him
straight into the river, Crawl.
Ing out, the shiverer asked for
him winnings. Nothing doing;
for, steed the big man, "I didn't
wager to do it the 'first time;
Just said I could do it, and: S tell
you I can."
With that. the dripping vic-
tim was again Bung into the
river. "Third time..never fails,"
muttered the thrower as the
soaked man struggled gasping
to the shore. But by this time
the victim was through. The
joke had gone far enough; ten
dollars changed hands, and the
giant went on his way.
Setting the seal on a hilarious
subject is H, Alien Smith's book
"The Compleat Practical Joker."
It's one long laugh from begin-
ning to end, and as loopy as the
antic spirit that saves those who
figure in it.
Motoring ' in this juggernaut
age was a great adventure,
driver and passengers waiting
for the explosion that might
hurl them to kingdom come. It
was in those good old days, re-
cords the author`, that Roy Fur-
ber - brother of the famous
humorist James Thurber -
thought up a lively prank to
Ay on his father.
Roy collected together a great
many articles from the kitchen,
bundled them up in canvas and
fixed them beneath the family
ear in suclr a mariner that a tug
on an extending string would
release the whole collection.
Fater, contentedly enjoying
a drive, was suddenly shaken
to the core by a clatter of
knives, forks, tin-openers, pie
dishes, pat lids, ladles and egg
beaters failing'noially on to the
road. "Stop the car!" he yelled,
"I can't," replied Boy. "The
ergine fell out." His father's
remarks when the joke was.ex-
plained to him are not recorded.
Well up on the list of funsters
is Jim Moran, an American who
hit upon a hair-raising means of
relieving the tedium of driving
endless miles alone in his cal',
He bought a rubber mask de-
picting the face of an idiotic
character. This he fitted to the
back of his head, his vision for
the road ahead rtnnaining un-
obscured. Bowling along at a
fair' speed he would wait until
he spotted another motorist pull- '
ing out to pass him, then lean
out of the window with the
idiotic, goon -like face looking
back.
She effect on the overtaking
motorist must have been shock-
ing, writes Mr. Smith. He would
see the leering goon at the
wheel of a speeding car, looking
back with no apparent regard
for the highway ahead or the
safety of other road -users!
There are quite a number of
surnames in existence which
leave their owners wide open to
ready-made shafts of wit. Mr.
Pierce Bottom became weary of
jokes about his names. He de-
cided to redirect the fun; dish
it out instead of always being
the victim.
Wading throut,'h telephone
directories he seught out people
with "bottom" in their names!
Bottom, Bottomley, Winterbot-
tom, Throttleboteem, Greenhot-
tom, Sidebottom, Higginbottom.
To these and manyothers he
sent engraved invitations to a
dinner to be served in the sub-
basement of a London building.
The majority of the "bottoms"
turned up; but not Pierce Bot-
tom, The result was that the
guests had to pay their own
bills. Among other items on the
menu was, of course, rump roast.
H. Allen Smith relates an
amusing incident which con-
cerns two famous writers, great
friends, who were setting off for
a lecture tour in the. United
States.
When they had -taken their
seats 10 ibe train it appeared.
that only one ticket could be
'found by the writer to whotre the
job of getting tickets had been
delegated" The collector could
'be heard making his way along
the compartments, and the man
without a ticket became panicky.
"Drop clown there," said his ';
friend, indicating the boor, "and '.
Al lay this suitcase aoross.you
he won't notice you."
His friend dropped to the
floor, crouching as low as pos-
sible. The heavy suitcase -was
placed across his back. In came
the collector with his punch, and
was handed two tickets by the
other writer"
Who's the other one for?"
asked the official.
"It's for my friend down
there," came the reply, accom-
panied by a handwave to indi-
cat the hunched figure beneath
the suitcase.
"What's he dein' down there?"
demanded the railwayman,
"Oh, he always travels that
way!"
In the days when the tele-
phone was of the stand -up -
receiver -on -the -hook variety, a
practical joker ,telephoned six
of his friends. Disguising his
voice he explained that he was
a telephone engineer and that
the Iines were to be cleaned out.
He strongly advised them to
cover their phones -tie a sheet
over them, or a pillow -case,
even a large paper bag would
do because "we're going to blow
out the lines, and if you don't
have your instrument Covered,
there'll be dirt and grease all
over your house,"
The prankster then visited his
six friends in turn and was high-
ly delighted to notice. that in
each case his instructions had
been Obeyed!
ISSUE 52 -- 1954
CLASSIFIED ADVERTISING
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Trap For Rabbits
Caught A Lion
Kruger National Park in
South Africa is the one place
in the British Commonwealth
8f 'Nations where Adventure
with a capital A abounds. On
the -roads one meets lions -and
not zoo -tame lions either -ele-
phants, a score of other animals.
With its 8,000 square miles
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Severe penalties ranging up
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ping in the park, and natives
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Recently two natives " set
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Both were severely mauled be-
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At Letaba, the elephants'
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Quick as a flash (elephants
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ped over on its side.
There are fourteen rest
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visitors can go to see the real
pride 01 the park, the thirty-
six lions, nearly all cubs, who
have been reared to treat their
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Lion cubs can be lovely lit-
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the game warden has to watch
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They reached their car, and
as it was pulling away the na-
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over whatever it was that
growled. It tuned out t� be a
tWo•week-old lion cub.
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