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The Brussels Post, 1916-6-8, Page 2A DAMAGED A AG D think of such a thg, f course—bit E BOD if I was to, would you join the .arm O E' elan Proposes then, for home Service, say ?» defiantly.w"There's my busine s for red her TRAVELS 300 MILES ono thing, And then supposingA the Joe Cannon had .one outstanding Germans did land in England? I peculiarity—he was an honest man might have to fight, and get killed." BROUGHT SAFELY TO PORT Maybe it was lack of imagination thet "Oh, you are a coward!" she cried; WITH A BROKEN NOSE, impelled him always to tell the truth, and with that turned to leave him. even about his feelinge in regard to the war, But, whatever the cause, it made him abysmally unpopular among his felows. IIe would, for instance, admit quite frankly that he didn't want to join the "Supposin' I got killed?" said he. "But you're not married, and you ain't gob anybody dependin' on you," his mates pointed out. "You're just one c' the men as wouldn't be missed much by anybody." "I got a sort of an idea I should miss myself," said Joe, "if I was dead." Then he was asked: "Ain't you got any patriotism 10 you?" To which he would reply: "Of course I have. It's because I love my country so much that I don't want to leave it." , "And you call yourself an English- man!" his interlocutor would exclaim in disgust. "Why, even them there Germans ha' got more pluck 'n you!" "I. know they have," said Joe. "That's what makes nee so frightened of 'em!" "Right you are!" he assented cheer- fly. "I only asked. And there's more fish in the sea 'n ever came out of it." I She tossed her head and walked away stiffly. He laughed softly to himself, and also walked away, But he walked only as far as the sweet - f stuff -shop. There, behind the counter was another girl he knew. "Quarter -pound o' your best choeo. laths," said Joe. She served him, and he handed the bag back to- her. "For you," said he. "Well, you must be a fool, Joe Can - nn!" she cried. "Can't you understand ! I'm that sick of the stuff I wouldn't give you a thank'you for a ehopful?" "Give 'em to the poor, then," said Ihe, slightly crestfallen. "I don't want 'em. What I want is to ask you a question." 1 "No charge for asking questions. Well?" "I was wondering if you'd marry me," he said. She stared and gasped. If you was serious—" "I'm quite serious." "Marry you!" "Why not? You jest let the idea Strikes Mine and Suffers Greatly, but Mechanism Prevents Explosion, In a certain dockyard in England there is to be found a splendid tri- bute to the prowess of British sub- marines and the skill of those who man them, It is one of the finest of the British undersea beide, which, with her bow twisted and bent as the result of a collision with an enemy mine in enemy waters, covered a dis- tance of almost three hundred miles under her own power and arrived safe- ly in a home port. Through the courtesy of the British Admiralty I was permitted to see this submarine and talk with her officers and crow, writes a London correspondent, She is in harbor, with her bow fac- ing torn into strips and, two of her torpedo tubes crushed. Her plates are crumpled, two of her bulkheads are broken away at the bow; but in her tubes are two unexploded torpe- does. Their casing is twisted and stayed in and the mouth of the aft ficers and the men of the crew waited, JOFFRE'S APPETITE. He seemed to have no sense of sink in a minute, said he, and once tube is jammed. But the quality submerged, at some 200 feet below shame. When the girls twitted him more ran through the list of his elig- of the high explosive in her torpedoes water level, not knowing 'whether or Commander of French Forces. Is Fond with hie $Acowardice, he merely smiled ible qualities. sbviousl and the mechanism controlling it pre, not their bulkheads were destroyed, a slow,said: She y impressed, even vented an exlposion, thus saving her whether their instruments wero it "That's right enough, my dear. But . as Naomi Clark had been. t from total destruction. one thing I ain't afraid of." "I£ you was in khaki now—" she She struck the mine head on, The reparably damaged, a up again in nto "And what's that'"' the inquired murmured collision smashed they would ever come • up again into ALL'S WELL IN SALONIKT. The cable reports that Greece has now got quite friendly with the allies is emphasized by the above picture, showing General Sassail, French com- mander at Saloniki, inspecting troops with Madame Skolvadis, wife of the Greek commander at the same place. of Cabbage. 9 The chef of a famous Paris restaur- ant has become cook to Gen Joffre at Ile'"iiii��0fl uol,:l) ,uelli111IIIIIIIhip"'`:,• r, .5,.1`0' �g s ��r_11111111,12' . LEI* ORD .�. IRD IIIIIII �Iill' 1 , 4 'Ullu1 1111 ..,11111[111' u �� •N; L'N��.iLCi AYl Vii{ g' _ u ?. NOT MADE IN GERMANY. The Teutons Are Not as Clever as They Profess. Germany has all the geniuses on her hooka, according to her own opin- ion. If it were' not for phalcespoare, who was probably a naturalized' Ger- man, we should have nobody to brag about. Well, let us see. There is : Shake- speare's friend,' for -instance, the greatest of the world's philosophers, who laid the foundation of all modern science. Then whab about Sir lease Newton? He was the man who, from seeing an apple fall, deduced the universal law of gravitation, who found the invisible wires on which the universe is hung, and who probably was the greatest mathematician who ever lived; and certainly the greatest of all natural philosophers. Then there's Milton. Germany has no' rival eibher for Shakespeare or Milton. They are above all Hunnish standards. y q son sines a two of he: hulk the sunlight. It was his ship that he his headquarters. It was an accident Who is the maker of modern elec- cuxiously. If T was in khaki now I might be heads, broke all glass aboard her and seemed to think of above all other that brought him in touch with the tries! science? A German! Nol a nistoun. He was one of the oldest "I ain't afraid to be afraid," said he, dead in a week or two, and no earthly sent the crew sprawling to the floor t things. famous Generali He was mobilized I simple Englishman who rose from the parochial schoolmasters in Scotland. "like lots o' these other gasbags! good to any girl," said he. of the compartments But her for "We found out . what we'd m the ordinary and h tanks, Michael Faraday. He found The death of Mr. W Weir Grieve FROM OLD SCOTLAND` • NOTES OP INTERI5ST FROM ITER BANGS ANI) BRAES. What Is Going On in the Highlands and Lowlands of Auld Scotia. For the past fifteen months a suce eessful V. A D. hospital has been conducted in the Abbey Buildings at Fort Augustus by the Scottish Red Cross Society. - Mr. William Wilson who has been a member` of the teaching profession for over 50 years has intimated his resignation of Arbirlot Public School, near Arbroath, Operations are now in progress in connection with the deepening and ex- tension of Eyemouth harbor, which when completed will greatly expedite the landing of the fish. The strike of the jute workers in Dundee still continues and no effort has been made on either side to bring the dispute to a close. Thirty thous- and workers are affected. The Red Cross Fund raised by the textile and drapery bride in Scot- land, it expected, will provide at least ten motor ambulances. Over £21,000 has been subscribed. The Committee of Privy Council on Education in Scotland have appointed Mr. A. 0. Curie, director of the Na- tional Museum of Antiquities, Edin- burgh,bo be director of- the .Royal Scottish Museum. The death has occurred in his 91st year, of Mr. William Whyte, retired schoolmaster, at his residence, Den- • a remark which made him more un- What else he said does not matter. pedoes did note lode; her engines » a come lain y Way, when the I , g to, he said. "Then it was whether War Minister gave instructions that I electricity a toy; he left it the coining the sheriff -clerk of Lanarkshire, has popular than ever. It is enough that she would neither did r '. stop; her !fats did not fail to five could make a port alone. The as far as possible men were to be force of the world. removed one ,of the best-known of - "Well show him!" said Sorner, al-' accept nor refuse him. register: She dropped to the bottom employed in situations similar to And steam? Was Stephenson who ficials from the administration of the That is, we ready a corporal. "I've got an idea!"' "I'll think it over," was her final of the sea and the water flooded in could send;awe coouldn t receive. We those they had occupied in civilian life has covered the globe with ribs of law in the County Buildings, Glas- Next day Joe found himself the cen- word. "And you think over that idea under the doors of the torpedo tubes took a look at the bow •ficin the chef became a cook again. gow• tre of an interested, excibed ,group. of enlistin'." ft h gat the steel rails, a German? Moreover, just as Newton establish - aft. a .. But within ten minutes after bulkheads. • They looked pretty bad, Unfortunately he is not satisfied A party of 35 French and British "Heard the latest?" asked Sorner. "Not me!" he said;' and then, as the collision she had been righted, hanging •loose in strips. But we de- with his distinguished master's pal- ed the universal law which unifies the, members of the Franco -British Inter- " 'Tain't out yet," said Joe. before: "But never mind. I only ask- come to the surface and turned her tided we could make it. The engines ate, Hhe says the General prefers universe, so Darwin established the Parliamentary Committee recently vis - "I mean about.this Lord Derby ed. There's more fish in the sea 'n noes toward home. were right, and there wasn't a broken beef that has been boiled in the soup law which binds all living things, the ited Glasgow, where they were enter - scheme." ever came out of it." When I looked at her lying there dial aboard her. The periscope was to the finest culinary efforts in the great law of evolution. And though tained by the corporation and public "No. 1 ain't got no time to waste When he had been listeningdgen f from behind the her mother, who with her exposed tubes shining in true. It was, only her nose and her way of filets of sole cooked with a these are the great epoch-making men bodies. reading the sunlight and her bulkheads in there are ten thousand others who A petition in which the Lord Pro - "They re goingto take all the un- door of the shop-parlor,rated her rudder that were gone. wine sauce. He is also extremely married menu o fortyfirst" sound! strips of rusty iron it seemed iucredf- "So we started back. •If we picked fond of cabbage, but at every meal make the name of Briton one to con- vest is asked to call a meeting of the P y ole that she had been under the coast urs w• i JoeJoe looked uneasy. Perhaps I'll have him, after all," up anybody on the wireless we knew he insists on having a salad, which J th. oo d'you hear that?" he de- said the girl. i guns of the enemy, that she could that they had work of their own to he eats with hard boiled eggs and Yes, and we talk about German of "Andperhaps you won'tget the f have made in her damaged condition a do• So we drove along under our flavors copiously with an English ficiency. We say, "Look at the per mended. erha s journey of three hundred miles, re- d sea, sauce. section of the organization of her "Headquarters," replied the corporal chance," rejoined her mother. "An' turning to a safe harbor with the in- but we wn made it r. It wasThe iwav st of abroke One day M. Clemenceau came to army. Well, look at the perfection laconically. young men so scarce an' all nowa- formation that she had been sent to of tate or anization of our Navy. Now, the trouble with honest pee- days." obtain. And added to this was the over the bridge and pounded the one lunch with Gen, Joffre, and to the die- g Y. We bulkhead we had left forward. may of the chef brought his own have specialized on the ocean, while she has done the same on land. a box of marcaroni, which he instruct- citizens nstruct But Germany has still to produce a citizens'ef Glasgow to consider the question whether enemy aliens should - be allowed to teach and reside and r enemy alien professors teach, has been opened for signatures on the Glasgow Royal Exchange. Owing to the rapid spread of fire in a block of warehouses in Glasgow a large number of girls were in dan- ger, but managed to escape through a covered passage. A porter and a boy were cut off by the flames and hauled through a window. The dam- age was estimated at $50,000. At the Convention of Royal Burghs at Edinburgh it was stated that greab dissatisfaction is felt through- out Scotland at the administration of the National Relief 'Fund. Glasgow has subscribed, $1,300,000 to the fund, and only $30,000 has been returned for distribution. TOY MAKERS IN TRENCHES. Spent Bullets and Shrapnel Splin- ters Are Used. The correspondent of the Neue Zuricher Zeitung tells of trvo interest- ing episodes of trench warfare on the Western front, which indicates that now and then there are some pleas- ant moments to relieve the monotony of the soldier's life. "Among the German troops," he says, "a new industry has been de veloped in the trenches. From the spent bullets of the French troops the _ • Germans are making toy soldiers: The bullets are melted and the lead poured into forms. The toy soldiers • are expressed to Germany, where they are painted, and made ready for ship- ping by toy manufacturers. From shrapnel splinters the soldiers menu- ' facture neat and artistic paper weights, knives, &c. There is much competition among the soldiers to gather the bulleth mid shrapnel, as they are enabled to make some extra money thereby, and now and :hen complaint is made that the French do not send over enough shrapnel to meet the demand. "In Metz 1 heard of another in -tw- eeting episode. In a German trench' there is an officer who is e Tine violin- ist, and during lulls in the firing, and- especially at night, lie entertains his. comrades with selections from the masters. When he starts playing quiet also reigns in the French trenches opposite, and when he fin- %rhes a selection the Frcnch applaud him as much as his own men. de • - cently the French called to hien, "Jouez-nous la Marsaillaise, S'll Vous plait," The officer quickly respond- ed .by playing the French national hymn, for which the French acknow- ledged their than]cs. After all, hu- man nature is human nature every *here, even in war time, and this in eident demonstrated tome that there le no real bitterness of hatred among the men in rthe trenches for soh 'oth- er," ple is that they are often too ready Joe Cannon had other adventures bo take other people's honesty for that afternoon; for now that he had granted. Not for a moment did Joe decided to get married he was resolve , doubt Sorner's integrity, ed to have the matter settled, one "When do that come into force?" he way or another, as soon as possible. fact that she had made the voyage in a high sea; that for twenty hours, defenceless, she evaded the enemy patrols. I had heard stories of German sub - "And so," he said and smiled, "we lunch with him. He handed the cook came home." ed him to boil in water "not salted too Nelson.—London Answers. GERMAN FAIRY TALES. much." Then he took two bananas �-'i' — from a paper bag and said they were ` CIIILD POVERTY." asked nervously. I But in every case the answer was , marines sunk by a single shot, so 1 `o be put on the table. Joffre and "In force now," answered Sorner. ' the same. None of the girls seamed asked one of the officers how his boat Amazing Stories Have Been Told to Clemenceau drank mineral water with Low Percentage of Children in Ger- Joe bit his underlip, and pondered. quite prepared to say "Yes" to a had survived the tremendous shock of the Mohammedans. their lunch, but the ex -Prime Minister man Officials' Families. "You said 'unmarried men,' didn't swain who had not donned khaki, a mine explosion, you?" he stammered at last. i while they were equally reluctant to Her Strength Saves "'Unmarried men' first," replied : say "No" to Joe Cannon, the prosper -1 g Bishop Stileman ata t' House in London said of • meeting at had to forego his dessert, for the g As one means of bringing about Her. Church L d General ate one of the bananas with much-needed reforms in conditions Sorner; "as is only right." l ous greengrocer. Joe was in a real i "She held because of her strength," enemies had Circulated many false. such relish that he promptly offered hoods among Mohammedans. The him the other, which was accepted. Prevailing among petty office -holders "So that if I was married—" quandry by the end of his day's hap-; he said. "It broke her nose and it and officials in Germany—those who "Yes, but you ain't," someone re- ,hazard courting.Half the likelydam- tore off two of her bulkheads. But first was that Germany was now a Gen. Foch, who sometimes goes to hold such positions as postal and tele - minded him. "And you ain't thirty sels in the district had taken him "on! she held. The efficiency of the great power which sought above lunch with his chief, always asks for „ yet, not by a longchalk." a royal"; yet he did not feat that he� everything else to bring Islam u pp. pumps was not impaired. Within two g p That same afternoon Joe waylaid had surmounted the difficulty. minutes we had them working.,, to the position of supremacy which Uaomi Clark, who was admittedly the; On the morrow an agitated group Haln Mehemet Guilliame, and it Ile asked me if I would not go be- to some extent it occupied 1,000 Belle of Porter's Row. 1 of khaki -clad heroes was clustered' low and see the marks of the die- years ago. The Kaiser was called "Where you goin', Naomi?" he i about the bar of the Windmill. {aster. So I followed him across a greeted her. I "Fine thing we been and done, I gangway and upon the narrow iron was said that he lay three days and "I was going for a walk," she said; don't think," growled Sorner, "tellin' deck which already was beginning to three nights before the Khaba but ld Sb' k 'n th mud h 'd b d I show red patches of rust The hatch Shrine, and at the end a great voice a tablet of chocolate and two "croie- graph employes—the Union of -Ger- a cants," the little horseshoe rolls so man Officials Associations" is calling beloved by Parisians, which they have especial attention in these days to the not been able to obtain since the war. extraordinary "child poverty" in Ger- President Poincare's present chef man officialdom. has often cooked meals • for the Kai- This poverty, which is particularly ser, as ha used to be chef to M. Jules to be deplored at the present time, is Cambon, the last French Ambassador largely clue, it is declared, to the long Iay I—" o Steck-in-the-mud - e- as e e made came to him distinct! at Berlin It was this artist—for the training periods now neeessary, which to go if he didn't go villin him hero was open. Below I could see a y as the envoy make ib all but f . 1 � :white compartment with brass fit- the Saviour Islam and of Allah S of I Kaiser has referred to him nn an art impossible or officials "But now I've met you," she added a bachelor .Now none o the gull 11 Pto marry until they are in their late cruelly, "I'm going straight back :look at us. All after him. That young tinge. the Sword of the Lord saying "Arise ret—who cooked the lunch for eighty twenties or even 30 years old. In con - home." !Naomi Clark! She'd as good as pro- . I do not know what I expected to and fight. persons when the allied delegates A were recently the guests of the Pre- sequence, officials have, and have had sident at the Elysee. ,0 FIGHTING TOFREE EARTH. Teuton Challenge Accepted to Uphold many significant the latest available statistics regarding postal employes British Ideals. in the empire. In their ranks, it is The London Times publishes the fol- found, the lower officials' have an "That's all right," he said brightly.: raised to wait for me till after thefind, but when I stood in this come i pother more dangerous falsehood "What I got to say to you won't take ! war, and now—now she keeps puttin' , partment I could see no traces what- ; was that we British had one object long. I suppose you've never thought 1 me off—she will an' she won't—" 1 soever of the catastrophe. Directly ; In waging this war, and that was a' gettin' married someday?" I "Same wi' my girl!" a fiery -headed in front of me the four rear doors of that we had the bones of all the Pharaohs in"Never!" said Naomi, twinkling. youth broke in. "'Sorry an' all that, I the torpedo tubes, painted a brilliant, that we should Museum, and What girl ever did?" I Jim,'she says, 'but I've as good as white, and to my right and left the : never be satisfied un- "I thought they might sometimes," I promised Misber Cannon.' 'That ! great shining torpedoes -were clamp- , til we captured the Sacred Cities of said Joe. "Men do, you know. I've skunk!' I says. 'Yon see, Jim, there's I ed in their racks. Only the wheel Mecca and Medina and rill rl the Pro - been thinking of ib myself, this last' his business to think of,' she said, controlling the bow rudder was not l phet s tomb, hour or so." !making excuses for the swab. 'Oh, it's i true. The slender brass rod sup- The third was that the whole brood "And who had you got in your his business you're after, not him!' I i porting it had suffered from the vibra- of Hohenzollerns were descended from mind?" asked Naomi. I says. An' then she begins to pipe her tion. I the sister of Mehemet and therefore "Nobody in particular," answered Joe; "but you mostly." Sure, I'm very much flattered, Mister Cannon!" "Suppose you wouldn't have me?" he queried doubtfully. "Suppose again and you'll suppose eye, and say as how she really liked i This was the only mark made by the those who revere the name of their me ever so much the best, only—' mine of the enemy. Not that it was Prophet were found to rally round the out of madness nor for glory or gain marriages in Germany—on whish ani " Ito b estimated Central Powers. , o ` th dd h their •t I I The Persian papers circulated the P for years, smaller families than. al- most any other branch of employes in Germany. The union referred to cites as espe- lowing by Rudyard Kipling; When Germany challenged us,- near- ly two years ago, to uphold with our lives the ideals by which we professed to live, we accepted the challenge, not average of 2.4 children per family; the middle officials but 1.8 children i and the higher officials only 1.7. The , figures become more striking when 1 compared with the average for all ply— a esttma a as minor damage, for but to make good those rafeesions, average are blessed with 3.6 children.1 There was a doleful silence, during a ru ere ave teir psi to p ny in story that a giant German aeroplaneSince then the allies and our Em- Tho tendency of the war is to in the rise and dive and it was neoes which each man drank deep and long, eery to come up from the bottom of 1 equipped with a huge magnet had pire have fought that they and all crease rather than to diminish the But the beer was not so bitter as their( visited Petrograd, Paris and London the earth may be free from the in- number of petty officials ill Germany, thou hos. the sea. Not a simple matter with 1 the earth domination of German ideals• for it fs the atnbftiort of a great num- wron ," said she. g " the rudders not under control. land that the huge magnet had suc-ber of "whynot?" " "You see " one of the officers ex ceeded in drawing up the Czar, French , We did not see or foresee the 'size their old wounded men -unfitted for g Only ono thing to de, said Sorner p But said he. I got a at last. "Tell him we was wrong , ianof the task when it opened; we dooceupations—to eettle down good business. Brings me in a mat- about that information from head- Planed to me, "we didn't know what arenowalld Ring George, and they 'not flinch from ft now. Long months. in some little position which gives him i ter o' four or five quid a week, clear quarters. Tell him that fellers as had happened—the water was pouring prisoners in Berlin. have schooled us to the fall knowledge the prestige of a little title and the profit, one way and another. You et married now the new order's ousel in aft and brokenglass was every -Many of our British consoler and Rus- » g siert officials had been murdered at right to call himself a "Beamter;" The 1 might do worse. count as unmarried." where. We didn't know how much of ' Naomi regarded him with grave, "Think he'll believe us?" her was gone. We knew that every' I the instigation of the Germans. and have tempered us nationally and individually to meet it. The nations within the Empire have created, maintained and rein- fuller.the ranks get, the greater, of e en ency or salaries to course, is th t d f considering eyes. It was true enough, "Him! He'd believe anything." man aboard had been knocked flat I Poor Man --"I've, never been able to drop. 48 he said, that she might do worse. 1 "How about the girls he's proposed on his face, that the glass off the { save anything." Milliohaire—"Then forced from their best the greatest Joeh o, , might be a toward, but he was t thought? Matter r o' six or so dials was rattling about ixnder foot' , J, armies which theydevote without you ve saved yourself a lot of wort not altogether a fool. He had steadily ain't there?" But we didn't know what was to be- y' ti t th' Th h increased his trade as a greengrocer "So I understand," said Storner. come of us. I until now he had virtually a monopoly'' "Ah, well, they must fight it out "It was fine, you know, to see the ' tai tfaassanertste of local custom. Then he was Young, among 'emselves. And I can only crew. They got on their feet and at! f7�' he was tall, and not ill -looking; he hope," he added, with a broadening their places before the commander had' had no tics of any sort, and was, above grin, "as ,toe'1l get hisealf mixed up 1 time to order them there. In two all, both kind and good-tempered. in that there little rumpus when it minutes the order to rise had gone Indeed,' bo was something of a catch happens. I reckon if he does, he'll , through to the engine room and the as the saying is. And insuch neigh- wish he'd taken on the Germans in- 1 pumps were going. But whether we borhoods as Porter's Row it behoves stead after a11," I were going to rise or not remained a girl to miss no chances, especially And at the cheering prospect of Joe 1 to be seen. now that eligible mon are so scarce. Cannon in the thick of a feminine "Then they threw it the levers, We Such husbands as Joe Cannon did not fall into their laps like ripe apples every day, ".I couldn't marry a mall that wasn't In khaki," she protested, "But men in khaki ofton get killed," he pointed out; "Anel then what's to become o',tleeir widows?". "The Goverment---•-" "I don't know what, they pay, but I bet ft ain't nlore'n a quid at most— and handsome, tool "scrap," the dismal faces of the con- spirators quite cheered up,—London Answers. Digestion. According to a French scientist, digestion proceeds more swiftly when persons are recumbent than when erect because in the process of evo- lution the stomach has not advanced "tf I was to marry, you ---I couldn't as rapidly as other organs. waited. That was a bad minute. Then the broken glass began to rattle around under foot again. We were moving. We weren't long in getting up. At any time there's nothing like corning up into the air and sunlight after you've been under for a bit. tut this was different, Yes, this was a bit different. So eve started iootcing her over, for the damage." Thought Only of His Ship. This was hoW he told me the story of the black Interval when these of - FOR EVERY SPOR )(ND RECREATIO MOLD BY Alt. WISOHEY lr1-,I. 1 tl($p quas on o is issue. ey ave emerged, one by one, as powers clothed with power through discipline and sacrifice. Strong for good by their hitter knowledge of the evil they are meeting, and wise in the un'. purchasable wisdom of actual achieve.: menti. Knowing, as nations, what we fight for; realizing, as mon and women, the resolve that has been added to us by whet each has endured, we go forward unrjee the proud banner of our griefs and Deimos to greater effort, greater endueanco and if need be, to henvier sacrifices tie equal sponsors for' he de- iWeratieeof mankind. Live and Let Live. "We eat entirely too much. You know ono -third of what.wo oat en - Wee us to live." "Well, if that's the case, what he - conies of the other two-thirds?" "Oh, they enable the doctor to live." Wouldn't Stand for It. In Cleveland they tell a story of a boy who left school to work for a small manufacturer. The boy was dull, and his stupidity annoyed his employer greatly. So, after a week's trial, he was discharged. "Get your pay," said the reanufao- turer to him on Saturday, "and let that be the last of you. You'ee dies charged." It was therefore, with great sur- prise that the manufacturer saw the boy at work in his former place on Monday Morning. "What are you doing in this shop?" demanded the manufacturer angrily. "I discharged you Saturday!" i1Yes, field the boy, "anal don't you de it again. When I told my mother she licked pie," Ilow many, ninny homes there are from which gaiety has been banielied1 not by sorrow but by grievaneoe and of replafnta! r,. Hops as Vegetable. Hops, Which are not recognizable in the form wo prefer, were eaten for themselves as n vegetable by the Romans of old, and still are by the Bava ans, Who choose, rather than tlio htoseoms, the tender top shoots of the plant, and prepare theta in tnucli the form of au asparagus .Yllad. •