HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Brussels Post, 1905-10-5, Page 6•
RETORTS OF SOVEREIGNS
'H'.' 'X' CAN TAKE AS WELL AS
MAKE JOKES,
Many 'Columns Might Be Pilled
With $anrples of Royal
Wit,
The Kaiser's latest joke, which is
going the round of the l'iuropeen
. papers, is by no mane a bad speci-
men of ltoypl humor. When the Ger-
man emperor was visiting• the a,-
Mont Castle of Eaulburg a few
weeks ago with Dr. Lucanus, chief c
131e Majesty's Civil Cabinet, as cure
Panton, be was shown seine pottc:,
recently dug up, which dated fro
Roman times, By an odd coinci cue
the name of the maker of one of the
old vases was deciphered as "LUeart-
us," "halloo! Luianus," exclai;
ed the Kaiser, as tate name cough
his eye, "how is this? You aro al
ways boasting about your ancestors
and here I Bed they,werc only pot
bers after all,"
This story reminds ono curiously
of James I,'s joke at the expense 0.1
one of his courtiers. When he over-
heard this gentleman, a member of
the ancient family of Lumley, boast
of his long and distinguished de-
scent, James broke in with, "Stop
man! You need not say a word morew
NoI know that Adam's name wet
Lumley ."
Much more rare, and perhaps mono
Imtertesting are the stories of jokes
mado
AT THE EXPENSE OF KINGS.
''An excellent example of a clever re-
tort was that of the Attache of th
British Embassy in St. Petersburg.who, when dining at the Imperial
Palace quite recently, had the nits
fortune to upset his glass of claret
The Czar, seemingly annoyed b ed
the incident, asked front the uct
end of the table, "Do they do tha
kind of thing in England?" t'Ote
yes," came the prompt and darin
retort; "but no notice is ever take
of it."
Equally swift and even more dor
Mg still was the rebuke once admin-
istered to the Prince Regent. When
George was walking in Portsmouth
ane day he shouted out to one o
his boon companions whom he saw
across the road, "Hallos, Towers!
I hear you are the greatest black
guard in Portsmouth." "I hope,'
shouted back Towers. with a pro
bond obeisance, "your Royal High
Rees has not come here to -take away
ray character." This answer is oddly
'eminiscent of another of which the
Merry Monarch was the victim. Meet
leg Lord Shaftesbury, whose charec
ter as a libertine was uotorlees
Charles greeted him. "I believe then
art the wickedest fellow in my Pio
minions." "For a subject, sir,'
placidly answered Shaftesbury,
"I REALLY BELIEVE I AM."
When Frederick the Great, after
appointing a man of European 111 -
tame as his Ambassador to the Bri-
tish Court, asked Hugh Elliott what
his fellow -countrymen thought of
him, Elliott answered with a bow,
"A worthy representative of yearh, AO But surso King was
ever so cleverly alio crushingly an-
swered as George III., when he as'a
ed Horne Tooke if he ever played
cards. "Your elajesty," said Tooke.
' 1 cannot tell a king from a knave,"
When William IV. was heir -
presumptive to the throne of Ens -
land, he said one day to the Secretary
to the Admiralty, who was his neigh-
bor at the dinner -table, "C--, when
I am King you shall not be Admiral-
ty Secretary, 1 promise you. Eh?
What do you say to that?" ":111
that I can say in such a case," said
C—, "is, 'God save the King.'"
Charles 11,,who could take a joke
as well as make one, once asked his
chaplain, Dr. Stillingfleet, "How is
it• that you always road your ser-
mons before me, when I understand
you can preach eloquently enough
without a book elsewhere?" The (Ma-
ter answered- that he was so over-
whelmed by His Majesty's presence
that he could not "trust lrim'ielf
otherwise"; "and," continued he,
in return will your Majesty give me
leave to ask why you read your
speeches when you can have no such
excuse?"
That high -placed dignitaries ha 'e
no monopoly of these crushing re-
torts to Royalty is proved by
THE'FOLLOWING STORIES.
STANDS SEA
CEI4IGIiT
Michigan's Insurano
Find Only Good to
e Commissioner Can
Say of Canada Leer
Lansing, Mich., September 27.—
The Michigan Insurence De-
partment has completed an fee -mel-
d gallon of the Canada Life Assurance_ Co„ and reports its all'airs as bring
in a meet satisfactory condition.
'm The examiners' official Statement
e says that "the company is most
conservative and careful in regard to
its Investments." and that. there has
n- been "no attempt in any way to fi-
t Hate the. assets," The Canada Life's
- business is further referred to as
being on a stronger reserve basis
- than that of any other company in
America lcnown to the examiners.
The Department is able to report
"with no hesitation that the Can-
ada Life Assurance Company has no
improper or unprofitable financial
relations or alliances with any other
institution, and all its affairs seem
' to be conducted on a purely busi-
• ness basis. Its officers, in our opin-
s ion, make the best terms possible.
for, and in the interests of, the
Company, The banking business of
the Company is transacted with
several of the leading Banks of
Canada, preference being given to
those banks giving the Company the
5 - best terms."
Special mention is made of the
policyholders' defined rights in the
- 'Company's profits, as follows: "By
• the Company's Charter it is provid-
Y that 90 per cent. of the profits of
the Company shall go to the
Policyholders, and no more than 10
per cent, of the profits to the
to Stockholders. Until 500 is earned
for the Policyholders the Stockhold-
era could not receive 510 Dividcnnct.
The Company has thus established a
community of interest between the
Policyholder and the Stockholder,
and has combined the adv-nutnges of
security and continuity of ruantige-
ment inherent in a Stoek Company
with the most desirable privileges al
a Mutual Company."
Reference is made also to the
Company's voluntary action in
1890 when It requested the. 0oeern-
ment so to amend its Charter that
Policyholders should be allowed to
elect six of their number to sit on
the Board of Directors. The Exam-
iners state: "So fat' as we know.
the Canada Life was the first purely
Stock Company to give Pollcyhold-
ers a voice in the management, and
it has in this manner succeeded in
securing a harmonious blending of
the rights of Policyholders and
Stockholders. In our opinion this
arrangement is a most equitable
ono."
The report is likely to be regarded
as especially reassuring because it
comes from Insurance Commissioner,
Hon. J. V. Barry, who has a con-
tinental reputation as an impartial
official. A year ago he was given
the distinction of being Chairman of
the Convention of State Insurance
Commissioners. Of late the press
of other stales, where the insurance
departments are less effie!ent than
Michigan's, has been advocating?
Mr. Berry's appointment as Nation-
al Supervisor of Insurance, should
the United Stales Congress establish
a Federal InsuraliCc Department.
JAPAN'S GREAT FISI3ERIES.
Japan leads the world in the econ-
f omteal and sc!entilic development of
its fisheries. It has more perscus eu-
gag-ed in this industry, says lar,
- M Smith, than any other nation.
Sharks are among the commonest
food fishes of Japan. They are sent
- to the markets to be "butchered
'Iike beeves in other countries. The
extent of the Japanese Bs' ei•ics me
be judged from the size 01 the nets
employed by the fishermen. Doctor
- Smith tells, in the National Geogrtt c-
hic Magazine, of a net employed for
t catching yellowtails which was more
than a mile long. It had a hag 900
feet long, 250 feet wide at its
mouth, and 125 feet deep. On one
i occasion 10,000 fish, averaging 20
pounds in weight, were taken at a
single haul.
When Frederick the Great's coachmen
once had the misfortune to upset the
Royal - carriage with his master ie
it, and Frederick began to swear
like a trooper at the clumsiness of
his servant, the latter turned his
abuse to laughter by turning round
on the Emperor and coolly asking,
"And you, did you never lose a bat-
Lle?"
Ono day Louis XI. wandered into
the kitchen of an inn at which he hall
stopped for a areal, and seeing a lad
there turning a spit asked him his
name and employment. "My name
is Ilerringer," answered the tturnspit,
"and though I am not a greet man
I get as much as the King of
Frnace." "Anel what," intone:id
Louis, "does the Ring of France
get?" "His wages," was the answer
'which be holds from God, and 1
'hold mine from the Ring."
And to give one more story—at the
expense ol Charles II', One clay he
accosted one of his .servants, called
lCinlgrew, and asked whither he was
hastening so fust. "I am going 101
the lower regions, came the aeswer,
"to ask them to send back Oliver
thernerell to take charge of the at -
Mire of l';nglend; for, as to his suc-
cessor, be is always employed on
other business.,,
MiJNICTPAL NEWSPAPER,
Dresden, Germany, Is ono of the
few cities poSsoseing a 3nunicipni
hem:paper, and this Was beejueat.heci
to the city by the lelo Dr. (hunt,
Vele bocpiest is a very valeable pro-
. Knee and consists of a daily uews-
eaper, which, fit Consequence of its
kettoneiva oircttlation, is the princi-
pal ativertisin medium in the
neighborhood. The profits aro ap-
elied to the beautifying and int-
erove>rlent of the city and to there
sty,
4
DEADLY ANAEMIA.
Leads to Consumption Unless
Promptly Cured.
Many a young life might be enema
from consumption if simple anaemia,
were promptly treated. Anaemia is
the doctors' name for weak, watery
blood. When the blood is in this
condition the lungs have no
strength. The whole system begins
to break. down. Then the growing
girl slips slowly into decline, vutil
at last the cough starts and her
doom. is sealed. I)r. Williams' Pink
Pills can cure ell weak, anaemic
people without doubt or clifficulty.
They actually make new, rich,
health -•giving blood—they euro anae-
inia and prevent consumption, This
has been proved in thousands of
cases. Mrs. Edward Cochran, Mer-
riton, Ont., says:—"Dr, Williams'
Pini: Pills cured my clanghter Ma-
tilda, when 1 felt that her case was
almost hopeless. leor more that a
year she was a sulfea•or from anae-
mia. She gradually grew weak, was
subject to violent headache, and
dare circles appeared under her eyes.
She was melancholy, bat} no appe-
tite and complained of being con-
stantly tired. At clitierent tittles
she was treated by two doctors, but
with no improvement, As her case
progressed, she was attacked by vio-
lent palpitation of the heart, and a
suffocating shortness of"irl'eatit, She
had a deathly pallor, took cold
easily, and continued to decline in
weight, until I felt that she was
in a hopeless decline. At this time
my attention was called to Dr. Wil-
liams' Pink Pins, and 1 began giv-
ing therm to her. She had not been
taking the pills many weeks when
her appetite was greatly unproved,
and this was the first sign that they
were helping. her, She continued the
pins unfit she had taken eight or
nine boxes, when she was again the
picture of healthy girlhood. Every
symptom of her trouble had disap-
peered, she has increased in weight,
and is strong and robust.. I3er re
covel;y is looked- upon as marvellous,
for the doctors thought her case
hopeless."
Dr. Williams' Pink Pills wit/ cure
any case of bloodlessness just as
surely as they cured this case. TIte
pale, anaemic need only rine. thing—
new blood. Dr, Williams' Pink Pills
do only ono thing—they make now,
rich, litre -giving blood. That is why
Dr. Williams' Pint. Pills care all
common diseases tike anaemia, head-
aehes nand backaches. indigeslion,
kielney trouble, palpitation of the
bee rl, neuralgia, nem nue trembles,
a,r1 those speciai ailments that
make tha lives of so many growing
gins and women tnis'rahlt'. lie carr- te
w
_nt to get the g neine pills with Mefull rune 1/r. Williams' Pink Pills ,1•1,",
for halo People. on the wrapper I)
Groin d each box. If in doubt , send st
direct to The Itr, Wililenra' Medltino
in
4.4
T regiefel. g'.F.y.•g,.e'T':'T T TTTat',fel
THE: GREATEST ITEALTtI PAC
TOit--W'OIRK.. •
HEALTH
H LT
might be formulated in the following,
w•sy: First, do not use the eyes in a
poor or flickering IIgltt, `second, do
not have the light directly in Irrupt
or behind; the light should fall,
without ittt.et'ruptinn, lion one side.
Third, do not use the eyes 1111101
When you pre tired 01' when reem en-
ing from an illness, fourth, do not
use the eyes when they become wa-
tery or dhow sigma of lndistiuetness
of vision, 1•"ifth, c% not work with
the head beta over. This tends to
gorge the vessels of the eyes with
bloocl and to produce congestion.
Sixth, do not rend lying flirt on the
hack or reclining unless the book is
supported int the armor relative angle
and position tis when erect. hetetnth
do not remail a single day without
glasses after you should put them
on.
CURE OTe CR01(1',
When a child has an acute attack
of croup, make a poultice of littseeel
meal and mustard, rub a little oil or
lard on top, then putit right round
the child's .neck, Give the cbild a
good dose of castor oil, enough to
)make it sick. Many a child's life is
saved through this. when there is no
doctor at hand. If mothers would
make a small chert.-,'es.•rver of red
flannel the shape cif a heart back
and front, and twive u week put a
few drops of turpentine on it, it
would prevent many a sore throat
and chest complaint.
TO CURE A STY.
The best thing is to bathe the
eyes frequently with warns water,
beracie lotion (5grs. to los. of wa-
ter), and apply at night a piece of
boracic Iiut wrung out of boiling
water; cover with a piece of jaconet
and a pad of cotton -wool on top;
fix with a bandage.
IIEAT FOR EARACHE.
Earache is one of the most dis-
tressing ailments of childhood. Heat,
perhaps, gives as niucll as any ap-
plication. The ear Wray be gently
filled with water es hot as can be
borne, poured in with a teaspoon.
The child should lie with the aa'ected
ear uppermost, and after a short
three turn on that side and let the
water run out. Sometimes a small
mustard plaster behind the mu. stops
S' the pain. It should be left on only
a few minutes.
• EEOlii) COUGI( REMEDY.
Cover 2 oes. flaxseed with 1 qt.
d boiling water, add -'- sugar, 1 pint
strained honey and juice of 8 lemons,
Let it heat on back of range until
1 sugar and honey are well dissolved,
then put in a fruit can. This may
be taken freely in case of cold or
grip until the cough is relieved.
Congenial work with mind an
hands should be encouraged in al
persons, for its prophylactic as wel
as its curative influences. Rest wit
prove serviceable doubtless in noun
bers of cases, but its appiicatior
should bo restricted and careful'
studied. There are many condition
where absolute rest will not oil
prove -useless, but really harmful, '1
send a man from an active busitnes
y
y
0
5
life to one of complete itnactivity will
often prove disastrous, as much so
as to proscribe all -food for the
obese.
The nervous will complain tha
they do not feel like work. If lei
to themselves and told to do abso-
lutely nothing, not:even to react, they
are sure to dwell upon their infirmi-
ties, and grow thereby morose and
hypochondriacal, thus increasing
their invalidism. The desire • for
work should he encouraged in all con-
ditions, and in ell classes. if one's
interest is aroused, even to a slight
degree, a continuance in the work
will develop a desire for occupation.
One will never foel like work If 001e
has nothing to, do. Work will oftct
accomplish what medicine, howeve
properly applied, will not, for it i
not alone that we must earn out
bread by the sweat of the brow, but
every ratan and woman should work
for the pleasure of it, as well as for
the health -giving, brain -expanding
results, and the benefit of example.
h:AT TO SAVE DOCTOR'S BILLS.
TRIED ALL ELSE
TO NO BENEFIT
t THEN DODD'S KIDNEY PILLS
CURED HIS DIABETES.
Startling Case of Thos, Harrison,
of St. Mary's Perry—He Tells the
Story Himself,a
5t. M;y's Ferry, York County,
N, 11„ Sept. 25—(Special).— That
Docid's Kidney Pins will cure Tia -
11 betes, one of the most deadly forums
of Kidney Disease, has been satis-
factorily proved by Mr. Thos, liar-
, rison, of this place. Speaking of his
cure Mr. Harrison says:
"I began to sutler with severe
pains above the region of the Kid-
neys. When I lay clown ft was tor-
ture to get up again. My appetite
foiled and I lost flesh rapidly.
"I doctored with several physici-
ans, but it was all no use Shortly
after this I began to urinate blood
and then I knew 1 was in the grip
of that dread monster, Diabetes.
"At this time a friend prevailod
of pro to try a box of Ilodd's Kid-
ney Pills and they did me so much
good I continued the treatment till
I had used three boxes. They cured
mo completely,"
3f people would study the various'
vegetables, fruits, etc„ as to their
medicinal qualities in adjusting ail-
ments, there woulcl be less demand
for the doctor's services. It should
not bo diff/cult to remember that:
Fruits and acid vegetables (toma-
toes are good for the liver.
Lettuce and celery are good nerve
tonics.
Beans, pests, lentils, etc., produce
strength and heat, and are a good
substitute for meats in winter,
Onions and radishes are pr•oventives
of colds.
Eggs are easier to digest when
slightly boiled than when eaten
raw.
Macaroni end vermicelli, on ac-
count of their closeness of grain, are
not as easily digested as light bread.
Potatoes, When mealy, are easily
digested. When close and watery
they ore hard to digest.
Bananas, on account of the amount
of nitrogen they contain, are easily
digested.
The enders,' front dyspepsia should
take turnips, spinach, tresses, salads,
celery, lettuce, and dandelions.
A person suffering from chronic
rheumatism should avoid dried fish.
SHUN THE "BLUES:"
"Blues" are unnecessary. They
mean one of two things—an un-
healthy body or a diseased mind. In
either ease distraction is the best
retancly. Ono must strive to forget'
self in work, in reacileg, or in pleas
um. A busy life, judiciously arrange
ad, will crowd vapours to the wall.
Theo ere women who never. seen to
Jtava any resources. Let then, culti-
vate a good-sized feminine acquaint-
ance, with varied types to' suit one's
moods, to sew with this one; shop
with that one, entertain and be an-
te alt ed. There 0 always charity
ork to 1!11 in: one's time, ever when
to socitti amenities aro not pleasing.
he best erre for loneliness is a
'telt walk through the clear sun -
tine and pure air. It generally pats
person into a. reasonable frame of
Ind, lint is often avoided by sick
indeal people,
Brockville, Ont„ and the pills
wiil be sent by mail at 50 tents a
box, or six boxes for 52.50,
In 1798 the steamboat WAS first
conceived by Robert Fulton, an Amy
erican.
CAPE OF Till" 38V1'1S,
Thele are 'certain rules ,with regard
to the eau'c (>1 the eyesight whish
Should be religiously fellowocl, 'q'isiy
FUEL IN YUKON.
Coal Being Mined—Some Steamers
Are Using Oil.
Fifteen men are employed this
summer lit the Tantalize coal mine,
on the Upper Yukon Riser, says the
Dawson News. Several of the White
Pass steamers are using the coal,
and are doing well with it, Miller,
the owner of the Tantalus coal pro-
perty, promises to realize a good
thing out of it,
The White Pass, notwithstanding,
it is butting coal to some extort,
has .112' wood camps along the river
between Dawson and White Hose,
An average of two men aro engaged
at each camp. This ntiatlS the dis-
tribution of considerable money for
fuel.
The lower river boats are buying
considerable wood also this year,
and wood camps arc scattered along
the entire 1,700 miles from Dawson
'to St, Michael, but are not patron-
ized 50 extensively as in some of the
yeal'a past:
The Northern Cenneerciarl Company
A little Sunlight Soap will dean
cut glass anti other articles until
they shine and sparkle. Sunlight
Soap will wash other things than
clothes. 113
ARCTIC MAIL DELVIERY
F1:VE THOUSAND MILI<;S PIIOM
OTTAWA,
The Settler Now Has His Letters
Regularly Carried to Him
by Dog Teams.
"Fort McPherson Postofllce, Arctic
Circle." The idea of addressing -a
letter in such it way and having' It
delivered by agents of the Postolliee
Department would have been deem -•t1
absurd and impracticable at one
time. To -day it has beeormo an ee-
tablisheci fact. A few years ago
Edmonton was the remotest point ie
the Northwest Territories reached ay
the Canaflian postotfice. Beyond, no
attempt had been made to exte•td
postal facilities. Nevertheless thdre
was a' scattered population through-
out the vast area between Edmonton
and the Arctic rogioes wholly un-
served by the postoffice. Quietly bttt
steadily, however, the postoflice is
embracing this great expanse of ter-
ritory in the postal area and Das,
now in sucessftl operation a post-
office at Port McPherson, a point on
�
tho Mackenzie River not far from
Beaufort Sea, situate in latitude 148
north, distant over 2,000 miles
northerly from Edmonton and nearly
5,000 MILES FROM OTTAWA,
Between Fort McPherson and Ed-
monton the department has bean
gradually establishing other poet-,
offices, but owing to their groat die-
tance from each other has supple -
muted their work by arranging with
tiro couriers to deliver snail matter
to settlers on the way between the
various offices.
Fancy rural delivery in the Arctic
regions! Yet, that is practically whrtt.
is happening. It is less than four,
years since the demele lent inaug'ir-1
atecl its policy of snail Services an,1
postofeces north of Edmonton. It
began by establishing a mail service
between Elntonton and Athabas.a
Landing, a point on the Athabasca,
River about one hundred miles front
the former place. This service hav-
ing been successfelfy carried out, tee
department in the following' year es-
tablished a mail service between
Athabasca Landing and Peace River
Crossing, a distance of some 300
miles; also a service between Peace
River Crossing anis Spirit Rivet', a
distance of 75 miles; also a service
from Peace River Crossing to Fort'
Vermillion, a distance of about 260
miles, to 1008 successful etTo'ts
adopted to reach Fort Chipewyan, a
point on Lake Athabasca, distant tt
400 miles farther north. Apart fr.>.-n
the very great expense involved in
these services, the question was'
whether they could be successfully b
performed throughout the winter. i
The country being without roads of
any kind, and covered with ice and
snow, the only practicable means of h
transportation aro clog teams. But
P1IREE YEARS' EXPERIENCE:
in the shorter' distance between Ed- c
mutton and Port Cltipewyan having
shown the practicability of this sys-
tem, last fall it was determined to a
make the bold attempt to send his s
Majesty's mails throughout the
winter practically as far north as tt
Um Arctic Sea. The experiment cur -1
vied out throughout last winter has
proved successful, and now a pet•nta-1
Hent postotiice is in operation at 1
Port McPherson, served during the
winter by dog teams.
It is impossible for persons 15- t
joying the conveniences supplied in
the old settled parts of Canada to 1
realize the loneliness and solitude off
those citizens in the remote semi -
arctic: regions. To them the arrival r
of a mail is the most exciting' exalt 1
of the year, bringing to them news' t
from the outer world from relatives le
and friends, keeping them in totdlh; el
'e
some extent with thole country' w
and mit.igeting in a degree the has d- t
ships of their lives. (neat as is the;
expense involved to the country, it
will doubtless be cheerfully ace!uleec-
ecl in because of tho pleasure and
satisfaction that it will bring to
those hardy northern settlers who
are thus reminded `that their wan -
try is deeply interested in their wel-
fare, That two gents will defray the
cost of their sending a letter by
this route for thousands of miles is
not ono of the least triumphs of the
day.
00 YOU WANT PURE TEA ?
not mixed with sweepings, dust or refuse, but the
0 CDT1:� ' " T...T�TOar' XsXi.r : "l SSe
carefully selected, manufactured and packed in lead to
PRESERVE THEIR FRES 1.11N SS.
That's why you ,vont
`l eatelaltane ceereliril"a Selfe
STOPS WHISPERING,
The hats worn by Korean state
functionaries have brims of euor-
nrcus dimensions, three fent act'os:-
sometimes, and are requited to be
made of clay. The reason far this
is time some years ego the th, n
ruler of Korea was annoyed at the
habit of whispering' that prevailed at
court, and so fleetded upon, compell-
ing his courtiers to wear hats that
would make it somewhat more MI.
cult to put their beads close together
to exchange confidences,
Mamma (at breakfast table)—You
should always use your napkin,
Georgie. Georgie— I am using It,
tnamma. I've got the dog tied Lo the
leg of the tablet with it,
A Requisite for the panther.—On th
cattle ranges .of the West, where me
and stock are far from doctors an
apothecaries, 1)r. Thomas' t)clectric O
is kept on hand .by the Intelligent as
le
u
11
y made medicine, not only for brute• "1 won't betf" "You're
many human ills, but as altorse and
cattle medicine of surpassing merit. A afraid you'll lose," "No; I'm afraid
horse and eateee rancher will mat- i g mat I'd n'inl'r
tors greatly simplified by rasing this
oil,
YOUR OVERCOATS
nae tadrd Hall, trould look botter'tiyod, 11 no ngam
of 5,55 to 5511 tovn, ttrau direct Montreal, nus 158
DRIVEN AMERICAN DVEIN0 00.
Praotloal livery day tenons on
FARM ACCOUNTS
ror 750. poet paid,
FARM Pus. HOUSE,
Box 425. Chatham, 051.
"But," protected the bridegroom,
during their little quarrel, "you pro-
mised to love, honor and obey me,"
"Maybe I did," replied the bride,
"'but. I had my fingers crossed,"
PLEASE BEAR 1N MIND that what
is called a skin disease may be but a
symptom of bad blood. In that case,
Weaver's ()crate, externally applied,
should bo supplemented with 'Weaver's
tiyt'up, taken daily'
"Well," said his wife, "I'll bet you
a box of cigars." "No," replied the
"1 shook ]rands with Bilklns this
morning. He doesn't seem well.
What's the matter with him?" "I
think IL's ennui." "Heavens! any
wife would worry if she knew. She's
always afraid Ill carry some of
these contagious diseases home to
the children."
Faulty Kidneys.— Rave you backache?
Do you feel drowsy? Lo you' limbs
ice] heavy') Ilat'o you frequent-hoatl-
aclies? 1 -Lave you failing vision? have
you dizzy feeling? Are you depressed?
Is your skin dry? Dave you a tired
feeling? Any . of these signs prove
kidney disease. Experience has proved
that South American Kidney Cure
never lana.—e.
He—" Dicl I ask you to marry me
last night at thio dance?" Sha—
"Good gracious, mol Why?" He—
"Well—ere-you know, I got excited,
and I often do slily things when I'm
like that."
No person alienia go from items wttb-
out a bottle ul 1)r. •1. I). Rollogg's tty-
settcry Cordial In their. possession, as
chump„ of water, eookiugi climate, etc„
frecucn ttY brings of su tamer complaint,
and thole Is uuthingg life, beug r' ly
With a sero remedy nt handl, which often-
times saves grunt suffering and f'oquont-
]y valuable .lives.O%o'dinl has
grained tete .Itself a tvidespreacl repula-
tfaa for afrordiu prompt relief from
all 'uaintet' complaints.
"Fi'bb,RO V1RI" 1S - A GBNTLI9
STIMULANT to the stomach, thereby
aiding digestion. As n tonic for
patients reeovorlug front row's and ell
discasaa . rival.
the vitality, It fa
without a rival. At all drug and gen
-
oral 5(0100,
Mr. Ilcacistall—"That ]corse you
sought yesterday is a vicious -look -
ng animal. Is he kind?" Mr.
Cropper—"Kind? 1 should think so.
Why, when he came out of the stable
o stood upon his hind legs and
tried to embrace me."
Itching, Burning, Creeping,
rawling Skin Diseases relieved in a feta
,bunt's by Agnew's Ointment. Dr.
Agnew's Ointment relieves instantly
and cures Tetter, Salt Rheum, - Scahi
Head, ic:W na, Ulcers, Ilskin. s, and
11 t:ruptinns of the Slctn, la ie
oolhhtg and quieting and acts dice
magic in alt Baby ltum5rs, Irritation
,f the Scarp or .Rasbus shoring teethhtg
hue. 85 cants a box.—'7
She—Before the were married you
old ire that you never stayed out
ate. I-Ie—Did I, clear? She—Yes,
ou did. He --Do you recollect what
he time was that night when I
old you that? She—No, He—Near-
y twelve o'clock.
A Purely Vegetable I•'lll.—Parmoleo's
Vegetable Yids aro oom pounded from
oots, herbs and solid extracts of
Mown virtue in the treatment of liver
anti kito t'hdncomirla•Utts and ioat giving
ono ey e system whathor f
y overwork or deranged through ex -
asses in living, Thev require no
testi-
O al.known
Their nth Ho ho he.iea se
roll known to all those Cahn havv used
beta and the commend std thcrosu bili 10
yapop fico and tin
quest
0f to beneficial Head who are in quest pf a buret{rlut
medicine.
DEVOURED BY BEAR,
Terrible Experiences of Two Broth-
ers in the Tyrol.
A terrible adventure with a boar
11 celebrated oculist oftcred to op-
erate on a bliltd beggar's eyes, and
said, "I'll guarantee to r'esto•e your
sight." "What," exclaimed the beg-
gar, "restore my sight, and so ruin
my business! A pretty notionl Do
you want b deprive me of my live-
lihood?"
now horns nil on most. of its fttattass.l
ens, The oil is brought ft'oia Cali-
fornia.
Coal for the river steamers also is
being produced oe the lower river.
At the Coal Creek mines, below
Forty -mile, and ,teat' Nulato, coat
IS being produced. Another mine is
being opened on Roy Creek, below
lrlagle, A large traction engine, to
be 'need in drawing soar to the riv-
et' baric, was tient' tletvn the river
a few days ago by steamer,
—4
I'/nishing up the windows of a new
house ifs a pante-full proceeding,
"Ifo you think ,ny little boy Joojce
like me?" "5'cts, but be's liable to
oatgreW
has befallen two Hungarian goat -
bards, the brothers Paul and Martin
Dosch, one of whom was killed and
partly devoured by the animal.
The brothers were making their
way in the direction of the Belebit
mountains, one of the most roman-
tically beautiful spots in the Tyrol,
when they cane upon a hinge she-
bear in the aet of devouring a
goat.
The bear, dlstan'bed in her meal,
sprang at the 1nen, ;who ran for
their lives, with the bear be pur-
suit. They finally succeeded in
caballing a largo tree, llndlegan un-
certain refuge in a thick overltaagingj
branch. The boar then sat down on
bar haunches at the foot of the tree.
Shortly after daybreak. Paul, the
elder of the two brothers, probably
overeone with fatigue and terror,
suddenly lost his hold, fell, and was
instantly torn to pieces.
Finally, towards noon, the animal
fell asleep, Martin then silently
slid down from 1110 perch and matte
for Divosolo, where he ware given
refreshment, lire began to roam we.
tiro mouth, and masa•
tack with hitt teotdelr ao on a peasvageaatnt
who waft sitting at a table, VOW,
policerndn weed required to master
him, and , he ' was taken io the
asyltin,
it raving tnanlae,
if your children are troubled with
worms, give them ,tooter Oraves' worm
Exterminator; safe, sure and effectual.
'Ary it, and mark the improvement in
you,. child. —�
Mrs. Littlewit, (proudly)—"Only
just think! Charles has gone to ad-
dress a public gathering." Friend --
"I didn't know he was s, speech-
maker." Mrs. Littlewit—"Nae 1;
but ]re's been called upon to make
a statement before a meeting of his
creditors."
111 titling boots and shoes cause
corns. Holloway's Corn Cure Is the
article to use. oat a bottle at once
and cure your corns.
Throe gas companies be London
consume between thorn 4,000,000
tons of coal par annum.
Wash greasy dishes, pots or pans
ivitln Lover's Dry Soap a powder. It
will remove the grease with the
greatest ease.
Doctor—"You seem to have had
a relapse. Looks like a severe case
of nervous prostration, too.''
Patient (weakly)—''Nothing — no-
thing at all except looking over
your bill."
WE ARE ALL li`AMILTAli with the
deep, hoarse bark, grimly canoe "a
grave -yard tough," 'fake Allen's Lung
Balsam, a remedy for pulmonary trou-
ble, highly r•eommendod even ut the
earlier stages of Consumption,
Hu—"I think every wenntan is en-
titled to be considered man's equal."
She—"Well, if she is willing to bring
herself down to his level, I don't see
why she shouldn't be allowed to
pose as his equal."
Eat what you Itko. — Clive the d1-
festivo organs some work to do. These
unctions need exercise as much as any
part or the human anatomy, but if
they're delicate, give them the aid
that Ur, Von Stan a pineapple Tablets
alTord and you can eat anything that's
wholesome and palatable -60 in a •
box, 35 cants. -13
A very loquacious lady asleecl a
friend what position he would give
her were sho a man. "f'd maim you
superintendent of a deaf and dumb
asylum,,' was the reply. "Why?"
"Iiecause either the inmates would
learn to talk or you to keep silent."
They Never 1Lnew Pal htre, Careful
observation of the effects of ]rarmolce's
Vegetable .Pills his shown that they act
immediately of the diseased organs 01
the system and stimulate them to heal-
thy action. There may be Cases In
which the disease has been long seated
and does not easily yield to medicine,
bet even in such cases these Pills have
been known to hi.' ig relief when all
other so-called remedies have failed
These assertions can be substantiated
by many who have used the Pills,and
medical mon speak highly or their quali-
Qat:, •
A prison visitor rocantly reeked
one of the prisoners how he came to
be there. "Want," was the answer.
"Flow was that, pray?" "Well, I
wanted another man's watch. Pee
wasn't willing I should have it, and,
tho judge wants me to stay here five
year's,"
A Pleasant Duty. — "When I kite '
anything .worthy of recommendation, I
consider it my duty to tell it, says
Rev. 1as. Murdock, of Homburg, Pa.
"Dr. Agnew's Catarrhal Powder has•
curect The of Catarrh of five years
standing. It is oertainly amend in
its ogee,. The first applieati"on bene-
fited mo In ave minutes. 60 ots,"—f)
Polite Tramp—"Will you obl1'gc met
with a little vinegar and a bit of
rag, madam? I've braised my heel."
Laxly of the House—'"I'm very sorry,
but our vit,ega' is all out; wouldn't
e, little rum do as well?" Tramp—
"I don't know, madam, but P11 try
it; wad—or—never mind the rag,"
Cash or Cure
11 slash'. Connumpption Cure hula to cure
your Cold or Cough, you get back all you
paid for it. You are tem 'of a Cure es
the Cash.
if it wasn't a sure cure, this ollet woulcl
not be made.
I Can anything be faker ?
' 11 you hew a Cold, Cough. or any disease
' of the Throat, Lungs or Air Passages, 61,
SHILOH
358
2Sc, per aortia. An dealln gstnrentee"
X00.4 26k, SO--06