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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Brussels Post, 1906-3-1, Page 61 Duty's Call There has been much said and written about the Call of Duty. Verso has even keen written on the subject, if we re- member rightly, But there Is one side of the question which, we believe, has tower received the Consideration that tt. deserves, We refer to the many other things that always raise Leavoices when Duty Take the very first thing P the morn when the alarm clock rings out the cal of Duty. Then it is that the bed says, "1.I0 awhile." Then it is that the pilloev says, "Snug- gle," Then it is that reason says, "You have plenty of time." Then it is that compensation says, "You came to bed so late that you need more rest," And the floor says, "1 am cold to the feet." Poor old Call of Duty! You cat be heard. In a little while Duty is at It again. 11 says "shave.' But the water observes, "I am cold.' And the beard observes, "1 am not eery long.' And the clock observes, "You will be late 11 you stay to shave,' Dear old Call of Duty. Have you the gbost of a show? At the breakfast table Duty says. "You must leave for the office at nnce." Menwhile the coffee coaxes, "There's another cup in the pot." Meanwhile the horse sense 00(LXAS. "Lay good foundation for the day's work." And meanwhile the hot biscuit coaxes, "Here I am. Here 1 am." Patient old Call of Dutyl The odds are too great against you. On the car Duty says, "Get up and give the lady a' seat." To which experience replies, "She won't thank you." And to which ingenuity replies, "Raise your paper in front of your face." And to which indignation replies. "Why doesn't someone else get up and give her a seat? Do you want to be the goat always? You gave your seat to a lady not more than three months ago." And to which hope replies, "She may get off at the next station." Gentle old Call of Dutyl Why don't you raise a muscle? At the office Duty says, "Throw the newspaper into the waste basket and gel to work." But love of knowledge complains, "I must know the news." And curiosity complains, "There may have been a murder." And sporty old instinct complains, "What?" Feeble old Call of Duty! Frog in your throat? . Pretty soon duty says, "There's that account owing to So -and -So. Pay it." But jealousy mutters, "Folks that owe You money don't poy you." And the bill mutters, "1 haven't been owing very long. You are too sensiLive." • And self mutters, "Why should you • worry about it? Let him do the worry - And ease mutters, "leen can pay him to -morrow, can't you?" And the money mutters, "Keep me in your jeans. I like you." Quavering old Call of Dutyl You are lost among the mutter. Presently Duty says, "Finish this task before you go to lunch." But the task remarks, "I can wait. Don't mind me." And your tummy remarks, eI can't tee -wait" And logic remarics, "Where would you he If you didn't eat?" And the fried scallops at the restate. nani shout over, "Coo -eel" Puttering old Call of Duly] Where - /roe art thou,Call of Duty? At the restaurant Duty says, "Now get right back to the once." But health protests, You must have your constitutional." And hygiene protests, "You must Smoke in the open air." And digestion protests, "A walk does you a world of good." And chronology protests, "It will only take a minute or two." And expectation protests, "Perhaps you will meet that pretty little steno- grapher." And eagerness protests, "And maybe thee) Snake eyes at you." Indistinct old Call of Duty! Why don't you enunciate? At 4.30 o'clock Duty says, "You must not go uptown yet, stay and workl" But scorn grumbles, "Like funl" And by -and -large grumbles, "You worked pretty late one night last week." And your head grumbles, "Do you want to give Inc an ache?" And prediction grumbles, "It Moles like rain. You'll get wet through if you don't look out." And that's -so grumbles, "Suppose you were taken sick and died from exposure and overwork, What then?" Whispering eld Call of Duty! You have less chance than a snowball has yomknow-where. lust before dinner Duly says, "Yoli 1riust dine alone to -night. You are spending too much money." But recollection exclaims, She is such a nice girl 1" • And chivalry exclaims, el think she Is expecting you I" And sociability exclaims, "It Is not good for man to dine alone!" And jealousy exclaims, "Someone else will take herr' . Call of Duly. Oh, Call of butyl After dinner Duly says, "Yon /Talk go right home now and write those lettere." But her eyes rry, "Whitt? Lettere?" And the litt1 curls at the back cif ler nock or 'What? Going right homee" And the curves 01 her eyeltithee ery, "What.? You want to leave rm.?' Arid a 35 bill In your /teethe eriert. "You can get awn Heigh; for a (thQty with nee, You won't miss fila 1' won't mind it." Armen& old Call of Duly! How week you !mei After UM show and while yeti min bidding her good-bye, Duty seyn, 01)0)11 you Ides her," BLit User low burning light Whew, «Give her itt good osier And the smile on her face inners, "Give her a loud meek!" An,d her Noev-adave-you-loces hollers, "It's natightyl" And the way in which she stands hol- lers, "And it's Meet And it's nIcer And her rosy Mlle lips holier, "Kiss Inc quick. Kiss me quick!" Cale of Duty, Cali of Duty. Were you never young? • BORNEO CEASES TO EXIST. Britain Adds Another to Iler List. of Oversee Possesses's% The ancient ldngdom from which the great island of Borneo derives its name ceased to exist on Jemmy 1, 1900, anal Great Britain made yet unother addition to iter oversee possessions, for this, of Course, in crude words, is the interpre- tation of the diplomatic announcement that agreement hes been concluded with the Sultan which provides for th,‘ a—mints/tent of a British resident, with powers to control the general adminis- tration of the Stale." The conclusion was one long foregone. There is no commination service in the law of nations, and the white man has been busy removing the Eastern poten- late's landmarks for many years past. Southwestward the British North Bor- neo Company has been pushing 1111 its boundaries rested 011 Brunel Bay, while the territory of Sarawak has been as steadily working to the northeast. Nipped between these two opposing forces, the ultimate fate of Brunel was only a matter of time and, after existing finally as a mere strip of territory on either side of its solitary river, it has at length come to form a part of Greater Brita in. Very different was Brunel in the days when we first herd of it. Varthema touched here in 1505, but only long enough to remark that the people were "Ydolaters of sharp wyt, and maner of lyuyng not greatly to be discern - mended." It Is to Pigatetta, Magellan's friend and comrade, that we owe the first real el:count of the place. Here be was royally entertained by the King, who had numbers of trained elephants and horses, forts with heavy ordnance, gold vessels and spoons, silk embroid- eries, porcelain dishes, and, in share all the adjuncts of a high civilization—a good dee] of it, no doubt, borrowed from the Chinese, whose money was in sole use. These people were Mahommedan Malays, who must have established themselves on the island centuries fore, for the Dayaks were the subject race even in the south, Malay rule ex - lending, nominally at least, throughnut the island. Brunel, like Labuan, which is now to be administered with 11, is rarely visited by travellers, but it is, nevertheless, one of the most remarkable cities of the Far East, being built entirely on piles :n the water, in a lake -like reach of the river, and thus meriting the title, fre- quently conferred upon it, of the Venice of the East. essels anchor in its main streets, and the children can swim al- most before they know how to walk. Its market is not less singulaw—a dense pack of canoes, now dispersing, now swarming like a hive of bees, the occu- oants being nearly all women, wearing hats as big as umbrellas. The busy scene, the incessant shouts of the crowd and the marvellous dexterity of the pad- dling are not likely to be soon forgotten by the spectator. But there Is little in the way of trade In Brunel. Coal, in- deed, there is, and in this respect the British territories in Borneo may some day prove a very useful asset, but other- wise they cannot be said to produce much, except krisses. HUSBAND'S LITTLE TASKS. Be Signed an Agreement at 'Wife's Request. Henry efeFarlane, a well-to-do young man of Orangesinll, Cape Brelen, N. S., has married Bertha MacGregor, a pretty young woman, after signing a contract in which he agrees.— To wash the supper dishes every day except on Sunday. To darn his own socks. To visit his mother-in-law at least aim times a year. To give up smoking. To drink tea instead of coffee. To attend church meetings regularly. To ' wear whiskers (if he can raise them). To kiss his wife before and after every meal except on Sunday. While it might be inferred from this Mrs. McFarlane is boss of the family, she is in no sense one of the so-called "new" women. She says frankly that, as she was attractive enough to marry any available man in this province, she. concluded to lay down a few laws for the man whom she accepted. She does not like to wash dishes, and thinks one-third of the labor should go to the man. She is not averse to darn- ing socks, but believes a man will he more careful of his footwear if he mends the holes therein. Smoking she will not tolerate. As she believes coffee Is harm- ful, she has put that tinder the ban, and has substituted tea, As to whiskers, she says: "A !rawly inarried man is hound ers kiss his wife, and if he does not slum morning and night her complexion 800» will be ruined. Most men shave every other day, hence my husband must grow a beard. After a time men are liable to 110g1ect, their wives unless you can melee them kiss yosr, so I have taken good care et this. There is teething like beginning legit!, and living up to the rules you've laid down." SPARKS COST DEA it, The Prussian Stale tinilwey has just been cast In heavy damages for causes which illustrate the great. (tenger which reels upon reilevely companies whom lines run through densely Wq011041 There have during the pest sum - nem been Nerloiet fermi. fires, and land owners. ra whore the Duke of Sehlesevig- Theetein wee one, took minim ageing the Stele Ilisilway Deportment. alleging 11141 Ih fires been (111110(11 by smirks frerst railway ringines. Tide has allowed, and deranges have been eweirrion the extent of 37e0,000. 4-- • Terre es mem at ilia top for the in who can peels the ether tonne up, 0-1-04-0+0+04-0-$0-e-cafo+0+0-4. *4-0 +04-0±0-4.04-0-a-0+o-lece+o-ie SURE TO LOME 13,eCie. "Do you really keep a oet?" Yes, and 1 can tell you the best way Le do it." "Try to chase it away." HUMOR SO CONSISTENT. Mrs. Stibbubs--1 was cleaning, our sit - ver on Sunday when ?'lem Stvaightlace called on her way home from church. Fortunately, though she clid not lind it out. Nies. Naybor---She's very strict about the Sabbath, isn't she? Mrs, Subbubs—Yes. She apologized for calling upon me on that day, but she thought she just ought to tall me that scandalous story about Mrs. Giddily, TAKING PRIDE DOWN. A young man started in the livery business a few weeks ago, and the first thing he did was to have a sign painted, representing himself bolding a mule by the bridle. He was particularly proud of this sort of business enterprise, and straightway asked of his wife: "Is not that a good likeness 01 1110?" "Yes," she replied, "it 18 a perfect pic- ture 01 you; but who is the fellow hold- ing the bridle?" CRUELTY TO A CONGREGATION. The -minister of a Scottish congrega- tion mentioned in Sir Archibald Gellcie's "neminiecences" neglected to bring the manuscript of his sermon to church one Sunday, and to make time to go home, a mile away, and fetch it. Greatly agitated, he gave out the one hundred and nineteenth Psalm, and as soon as the congregation began to sing the flint of the one hundred and seventy-six verses the minister rushed away to the manse, from which be 1 y and by returned to the church breathless and found the clerk waiting, nervous and uneasy. "How are you getting on?" gasped the minister. "0 sir," said the clerk, "they've got le the end of the eighty-fourth verse, and they're cheepini like wee mice!" The situation was saved, but Merlotti remissness had nearly dune for the pi- ous congregation. 1T WENT WRONG. 'The other day a counsel, engaged in e ease in which property of various de- scriptions was involved, made a long end rambling speech referring to each kind in turn. His monotonous delivery hnd sent nearly everyone to sleep, when he sud. denliy startled them all by abruptly changing his voice as he exclaimed to the judge:— "My lord, I will now address myself to the furniture." "You have been doing that for some nue, I think. Mr. Wells," remarked the judge, sweetliy, amid universal titter- ing. Now there was another judge who beard this anecdote, and thought of stor- ing it up for some future occasion. At the court, souls afterwards, hls opportunity seemed to have artiveil. Ho was trying a case in which the circum- stances were somewhat similar, but Ilse properly Involved was live stock. In due course one of the. counsel said; "My lord. I will now address myself VI the donkey." "You have been doing that for some time was the prompt response, where- upon a regular mar of laughter follow- ed, which highly gratified the judge un - la its true reason dawned on him. BOUND TO HANG SOMEONE. There was once a robber in Cairo who fell from the second Morey of a house he was trying to enter and broke his leg, writes Mr. Charles Dudley \Varner. 110 went to the oath and com- plained, The man's window was bad- ly made and he wanted justice, The cad! said that was reasonable, and lee summoned the owner of the house. The owner confessed that the house was poorly built, but claimed that the car- penter was to blame, and not he, This struck the -cadi es sound logic, and he sent for the carpenter. 'rho charge -is, alas, too true," said the carpenter, "but the masonry was at fault and 1 couldn't fit a good Window!" So the can, impressed with the rem sonableness of We argument, sent for the mason. The mason pleaded guilty,. but explained that n pretty girl in re blue gown had passed the building while he was at work, and that his attention had been diverted from his duty. The cacti thereupon demandoci that the girl should be brought before him, ie true," she said, "Dust .1 am pret- ty, but it's ne Melt of mine. If my gown attracted the meson, the dyer should be ;mistime and. not 11" "Quite true," said the eadl; "send for the dyer." The dyer was theme!, to. the bar. and pleaded gnflly, Then settled R. The ran lolil ilei robber to take the guilty wretch 10.111S 1101100 rine hang him from Ihr doom and the popuhwe rejoiced the juslien had been done. But pretty soon the crowd relmined to the oath's house, complaining that the dyer was too long to banged rts ordered. "Oh, welt." said the min Who by 1.hol, time was Angering from ennui, "go fled a ghat (bey and thing Mint Joae! shell P""$ 1" (K)0I) Krtimiser tI remittry, The oteverest of barristers ocerothtnal. ly limy their innlish when engaged in 1 their favorite °cremation of breaking down an opponent's witneee; 1111,1 this besquently amen in the ease of "hereny" The teethe -Me tamely coned ledevemi 5) ()SUIT 011 a 0001001 le one of the or,,st amusing :(pecinlens of Ilse mega "Now, 1 esti you, ale, inelm. vend, au- thority yoll firr• peepers:a k, N111111' to the mire's age?" "Under whet snirl the ostler, 11 it (3rrogat ve I y "Yen are to reply, and not iri eepeat the ilitestien •put to you.' answer a question afore he's time to turn 11 in his mind." "Nothing can be more simple, sir, than the question put, and I repeat it. Under what authority do you swear to the animal's eget" "The best authority," said the witness, gru illy, "Then why such evasion? Why not slate at once?" "Well, nen, if you must have "Must! I will have 111" thundered the counsel, interrupting the wilnese. "Well, if you must and will have 11," rejoined the oeller, with imperternble gravity, "why. Wen, 1 hod 11 myself from 1110 own mouth!" A simultaneous burst ol laughter rang through Ilia court, during which the non- piussed barrister subsided, and II was with difficulty that the judge could te- slruin risible muscles within judicial decorum. THE FIGHTING CATS. An Electrical Toy That Anybody Can a Make. Here is a simple but amusing experi- ment which utilizes the apparently magic power of electricity. Any boy e girl can reproduce it with materials be eun find in the house. First cut a narrow strip of tinfoil and paste it around a cylindrical lamp china hey, in the middle. Then paste a strip of tee mine from 1)118 end of the chim- ney to within about hall an inch of the band in the middle. Now take a bristle brush, the kind made. to clean lamp chimneys with, and over its bristles wrap a perfectly (try silk handkerchief. Held the chim- ney in your left hand so that your fin - gees do not touch the tinfoil anywhere, and putting the silk -covered brush into the cidinney rub it briskly back and fern. This part of the experiment should be made in the dark,, and if, while rubbing the chimney, you take the brush out now and then, you will see, every lime you do so, a big spark of electricity jump from one piece of tinfoil to the other. 11 other words, the friction made by the rubbing has turned the lamp -chim- ney into an electrical machine, Now for the fighlen' cats, an elabora- tion of this appartusl Wrap a piece ,.1 iron or brass wire around the middle band of tinfoil, letting one end hang down five or six inches. To this end at- tach one or more strips of cigarette pa- per in a bunch, having previously cut the papers to the shape of cats. Now put the brush into the chimney at the opposite end to that used at first and 11111 it briskly. The electricity thus gen- erated will go into the strips of paper, and make nem stand out from each other as if they were alive and were struggling to get as far apart as pos- sible. These experiments are best made in perfectly dry weather, and it is well also la warm both chimney and handker- chief at the fire. NORWEGIAN MOSQUITOES, They Dave Them In Millions in the North Countvy. Hunters lind the mosquitoes a terrible pest in parts of northern Scandinavia. One writes : "The warmth of the sun is rousing our deadly enemies, the mosqui- toes, into active warfare. Attacked as we are hy a few score of viciously pip- ing skirmishers from the mighty host, we have, before advancing, to look to the joints of our harness and don our gauntlets; then in descending the long slope toward our bivouac the scores of the foe are gradually multiplied to hun- dreds, the hundreds to thousands, the thousands to myriads, till We are at length enveloped in a dense cloud of winged Rends, The horses are a dis- tressing sight. From nose to tall, from hoof to wititere, their unfortunate bodies are covered with what might be taken at a casual glance for grey blanket clothing, but which is really a textile mass of seething insect life, so closely set that you could not anywhere put the point of your finger on the bare hide. "For such small creatures mosquitoes exhibit an astonishing amount of char- acter and diabolical intelligence. They dash through smoke, creep under veil or wristband like a ferret into a rabbit hole, and when they can neither dash nor creep will bide their time with ille cunning of a red Indian. We wore stout dogsain gloves, articles with which they could have had no previous acquein- lance, and yet they would follow each other by hundreds in single file up and down the seams trying every stash, in the hope of detecting a flaw.' HAVE TuitiOn CHRISTMASES. Celebration of 111(1 1)115/ Occurs Three Times in Holy Land. That "Chrlsinans comes but once 11 year is not a correct statement to make in Bethlehem of the Holy Lend, for it mines three times, officially and cede - elastically, authorized by the usnges of centuries. The first Christmas, which falls on the 25t11 of Deeember, is cele. hreled by the Latins and Proteetants, This date words with. the calendar ns reformed by Pope Gregory XIII, in 1552 A. D. The Latin or Western Chrisliau Church is nut, mid never has been, known by the name of Roman Catholic to the natives of either Palestine, Syria or Egypt, but always as the "Lathe Church. But what in Europe: aml Aineriest be known as 1110 Greek Orthodox, or Ilusso- Greek Communion, the Eastern Chris- tian Church, has always. and still is:, fined "Rounno," or ithinitn, by the 210 - Ova population, sto 01g0 Of11011111y by the Ottoman Governineet, 11 being the 00in- Winkel reetognized by the Moslem: when they conquered tint Byeantine provinces. The "Ilnumee" or Greek Orthodox Clewed! 81111 1011101V 10 '1110 Julian calen- dar adjusted In Julien Cam's). 40 13.0.. tvhih eount the 15511 of December falIa on our 01.1) of January, celebrated by up as Epiphany mei "011 Chreamns." The Arreenisin Caswell bile also e different conleslastical calendar, which brings ils Christmas lat tie! Pith of iunuary, MOVEMENT. The distributive encietiett in England in the conaneneement nf 1905 numberod 1,409 wttb 11 turesibershlp of 2,078,1 78, /Theme Naive menthe ihey did 8 NM- itIsh of Wei:Alin:It. o11 wi»el, a nt.001 nt "1 doesn't Me -gilder 1111411.;• 10 elleteletie 1.(1101110A 1J )tilISIQSI, RUSSIAN STATE PRISONS SUFFERINGS IN THE OVERCIIOWD(1I) CELLS AT KIEFE. An Escaped Student Tells of Ills Four Weeks' Experience Within Its Walls, Some idea of the terrible overcrowding in the Russian prisons at the present moment has been given to a St. Joyless Gazette representative by u Russian stu. dont who, wevious to his night to Lan- don, where he arrived (recently, litul spent four long weeks within the walls 01 1110 State prison at Kleff, "At about 2 o'clock in the morning on December t5," he said, "I was suddenly awakened by a number of policemen and secret agents forcing their way into my bedroom. Without being given time even to dress 1 was hurried out Into the bitter night alr. On my way to the pri- son 1 saw several batches or prisoners f"orn all parts of the town going in she same direction, escorted by mounted police and Cossacks. "1 ma forty odd prisoners who made up the policemen's bag for the night com- prised men and women of every age, all shivering M the keen, frosty air, and also a few boys and girls from about 12 to 14 years of age. "When all the police forays had given no their parties of victims wo were driven at 5 o'clock in the morning into a cell about 10 feet by 15 feet, which was already ocoupied by numbers of prison- ers lying on the floor pelimell. Their reception consisted in ' AN OUTBURST OF CURSES, because we came to rob them of what little space and comfort they had al- ready. "Obeying Use orders of the gendarmes on duty, we tried to lie down, one beside another. There was. not space enough for all of us to do so, though we were packed together like sardines. Sleep was out of the question, bemuse oe the cries of the women and children. "In the morning the door was opened, and some soldiers with whips in their hands forced their way behind the pri- senors and drove us to the bathroom. Our way lay between two rows of sol- diers, who rained blows in every direr: - lion. This was repeated on our way back. "By this time the women and children were screaming with pain, while we MU! clutched our teeth in the determination to seize the flest opportunity of getting our own back. Some time later break- fast was brought in—bread and water— but only enough for the first fifty-two prisoners. Dinner, which consisted uf cabbages in a putrefying condition, was only served out to them. "Protests were rewarded with blows, no speakers being dragged out of the cell and cruelly knouted. Al supper time we received at last some water to quench our burning thirst. No food for us, the second batch of prisoners, till the second day, and then only a meagre allowance, of execrable quality. "Every morning we had to run the gauntlet, and if any noise was miede day or night the prisoners nearest the door, whether innocent or not, were draggee out and 'usually came back with their SHOULDERS TORN OPEN. "Our sufferings increased day hy day as we fell, more and more the lack of fresh air and the want of rest. A num- ber ol the women and five of the chil- dren fell 111, but of course were not re- move(1 from the cell. Their continual 'cries of digress nearly drove us mud, but there was no way out of it, the pri- soners being practically surrounded by soldiers. "The same hideous state of affairs pre- vailed in all the numerous cells of the building, from the roof down to ihe dungeons. 'On New Year's Day eianuary 13). when our suffering 'had bMoine unborn, able, we broke open the door of our cell while most of the guards were away prisymg for the Czar in the prison cha- pel. Rushing out, into the corridors, we began to sing the Wiarseillaisee About twenty of us managed to overpower the sentries and make good 0111! escape into the'surs treet8O 'Osortie was only partially suc- cessful. An alarm was quickly raised and several of iDe fugitives were either shot down or reeriptured. Fortunately for me in the, general turmoil I managed to escape Lo the house of a friend et rnine. The some night he helped me to leave the town in disguises, and after some diMeulties and with the assistance of a few bribes I at last was enabled to cross the frontier." ARISTOCRATIC REFUGEES, Russian Countess is a Milliner, Baron- ess Teaches Languages, it is estimated that 10,000 incisions of all ages and ranks have taken refuge in Switzerland during the last .year, 115 ti result of lite unsettled state of affairs in Limit- own country. Among them are members of the Rus- sian aristocracy, who have lost their fortunes dialing the strikes. end are now obliged to work for their living. 1-1 (leave there is a Countess wile is employed as a milliner, while at Zurich a Baroness Is teaching languages to support herself and her Iwo children. A Russian Count is offering his se.rytees at Basle, through the medium of adver- tisement as a private secretary, Several penniless Polish nobles and their bunnies are Id present staying with Paderowski, 11)(3 famous pianist, at N10111t'S.. There are also inany llusstan children et schools in Switzerland who have been sent away from the seat of revolution. PINGI,ISli IAMB. While English jams have a kirge and enthusiastic followilig the World ('ver, 0)1(of f;r1Vittlirillslg15 eil c(ol °isle) i in. ling the base oi ninny' of these sweets 1113' prepared and shipped lo England In bulk, wham they are nompounded. Among the rontrihnlions of F1111100 In eespeeeetes, 51801>111, plums and 01)01103'particular are black currants, derrios, smell trolls, Time Is 111(11 '5/, buf Ws ',Him' to to in a emery than }mem. MATRIMONIAL VENTURES! SLIPS BETWEEN THE iliAlfillIA.GE CUP AND LIP, 1111.100. 11 Bride and riled a Spinster— Strange Vaearias al Beide and Bridegroom. Cupid has seldom treated ono of his tielinis guile so scurvily Miss Kalb mine Brett, of Allentown, Pennsylvania whom be has twice 1 urtril to the ail ar on ly to turn Ills Impartment bele back On her, Two years ago Miss Brett wns W000 and won by tth nem Ryan; the happy day wes fixed, and ihe bride, in all het nuptial finery, wits al. the Meech with her bridesouside and frionde. But, elm for lite cup of happiness hold so tnnta- lizingly lo her lips, the bridegroom never appeared, Mr the sufficient rea- son that his mothee. who objected to the marriage, had partied him safely off into Um country under an effective es - cove Only a few woes ago Miss liven, having in a weak moment. taken Cupid into favor again, once 111011) donned i101' bridal gown and was awaiting her fu- ture lord at the church, when a letter from him was handed to her, confessing that he had a wife already end was thus not in a position to wed again. 13u1 feate was still more unkind to a Miss Dora 0—, who died a few years ago in the North of England at the ad- vanced ago of ninety-eight. In the defli of het' youth and beauty Miss 0— hal been on the very brink of wifehood no fewer than three thnes, and yet SHE DIED A SPINSTER. Her first matrimonial venture was at the immature age of sixteen, when she eloped with the son of a neighboring squire, only to be overtaken by her father at Carlisle and carried home again in tears and disgrace; on the second occasion her husband -to -be wits thrown from his horse and killed on his Way to the church; while her third lover chose the day arranged for his nuptials to elope with the pretty daughter of local publican, the news of his treach- ery reaching Miss D0111 NA as she was stopping into the carriage which was to take her to church. Miss survived this last painful experience three-quate tees of a century, a fact which may, 01. may not, be taken as evidence that jilted girls live long. There are 11)505/ men who, for some obscure reason, would rather face 101 enemy's guns than the ceremony which ought to crown them with happiness: but, happily, law allow their apprehen. sion to affect them so seriously as Herr Sormetnann, of Sandbag, in Germany. who was so towelled at the prospect of marriage that he committed suicide on his wedding movnIng; or as Mr. Henry 0—, who, as the newspaper. recorded recently, had to be dragged to the church, even after he had been foliated by TWO GLASSES OF BRANDY, The excitement which, perhaps natur- ally, precedes a wedding is responsible for many strange vagaries on the pari of bride and bridegroom. ft Is only e few weeks since the preparations 101' wedding near Birmingliain were all complete, when 11 was found that the bride was inissing. She had gone out to purchase a pair of gloves, and from that lime no trace 05 1181' could be dis- covered. The pollee were informed, the country for many miles around was scoured; but it was not smell the follow- ing day that a police superintendent while driving overlook a woman, al- most dropping' from fatigue who proved to be the missing bride. She had spent the whole of Saturday night wandering about the lanes, and when rescued could give no explanation of her movements. More amusing was Ilse misadventure which befell a bride recently in a Berle. shire town. Owing to a lapse el 10001- ory a liveryman neglected to fetch the bride, and the bridegroom and Mends were leapt in suspense at the church for over half an home A messenger was dispatched to the livery Stable and the eeenrieLor admitted his laxity, but wben told to proceed with haste to fetch the bride he naively replied, "What'll be the use of fetchin"er now? The servicell be 'alf over." Ho was soon made to see the absurdity of his statement, and the delayed ceremony was carried out , WITHOUT FURTHER HITCH. The obstacle to a wedding at Wem not long ago proved more formidable. The bride and bridegroom, with their relatives and friends, were ale assembled at the local chapel; the parson was in attendance and the owernony was about to commence, when the registrar made his appearance and, to the general con- sieenation, announced that, as the legal time for which the banns should be publisbed had sell forty-eight imers to run, there could be no wedding khat day, Was there ever a More tantalizing illustration of Inc cup being dashed front the lips? However, the Mow was borne with philosophy and goal humor, ami the whole party found abundant solnce in the Wedding breakfast, to which they 1°10Lll ilicin litetldejctlirrwilich promised to be tragic marked a wedding ceremony I month or so ego at SI, Paul's Church, ?widen, Germany. The clergyman wise just putting the ail -Important question to the bridal pair, when suddenly the bridegroom sank insensibly at (.11e feet of his Intended inede. A wild shriek from the testier alarmed lee whole entree end nearly rimmed a prude. 0 doctor who wits celled to Ibo scene succeeded in reviving the young man, and de- clared that the fainting had been calmed flintily by too tight a miler, Two hours later the marriage was solemnized in the 501110.011111'011 and by the same clergy- man„ --London ONE WAY OP' LOOKING AT rr, A Mee Iiid hurl climbed a very steep spout attached' to his parents' house lo got a nest which had been built by some birds. Ile was euccessful, and was walking away with his companions, when a gen- tictoan, who had watched his danger - ons feat, :Monona him and said: little fellow,' 1 was sorry to Pta you taste your life for such a piney thing. What would have happened it th"O"shiTistitisietIned had givlea, n11'itwo vaYr' ukine have Mattered Mull; Were going to leave the YOUNG FOLKS Once my gClislAndNnTAgnSvePaAriltTIY1,;; ,hlyl but there was lois lo cat! Sand wiches end eillaken salad, Cakes and every kind of sweet, Must have been 0 million waiters— Anyhow, sura of eight; 'Cause moll time 1 sew a new one 1 would have him 1111 my plute. \Vhon they woke me im next morning Twerniell didn't feel just eight; And I didn't want my bvealefust; Guess 1 ate that, too, Met Mehl. GGLIeS. niggles was only a scrubby little In- dian pony. His owner had evldenlly considered him of no use, and had cruelly turned him loose In the bare pi alliS to shift for hlineelf. He was a sorry-looleing Hale fellow, as he steed one morning nt, the gale to Mr. Hudson's large cattle ranch, in Western Kansas, shivering in Use wind, end looking with a wistful gaze at the int ponies inside. Mr. Hudson noticed him and started te drive him away. But his little daugh- lei Lillian said:—"Let him in, papa; he looks so hungry." Mr. Hudson opened the gate and the pony walked in just as If it were his home. Mr. Hudson made inquiries, but no one knew anything ebout him; and as nn owner ever mine to claim him, Lil- lian claimed him as her special proper- ty, and named him Ruggles on account of his long,, tangled mane and tail. • He was a docile little creature, unlike the rest of the ponies on the farm. He soon came to regard Lillian as his mis- tress. She learned to ride him, and could often be seen cantering over the prairies with her father. 13ut Ruggles seemed to consider net she was not much of a rider, for tie would carefully avoid all the dangerous- icoking places and holes in Ilse ground, made by aoyol,es and prairie dngs, which ere very plentiful in 'eVeslern Kansas. When the next spring onnin Haggles -did not look Mee the same 111118 scrub. His rusty brown mat heel n11 crone off, and a new block one lied taken its place. By the next fall the ihe nefghborimed could boast of a public sinned, and when Innen began to go einegies found he lind regular duty every 110,V. Litilan would saddle him and ride 10 the school house, which was Iwo miles away, then tie up his bridle and sen(1 him home. At about half -past three Mr. Hudson would middle him again and send him for Lillian. He always arrived on lime. and if a 111 110 early he would wail patiently by the door until school closed. Some of my readers will remember Ilse blizzard that struck Western Kan - sits in 1 RE, when so many-penpie lost their lives and thousands of reale were frozen to death. The storm eninmenceil about noon and the weather grew sterol- Ily colder, The snow blew so thick and fast that Mrs. Hudson was afraid to niggles In go for Lillian, but Mr. Hudson was sick and there was no I'M 0I50. She went to the barn end n111 the sad- dle on him, and lled plenty of warm wraps on. Then she threw her arms around his shaggy nestientiynhnnIoiled him bo bo and bring 1 He seemed to undersinme atm Alerted out with his shambling trot in Ilse direc- tion of the schoolhouse. One hour mimed slowly In the anxi• ous parents. When Iwn hell passeeL their anxiety was terrible, as they strained their eyes to see ifirongh the blinding snow his shaggy form bringing their dal ling safely home. Ai lest ne came will Millen on his hack. bundled ues from head to foot. The teacher had fastened her on Use twiny and given him tee vele: and so hi had brought her safely nein, none the worse for her ride, except being thoroughly chilled, OLD BRITISH ELECTIONS. Days When Electors Were Kept Under Lock and Key, in by -gone days men w re often un- willing to be made members et the Brie ieh 'louse of Commons. 11 tves•costly, and therefore a difficult position for a poor man, but at the same limo repre- sentatives were not Malty he found anm0 oonn.gutsilineawealle-ctomtdlloit olgissris,h o\‘. 1TschreSheriff rode up to the county come in the four- teenth century. ready to ruminate a candidate. A gay loright, feel -nil of elec- tion, "hastily withers -eve from Ilse crowd at the words 'election' and 'parliament,' and spurroth oft as fest as his good horse may carry him," On the other hand, scene sought election by luty means, rind the first instance of enrrnellon in electioneering matters is snarl In be that of Thomas Long, in 1571'lin. "being found to he a very simple men, end not fit to sorve In that, place. was question - (.e how he came 10 be elerled," Tho "simple man" admitted that he "gave tr, Anthony Garland, mayor of (he town, :13 for his scat in Parliameol." which was ordered to be returned.. though the 8°satt: bwudi8lealletotieillealle'lltedoi mats fne a into Tory election in the west," printed In the Flying Post for 1715 wellness some very significant ilenis coneernig "Folcl- lime English election expenene, or 10(10015 of Ole wird 'Cipirehe 440," le on; "For demolishIng Iwn hostses, MOO," Is another. Othevs wove: "For eelLele°1ragelitto C40," iorbreakng win dows, 2 ," o1n5of 'ttklerniar> n "For a set of isoteelous 11113, This wits not act much 01 11 hurleieme, though, as might be suppnsed. en Um eleetions of 1721, for insInnee. volers or the opposing candidate W0/11 constantly suerotstided by snobs hired for the pup - !Jose, arid out off from liver polling 1101115, while others .wern actually oar. tied off by force and kept muter lock end key until the elcation was over, An Englishman living in Ilely, and fearing an earthquake bn ibe of hie Thome, sent MS two bays to a 'friend in London until the Peen elintlid he over, O few metes after, the father received this letter from his friend' "Plense tenn your boyo iseme, and Band 00 lbe earth- te. 11 1' -