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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Wingham Advance, 1911-09-21, Page 6poLiTics. (3eltimore American.) "I. hear that johnson has divorced hire - self from politics?" "Ilan* merit alimony did be get r me" NEW YORK'S OUAINT SPOTS (Washington Herald.) "There's some qualut eld spots In New Yerk," "So I'm told. Take me througb the Antral= quarter." HISTRIONIC. (ruck,) "I3y some she la considered the lead - big emotional actress of the day.- .",A.M1 she never married, you "A, little, I believe, in the amateur war." LACKING IN RHYTHM. Iladelpide Record.) Elonbs—Seribbler's poetry strikes me as being miter clumsy. Slobbs — Clumsy? Why It positively trips over its own feet. HAPPINESS OF A SAGE. (New York Sun.) Solomon boastee of bin magic carpet. "My wives don't make me wipe my shoes off betore I step on it," he cried, Herein lay its great charm. CORRECTED, (Pude) Tho Artist—Just a little daub of mine, you see. my dear madame. Miss Gush (gushingly) -0, no. You are entirely too modest. 'I should can it oulte a big daub. • *so THE BARE.HEADED FAD. (Pittsburg Gazette -Times.) That revival of the bare -beaded fad in Chicago -was probably caused by some fellow whose straw bat was worn out and who hadn't yet, raised the price of a delay. AT REGULAR RATES. (Peek.) Poet—Yes, I write poetry and you raise hey; we are both proeucers. Fernier—And I reckon we both get about fifteen dollars a ton. HIS MISFORTUNE. - (1'oleaa Blade.) "You got a raise In pay, didn't you?" "Yes, but it Mara do me any good." 'Why not?" "I talk In my sleep, and my wife found out about it." ei • * THIS EXPLAINS IT. (Toledo Blade.) Lady—What! Thirty-eight cents a doz- en for eggs! Why, that's more than three cents for one en. Grocer—Well, mum, you must remem- ber, that one egg is a whole day's work for one hen. ••• ENVY. "I never see that chap doin, anything. Ifairet he got a job?" "Sure: he gita about $t a day for bein' a bridge tender." "Gosh! He's one o' the idle rich, ain't her AND SO WHAT'S THE USE? (Atlanta Constitution.) The editor of the "Leader" reaches the conclusion of the whole matter as •follows: "Get a horse and you will watt a sad- dle, get a saddle and you will want a buggy: get a horse and buggy and you will want an automobile; get an gut0. mobile and you will want forever!" • et - HE CAME BACK. Wife—To be frank with you, if you were to die I should certainly marry again. Husband—I've no objection. I'm not going to worry about the trou- bles. of e, fellow whom 1 shall never know. THE "MARKED" PAPER. (Buffalo Express.) "Been taxing your eyes lately?" asked the oculist. "Yes," said the patient; "1 looked all through a newspaper of 144 pages which came through the mail to me hearing the words 'marked copy,4" "No wonder your eyes smart:" "Oh, but that' &stet the worst or it. I elide% find eenything marked." A DEDUCTION, (Harper's Weeltly,) "Look at that fellow, Gassaway," said melts, "By George, if ever any man was born -with a silver spoon in his mouth he's the one!" "Think so?" said Dubkins. "Now, I should have said, looking at Gassaway's mouth, that it must have been a soup ladle he was born -with." AN EXPERT WITNESS. (Life.) "I must compliment you," says the at- torney for the defence to the patient witness who has endured a whole day's cross-examination by the prosecutor. "The Crown attorney asked you ques- tions that ought to have tangled you all up. but never once did he trap you." "It was easy." smiled the witness. "I am used to getting home late and an- swering my wife's questions." isr 'COMPENSATION. (Hansas City Journal.) "I get my hand stung by a sea nettle," said the young girl* "Terrible; too bad." "It wasn't so had Four young men insisted on holding my hand all at once." ENTERTAINMENT IN THE HOME. ' (Sucress Magazine.) A Louisville barrister eseorted his wife and daughter to e. lecture, o.nd then to his wIfe's annoyanee, disappeared. Ile was on, hand, however, when the meet- ing was over. 'Hello there, 'Tbeodore," said a Weed, meeting the barrister and his Dimity In the street ear, "heel to the lecture?" , The lawyer stJ a leek at his wife's face. "No," he answered; "just going." WANTED REGULAR WORK (Seeress atagazine.) .A. farm band Iota workeit In the field from dawn till darkness, doing the clioreii by lantern light. "I'm going to quite he said to the farmer at the end of the month. "You promised •me a steady "Well, haven't you got orte?" was the eetorrished revise "Noe said the man. "there are three or four hours every night that 1 ilon't have enything to do, and fool my time away sleeping." .* • REFLECTIONS OP A BACHELOR. Clew Torts Press.) 'There'e nobody you ean hate Ilke tee tereic ouzel. Guilt soWS the -wind, 'but innoomme reams part or the whirlwind. The reason a giti Calt believe a man is a hero Is he Isn't her father. The average man expeete to make his hay with other people'e 'mowers mid rake'. Thee* is no greater Mettle worked than the Ivey a Woman ran wear a ehoe two sleets smaller tlum her feet end have it deep Meer* too big for them. LARGE FAMILY. (Chleago Tribune.) The envious pereort hall opened e eon. vereation svith the tet wonute in the side show. "Are your parents living?" he *eked. "Yee, sir." e "Ifevo thee' It loge family?" Sweet Miss Margery "Tor years the grew shower., Then Nature said, "se lovelier flower, Ou earth ivas never seen, This eitild I to myself will tate; She shall be mine, an4 I will make A lady of me own." .And Nature did that, Margery. No rules of mine coula to what she did, You had the gerat within you of all that mitices a grand good women, and It has come to perfection.' Margery bent and kissee the lips that epolte the grateful words. "You always comforted me, dettrest, truest friend! Ale why wilt you not stay with ine always, to be ety eounseler and guide in the years. to eome? You have worked so hard, now is your time for rest. Promise Inc that, when you are tired, you will make your home with will come to you whenever I an; hut I will not live with. you. It would not be wiee. Now tell me of all the strauge things that have happened since we parted. Thank Heaven, my child, your lot has Wien uppn the golden side of life! Yeur troubles are over, now be- gins your ltappineee Mareery's band had wandered to her heart-apel locket, which day and night she always wore. She raised. it, and gazed at the image of her mother's face, "It seems like a fairy -story," she sitid slowly, 9,nd dreamily. "I wonder . does the knowledge that I have so much, that tho babe she left alone in the wide, wide world has great riches and lives in lux, ury make her happy?" "It would make her happier, dear child," Miss Lawson added quietly, "to see that your companion and friend. for life, your husband„ is so good and true a. map. He is well known to me, Mar- gery. You see, my sister has told me all about his nobleness and worth; and worth; and from myheart I congratu- late you—more, I rejoice with yeti." Margery did not nagger; her hand was still closed roundeher locket, her evert were fixed on the fire. The light fliekering and' dancing on her pale love- ly face found no smile there, only a depth th h of pain in the wondrous starlike e CHAPTER XXII. The fortnight's stay of the Crosbie Castle party m town was extended to nearly six weeks; then Stuart eseorted his mother home, and Vane Charteris remained in London. She was now thor- oughly vexed and wearied, In site: of all her scheming, she was no nearer the goal—indeed she began almost to Olear that Stuart would stip through her fin- gers altogether. She grew cross and wor- ried, driving her mother almost frantic by her return to what she called health. The suspense was really telling upon her, and with the birth of fear came strong determination. For her own pride's sake she must win aort — the bitter mortification, the letiinilist- tion of tailure would be too terrible to bear. Had she not tacitly encouraged the idea. that her marriage with the heir of Crosbie Castle 'and Beeclutm Park was a foregone conclusion? Al- ready she had experienced the pleasure of seeing envy and disappointment ga- ther on several of her rivals' faces. What barrier now remained? Stuart had, to all outward appearance, blotted the foolish episode of Margery Date from hie memory—there was no other influeuee to eombat hers. Why then did he not wake to the reality and coniplete her satisfaction? The delay was annoy- :. ineeo the suspense killing.. Stuart. little guessing the workings of Vane's mincl, was recovering grad- ually from the wound that his, heart had received. His rceldessi mood had gone now. and be was once more hie calm, manly self; but the happy bright- ness of his nature was dulled, his light laughter -loving ways had fled ferever. His love for :Margery bad never died; he treasured it now as a beautiful dream, too great a happiness to be real- ized on earth. The first agony Of sur- priee, doubt, and grief over. he grew to judge her as he judged all women now —he thought of her, not as Margery the pure. sweet, !reel) youitg girl, but Margery the worldly, selfish, artificial coquette, of the same nnture as the fashionable butterflies he met in town. His live for her was a thing apart from her memory; he deemed her miwoythy of so great, so trite a feeling; he had worshipped an ideal, and he kept that ideal stilt shrined in his heart. Growing weary of life in Own Stuart Neent• back to the caetle, thankful for the breath of the froilt country air, the rural quiet. He intended to leeve &g- lands to travel MICA again, but his fath- er% worn fare. recalled Sir Douglas Ger- ant's words; and so, with a little sigh, he buried his own wishes, and gave him- self up to minister to the parent who loved him so dearly, end whom he treas- ured In return. To his tnother Stuart was a puzzle. N'ever once was Margery% name on 'his lips, yet his undoubted love for her, as revealed in their one in- terview, had. considerably etartled her. She was surprised at his quietrtees, his anquieseence in her every wish, grew eneaey at his sudden gravity an& the eadnees of Ids face, and alntost wished f or a display or the etrong wilt whieh tor so 'many years she had. depleted. She led made Ise ventark, to Ithn eit the tub- iect, deeming the affair best left in Vanes able lianas. Stuart had lorked the allele letter whielt Sir Douglas had eonfided to his etre among the few treasures he pos. tweed, and he waited, expeeting new% from his cousin every day, but none (wane. At times Stuart grew uneasy; he saw the announeetnent of the arrival of the vessel in which Sir Douglars had selled, and yet his rousin made no sign. All he eould do WAS to wait and We. He turned his ettention to the busi- ness conneete4 with the Wide and es. fates of Crotblit Voile, arid spent long days with the farmers and. laborers, winning their hearts by his warm get. *roue stature, and the interest he took in their welfere. But thie state of 'things displeased Mrs. Croeble beyottd werds, She was an ambitious woman— rehe ilmged to see her on enter the Vorld's list for feine; and to witeh hint graduttily developing into a quiet farm- trevncr was tnore than elm mild hear. reused her pride to think that her eon should bave the whole of his life alter- ,ra through the eentimentat folly of a plelselen romance, and she determined en *peak to hint openly upon the tub. tett ef his career on thr fitst oppor- terity. It wee not about the rnidd4 oINe. *ember, en4 Olsten *As Intly occupied eith alteriv*nd restoring W. cotter demist, in elm end that his mother found the deeirea op- portunity long In coming. At bet, one afternoon, the perceived him striding uP the avenues; and, leaving her bou- doir, she met line in the hall. "Well, mother," said, Stuart, smiling, "not out to -day? You are wise—it le ankle-deep in mud. Don't come near me—I am, not fit to Approaelt you. have come back for am agreement nutde about Culllitun'a ,cottage; must be off directly." "What is your hurry, Stuart?' asked Mrs. Crosble, coldly. 'Ten not you epare sue a few minutes? I have long wanted to speak to you, but really yon are so muck engaged, I have had ne chance." "Of course am ready. mother, if you wish it," Stuart replied, though not resulily; be never care for these brief intervals of eonvereation with his moth- er—they invariably Annoyed, him, 'Come to my baudeir fel' A few min- utes." llo followed Mrs. Crosbie in silence; then, as elle closed the door, he walked to the window and leaned against the ledge. "Well,. mother?" he e•aid, in a tone of impatience. Mrs. Crosble stirred the fire, then warme4 her white hands. She looked at her sou, and the sight of his grave, handsome face strengthened her pur- pose; it -wag such a faint likeness to the merry bright face of a few months back. "Stuart," she began quietly, "I wish to epeak to you seriously. Do you in- tend to lead this kind of life always?" "What kind. of life, mother?" tioe4,11:”Iii raonotonous, farmer -like exietence. Have you no.aiiii—no ambt- "None," Stuart answered, laconically, seaRti.9 mother moved Impatientiy in her "Pray, be sensible, Stuart," she sale, sharply; "you were never like this be. fere. It galls me, it wounds me to see you wasting your days (limn Imre, pot- tering about on the farms, and for what?" "Some one must. look after things, motlier; my father ean not,. and you have often eoniplained to inc. 01 the had management, so I have determined to relieve you of further anxiety. "Paliawi Do I want niy, son to tuen steward? I tow@ to -day .received a let- ter from Lady Be.yeliffe recommending me a manager, and 1 have all but settled to engage him." "Then don't do it," promptly replied Stuart. "He is not wanted*" "He is wanted. I shall not allow you, Stuart, to do this kind of work." "My dear mother, I am of age 1" Mrs. Crosbie was silent, and Stuart, looking up, saw the pain and anxiety on her face. "Fergie* me, mother," he added, mov- ing toward her. "I am very selfish. Tell me what you want me to do, and if it is in my power I will undertake it." "I want you to rise in the world; I want you to be famous, Stuart." "Faine is not to be bought. mother." "It is within your reach. Contest Chesterham at the next election. You will be 'returned with an immense ma- jority. The rest will follow." "1 'have no brains'for politics," de- clared Stuart. "I can not do it." "There is no such word as 'can not!'" returned Mrs. Crosbie, vigorously: "If I were in your piece, Stuart, how differ- ently I would act! You are wasting your life." Stuart walked back to the window. will riot give you a' decided answer now, mother,' he said. "Give me tWo days to eonsider." "Willingly," she agreed, "and weigh, all things well. Remember, you Neill af- ford me the geratest happiness in lift 11 you agree to this and to another wish," "To make you happy, mother, 1. would do much," Stuart responded, raising her hand to his lips. "What is it?" Aire. Crosbie drew a losig breetio "That you will marry." "Marry!" repeated ,Stuart, droppin,g her hand, while his face grew white and Itis brow darkened. "'Diet, mother, is impossible." "1 have not spoken to you on this subject before, Stuart, though it has been one very near my heart.. You have been troubled; but you are not my son if you have hot pride sufficient to drown and wash away forever any trace of your trouble. It is not for a Crosbie to submit to insult and humiliation." "I submit to nonel", retorted Stuart, in a quiet, clear 'voice. "You. have been deceived," his mother declared, coldly and proudly; "by one who was not worthy even a second thounlit." "Mother I" he exclaimed, hurriedly, and then stopped. What could he say in defense of Margery? She was, in- deed, all this. "Your wish is sudden," he added, After a pause. "It comes to me quite unexpectedly; but 1 haVe only one Answer to it—I shall never marry!" efrs. Crosbie compressed her lips and. turned away. "Just now you called yourself selfish," she observed. "I think you were rfght." "Why Should I marry, mother?" he cried, euddenly. "You knosv, or perhaps you cart never know, what the past meant to me. 1 'am not a Vane to be turned by every wind. I have loved, and I shall not love again," "What has Mott to do with marr- iage?" "I would not ask any wOulan to be a wife ort such empty tering; it would be it sin. But le is not neeessary. WOUld do anything, mother, in my power to please you; but this 1 can note' "Are you tny child?" Asked hie moths er, quietly and coldly. "Oen you wage your whole life, Bite a misanthrope, be. tame a Village coquette lose laughed at and mocked you? There are good Wo - Men's hernia still In the world, women of our world, who can love and suttee es Suelt creatittee never can." "I will offer no woman. my life 'with- out my love," deeleted Stuart, firmly, - "What woule you say If I were to tell you that there is one who would take It gladly, *me who has watehed and Worked for you all those menthe in eh fence, and who, through everything, is steadfast and true as atoll?" Mrs. trosbleht Lena fell on her eon's shoulder as she spoke. Site felt it *sae her last eard; it might win the genie. Staled looked into his mother% ere; a flush rose to his face. "You VOW." began. "Your ousts, Vane," ale broke In. "Vane!" Hit mother's hand .elipped from it% hold; bat he diet not move. He wee in a very whirlwind ef eaglet, pain and "Anther hap, sir," anewered the fit teeere the severe 'weather stert in. 4 "Ton lave not known? No; ihe hid leirmen. "I'm the fatelly." Went out early and returned bite, sober secret to well! There is a woman fit to be your wife—Proud, loving, our- ageous a companion to cheer, it. hale' mete etimulate your embition. Had you. not been so blind, Stuart, you might have seen thie. What do, you say now?" "I eau may nothing," he answered, still la the sense low tones, "This has - *Nutted me. You muet let thinkt mother* /um not the power to apelike feeVe." "Yes, think—and think well," Mrs, Crosbie said gently. Something Old her that elle bed won; Vane% devotion had toughed the eight elm& She watelted her son move to the doot iu silenee. "We will speak of tide Again another time," he said, with. eonetraint. A. wave of compunction paseed through Mrs. Crosbie mud when elle was alouo, Would Valle, after all, bring him hap- piness? She loot trieleed and deeeired him. But this momentary feeling was soon lost in the glad thrill of ambition' that stirred iter leres.st, Stuart marvIed, and in Parliament„ she had nothing more to wish for, In a maze of troubled thought's. Stu- art strode down the wet paths. Vane loved him; an4 yet she had put her own feelings on one side end ministered ten- derly, thoughtfully, kindly to hint! Whitt depths of womanly sweetness in such a sacrifice—what generone, noble nature!' Ris heart warmed with grati- tude toward her, though it cooled again as he remembered that she love& him. :What could he do—whither turn in this dilemma? Irene wee dear to him as a friend, as a. sister, but riot tie the wo- man he would make hts wife, And to make any woman his wife now, when such sadness darkened his life, was at, most impossible. What must he do? Could he let lier live on'alone, with the sorroNe- lie knew from experience to be so bitter wearing out her heart? Would it be e geeeroue return for All she hact done, for the noble tenderneaa with which She had tried to bring hint happi- netts? 'No, no, a thousand time e nol If he could no longer have joy, if glad, nese were gone forever, he had still the peiteefel pleasure of bringing gladness to anether's heart. His mother Waa. right—it was Ids duty to face the world and. Vane would be his wife. Even while he thought this, his brow contracted with pain, a spasm of undy- ing regret ahot through hint, the dream of his first love in all its. sweetness re- turned and inthralled ltine onee more. It: was impossible! He paced up and down wider the wet dripping trees, try - to calm the tumult in his breast, with a longing for solituee and .peace one moment, and a piteous thought of Vitne's great love the next, It was a terrible struggle, and It lasted through the night hours, never ceasing 'till the dawn, when, pale and worn, yet with a steadfast look of rletermination about his mouth and in his handsome eyes, he conquered it. He was brave and strong —sorrow could not crush him; but Vane —poor delicate "Vane—she could not en. dere trouble; and so, if indeed his moth- er had spoken aright, he ,would. go to Vane, and ask her to be his wife. • The gloomy, weather in London did. not tend to lesson Miss Charterie' de- spoedent mood. She was peevish, bored, discontented, longing to leave England and go to a warmer climate, yet ,feeling that she could not give up her desire and declare 'herself defeated,. She was waiting only for a week or two to pass, and then she would go down mice more to Crosbie Castle and Make a final ef- fort.. Thia him was occupying her mind. as she sat one dull, wet afterimon gaz- ing out into the dismal streets, with a gloomy look spoiling her pretty fate. She heard the -door open, but did not stir, imagining it to be her mother. The stillness that followed caused her to turn; and, looking round, she met Stti- art's eyes, "Stuart!" she exclaimed, her face flushing. "You have given me quite it start! I did not know—" ei have been watching you for the last two minutes, Vane; you evert lost in thought. Whose .mernory 'Were you honoring by such deep meditationt" Stuari looked very handsome, and something. in his manner tinelled her with joy. "I was •thinking of Crosbie" she an- swered, "Come to the fire,‘Stuart; yon Inuit be frozen. And how is Aunt Con. stance—and why have you come? I am very glad to see you." Stuart. stood silent, slowly removing hie gloves; then he moved nearer to her side by the fire. "Vane was looking lovely; the plieintive sadness of her feet, which WAS tinged, with delicate flush, Leeched him. lie had read it well in the first moment of his entranee, and traced, as he thought, the marks of her trouble. 'I have come to see you, vane," he tele ecre quietly; "because I have some- thing to ask you." 'Vane felt her heart beat wildly, • "Yes, Stuart," she said, faintly. "Vane, you know my inmost heart— you were my confidant, tay friend. 1 Want you to continue to be my ,frioed, the fbest and truest of companions—I want a helpmate; eouneelor, I want you to be my wife." Vane stood silent, her head bent. She felt faint, tend, note that success had come at last, she coold not speak. "r cannot offer you great love," Stu- art welit 00, taking her hand—"I will not deceive you, Vane—it is buried in the past; but I will give you affeetion, devotiOn—true and metro devotion, If you will accept it. The gift is poor, Vane. Reject it if yon will., "Reject it, Stuart!" murmured Valle, turning her luminous: blue eyes on him. "No; I accept it, fer I love you -1 have loved yen through It all, and I itin hap- py at laser" Stuart pressed his lips to hers; and the tamped Nees eettlea. CHA.PTER XXIII, Miss Lawson kept to her word wed departed on the following day for Hurd - ley, despite all elargery's pleading find Wishes. The short visit had been great pleasure to them both. To Margery the very sight of Mer goecrttees had brought beck a Wart of her brief. past happiness, and tniconseioosly toothed her; and Miss tweet). had felt her heart thrill with pride and gladness te site her pupil pewit so fair and lovely a woman, and Surrounded by all that she could. desire. Yet the strange eadness in Margery% eyes would haunt het. What coule bit the secret that had destroyed her .girl- hinter:8 and brought esuch ail expression to the young facet Mies Lawson pen; bred this deeply, but could atrive itt no solution of the myrstety, ana Indeed would have been no little astohishea had ' ehe Ieernea What link It was thet hound Margery's heart to lfurtley. She kneW the girl hact been siegiteinted with Stn. art Croelbiee but that tact wet not Avenge, for Stuart. bed a kind word and . smile for eseryone in the village, and Margery ef eonrse altered this generel frienciehlp with the tett. (Io be Ooritinned.) et Belgrade, Servia, it grou of women has petitioned the Authorities to pro- Itibit gambling tinder severe pemilty than thote tow in force, As a eroff to thia a number of men are now petition" lug for the eompuleory doting of 111 milliners' elope, eddueleg thet they are a greeter some of domestic discoril and ponntry, BAD DREAMS CURED A WInnInes Man Tells of a Simple Remedy That Cured. tSCAPE FROM INDIGESTION "Theueli I ant an active hard work- ing enanestontehow I fell into it 0011ilitiOn o,fp,noorTrditiegoesliforn. Ealtbd, odieetsvrteinrendeys.t04in- 4lithe morning I had a very unpleasant taste in the Mouth. My Owe Wila Whitish and nething tested good. Au hour or so after eating I experience4 pair; in my riglas Ode, gas formed in the atomic:It and ettereed great distrees. Even In warm weather my 'halide felt clammy, ancl still worse my (system Wall seldom regular. Beoodiug and deseond- ency would new and then get hold of Me and eempletely unman me. When un- fit for work I tried Dr. Hamilton's Pillsre say case their wouderful mune tive power was like magic. So mildly did they work upon my system I at first thought they wouldn't benefit. But n few doses proved how much they helped the stomach, bow quickly they brace up digestion. Food fasted nater - a!, my appetite improved, my face look- ed dear and Insight, and day by day as I gained in bealth, so I pined in spir- its. To -day 1 ant as sound,healthy, vig- orous and well es Any num could be. Dr, Hamilton's Pills aid it all." Beware of the dealer that may try to WI you an inferior pill to Dr. Hamil- ton's, which are sure to help and cure. Sold in yellow boxes, 20e box, All dealers or The Catarrhozoue Co., King. ston, Ont. THE TALE OF THE SARDINE The sardine has been honored with a history, the writer being 110 less a per- sonage than a member of the Societe Acadernique, of Notes. The sardine in the early days was brought in in small boats. Then eame a police ordinance In 1738 in the interest of the poorer classes against the monopol- ist. Owing to the police ordinance the sardine was a Imam of livelihood to the Bretons. joaepn CiOlin, 'whose mule is still revered in Nantes, first prepared the fish with oil. Iris venture was a grekt success, end Ise heel many imitators. In 1835 there was something like a crisis in the sardine industry. 3fillet, who was the chief curer, had his factory iodicted as a nuisance, but the difficulty was overcome by removing it from the centre of the town to the shore. Al- though the fame of the sardine was firmly establisbed, it was only in 1865 that it received its apotheosis. Then it was shown in the Paris Exhibition. 11,4 DIPLOMATIC HUSBAND. Mrs. Max—Can't afford to let me go to the seashore. Why not? My Ward there wouldn't eost,much more than it dorir,Ma heire.x_i admit that, my love; but think of all the money I'd have te spend entertaining myself in your absence.— Boston Transcript. ,•••••••••••••••=1 St jortepte Levee, July 14, 1903. Minard's Liniment Co., Limited. Gentlemen,—I" was badly kicked by my horse last May and after using sev- eral preparations on my leg. nothing would do. My leg was black its jet. I was leid up. in bed for a fortnight and could not walk. After using three bot- tles of your MINARD'S LINIMENT I was perfeetly cured, so that I could start on the road. MS. MBES, Commercial Traveller. REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR (New York Press.) Ws a short sermon that makes no sneezing. A man gets back from a family Menlo with more horrorsto tell than If be were home from the wars. Maybe the reason a woman spends alt her pocket money the minute she gets It is she easn't any pockets. The way to win a woman% undying affection is to remark to her upon her new gown when It Is made over. Justwhat you really think of a man who imagines you admire him wouldn't more than what he surprise film any really thinks of you would surprise you. 4 • t Minard's Liniment for sale every- where. " • • • A TERRIBLE DREAM Her face is drown, her eyes are hag. wird and sunken, and her expression is that of a woman on the verge of ner- Vous prostration. "What in the world is wrong?" mks the astonished friend. "T never saw any- one look so terribly." "It is all because of a terrible night- mare I had lest night," explains the euf- ferer. "It simply shattered myr nerves, and although I know it was merely se dream, still I cannot rid myself of its effects. I dreamed 1 WM called upon the expectedly to plan a dinner for ler. Wi- ley, Dr, Woods Hutebison and lepton Minard's Liniment Cures Dandruff. ; THE POPE AND THE PIGMN. The illness of the Pepe recalls to the tendon Globe a story witieli went the rounds at the time of the illness of Leo XIII. Every day at a certain hair a pigeon, After the manner of Ilottle.e &nee, used to come to the study of the.pontiff, who, no matter what the bulginess in hand. Was, would go to the bird and teed it. On the day that the Pope was see - ed with his fatal ilinese the pigeon caMet as Mal, but iellftd the windine, closed. The bird flapped its wing against the palm and then atm& the glass with its beak. The Pope heard it and ordered the Window to be opened and his eame- tier to feed it. The bird -would not. eat, but perched itself on the dying pontiff's touch, and theer demonstrated ite de- light at seeing its old friend and protee- tote—New York Tribune, Wigg—HelioI old man. 1 never flaw you looking better. Wagg—Well, 1 do feel In, prety mesa shape. You see, Pee been too busy this summer to go away for it rest. LEFT HAND MUSIC) Resmon for the composition of Pieeee of that Nature Piano Anode written for else hand may strike the uninitiated as freakieb, but there is eneugh of It to demand, Nome explauation. These composition* are al - mot for the left hand, the meson given by writer in the Etude being that the right hand gets plenty te do in the average piano piece, bat that the left hand ot often comparatively idle. Playere sometimes disable the right hand and wrist with injedielone And eX- ceseive practice. It is then that the left hand pieee comes itt for its share of attention. If one cannot present one' e itelf to the exuding teaeber owing to a lame right hand one need no lose the lesson on that tteeount; hence the necceeity of the lefthand pieee. The question may be esked, is the left hand piece needed as a teehnical study? The answer given by the writer is that it is not needed, if correct and, adequate teehnical trainiug'is being pur- sued. By adequate le meant the equal training of hands, wrests and arms in the same exereisee, the left liana doing exactly the same things as the right. Both bandit should be aisle to play trills, scales, chords and octaves with equal facility .and power, 11the player hem bed no suck founda- tional trebling there may be a wide dif., ferenee between the facility of the two hands. He may have played much 'salon music, which 'usually requires far less activity in the Jett hand than in the right hand. In this event the mastery of a few left-hand pieces will he of real benefit. There is quitea list of Ow positions of this character. -ivia&ci e5" 16 RELIGION AND SHORT RATIONS "I suppose," said Collector Loeb. "that in the past a good many people looked on o striet observance of the customs lews from a selfish and worldly point of view. They are like Aunt Mary Persira. Moos. • "Aunt Mary called one day on the vil- lage lawyer. "'Well, old lady,' he said, 'what call do for you?' "'Ah wants to divorce man bus' band,' ?aid Aunt Mary. "'Divorce old Uncle Bile' tried the lawyer. `Good gracious! Why?' "'Beeause he's dune got religioeedat's why.' said Aunt Mere-, 'an' we ain't had a chicken on de table fo' six weeks,'" WHAT MAN IS MADE OF We all remember, probably, "what little boys are made of, made of," but it has taken a Etiropeen scieutlet quite e. Nvhile to figure up what the average man is made of, aud to state it in coin- ineicial tents. Title averame man in health, be finds, has the material tor 13 poumbi of tallow candles, one pound of nails, earhon sufficient for 800 pen- cil= skin to make bindings for 10 octavo hooks, bone for 500 knife handles, 28 violin strings 20 teasponfuls of salt and one pound of sager. In the _market the evevage man would fetch about 54.50, as raw, material, or about three cents a pound live weight. Ire is, therefore, says tee Pathfinder, not worth half as much as the game weight of pork. '01* BETTER THAN SPANKING Spanking does not cure children of bed- wetting. There is a constitutiOnal cause for this trouble. Mrs. A% Summers, Box W. 8, Windsor, Ont., will send tree to any mother her successful home treat- ment, with full instructions. Send no money, but write her to -day if your Children trOttble you In this way. Don't blame the child, the chances are it can't help It. This treatment also cures adults end aged people troubled with urine dir- ticutles by day or night, AN IDEAL ARTESIAN BASIN. This term is applied by C. E. Ste- benthal, in Paper No. 240 of the Hydrographio Department of the 'United States Geological Sureey, to the San Lola Valley in Southern Califotnia,, Its length, north and south, is about 150 miles, and its greatest width about 50 miles. Al- though the streatns that flow down into it from the bordering mopntains tileappear as soon tI6 they reach the alluvial elope, there is tut abundance of water underground contetioed in beds of fine sand varying from one foot to 20 feet in thickneee, and sep- arated by beds ef blue clay from one foot to *several hundred feet thick. No last than 3,234 welle already ex - fat capable of irrigating 26,000 acres. Minard% Liniment Cutts leurtis, Etc. STRA I GHT ADV I OE. A eorrespendent Who ha1t just been nmeh enWrteined by the etories lawyers have told 113 ill thie irtlditt frosn his Own experience: A farmer friend of mine went to an attorney at the eonntry. Lea, put before him the canoe orhas dieputee and staked hint if he would handle the ettger. "1 ellettld be glad toe" replied the lawyer. "We are *etre to win it "So yeu really think I have it pod eaeel' ' "Why, it'e aeinele Its dead open and shut. I tan guarantee that I'll get a verdict ;.11 your fever." 'justly or by triekery?" "Seetly runt equitably, air. YOu can't lose." "Thank you for your nilViee, ain't vitt' to law this time. I've jost given you the other eide of the ease, an' sinite you're ea sure, it'll win I'd better drop it. Theitke jest the Mune. flood merning!"--Cleveland Plain Desteler, are new and entirely different Imm ordinEy preparations. They accomplieh their purpoee without disturbing the rest of the system, end are therefore the Ideal laxative for the nursing mother. es they cia not affoot tho child. Compoundedlike all NA.DRU,CO preparetleue, by expert chemists, If unsatisfaatery we'll gladly retnre your money, 23c. & box, It your dreggtst hae not yet stocked them, send 2$0, aud we will mail them. National I)roir smi Liic4 Corepsny at Goads. &halted. •P quilted. .11..1.41001000.1120.01. EDDY'S KITCHEN -WARE Ideal in Every Way for the Various Needs of the Busy Housewives These utensils are light and durable, have no hoops to fall of or rust, will not taint water, milk or other liquids Alla are imper- vious to the same. They will stand any clim- ate and any fair usage, Made in Pails, Tubs, 1Ceelers1 Milk Pans, Wash. Basins, Etc, 11.11116610111=1Mmo Tha E "Try Than. They'll Please You." . CO HunB. CEDDYanada :kat gl.41.1 ,iiikirS_UAlt4LESY 1Miffity4An'ttql1105.. .*PLI)ittv'erasicE*, 4 LATE INVENTIONS. Art electric meter has been Invented for measuring the flow of steam an pipes. Artifielal wood for matehes made from straw, has been inVented. by a Freneinnan. To a 'Massachusetts man has been vented a patent for a neleetrie lamp and reflector for inspecting the inside of shoes. In Prance there has been invented a flourless bread -making machine that transferms the while wheat into dough. A. swiveled clamp by whieli a homel may be fastened ot a bottle to leave one hand free when liquids are poured is a Californian's invention. ' The bottom and sides separate and can.be adjusted to any size desired in a baking pan invented by a Pennsylvan- ianA' barrel-shaped packing ease that has been patented by an Illinois luau eau be folded for transportation when empty an used many times. A Pe-nnsylvanian has equipped the • head of a piano tuning hammer with a retchet so thee it will riot have to be lifted from a peg every time it is A ,Californie inventor's wave power inotor consists of a small truek with a broad tail. A wave, striking the tail, puShes the affair up a trakc and a pis. ton in the head of the truck compres-ses air in a eyliader. Welt Well! THIS Is a HOME DYE III That MAYON E can use IF 1 dged ALL fhese \ DI FFERENT KINDS of Goods with the SAME Dye. r7-1 used CLEAN and SIMPLE to Use. NO chance o fusing the WRONG Dye for the Goods one has to colOr. All colors from your Druggist or Dealer. FREE Color Card and STORY Booklet 10, Tito Johnsonalchardson Co., Limited, Montreal, CHOOSING A KITTEN. They said. "Now choose •whieli you to keep:" And they meant know. WiSti the mother would go to sleep, And not sit tnere and stare at me so— She heard, and she understands, 1 know I suppose they think that It takes too much milk, And meat, and things to feed all four, The darlings! They're just as soft as silk. Now the folks might fuss if there had been more, But It's such a few kittens, only four' Sball t keep the oue who is saying "Please!" Or that funny one, who is just half black? Or the one with the stockings up to his knees? And patches all the way down his bank, And his little ears, finished off with black? Or the dear little white one, over there. 'Who does not seem to suspect at all? At least, if she does, she does not care, For she's actually playing with it bail! I cahoot choose—I must keep them all! want to drown the rest, I Minard's Liniment Relieves Neuralgia RE00110 FOR SIZE Senator La Follette, hintself one of the directest of speakers, has a natural horror of soteclies of the rambling, bor- ing kind. In a reeent seesion 4 certain Senator, after elaborating in a speeeli of two hours astatement that would have been better made in a speech of two min- utes concluded: "And that's the situation, gentlemen, in a nutshell." "Gracious," said Senator La Follette, sotto voiee, "nliat a ISSUE NO. 88, 1911 AGENTS WANTED. L3.. LINE FOREVERY HOME — Write us for our choice list of agents' supplies, We have the greatest agency proposition in Canada to -day. No outlay necessary. A.pplY R. C. L 226 Albert street, Ottawa, WEN ANTED, RPRESETATIVEs OF Tv either sex, locally, on blg Holiday Inducements; sell at sight; $2 per daY and cormniesion; experience unnecessary. a, I,. Nichols co., Limited, Toronto, 0.11•11•Maill.01..•11•MOn ..esousonagoLVOism.s.4 Every Woman is interested and should know about the wonderful MARVEL Whirling Spray The new Vaitinitt Syringe. Best —Most convenient. It cleanses instsntly. Ask you dnsggist for If he cannot supply the MARVEL secopt no other, but send Stamp tor illustrated book—sealed. It gives fait panic, niers anddirections invaluable to lsdlet WINDSOR SUPPLY CO.. Windsor., Oat. General Agents for Cam, CARE OF GOLDFISH. Editor, --Will you please tell me how I can keep my gold fish alive? I have had two lots and all have died, in. spite Of good care, MRS.. L. W. A. Have pure water, well water if you can get it, and change the water in the globe once a week. Alvvaere keep a bunch of mass itt your globe, as the fish like to nibble it and it keeps the water sweet. Give the Belt a_ealt bath once a. week, which keepe them in good health. Use one tea- epoonful of salt to one quart of water and keep the fish in it 15 minutes. Once a day feed thein with prepared fish food. Tf you follow these rules you will have no trouble. Many gold net are killed by too =oh atten- tion,' ts • 4. SEPTEMBER How did you shake J. P.? You do look mighty good to us. We had almost forgotten bow sun- ehine looks. Do be bountiful with Nature's gifts. Let us have good measure "pressed you! .y*ou may reduce the for you "have come into the ediAsII(1114‘tgt'71°Ilediod°111.1o'fac'll°ttibill ooegyr. this very purpose. There's one blot on your 'scutcheon, though—hunters use you as an excuse for shooting our feathered friends. HOW DAYTON LADIES CURE TREIR COEN.PINCHED TOES, Mies M. Lukey, of Zeno, avenue, Day- ton, Ohio, writes:: "Before tieing Put. emu's Painless Corn Extractor" I. was - quite laid up with corns, and could not even steed the pressure of a loosely but tnned shoe. I epplied Putnenfe "Ex- tractor," and in a very few hours obtain. ed relief. le. a miraculously short time I was completely cured. r take pleasure itt recommending ybur Putnam's to my friends." All druggists sett Putnam's Corn Extraelor in 25e bottles. CONSOLATIONS OF THE POOR . "We must always look on the bright side," said Mayor errice, of Fort Wayne, discussing a party setback with the In. dianapolis Star. "We must all take a leseon from Hiram Husk, "Hi Husk, you know, visited Long 'Is- land, and had his pocket picked at a side show. "'I should think,' his wife sneered, on his return home, `thatyou'd have a pur- ty poor opinion of Coney arter twin' robbed of your purse like that!' "'Yes, that's right,' said Husk, 'but I come out better'n some folks did. Why, Maria, the old banker's ward in the piece, beautiful Thais, had all her jools swiped, and then the banker's wife throwed vitrol in his face durize the same act I hadeny wallet stolen." It isn't always the fellows with tke broadest shoulderwho carry ott the honors. `itiodommismstisomigimateratiguarion SAVES YOU MONEY TO buy the Sugar that saves you money means a great deal to every home, as so much is used ley every person, every day. BECAUSE less of this Sugar is required for sweeteniecthan other Sugars, and as it has the greatest amount of sseeeteniug to the pound, the Sugar that saves you money is You alto get fill measure, and all packages etottain Aletellitely calve Weight, and, When bought thio way, subetitution k innme4ib1ie Try St. Lawrieve Sugar to -day— and SAW MONEY, T. LAWRENCE SUGAR ICEPIINING •CO., Mitten, etreetreeet