HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Wingham Advance-Times, 1984-04-11, Page 34•
•
IN
OEtti:�lr't�t
'Up
0110 altf`Uo T1>
Us A 1 t t't ,Forget, Nc
Winter This Ali• fp*ns. Again.
Why Not Save By Insulatirig..
"FREE ESTIMATES"
We Will MatchOr Better Any
HOMES BUI T PR' 0 TO 1971 ARE.
NOW ELIGIBLE FOR J A C.H.LP. GRANT
UP TO A MAXIMUM 0P500.00 OFF
YOUR INSULATING COST . L.
HUNTER II.SULA -
S,rt,SI,3(1 )41 Guarante!• 1 Lill Cullt.•t1
zl' tate sc. Hanover 364-4494
Or Evenings
369-6888
5".
I.
to et 0 IS 0
I
0
0 0
0
as
et
•
CKVR: Barrie
41) . WJ0.1K Oet . it
0.000.000.000,:
6 .. ego TorotltO.:
50 .. WOW Detralt
6 .. 41obal
7 ... WKBW Buffets
00
70 .. WJBk R
a ... COX wi hent
io ,. CFPl. t0.0
11 ... CHCHH Maltoe
La4..015C0 Kitchener
Cltty TV Toronto
99
/00000 • 0,0 ..01110000 0 *0.000 00000 0 Ises
Wed., A pr.218
AFTERNOON
12:00 Barbra McLeod
Show 5
Terrytunes 8, 10
The Green Hornet 57
Leave It to Beaver 3
Flintstones 13
News 6, 7, 7D, 4D, 5D
12:25 Agri -News 13
If you're determinedto give
your baby a healthsr sthrt on life,
j1ease It's a simple fact . Measles.Watch your
read
that the good health of a child starts diet. Getmuch rest and fresh air as
with the_good health of its mother: you can. No smoking: No alcohol No
I1 -your thin avuig a unnecessary' Vii°no easy e,
baby -or are already expecting one- but remember that the closer you •
remember take good care of yourself can stick to it, the better the chances of
farst,. Relnember to a eek for immunity startirgyour child oftto a:hany,
to } ubefi , aisoknocv�i as Cerci ran " h!ifritIliYbegVmhig.Ittl:fiatfis w th you.
Presented by The Easter Seal Society, Ontario
in partnership with Imperial Oil Limited. (
12:30 The Young and
Restless 7D, 4D
All in the Family 5
Super Pay Cards 11
Tattletales 13
Ryan's Hope 7, 57
News 10, 3, 6
1:00 Don Harron Show 13
Citylights 57
Let's Make a Deal 6
Days of Our Lives 11,
5D
All My Children 7, 8,
5,3,10
1:30 One Day ata Time 57
As the World Turns 6,
7D; 4D
2:00 Laverne & Shirley 57
Take 30 8, 5, 3, 10
One Life to Live 7, 11
Another World 5D, 13
2:30 Coronation Street 5
Capitol 7D, 413
Good Company :3
Wok with Yan 8, 10
It's Your Move 6
City Life 57 -
3:00 Three's Company 8
Minder 5
20 Minute Workout 10
Soapbox 11
Do It For Yourself 3
Quincy 57
General Hospital 7, 13
More Real People 5D
The Guiding Light 6,
7D, 4D
3:30 Coming Attractions 10
Good Times 5D
Jeffersons 8
Wok With Yan 3
4:00 Love Connection 13
Beverly Hillbillies 3, 8
Young People's
Special 7 •
I Love Lucy 10
Battle of the Planets 6
Eight is Enough 7D,
4D
Jeffersons 5D
20 Minute Workout 57
The Young and the
Restless 11
Do It for Yourself 5
5:00 Wheel of Fortune 13
Little House on the
Prairie 1),
Family Feud 7D, 4D
Barney Miller 5D
Three's Company 3
The Price •Is Right 8,
10, 57
Coming Attractions
Videos 5
Charlie's Angels 6
5:30 News 3, 7D, 4D, 5D
Newscope 7
Three's Company 5
WKRP 13•
EVENING
6:00 News 6, 11, 10, 8, 7,1/45,
13
Star Trek 3
Citypulse 57
6:30 News 7, 7D, 4D, 5D
7:00 That's Incredible 8
Father Murphy 3
Love Connection 7D,
4D
Joker's Wild 5D .
One Day at a Time 10
MASH 57
Wheel of Fortune 7
Entertainment
Tonight 11
That's Life 6
Happy Days 5
Family Feud 13
7:30 MASH 57
Family Brown Coun-
try 13
Best of Barbara 5
Three's Company 10
Don Cherry's
Grapevine 11 .
Wheel of Fortune 5D
PM Magazine Detroit
7D, 4D
More Real People 6
Family Feud 7
8:00 Domestic Life 7D; 4D
Real People 5D, 6
Fall Guy 13, 7
,NHL (Finals) 5, 3, 8,
10
The 5th Annual Cana-
_...._. ... ...
ran n erna
• Drum and Bugle
Corps 11„
1140.e_:adding.in
White"
8' 30 'Einpire:7D. ,4D
:3(.1-_ •fir-4anto -Etc-l�s� ,57...------
All in the Family 5D
One Day at a Time 8
Special 7
Jeffersons 10, 3
Going Great 5 '
Scooby Doo 6
Laugh In 13
NOW
OPEN.
NOW A DEALER FOR
NORTHLANDER MOBILE
HOMIS AND MINILANDERS>
Used trailers also available.
Come out
and play on
our great
9 -hole course.
Memberships or
pay as you play. See
our fully equipped pro shop.
Lessons are available.
• Driving Range
• Miniature Golf
• Tennis
• Family Camping - permanent or overnight
• Motel'and Cottage Rentals
• Home of the Huronia hockey camp
(Call for reservations today)
• Fishing
• Boat Rentals
Pike Lake
RR 3, Clifford
338.3010
lona
9:00 Facts of Life 5D ,
Movies "TBA" 7D,
41); "Charles and
Diana, A Royal Love
Story" 7
Dynasty 6
Gimme A Break 13.
9:30 Cheers 13
The Blue Jay
Highlights 11
Night Court 513
10:00 St. Elsewhere 51), 11
Citypulse Tonight 57
Hotel 13 -
The Forum Presents 6
11:00 Movie "Nunzio" 57
News 6, 7, 7D, 4D, 5D,
11, 13
. National 5, 3, 8, 10
11:20 The Ontario Report 13
The Journal 5, 3
News 8, 10
11:30 Sportsline 6
Tonight Show 5D
Taxi 7D, 4D
News 3
Soccer: Costa Rica at
Ca11
Nightnadalinel 7
11:45 Movie "Get Physical"
8
Only When I Laugh 10
12:00 Movie "Police Story:
Stigma" 13
News 5
Entertainment
Tonight 3
Chico and the Man 6
Soap 7D, 4D
Mery Griffin 7
12:20 Kojak 10
12:30 Entertainment
Tonight 5D
Barney Miller 5
Rockford Files 7D, 4D
Movies "TBA" 6;
"Town Called Hell" 3
1:00 Movie "Spitfire" 5 ,
Eye on Hollywood 7
Thicke of the Night
5D
1:30 Saturday Night 7D,
'4D
News 7
2:00 Dick Van Dyke 11_.__
Nig t atc 7D, 4D,
13
. 2:30 Movie "TBA" 51)
Highlights 5 . .
• Get Smart '11
4:30 Lone Ranger 51)
CFOSS I
11, i$84 Page 10
•
f e too all see my kid
entbet., t Week. I don't
baike tQ, $obody in his ,night
mind has to have .anything to `
do with his relatives. .
From birth to death they
are a pain in the arm. When
a baby is born, allthe eye-
brows go up at the choice of
name, unless it happens to be
one of theirs, or that of a rich
uncle.
Asked my grandboys the
other day what their second
name was. Balind, who
sometimes doesn't know his
anus from his " elbow,
promptly retorted, "Wil-
liam". His second name was
the same as mine, in case I'd
be pleased and leave' him
something.
Asked the other guy, who
knows everything, from why
Gran's crying to why Gran-
dad is in a tearing rage. He
muttered, "Chen". I'd for-
gotten. His parents named
him that, don't ask me why,
because they were on an in-
ternational kick, and Chen
means "first-born". Poor
little devil. His full name is
Nikov Chen. Imagine what
the CIA will do with that
when they take over Cana-
dian -intelligence. Notice I
spelled the last word without
a capital.
Next time the relatives act
like Little Jack Horner is
when your kids get married.
Despite the fact that the
couple has been living to-
gether for nine months, your
blasted relatives want a
church wedding, with the
bride in white, a big recep-
tion where everybody pre-
tends that the newlyweds are
virgin, there are some
adolescent speeches right
out of the age of Victoria,
and somebody cuts a cake
that nobody would eat with a
10 -foot pole. This costs
roughly five to '10 thousand
_so..thattbe.c.duple.can
go on living in sin, but with a
paper to prove that they're
not.
And the third`o'ccasidn on
which the relatives get their
arms into it, right up to the
H. GORDON
GREEN
Now here's a switch! A
father who is worrying be-
cause he doesn't think his
son has a proper sex drive!
Dave is a close friend of
mine; he's a pretty faithful
Presbyterian, comes from
an old established family in
our neighborhood and he's
the father of a fine family
himself. And he's afraid that
there is something decidedly
wrong with his 19 year old
son's biological urge.
"Oh it's not that I'm afraid
he's going to turn out as one
of the nice boys," he told me
tae other day. "He's got a
girl friend. Beautiful girl ..
Built like a Clipper ship, she
is. But somehow or other he
seems a lot lazier about ro-
mancing than I ever was .. .
Ahell ofalot lazier ..."
And what had prompted
such a concern? "Well," his
dad told me, "we have a kind
of gentleman's agreement
about the car, you know. Un-
less there's something spe-
cial afoot, I always let him
have the car come Friday
night. That's the, night he
generally goes girling, you
see. But last Friday he
comes to me and says that I
can have the car this Friday
if I want. Says he won't be
bothering with it! So I
figured maybe he and the
girl were having a tiff, you
know. But he says .no, it's
just that it's too dadgum cold
ivy our old car now with the
heater,only going half blast.
'Why don't you break down
and buy a new thermostat or
something?' he tells me.
'You can't take a girl out in
weather like this with a car
as cold as that!' "
And that got Dave and I
talking about the days way
back when if you had a car to
go courting, it was probably
no better than a Model T Liz-
zie with side curtains flap-
ping; the steam coming up
from the radiator, the
springs coming up from the
seat, the breeze coming up
from the floor and only your
love to keep you warm.
That Model T would be
your old man's of course,
and if the old man figured
Lizzie was just too precious a
treasure to entrust to a dam -
fool kid chasing skirts and
-there was too much snow on
the roads anyhow, well you'd
hitch up the old gray mare to
the cutter and you'd think
nothing of driving five, six,
seven miles even if it was the
kind of night that hung your
nose with icicles.
So we started swapping
tales about those days, and I
told Dave how I used to go
hell a whoopin' down the
concession with my cutter
hung onto a fast horse and
I'd drive six miles out to my
girl's place, and six miles
back again; and sometimes
this would be on nights so
stormy your tracks filled in
as fast as you made them..
And then when I was with
her, all we could do was to
smooch a little till ten -thirty.
That was when her dad
would rap on the stove pipe
up above that it was time for
me to hitch up again and
head for home.
'Yas," Dave said. "and I'
can go you one better than
that. I did the winter part of
my girlin' in a cutter too, but
my girl was a Baptist before
I met her, you know. And she
had a mother who sat up with
her all the time I was there.
She'd be knittin' of course,
but always watchin', watch -
in'...
"And sometimes the w tole.,
dan family would be stayin'
up playin' crokinole maybe.
No cards of course. Oh they
were awful strict, you know.
Cards were a thing of the
devil, same as the dance hall
was the trap-door to hell.
Only they used to play that
silly little game called "Old
Maid". Remember it? The
cards were the same size as
the real ones, but the pic-
tures were different so there
was no sin to them, you see.
"Anyhow one night we
were all around the table
playin' Old Maid - the lamp
in the middle of the table, of
course. But the lamp wasn't
showin' much light and 1
reached under the table to
sneak-a-littie--feel of my-girl-
friend's
n rl=friend's leg and damn if I
didn't get her old man's leg
instead! And that broke up
the game and everything
else. Never did get into her
house again till after I
married her. Had to sneak
around every Young
People's night and meet her
out behind the church shed. I
reckon her folks would never
have let her marry me if I
hadn't got her pregnant. Oh I
tell you we didn't let a bit of
cold breeze bother us none in
those days!
"Can't figure that boy out,
though. Why if I'd a worried
about a bit of cold when I was
his age, I reckon he'd never
been born!"
And after we had quit
laughing about that, Dave
began to wonder if it might
be all these skin magazines
you see everywhere these
days that could be making
young love so blah. "You
take magazines like Playboy
and Penthouse and Gallery
I get a hell of a kick out of
them, old fart that I am. And
there's always one or two of
them layin' around the
house. But this here lad of
mine that's Supposed to be at
the burnin' age - why he
don't even look at them! Now
if you had a son like that,
wouldn't ydu be worried
AA
Y ,
elbows, .is when somebody
dies. This is when the real
Cht'.isstians emerge.
"Mom always said I could
have that tea service."
"Well, that's what you
think. I was there the day she
died and she distinctly stated
(arm twisted behind her
back) that I could have not
only the tea service but all
the linen." And soon.
I've seen all this, but not
experienced it. Aftermy
mother's death, my elder
sister was mutually appoint-
ed arbitrator. And she arbi-
trated: "Two sheets for you,
two for you. Two blankets for
you, two for you. Two linen
tablecloths for you, two for
you. Two beds for you, a din-
ing -room table for you.
Everyday china for you, plus
the silver coffee p'ot. Good
china for you, plus the cham-
ber -pot." And soon.
It was like being at an auc-
tion, without any bids, and
we all went away rather daz-
ed, enriched beyond our
dreams, and with only a few
grudges. We were all so
young and unsophisticated
that we let an aunt have a
beautiful chaise longue,
which wound up as a period
piece in, of all places, Aus-
tralia. My aunt didn't want
it.
This hasn't much to do
with going to see my kid bro-
ther, but I still think that he
thinks he got screwed (he
was in Paris at the time) on
the family split-up, and
covets the hand -carved stool
my Dad made, which I trad-
ed off for an upright piano of
dubious vintage. Maybe not.
Maybe hejust wants to see
me. Maybe he wants to
apologize for all the times he
trailed me all over town
when I was seven and he was
five. I would first hiss at him,
then shout at him, to go
_home. -.He' . _. g b
behind, crying like a fire
siren, stubborn as a hound
following a fox.
Hp's challenged me 'far b
garne of golf. This is. qtd'
understandable. It fits ,the
pattern. I could always beat
him at everything, and he
wants the masochistic. satis-
faction of being trounced
once more, before he retires
to that wonderland of golf
where everybody takes a
Mulligan, everybody rides
an electric cart to the next
hole, and everybody discuss-
es every shot at the 19th hole.
On the other hand, maybe
he wants to talk about all
that money I borrowed from
him when he had a paper
route and I was a - well, a
sort of freelancer.
Every Saturday night, I
used to lock him in the bath-
room and freelance about
two-thirds of his weekly
take, so I could go to the
movies.
Saw him in Germany a few
years ago, and he was still
keeping track. He figures I
owe him 28 thousand, 500 and
some dollars, with com-
pound interest.
Perhaps he just wants to
remind me of all the girls he
has taken away from me,
over the years. He never
took anyone of any real
consequence, but he took
some very fine prospectives.
On the fourth hand, maybe
he justwants to rub it in to
me that I'm a failure. He re-
tired as a Colonel with a
chestful of medals. I quit as a
Flight -Loot with four or five
medals mouldering in the
basement.
He has been at the beck
and call of generals, am-
bassadors, and such. He is
divorced - fashionable. I
am married - unfashion-
able. He in charming, multi-
lingual, has tasted the flesh-
pots of Europe. I am a typi-
cal suburban slob.
Or maybe the poor little
._ffella-Just wants to see the
brother he used ff.-pillow-
fight with, every Saturday
morning.
SAVE AT CAR CITY CHRYSLER
SAVE AT CAR CITY CHRYSLER
Trust Listowel Chrysler To Repair
Your Car
"WE'RE EXPERTS AT REPAIRING"
• Scratches • Dents and Corfiplete Collision
and Painting
FREE ESTIMATES
Come in today and
talk over your
inositIt repairs with ...
allmrl o,,,, LLOYD
McLAUGHLIN
Body Shop
Manager
"You Really Matter To Us"
LISTOWEL CHRYSLER
291-4350
Mon. to Fri. OPEN 8 a.m. to 5:30 p.m
SAIF CFavii1
SAVE AT CAR CITY CHRYSLER
1131SAHH3 JLL13 EIV3 lbs 3AVS
Portraits to
share
delightful childhood changes
from Sears Portrait Studio
20 color portraits for only
12 ?nudes 956 deposit
Photographic package includes two 8x10's,
three 5x7's, fifteen wallet size color portraits.
No appointment necessary. 95C for each
additional subject. Poses our selection. Studios
located in most larger Sears retail stores.
Also available in addition to.package:
Black Background & Double Feature Portraits
Instant Passport Photos
Offtr for portraits taken
Men. April 9, thru Sat. April 14
Sears
your money's worth ... and more
H