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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Exeter Times, 1924-9-18, Page 2For oys e THD PART PENNY PLAYED. D. "Oh, I. know that almoet anybody There was a great dell of excite - "'tient can be called upon, Cousin Belle-- )' ! there's Mr. Wurtz, who has played nrent in the air, Cousin 17oxa Kmg. rehearsal, and Mrs. Hull, Penny's was going to be married, and everyone,music teacher, and oh,dozens of neo was busy doing something for the wed-; a I - din�.$ that is, everyone except Penny.; plea But I was sentianeirtel enough to Cousin Dora liver!' at Penny's house! ones to have in my beide! party the ones I loved and those who love, me. and that was where the wedding was f You know I'm silly about some going to take place, on the lawn under things," the old sycamore tree. Penny end Kitty and Isabel stole Yes, everybody except'poor little; softly ever' to their mother and Cousin Penny was playing ;a part in the wed-; Dora. Oh, how sorry they were to see ding, Mother had made the wedding : Cousin Dora unhappy on her- wedding dress, every stitch with her own, day! !hands, and it looked' pretty enough fort Penny forgot all about her own lit- e princess. But, as mother had said, tie sorry and pressed closer, and said, Cousin Dora would b ,�Reirtcess «Oh, Cousin Dora, please, what has Cliarnnng, for ell.) :., marl) happened?" Prin°°e nt4 z . ,:;,ing That was what Cousin - Dora just had to smile at and her little twin sisters, Penny's tragic little face.'She said, Kitty and Isabel, called hint, Kitty, "Bless your heart, Penny. I suppose and Isabel were to be flower girls.' it doesn't amount to a row of pins Penny was too tall to be a flower girl really,' but Diana Clark, my dear and too small to be a bridesmaid. It• friend, who was going to play the wed - seemed dreadful to be between sizes.- ding march, has telegraphed that she Miss Diana Clark was to play the wed missed. a train and cannot possibly get ding march. She was a noted pianist here until to -night. So you see, it and lived in the city, and she was means that I shall have to call upon Cousin Dora's very dear friend. some one else to, play:—" .At last the wedding day came. "Oh!" Isabel " jumped straight up Everybody was in a flurry of excite- and down. "Let Penny play it! Penny went, running here and there and do-, can play it. She` was playing it two Ing this and that, and flowers and minutes ago," presents were arriving•every other! "Do you think—?" cried Cousin minute. Penny felt in the way. She Dora. was really no part of it—just a looker -1 "I don't. see why not," said mother. on, like many others who were corn- Poor Penny did not know whether aud,she did not know what to do; to laugh or cry,' but before she could With ' herself, Finally she thought she', do either; mother was saying, "Quick, would go into the parlor and practice,' Penny child! Run to the piano and and how she did practice; scales that. let us hear you play it. I know that she< detested,—anything and'every-1 Mrs. Hull gave_ you Me idelssohn's , thing,—trying to forget, that she was Wedding March, but have you ever, not actually a part of the wedding: 4 had the one from Lohengrin?" Of course Cousin Dora would have) Penny could hardly answer that she been dreadfully troubled had she had -taken both just because Cousin known how much Penny took it to Dora was going to be married. It heart. I had seemed fun to take them, but she' Before long Kitty and Isabel came, did not know the march from Lohen-' dancing in to say that their dresses grin so well as she knew Mendel. had come. Here they were in a box,' ssohn's. Mother said that it didn't and Kitty lifted one out, a fluffy-' matter a whipstitch. No one would be ruffled pale pink organdy, and held it listening anyway when it was all over.! up to her. As�for Cousin Dora, she was just "Oh, it's bee-utiful!" Penny exclaim-! laughing for joy, and she said that it' ed, wheeling' around from the piano., would be all right to play Mendel -1 "Is mine in_there, Kitty?" ` i ssohn's before and after the ceremony., Yes, Penny's dress was' there. It So Penny played the. wedding march was exactly like the little flower girls'; and she played it so well that Cousin dresses, for mother' had said that, even' Dora was hugging her tight before she Penny wasn't in the bridal party,` was' half way through. she should have a fluffy-duffled pink!' "Penny, she cried, "I am glad! Oh,! organdy dress. like Kitty's and Isabel's.; so glad! Why,. I declare I am almost. "Let's hold them up tous and march a glad that Diana Clark didn't get here. up and down," said Isabel'. i'I've wanted you in my bridal party. "Yes, let's," cried Kitty, clapping i so bad, Penny,—bless your dear little; hor hr.,,,ie 'heart." "And I'll play the wedding march,"` So after all Penny was not a plain' said Penny, and as the little flower -j looker-on. She played the wedding, girls -to -be marched , sedately up and march, and she wore the fluffy -ruffled down the parlor play it she did, and pink organdy, and instead of ' a wide remarkably well too, for Penny was ai pink satin ribbon bound round her' gifted little pianist. curls •like'Kitty's and Isabel's she wore A few minutes later Cousin Dora a lovely floppy Leghorn hat that was and mother came into the parlor all in the bride's trousseau. And Penny aflutter over something. Cousin Dora was the proudest and happiest little looked as if she were almost ready to' girl in the land, because she had such cry, and mother was patting her arm' an important part to play at Cousin and saying, "But, Dora dear, anybody, Dora's wedding to Prince Charming-' —why, we can call upon almost any -!—Linda Stevens Almond, in; Youth's body. Don't; feel so' bad about it." 'Companion. )la ealti. 'after a m intents i•eflec.tion- "C;<i at, !fount, yawn will go in coria - mend." It was the hive;jor'e 'first chane; to show the•re,inent that he was a man of few words bttt Hind energy, The adjutant seined Isis cap and was away in a second. The captain ,gravely ealanted and said, '1Iow many days' -a- tions, sir?" "Three'" suapeed the major with a flash in his eye.' at The tuo trcoi: i wore already sad- dling tiihee the adjutant returned, The major and the stranger were 'still iaa' earnest conversation, ! "Mr. Billings," Bald the major,."this • scout says that `he had to drop his rifle and that, his pistol's damaged. Just issue him a carbine and a revol- ver, will you? And let him have cart- ridges, too. Of course he'll have to be. arrn.ed." "Who'll sign for 'em, sir?" asked the adjutant, whose pay was already mort- gaged with the inoney value of numer'• ons caobin.es and pistols "issued to. ' scouts" during the summer campaign. "I'll be responsible," said he coni- inander shortly,' "And—let 1VIr, Skin - i ner have breakfast, too." The adjutant had seen much more of frontier scents than the, major had and was still;. doubtful about Broncho Bill • Skinner. "Why weren't you with Buffalo Bill and our' own scouts last summer?" he asked while the cook was preparing hot cakes and coffee, "Bill Cody! 'Why, bless ye, adjutant, Bill. Cody most got down on his knees to me at Lodge Pole last June an' beg- ged me. to go. Said he'd give me two hundred and fifty. a month, but I'd pro- mised Gen. Reynolds, I'd go with him. I was chief scout on the Lar'mle range. watching the reservations while you re c assn,,, t rough the Pow- der River country ---an' they hain't paid niy bill yet. I got a claim for up ward of two thousand dollars for ser- ! vices an' stock worn out during those two summers, At that point Capt. Mount came in. to say that his men were ready. About ten o'clock they rode away, 'fo'iir oft1 cers, the doctor, ninety-five troopers and Mr. Broncho Bili Skinner, bound for Harmon's ranch. "I haci to let that ` long-haired liar have a fresh horse," said the quarter- master to the adjutant when they had silently watched the eohni u out of sight "What are you down for?" "Carbine, revolver and sixty rounds of ammunition," said the adjutant briefly. "Bet you its the last we ever see of 'ens„ • A TRICK OF THE PLAINS By Gen. Charles King One clear, -cold November morning, far away among the foothills of the Rockiee, the cavalry guard at Fort Fos- ter had, just marched to its post when sought refuge in the Big Horn Moun- tains. Indians had not come south of the Platt River sinte June, when the the Cavalry had gone to scout the Black Hills. But who could be sure that they had not now slipped away , for a raid? The cavalry had been at Fort Foster only about two weeks, and . the major in command had only re- cently been transferred from another corps. He and his men were eager to give all possible protection to the set- ewho are you, and where's your a oommotion occurred at the rear gate. ranch?" asked the major, as he eyed A man with long hair, spurs and long, lean legs, who 'had came galloping the stranger. "Who—me? Why, everybodY knoVes from the west, sat on his plunging cow pony, shouting and gesticulatirtg hie! I was scout for Jim Bridger 'way in at 44 back before the war days. I ran the 'wrathfully. ,He had tried to ride top speed, but a sentry, springing to P'°°Y. express twe Years from Laemie to Devil's Gate. I was scout for the the middle of the road, had stopped Utah expediticFn in '60, the time we got him. Orders prohibited riding or driv- snowed in on the Sweetwater. Every- ing into the garrison except at moder- *, body knows me! Why, I was guide to ate speed. ; the 2nd Dragoona for two seasons, and "There's no time for foolin'!" yelled.' „wee everybody in the 3rd Cavalry can tell the rider, at the inflexible sentry. "d , you who old Bill Skinner is. Broncho Indians, I tell you! Who's in c m ° I Bill, they call me, because there's not mend?" i a broncho from the -Platte to the Pecos "I'M not; fooline" replied the sentry : I can't break and ride, Why, where sturdily. "Indians or no Indians, I'm on earth did you fellows come from?" in command here, and hare you'll stop 1 The cowboy scout's array of refer - until you Iran ride quietly," . 1 eneee was mmressiye. /n great detail By that time a group of curious spec- he retold his story how the Sioux had tators had gathered. The adjutant jumped Harmon's at dawn and offered stepped briskly over to see what was to lead the command to a ford on the the matter, and the corporal of the Platte where they" would be sure to guard came on the run. !overtake the Indians. He was indig- "Indians, I tell yogi!" 'shouted the nant at,such cross-examination. "Any atranger, shaking his fist. "Jumped time during the last ten years that I've Harrnon's ranch, en the Box Eider be- com.n into this post with an alarm," fore sunup. Scalped every cul 'sept said he. "you'd a' heard 'boots and sad - the worrien, shot at rue and Buckskin dies sound quick as a" flash, and the Pete an' tan us into the teething, He's whole gang would have turned out to gone to warn the folks up at Clear follow me. How far away is Har - Creek, and I Carne here• Do you think , ino.n's? Forty mile, Why didn't, I go that j)ony'd' blow hike that if Indians into 'Larrniie? 'Cause they chased Me' wasn't behind him?" this way., I was in hig"luck to get Dalt. "Pony blows easy enough!" growled at all." the corporate "It's you that's hlowin' The major looked doubtfully round hard! Go env in and see whether the him, seeking suggestion in the impass- major will swallow your' Story—or sive faces of the adjutatit and the Old swallow you.!" a.nd the new officer of the day. Ile t was just after the big' Indian war hated to order his men out on a wild - of 1976. The Sioux were. back oil; the I goose chase, but he would hate in retiervatiorie, except those who had fol- 1 finitely more to have it Bald of him lowed Sitting pull across the Yellow- 1 that he bad failed to act in an Indian steno and the young braves who, loyal Ir•.i7. tq thole horn loader, Crazy Horse, had 1 "Order, out troops B and K at onee," But the- grizzled captain who was sent forth in command of the two troops knew something about scouts. In forty-eight hours the column was back, none the worse for the trip, but the redoubtable Skinner was not with them. "What is the matter?" inquired the majbr. "Nothing." replied Capt. Mount " 'Ware icebergs!" The dreaded cry of the North Atlantic has rung but and the ice patrol is' 'leashing its way slowly toward the big berg to investigate 'how far it is extending beneath the water so as to be able le waen other ships of ,the danger. The scene is near the Grand Batiks-. eeeeeeeeeeee placidly. "Harmon's place is ail right. There hasn't been a Sioux south of the Platte since summer." "What did you do with Skinner?" asked the major. "Nothing," rep -lied Capt. Mount, "All he wanted was a new outfit and an es- cort to the mines in the Black Hills. That's why he tried to guide us north tie the Platte instead of west up Box Fader. He'd counted on our going his , way, and I'd counted on his going ' mine. As soon as alie,found. that out he saw Indians away -off northward and started a.fter them, and I started Sergt. Dolan and three men after him. They'll bring in all that we want of him." They caught him late that night. He had led them a loag chase, but they were experienced men. They brought in the horse, the arms and the ammu- nition, but not the man. "Why didn't they bring him?" asked the major. "No law to cover the case," replied the captain. "All the courts in Chey- enne would have been after us if we'd laid a hand on him. He'll sue for dam- ages as it is—when he's had time to walk back. But I'll settle him." that evening the captain wrote to the "'old reliable" of the regiment! the world-famous Buffalo Bill, who through six summers and fcur etirring , campaigns had led the outfit all aver the Indian. counrry. This was the scent's answer: "Know Bill Skinner? 'Deed I do— , for the biggest liar and aleekest horse thief 'from the Platte to the Pecos,' as he says. He never saw Jim Bridger, never rode a pony express, never earn: ed an honest dollar in his life that I ever heard of; and we wouldn't take him on. the Sious compaign for the reason that he was always- seeing In- dians when there weren't any and never when there was. That's Bill Skinner--a.nd there's lots more like And so we learned. We had inen who were invaluable, like Buffalo Bill himself. Ben Clark with the CheYen- Frank Gruai:d with the Sioux, Al Sieb- er with the Apaches, all thaee men we lea,rnecl to trust But in the old eavalry I da3-s the frontier was full of Buckskin Petae and Broncho A Triumph of Friendship. A fine story comes from India. The famous and influential Hindu, Mahat- ma Grandi, was recently attacked by acute appendicitis while he was in prieon, whither his opposition to the British. government had brought him. Something had to be done at enee, In other timez such a nian—a rebel in the' eyes of the prison authorities- - might have been allowed to die while the red tape ell the prison rules was 'bein.g unwound; but the English doe - Just Like the Men. Mrs. Pigeon—"You're a fine Carrier Pigeon. I gave you a. letter to post three dais ago, a.nd you haven't mailed. New Lamp for Miners. A lamp hat sounds a warning when fire damp is present is used -in Eng- land to warn miners. - " COMPANY'S col/um " Story of Unhappy Impressions of Treeless Farms on the New Prairie Settler -- Mis- tress Hennessy" and Missui Wallace." Back in the days of the old faehion- ed. parlor with its horse -hair uphols- tery, its whatnot, wax flowers, be - spangled hanging -lamp and so on, I can remember mother saying—"Come, children, and get tidied up, company's coming." Then we would be washed and scrubbed and rigged out in our Sunday hest. Ali morning long the parlor would be a busy place. The brie-a-hrac would be taken piece by piece and ,dusted; the brass coalhod and its accompanying shovel and the poker would be burnished' bright. The heavy starched Lace curtains would be shaken. In fact everything in that holy of holies would be gone over with the greatest of `care. Company was earning! And then, later, with much cere- mony, the visitors would arrive and we would all sit on those glistening, rounded, smooth horse -hair seats and try to look' comfortable until one of us youngsters would suddenly .lose his grip and slide to the floor. The guests would• laugh heartily and :one by one the rest of us would take a slide until mother put a stop to the 'showing off' and banished us from the room: Yes, indeed, the coming of company. in those' days was a great event, but while none of us regrets the passing of the horse -hair, most of us can regret a' little � the passing of the thrill in those words—"Company's corning." Thousands of settlers,are coining to Canada.' I wonder sometirries if it wouldn'�t'be a good thing to revive the old fash.`ioned idea ' of preparing the parlor for our guests, Some years .ago I was travelling from Montreal to the West. On'the- train was; a . ear of British Settlers,. They had• had a wonderful trip, since leaving Liverp000l. All were looking £arward to the new life,,, to the new home that was to, be 'theirs. ' en the Canadian 'prairies. They never tired of 'the view - from the.car Windows. Passitig through Quebeo'and 'Ontarto they were loud in their: lrrai5e of the trees ..a.rel snug ,little farms. Laugh- ingly they joked back and forth, Mrs, Wallace was smypgthetic with Mrs, Iiennessyv "Aye, Mietress Hennessy," ' she would say,"mind, an' I'm tellin' ye,. tb:•ere's nae a Shanirooic: can grow in Saekatohewln, nae a Shamrook, an' By C. J. Broderick. ye'll be that homeseek, I'm a tellin' ye, no trees to climb and no swing's? Are 1 mind," al'id the amplle peeson of Mrs.' the wee bairns to know only the green Wallace would sheke with laughter. !that comes o' the corn fielde or yon t' yerself, don't the Guard he sayin' but' She would have gone on, but at this la moment since that there's no Heath -1, moment a cry of surprised delight came i er in Alberty? Sure an' its- yer own : from Mrs, Hennessy. "Mrs. Wallaco self will he sick for the sight of Heath Oh, Mrs. 'Wallace, 'come` quick and The men smoked and talked. Labor , At the call everyone on that side of conditions were bad in the homelIand. ? the car rushed across. What thay Somehow, somewhere, here would be saw was a farm house of the bunge- e. chance in the new land. Affil -they ,low type, painted white and set in a asked was a piece of land or a' job of `trim lawn among a grove -of sturdy work, 1 poking trees. After miles of a tree- Presently the, train was on the -lees landscape, •rho `£reels green of prairies. They had heard s0 much of those trees and lawn was a tonic. A. the prairies and they scanned eagerly road Ied back from the house, trees the vast sweeping expanse of level' on both sides, the ;branches; arching country. It amazed them to see the over made of it an, avenue •of rare j. great farms and the seemingly endless beauty" areas of grain fields': just showing A Curve. in the track and the train green from the spring c-eeding.; They was out again on the bald prairie with were in the land of wheat. The first its bare homes. No one' seemed to day passed, but on the` second it"was care much 0-0 wahout the passing'land- ne-tice.able how little : there was of scrape. Mrs. 'Hennessy and Mrs. Wal• small' talk. . The women were noting' Ilace were chatting and laughing to - the farm homes, substantial homes gether and there was a general revival most of them and many pretentious. of interest throughout the ear. The The car was strangely quiet. A talk was no mere of the Shamrock and,!. baby whimpered and was " instantly the Heather, it was, rather, of the l hushed. These people had come from future and of _ the luck that had come a land of trees and hills and they were their way. They were wondering if awed into silence by a landscape un- Butter making here was much different. leavened by hush or green 'woods. It to what they had been used to. Could was Mrs. Wallace who suddenly broke f.hey peep }Tees, or had Canada suffer - the 1u'lf: ecl firm the dread bee disease that- - "Mistress I-Iennessy, woman," she was playing havoe at home? creid' shrilly, "it was the truth they That little tree -bordered bungalow telt us—then' nae trees, Dat trees-! I bad revived their spirits: Trees would didn't believe it when. they telt us," ' grow on the prairies. They knew it But there was no answer from Mrs: now and. were content. They could 1HenneseY. iter thoughts were far Plant trees around -their new : home away. She was seeing again, the trees • They' could have lawns ad flowers. and hedges anti vine e.overed cottages • Within the last few years many mil- ' of Killarney, • lions of trees have made their appear - Down the aisle.cs.me Sandy Waliade auoe and already the prairies -are tali - and plumped into the scat beei o his ing on a new vista, but there are shill time ought to be lost, ordered out his own car and -hurried his patient to the Poona Hospital, where he opera,ted up - Gandhi was under chloroform and the doctor was ready to use Lis in- struments when suddenly the electric light went out, and everything was in darkness. There bad been a break- down in the ma.chinery, but there was n -o time to wait for repairs. 'Under the pale gleam -of a hurricane lantern the doetor calmly proceeded with the operation and thus saved the man's a Doctor and nurses- attended their patient with all passible skill,- and their tenderness and consideration Gandhi but upon the Indian population far 'and 'wide; for in the eyes of the Hindus, Gandhi's life is sgered. be- cause of Ins love far the toOr and. his self-eacrifieing career. When he was released from Meson randhi, whose gratitude to the man who lead stored hie life was touching, said to the docter: dI trust you wile at the prieen until he -was quite etrong betheen the two ment—twe of the finest 8pe-cirnens of' Ease and West,---• pfee-t consequences -Mr India. The Bri- tish doctor, by his devoted cenduet to- ward his prisoner, , has genuinely touched the- hearts- t;1 thoheande who ; were previously only too ready to, call thernsel+-es the enemies of his race. If The World Stopped What woulWd hhaiprplienng.if the earth The possibilities must have occur- Crommelins statement to the British Astronomical Association to the effect that the rotation of the earth on its, axis was graelually slowing down. "No one need become alarmed over the situatiari," Dr. Crommelin said to an interviewer. "The slowing -up pro- cess has been going on for centuriee, and nothing sensational has come out of it •If it dad stop things would shine on one side only, while the other side would he wrapped in 'froeen darkness; and the moon might vanish. "If the earth's motien slowed to one rotation -a year" he added, "each day would be one year long, ae they are thought to be on the planet Mercury. 1 "It -will take a few hendred. million years before the earth's motion, at its present rate, is retarded to a point where it entails aotual- discomfort." , There'll he ao chopping of timber. It's around their homee, etart a little ivy 1 a grand farming country, I'm a think- to cover paint:lees- 'walla, it would- pay I in.," thein a hundred tiniee -over in the -ari- 1 Mrs. Wallace gave him a piercing peal ef ceir prairies to the new' set - leek, "Aye," she seid, "an' what of tier. the Weemhe peat on year in yeti Company'e Coming! Lelde gat Ito bleak, house, Never a birdgnor a bit parlor ready.—(Jdnedian retest lead 0' shade, and what o' the hairne wl' Oittcloors. Prefers the straw. get one of .the new lace give a etraw for one!" The Squeaky Violin. A young student lodging in Edin- burgh went. out and bought a violin; and, going apetairs to hie teem, start- ed to play upon it His -lark acly, eerie g the unueual sounds, appeared at tho bottom of the etairs and shouted,: "Mr. 'Pain, what ".ad fre"tOhylioi/h'tit:yll (3082.1.71,:t:litth'euhretild;''ryin3 Eskimos Fight With Words. tribe "fight" a duel 'their Lengues are4. their weapoee, end the winner le thio one who makes the aneetators leugh the most by saying the worst and wittiest thiege about bits opponent. Such a duel was described by Chris- tian Le,den, the Nerweglan explorer, tion to the Eskimo tinbee In 2he northeremest part of Canada. which was suppoeted by gramophone records. is the first •white man to heve heard two Ealtlince of the remote tribe engage In a duel, and as he heard them "fight" he eurreptitionsly made a gramophone record of it to- take back to hie, patrone, the King and Queen et .• From what the explorer said it ap- pears that these people, to settle seri- ous quarrels, stand oppoeite each other and, surrounded by their families and friends, improvise ballads in which both tey to say the worst and wittiest ehings 'about each other. The one who makes the crowd' latigh the loudest ie judged the whiner in a eblenin ceremony, in which the entire tribe takes- part. • Instead of brooding oyer rev.enge the vanquished "lighter" goes back to his igloo to meditate on what he might have said to his enemy, Mr. Leder' has- also brought back much valuable sociolOgical data re- garding Eskimo -manners, customs, that those people, long believecl to be of Mon'golian origin, migrating acroes the Beeing Strait Irene Asia, are in He asetts that the Eskimo tribes are des`bendants of Indian tribes in, Canada, who were foeced by innumer- able wars to -ward the Arctic regions, to exist as best they tould. • In the silen,t regions GE everlasting ice they manage to preserve, a zetion which is ethically far superior to that of the African savage. The Feskiino belie -vee in immortality for animals ,as well as human beings, and also -hes a hell, which, for obvious reason% exists ,side bY side with the heaven of the Western world, in the sky which is chilly and cold. Ho places 'hist heavenly home, where all the good. and, pure s-oule go, down in the mideregions of the earth; where there is eternal evarmth and eternal Boy Makes Violin With Perfect Tone. With no other thoie than a jack Boston suburb, constructed a full- sized violin fram odds and ends of wood found in his -father's cellar: • Though he never studied violin Mosniovitz had studied the flute, and from hie knowledge of this in•etrument's nmete Wei able to string his Violin correctly. A violin teacher who. tested. the instrument said, its tone' was perf ect. An old pine burea.0 drawer furnish- ed the wood for the bottom of the an oak door from the same Pieee of furnituse furnished wood for the,haelt, the neck was, made from a stfck of -ordinary white wood, and the Was fashioned from an loanable leg. Created Forest Reserves. Two foreetry reserve's Itaire been created by Orders-ia-Council, -to be known as Natignal Park Reserve and the Montagne 'Tremblante Park, Pro; vince of Quebec. The latter contains all the unsurveyed lands- of Geandison township, 'Terrebonne County and the former the lands ideated at the heads ot the IVIontmorency, Jacques Cartier nd Ste. Anne de la Peiade an poi - lions -of the Counties -of Chicautimi, Quebec'and Montinoreney. No timber eau be dut on -those -reserves °e'er the yearly production without` a *special permit from the Minister of Crown Lands. The Doric Was Greek to Him. One of the best of many go-ol stories dtby Mr. Will Fyffe (the Scottish comedien, -conceens countryman of his who wae on his first visit to 'Lon- don. Leaning over Blackfriars Bridge as dus was fallhig, he was astounded to see all the lights on the embank- ment flare up with. one accord as if by magic. He walked up to the nearest policeraan and .said in surprised tones: "Tell me, meanie, wha' lichted a' the The policeman scratched hie head the liehties-," repeated the visitor. • T -he ,policeman Was diuntfounded, and at laet courtesy fed from hie soul. "Garn, yer Portuguese blighter," lie ordered sharply. " 'Oppit!" Egg Ashleirth Certificate. A woman of Norwich, England, had an unusual birth certificate to offer as proof of her daughter's age, Tbe cer- tificate was a hen's egg"on which the name of the girl and the date of hee birth lied been engraved. I ndustrio us Boy. lit Mother ---"le your son incluS- 2nd Ditto—"le he! You never eaw a boy work so haled to /coal) from work- ing in all youglIfe!" Not necessarily ee'reet yeti can do