The Wingham Advance-Times, 1985-11-27, Page 17G
Croasroa.ds —No v. 27, 1985
1
eisure, features and entertainment
ay of Honor
ABOVE—Perth Veterans march
to the National Resistance
Monument in Sneek.
•LEFT—The National Resistance
Monument.
Agoraphobics
Prisoners'of the hom
AFTERNOON PROGRAM
During the afternoon new activities
kept the veterans busy, but it is safe to
assume that some took a little nap
after dinner. Others strolled around in
town on their own, familiarizing
themselves with its landmarks and
old' buildings. The "Waterpoort"
("Watergate", no connection, of
course, with Washington, D.C.) is
most picturesque. A good number of
the veterans toured the city by bus,
provided for that purpose by the town.
In the neighbourhood of Sneek lies the
little village of Ysbrechtum. Here a
visit was paid to an old castle, where
modern scions of ancient nobility have
their abode.
This trip to ancient Epema State
was not unlike a visit to a museum and
in its many rooms, hung with paint-
ings of forefaltlhers, seascapes and
ancient royalty, the veterans must
have imagined themselves in the
mysterious past.
' Later in the afternoon, in one off
Sneek's larger meeting halls by the
name of "Amicitia'.' ("friendship"),
an informal meeting between the'citi-
zens of Sneek and their Canadian
guests 'was scheduled.
This get -acquainted meeting allow-
ed the people of Sneek to get to know
their overseas friends better and en-
gage them in conversation as far as
the language barrier permitted. It
was 40 years since the Canadians,
young men then, were in town, and
now there were not too many citizens
left in Sneek who -had personal recol-
lections of the soldiers from overseas.
However, a few feeble men and
women, who in the days of, yore had
harbored young. Canadian military
men in theirvmostly humble dwellings,
were seen clutching the arm of their
"boy", whom they had not seen, in
most cases, for years and who by now
were often grandfathers themselves.
The eyes of those older citizens were
lighting upas if recalling the days of
liberation. What changes had oc-
curred during all those 40 years of
freedom, and what changes for the
better during all those years of peace.
And what a privilege to again lay eyes
on the heralds of peace and victory
over the forces of Nazism.
The main hall of "Amicitia" was al-
most too small to hold all the people.
There was much talking going on,
much of it confused and fragmentary,
but one thing was sure, great joy and
thankfulness were filling the hearts.
Some of the veterans from Canada,
being the centre of all the attention; •
were almost overwhelmed by this
show of popular acclaim.
By Kim Dadson
For 10 years of her life Shelley
Smith feared leaving her home. She
couldn't do the family grocery shop-
ping and a simple task, such as buying
shampoo at the local drug store was
impossible.
"There were lots of times I would
run back out of a store; or I would
leave a grocery cart half full and go
back home," Shelley admits. Today
she 'runs -the- family home -without-
_
problem and even 'has a job. Some-
thing she would never have been able
to do a few years ago.
Shelley suffered from agoraphobia,
the fear of leaving the safety of one's
home. It is not a simple fear that the
agoraphobic contends with — "You
get-.ho.l_flashes_a.n,d a real paw_
controllable panic. You think y
could pass out and you're just hanging
on for dear life. They call it a full
blown panic."
The Elmira housewife and mother
describes the terror of an
agoraphobic's life with clarity and is
very descriptive. After all, the mental
illness took 10 years of her, life and it
was largely through her own efforts
that she was able to journey back to
living a normal life.
It was first a letter in the syndicated
Ann Landers' column which led her to
a book by lir. Claire Weekes, "Hope
and Help For Your Nerves", and then
a radio program discussing the prob-
lem with others who suffered the
same affliction that started Shelley on
Agoraphobia is one of the phobias
that is not talked about or admitted to
by those who suffer from it, not like
the claustrophobic who freely admits
to hating small, closed -in spaces or
the next person who confesses a fear
of heights. •
In her book, Dr. Claire Weekes, MB,
D Sc., MRACP writes, " ... people
with agoraphobia rarely admit to
their condition. They will find excuse
after..excase-to_avoi.d_v i siting_ friends.,
going here, going there." •
In fact the doctor, who is best known
for her pioneering work in the study of
nervous illness and anxiety, has had
patients, " ... whose own husbands do
not know about it, so well have they
camouflaged their fears."
un Agoraphobics do not fear that some-
the journey back.
The book "was like reading about
myself; like the author knew me per-
sonally," and coupled with the radio
program, Shelley began to understand
her _problem and the fact that there
were many others ewhoo suffered TFie
same way. 1t is estimated that 100,000
suffer in England, according to Dr.
Weekes' book.
Understanding was the first step on
the road to recovery. "After four
years. everything clicked. The book
was my first catch."
thing specific, such as a car accident,
will happen to them, What Shelley
feared was fear itself — she feared
she would have a panic attack if she
went outside and her own fear created
the panic attack when she did venture
out — so she stayed at home.
In her book, Dr. Weekes explains,
"Since this woman is afraid of having
a spell when she is out, she is more
likely to have one when she is out he -
cause a spell is no more t.hah she, her-
self, frightening herself.
"How could she not panic when she
is so afraid of panicking? She pre-
pares the• way for panic before she
leaves the house."
Dr. Weekes writes in terms of "she"
because more women than men suffer
fi agoi aphnbra---Sfa-yi-ng- in—the
home to raise the family might set the
conditions which would allow the
phobia to develop. Men who suffer
from the illness are often home -town
bound. They may avoid promotions at
work; for instance, if, that promotion
will mean travel away from the work-
place where everything is familiar.
Agoraphobia is by no means just
another housewife syndrbme but a
very real illness.
Shelley found the medical commun-
ity lacking in support and knowledge.
Her doctor assumed she was a house-
wife complaining and prescribed
valium. "Soon, I couldn't look after
the children," Shelley says of the
valium.
There weren't too many.people who
did understand her condition. When •
she found the books by Dr. Claire
Weekes, she took them to a local
counselling centre were thecounsel-
lors admitted she knew more than
they did and they were eager for her
education. Today, with more publi
city, agoraphobia is being recognized.
Most people, if they don't know the
term, know of the illness. -
`-I-would-leave
a grocery
cart half full
and go back
home'
•
Shelley says an agoraphobic be-
comes an actor at avoiding situations
which could cause an attack. "You act
a part that's not you." When she was
out with the children and someone
would be walking towards her, she
would start talking to her children
about -being late.and-thaLtheY had bet-
ter hurry, thereby setting a scene that
she really didn't have the time to
stand and chat.
Although the children came in
handy as part of her act and as an ex -
c -use for .not stopping and talking, they
were also the reason she ventured out
of the house at all. She would force
herself out for a walk around the block
and had a crutch of sorts with a small
child in a stroller or in hand.
If people came to her home, the fear
of an attack would send her flying to
the washroom or a bedroom to. at-
tempt to calm down. Even Christmas
dinner with the family would have
been an ordeal some years. "It all
starts to mushroom," Shelley says.
The more she feared a panic attack
would occur, the more likely one
would happen and the more she, tried
to avoid the situations which might
precipitate one.
Shelley could go for days without
eating or just drinking coffee. Nausea
was another side effectof an_attack-. if r • she -thought, what- -if _that -happens_-to
she knew she was to attend a wedding me when I•'m not at home? "Y thought
shower, for instance, on a Tuesday I would have to get hold of this so I
night, she would stop eating on Mon- went out. And attacks do happen
day. As part of her act, she would ar- •which bring .you back home.
rive late at the shower and say that "At mylowest point, .1 wondered if I
her husband had to go out so she would was suicidal."
not be able to stay long. She would What actually causes agoraphobia
1 ave arty- when_she_fe.l.t she woulsl_is not known. -Shelley says a.strict up -
Serving over 20,000 homes
in Ontario's heartland
It is early in the evening, about 7
o'clock and we are still writing May 4.
The great Martini -Church of Sneek
looms high and forbidding against the
-0 gray sky. It is getting much cooler and
a damp, penetrating wind blows
through the, streets and around the
massive church walls. Preparations
are being made for the memorial
service at the monument in the lee of
the church, honoring Dutch resistance.
fighters who gave their lives in the
battle against Nazi tyranny.
Here it is called "Remembrance of
the dead". Barriers are set up to se-
cure enough space for the bands and
various organizations participating in
the ceremonies on this national re-
membrance day. Already a guard of
honor of former members of the "Re-
sistance" stands at attention, at the
monument. These men and those of
their comrades who cannot be here
now on account of age or infirmities,
played an important role in securing
the vital bridges around Sneek and
thus facilitated a quick advance by
the Canadian troops.
The impending memorial service
bears, in the first place, a national
character, where the Canadian veter-
ans as guests are taking a place of
honor. This is reflected in the march-
ing order of the parade lining up at the
town hall. It is led by the mayor off
Sneek and his wife. Beside them walk
his deputy and spouse, followed by
Lt. -Col. John S. Whyte of Stratford,
Ontario -and his wife. Beside Lt. -Col.
Whyte marches Mr. Jongejans, a
prominent citizen of Sneek and one of
the main organizers, accompanied by
his spouse.
After them we see the town ad-
ministrators and police authorities,
followed by representatives of re-
sistance. organizations. In their wake
come the veterans and their wives
preceded, by the regimental cere=
monial band. The rear is brought up
by town councillors and committee
members.
In the meantime the bands posted
nearby play with 'triumphal but sub-
dued elan a series of national tunes
beloved by .the people, many of whom
are humming along with tears in their
eyes.
The great crowd in the spacious
square around th&church strains to
get a good look at the parade which
presently comes into view. The pipers
of the ceremonial band attract much
attention and the wail of the bagpipes
fills the air.
A historic moment has arrived. A
young muSician marches up to the
monument and plays the "Last Post".
Continued on Page 2
"The two of us were suffering from
the same thing," Shelley recalls now
with an ironic laugh.
"I think you realize you have agora-
phobia when you are really small.
You've probably always had it and lit-
tle things could have sparked it. I
never was comfortable going out but
did so because my parents wanted me
to."
Her first attack ("It hits you like a
lead balloon.") happened at home and
have to go to avoid the attack. tooth
"Home is, like your prison. You hear
of people having this for 25 years! It's
almost like being a baby and starting
to walk again.
"It wiped out those years, from age
20 to 30." •
Shelley says some people who don't
understand the illness think 'a person
should just get out and get a job and
get living. It's like having a severe
case of the flu and being told to get out
of bed.
"You force yourself out, but it is
draining. Even getting up is hard
work. 1 would not be eating for days. If
your body is that run down, so is your
mind."
Shelley suffered her first attack
after she was married. Fortunately,
however, she is married to a man who
went ahead and did the shopping and
the errands for her. The illness did not
break up her marriage as she believes
it did to another couple they knew.
Shelley and the other wife were was happening low, day-to-day
talking on the -telephone one day be- process. taking a step forward and ac -
cause the two couples hadn't gotten cepting the setbacks when they came.
together. The wife told her that her For six years the phobia was at its
husband was house -bound, afraid to most severe but it was a 10 -year
go out and preferred to stay in his own period before Shelley felt free of the
home. phobia.
bringing is a common thread but ac-
cording to Dr. Weekes in "Peace from
Nervous Suffering", the cause is not
important.
"The basic cause of these attacks
has usually been fatigue, or some
other form of stress, following a
variety of experiences --- difficult con-
finement, debilitating illness. and 'so
on, Occasionally there .is no obvious
reason and happily I have rarely
found disclosing an original cause of
agoraphobia essential for cure."
Dr. Weekes advises the agoraphobic
to face the panic and accept what is
happening, not to fight it but allow it to
pass by. Tensing or fighting the panic
makes it worse and in fact is what
cre 'tes and increases the panic at-
tack.
"I have seen many patients cured
after more years of suffering than
some of you may have lived. So cheer
up!" Dr. Weekes writes.
For Shelley, it was recognizing what
..Iw...vwyw,...
777,7,
Even now she.ad'mits she wouldn't
want a job that confines her to one
desk or a certain place but likes the
freedom to walk around a bit on her
Own, a preference anyone could un-
derstand without being agoraphobic..
Today, Shelley appears to be an out-
going, friendly person who likeseto get
out and have a good time, whether it's
a dance or a quiet cthp of coffee with a
friend, events many of us take for
granted but which Shelley could not
enjoy for 10 years.
People
with
Agoraphobia
rarely
admit to
their
-condition
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