HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Goderich Signal-Star, 1977-12-29, Page 4PAGE 4—GODERICH SIGNAL -STAR, THURSDAY, DECEMBER 29, 1977
Year 5 students predict interesting 1978
Well friends, you will not he pleased to
learn that the upcoming year will not be
one of the hest we've ever. experienced.
Dot, as we all know, things must get worse
before they get better.
gI'o begin with, the vvhole North American
continent will he off to a had start. without
the help of Guy Lombardo to greet the New
Year.
Rene Levesque will again he in the
limelight. In 1978, he will be elected
president of the "Chain Smoki'rs
Association of North America. Mr.
Levesque will also succeed in his heroic
attempt to tear the country apart.
Things don't look too bright for)rur Prime
Minister in the upcoming year. Mr.
Trudeau again will be continuously nagged
by the Opposition Party, Rene Levesque,
wife Margaret, and, his ungrateful coun-
trymen. Before - the year is out, Mr.
Trudeau will have been committed to a
mental institution following an inevitable
nervous breakdown.
Canada's formerly respectable R.C,M.P.
will relocate "in California where they will
join forces with "Richard Nixon and
Company", to form a massive corporation
specializing in bugging, wire tapping, and
other scandalous activities.
From the consumer's point of view, 1978
doesn't look too promising either. Major
price increases in the arca of food, will
have an effect on most of our pocket books.
For example, three mainstays in most of
our diets, namely, peanut butter, sour
cream and onion potato chips and but-
termilk, will double in price. On the other
hand, our budgets will be significantly
relieved b; the fact that the price of dill
pickles will drop drastically.
Energy conservation again will be of
major concern to Canadians.
Premier Bill Davis in co-operation with
the "United Hamster Breeders of Ontario"
and a team of brilliant scientists, will
initiate . an ingenious energy creating
system. This system will provide power to
the entire City of Toronto on it's trial run
during 1978. The power will be generated by
thousands of hamsters (working in shifts),
which will run on treadmills. The final
result will be the powering of several large
generators located on the outskirts of the
city.
Goderich District Collegiate Institute will
pay little -heed to the government's efforts
and raise the heat in the school to an all
time high of 50 degrees F during the winter
months.
Undoubtedly, these predictions will be
very informative to the general public.
P.S. Any future validity of the above
predictions is purely coincidental.
Mary Anne Boyle
Our predictions for the new year consist
of five events that we feel will happen.
Our first prediction comes from the
sports world. Through much hard work
and discipline, Toronto Maple Leafs will
meet a totally astonishing and much im-
proved Vancouver Canucks in the first all -
Canadian Stanley Cup in years. Locally, a
couple of on-going feuds will be resolved
and started. The battle between
Kingsbridge, Kintail and Port Albert will
disappear and tl}s, three will unite to form
the thriving country of Port Kinalbridge.
This action will prompt Auburn, Don-
nybrook and St. Augustine to retaliate and
form their own country of St. Aubrookstine,
forcing a civil war to break out between
these two immature and rival countries.
Margaret Trudeau will win an Oscar for
her first movie role, prompting hubby
Pierre (that the P.M.) to star in a movie
based on his colourful life and rise to
power.
The G.D.C.I. students will initiate the
first Teacher of the Year award. The lucky
winner will be chosen by the Year four and
five students because they have had to put
up with him for the longest time. The five
finalists will probably be a variety like Mr.
Feavcr, Mr. Kalfleisc1h, Miss Doidge, Mr.
Carpenter, and Mr. Worsell. By the end of
June, a ballot will have been taken, similar\
to the vote of Homecoming Queen. One ofr
these lucky people mill be crowned King or
Queen Teacher and will receive gifts that
will suit the teacher's personality.
Finally, because of the recent success .of
Star Wars and science fiction films, there
will be an influx of aliens from another
galaxy wanting to participate in sequels.
Also their purpose will be to set the record
straight about their way of life in outer
space°.They have been watching for thirty
or forty, years and through these movies,
they have become totally disillusioned over
the earth's concept of space.
These are our predictions despite the
absurity of them.
R. Crawford
F. Hildebrand
The year that is rapidly drawing to a
close saw many of the predictions from 1976
come true. The same will probably hold
true for 1978, concerning ^this year's
predictions.
The Canadian political scene in 1978 will
remain unsettled and turbulent. Quebec
separatism will be the major national issue
with Quebec introducing its own anthem,
"Oh Rene Levesque, we leave Canada for
thee." The Montreal Canadians will, of
course, be renamed the Montreal
Quebecois.
Parliament, however, will have more
immediate concerns when the Prime
Minister is kidnapped by a band of militant
bee keepers while cuba diving in his
swimming pool.
1978 will also be a tumultuous year in-
ternationally. A severe drought will result
in a world-wide shortage of dill pickles.
Riots and mass hysteria will follow as
shoppers battle over jars of dills. The
problem will be partially alleviated by the
invention of a substitute - dill peanuts.
Dill peanuts will only be the first of a long
line of new inventions. The most famous
will be the manure -gas converter (MGC).
This device will revolutionize Canadian
agriculture as farmers turn to full-scale
manure production with food as a by-
product. Theft of manure will be
punishable by a 10 -year prison sentence or
5 weeks solitary confinement in a chicken
barn with_10,000'chickens.
Considering everything, 1978 looks like a
promising year for psychiatrists if nothing
else,
Anne Marie Howard
Each time a new year beings people
predict things that they are sure will come
about. Every year has its surprises and
disappointments. The year 1978 will be no
different in these aspects. Using great
foresight and intuition, I predict the
following things for 1978:
1) When the drinking age is raised from
eighteen to nineteen, teenagers will not
start getting drunk until they are fourteen
instead of thirteen.
2) In an election, which will be held this
summer, Margaret Trudeau will lead the
Communist party of Canada to victory.
3) The Toronto Maple Leafs will win the
Stanley Cup!
4) Jimmy Carter will challenge Farrah
Fawcett to a smiling contest and it will be
called a draw because of the glare in the
judge's eyes.
5) Howard Cossell will forget all words
longer than four syllables and become
completely mute because of this.
6) The Fonz will commit suicide after
losing his leather jacket.
7) At high school, marks will be
eliminated and teachers will only pass the
students who bring them apples.
8) It will snow next December.
9) A terrorist group will kill all the
members of the rock group, Kiss. They will
be found not guilty since they were acting
in the best interest of mankind.
10) The high school newspaper, The GDC
Eye, will force the Signal Star into
bankruptcy and later out of circulation.
Since the above predictions come from a
highly reputable source they are to be
termed totally ridiculous,
Tim Doherty
eNA
Godericthe
h
_SIGNAL STAR
The County Town Newspaper of Huron
Founded In 1848 and published every Tin rsday at Goderich, Ontario. Member of the CWNA
and OWNA. AdvortisIng rates on request. Subscriptions payable In advance '13.00 in
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tIsing rates available on request. Please ask for Rate Card No. 8 effective Oct. 1, 1977,
Second class mall Registration Number 0718. Advertising Is accepted on the condition that,
in the event of typographical error, the advertising space occupied by the erroneous Item,
together with reasonable allcwance for signature, will not be charged for but the balance
of t e advertisement will be paid for et the applicable .rote. In the event of a
typ graphical error advertising goods or services et a wrong price. goods or service may
no be sold. Advertising is merely an offer to sell. and may be withdrawn at any time. The
SI nal.Star is not responsible for the loss or damage of unsolicited manuscripts or photos.
Business and Editorial Office
TELEPHONE 524-8331
area code 519
Published by Signal -Star Publishing Ltd.
ROBERT G. SHRIER — president and publisher
SHIRLEY J. KELLER — editor
EDWARD J. BYRSKI — advertising manager
Mailing Address:
P.O. BOX 220, Industrial Park, Goderich
Second class mail registration number — 0716
Reflections
The following is editorial comment
written by Paul Harvey.
+++
One good example is worth a thousand
admonitions.
A year ago in one of my broadcasts I
talked about how Texas was•reducing its
welfare overload by requiring anybody
able to work - to work.
Now 17 states, one way or another, are
putting relief recipients to work.
"And the federal government's "Work
Incentive Program" is finding more jobs
for welfare recipients - twice the number
last year than during all of the previous
four years. •
Some cities, on their own, are unloading
the goldbricks.
RBridgep'ort, Conn., now requires em-
ployable people on welfare to work one or
two days a week. If they fail to work for two
weeks - no more welfare.
In one year Bridgeport's case load has
been reduced by 45 percent - a million
dollars' saving to the city's welfare budget.
Milwaukee County, Wis., requires all
able -bodies welfare applicants -to accept
city or county jobs at $2 an hour.
In the state of New York since last May,
all employable persons on welfare have
been required to work three days a week in
a local government agency. We don't have
a head count yet, but many are going out
and finding a full-time job instead. That, of
'course, is the objective.
In Utah. where the largely Mormon
population uses the highly effective LDS
welfare system as a model, results are so
impressive that the Carter Administration
may use th.is as a template for national
welfare reforms.
Here is the Utah plan; Anybody drawing
welfare payments is put to work. This in-
cludes mothers on ADC. And this Utah plan
is the first such ever to he approved by the
HEW.
In.Utah, if private employment cannot he
found for able-bodied welfare recipients,
they are put to work in state or local
government jobs. 'They may be teacher's
aides in neighborhood schools or they may
plant.. trees in public parks. But the only
welfare recipients excused from work are
the ill, the aged, the disabled, or mothers
with children under six.
All others are told to take jobs or lose
their welfare payments,
July through December last year 782
persons were assigned to the work
program. The 311 who refused to work were
dropped from welfare rolls; 218 promptly
found other kinds of employment. Leaving
only a fraction of the original 782 still
dependent on welfare.
And communities benefit from the
available work force. In Salt Lake_ City
there was money to purchase insulation for
the homes of elderly poor people but no
labor with which to install the insulation.
Welfare trainees were assigned to the job.
Oklahoma's Governor David L. Boren
initiated a law requiring anyone 18 years of
age or older in a family receiving ADC to
visit the local employment office and sign
up for any job available. Hundreds accept
permanent jobs, instead.
And what the statistics cannot rcfl^rt iq
the number of persons in these states who
never apply for welfare, realizing that they
will he required to work for it.
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On drivers
Dear Editor,
Some drivers entering the
Square await not only
pedestrians on the left half of
the marked intersection but
invite persons on the right
sidewalk to step down and
cross in front.
I wish these drivers would
read the relevant sections of
the Ontario Traffic Act and be
governed thereby.
Benevolent variations,
besides holding up traffic, are
hazardous; the next driver
along may be one of the
impatient ones, merely
checking speed at the
crossing and charging
through.
PEDESTRIAN
Needs help
Dear Editor,
I am in the process of
researching my family tree.
As part of that search I am
looking for information on my
grandfather, Ernest Arthur
Mitchell, who was horn in
Goderich in 1881 (exact date
not known).
It occurred to me that your
newspaper, which I un-
derstand to be quite old, may
DEAR E
have information regarding
the birth of my grandfather in
the old issues.
Consequently, I would
appreciate it if you could
advise me if the back copies
(year 1881) are available?
Are they on micro -film? If so
where?. Are they available for
inter -library loan?
In lieu of micro -film could a
search of the birth notices for
1881 be conducted? If so how
much would it Cost?
Also, 1 am interested in
knowing the name of any
local genealogy -history
groups, or individuals who
might be able to help me.
Additionally, any general
local history information you
might reference me to would
he most appreciated.
Thank you in advance for
your very kind attention to
this matter.
Sincerely yours,
Gerald Mitchell,
863 Lakewood Drive,
Sunnyvale, California,
94086.
You're invited
Dear Editor,
Calling all former students
of the Fort Erie Secondary
School home to the town that
skirts the border to mark the
50th anniversary of the
school, May 12 and 13, 1978!
D
Mark the date on . your
calendar and pass the word
on to as many other former
students as you can.
ITDr
Tentative plans include a
reunion dance, golf, a
"memories" reception at the
school and several other
activities. Mather Public
School is, as well, celebrating
its 50th anniversary and it is
planned that May 12-14 will be
turned into a real 11Old
Home" weekend.
Your help is needed,
though, to make this event a
success.. Those interested in
attending are asked to con-
tact the Reunion '78
Secretary, Mrs. M. McMillen
at the school, Tait Avenue,
Fort Erie, Ontario L2A 3P1,
(416) 871-4610, as soon as
possible.
The reunion committee also
invites parents, relatives and
friends of former students to
write these people and urge
them to contact the school.
We aren't promising any
cannon firings at Old Fort
Erie, but we're sure all
former students will get a
"bang" out of this 50th an-
niversary reunion.
N.L. Pring,
Fort Erie
New column
Dear Mrs. Keller,
Sometime ago in our
;correspondence I mentioned
the possibility of a short
column on an intermittent
basis in the Signal -Star,
dealing with promoting the
sister city relations between
Bay City and Goderich as
well as informing Goderich of
any Bay City general news of
interest.
I'm sending the attached as
a possible first, since I did
have several items to bring to
the attention of your readers.
These columns, as I've in-
dicated, would not be on a
regular basis, only con-
tributed gratis whenever I
have something to report.
I'm fully in -your corner
after the Signal -Star's recent
editorial — the exchanges
should be 7built into full
community support whereby
every club, church, women's,
school and other civic groups
are participating. ' And
perhaps the newspapers will
have to take the lead in this
promotion.
My Saturday column in The
Bay City Times today carries
many Goderich items, gained
by reading the Signal -Star
which you so graciously sent
me for a year. And upon
expiration date, there wi
a check there in 1978
renewal. You are to
congratulated on a we
paper of high quality, o
the finest I've seen.
With Christmas and
Year's greetings to you
yours, as well as the
other fine friends I've
this past year in Goderi
am,
Since
Leslie E°A
1977 Presi
Bay City People -to -Pe
Also Copy Editor -Colum
The Bay City, MicTihi
Editor's Note: Mr. A
column appears elsewhe
this newspaper and dese
reader attention. —SJK
The real spirit
Dear Editor,
One day this week
shopping in one of our st
I saw something happen
makes one believe the
Christmas spirit is not at
An elderly lady th
very little sight left, ha
clerk checking or Christ
her purs
money to pay buying for
gifts she was buy g
family, and was $5.00 sho
A very kind lady at
Turn to pag
75 YEARS AGO
Mr. Thos. E. Durnin of
Dungannon was a caller at
the Star office this week and
announced that he was in the
field for County Councillor to
stay. Mr. R. Jewell and Mr.
John McKenzie have both
resigned the rromination and
this leaves hut three
aspirants in the field.
On January 5 every
freeholder will he asked to
vote on a bylaw passed by a
former council hut which was
never completed, granting
exemption from taxi,tion for
the balance of a term of ten
years to the Goderich Knit -
LOOKING BACK
ting Company, Ltd. and the
Goderich Lumber Company,
Ltd., two progressive and
prosperous industries who
are large employers of labor
with a heavy pay list.
Frank Lawrence says he
never saw SQ large an express
business any previous
Christmas and the Post
Master states that letters and
parcels received - are ex-
ceedinglylarge.
A considerable quantity of
corn was shipped from the
elevator this week to
Seagram of Waterloo.
25YEARSAGO
On Thursday evening the
members of the Goderich
District Collegiate Institute
Board met at the home of
vice-chairman H.M. Ford
and presented him with a
coffee table as a personal gift
from the members in
recognition of the outstanding
work he had done for the
board as chairman of the
building committee in charge
of the construction of the new
Collegiate.
On December 16, the
Auburn Athletic Association
and Community feted the
champions of the Midget D
baseall series, who won the
W.O.A.A. and the O.B.A.
championships.
At a special meeting at the
Town Hall on Monday af-
ternoon, Town Council ap-
pointed John Gardner as its
representative for the 1952-53
Board of Trustees of G.D.C.I.'
5 YEARS AGO
The shipping season at the
local waterfront closed of-
ficially last week with the
arrival of the grain boat
Agawa Canyon.. George
Parsons, president and
general manager „o;f the
Goderich Elevator and
Transit Company said
had been .an average
The number of hushes
wheat handled(9,768'
slt
was down only . g
ly
recent years.
Judge R . Betheri°
administered the oath
allegiance to 12 new CanB
citizens Dece of their er 1�i
large group
and family members.
Of the 578 dog tags
1972 by Animal Cot
Officer Dick Eisler'
seven were female
emal1 went �s
ogs
remaining
dogs at $4 per tag.