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Exeter Times, 1916-7-27, Page 5Y. JULY 27th, 1910 THE EXETER TIMES Crediton aro. Ofiehael Beaver is at preeent ion the sick lien IMessre Chris, heist and O. MeIstiae abeetored to Goderich jest Sunday. A Mr. and Oita, Sol. 'Beaver of San - *Insley are visaing. friends iu town Miss Ida Voellter, ot Pigeon Is spe.ading a few deye at the home of J. F. Stealth. 'Don't forget the union S. S. Picnic Vgeditoxt and &rich to 'he bold on :Iteriday, July 28th, Jr. end Mrs. If. J Kuhn4 N.r.S. V, Brown. and Mts. G. Brown mot- ored eo ,Berlin last SundaY. The Ittissen Uncle, Shenk, "Clara NiirdOlara ifoltzman are visiting Wends at. Goderich this wer/k. (Decoration Day was observed at the Dreditou cemetery last Sunday. Rev. „pocket preached a •short ,sertnon :after which the male chorus rendered .0. selectioa, then all 'began decorating eathe graves of the lovedgems . The Sunday school 13t0321.0 in cootect- ion with the Methodist alluvial has .srn account of the 'very busy time bean postponed until a weak frona !Chute - idea? L e. Alogust Ord, 1916. . The Sunday school picot° in congeo- elan with •Ebenezer Appointment: will tie held on Saturday July 291h, Chiselhurst Mr, Wm. Pybue had a succeleerui, Otani raising recently. .WOrktuan have .heen besy ertictieg a pito for John ,Rcherteon. . Many' from this,. part attended the eaggaldiat. 'bee and dance on the farm of gohlt Ttell Usborne, • Some a the sold:ere were home from Vamp Bordon and expressed themeel- Ares as being 'anything but eatsficel ovith camp he. A. very 'enjoyable time eves <inept ont the lfarm of Mr, and Mrs. D. Me Naughton-, when at th.eir inv:tation ia.bout 175 people gathered fax an O ld time barn dance. Supper was ser - vied let 12. D. m. after dancing was re - :teamed with mint vigor and kept go • ing urxtil .thc enirly moriOne Hensall fhla. and `Mire, C. A. McDonnell were arisititor in Foreet and Sarnia. • Mrs. Drake has returned home from 'Vittoria Hospital, very mach improv - tea from tile 611e.ration she underwent !there. and Mrs. James. Logan have re- terned to Windsor after attending het- ialays with their _relatives, and friend.; in "loosen.. Miss Flooste .Bonthron of Toronto. 4whe h, studying for a moon at the, 'Western hospital, le home for a coin- .110aa weeks (vacation. Our council arc grading a road to Ate Park Grounds recently so kindly e'en.' ',donated by M.r. Ono Moir and in.teud /leaking it a nice park. Mils. Geo. al:On-tyre of 2t. Stan- ley, is visiting her mother, Mrs. J. Bpar1>4. Miss Eiger os Brantford is ;else visiting Mrs. Sparks. Mr. 'Case Troy r. and bride of Glen- ctee., en:' reeontly cn their home-- moo/4 trip. and sten'. a few days with their, many ,erilat iv es ..and friends. pr A E. ALkenhead ;:rol Mrs. Aik- -pithead End eartdren of Caigary, Atte, formerly of Hensall, spent a iew alays her. recently with thelr mane ▪ friend; who were pleased to ece them. Mr. and Mrs. James Boathron and dittio son haw returned to their home '5n the West after a pleasant vie't evith their friends and eelatives. Mr. illonthron is a railway conclacter run- ing• on the Edmonton branch. A. laree number from Hewett and the vicleity :attended the funeral of the late ;Om. Glenn of- Tuckersmitlt who had only been aeriously ill from -an attaele of pneumonia for a Lew aA, and was well and favorably ,Oggevn in Hensell and the vicinity. Oats day ireoeutly as little Ray Pfeil: -aeon. of Mr. W. E. Prate was play:ng with %some other little bay.s around Wee katheins tile machinery, he got Alis arm calight in the machine, break - Ong it very belly about the ,elbow, atoned of tbe bones protruding and be- ing crushed Medical aid quickly aura - =tined and the little lad underwont Otte painful dressing v•cry bravely. On •Tuesday,of last week Alex. Me - .Pherson, one of abenealle oldest and most es tee me cl bossiness men, died. life had teen a resident alBensitil kir nearly thirty years, conducting a ianerchanttallorinee business. Prior to that he had lived in Dungannon. lIe took a great interest in church work and was tot years an elder in Carmel SChureh, and for setae time Sunday school superintendent. Hes death has broken cne of the links between the old. and the you.ng b ilensall. Zurich and Mrs. Jacob Smith of Det - 'knit are vieiting relatives here. M''!'13.1”931S, ;'!,karted on the lbric4t work of 'Mr. Wm. 'Ruby's hoese Oak litimor 'WI II, of. Montreal, ited hie parents, Mr. and lefr lrer- len in Well fur a few days. etres,see /toy :el, Geiger and Alvin sSurerue have left for Toronto, whole they will joim tits signtling corps. Mr. John eelarteht is biley extgati- eed re-ceristiuctine his dwelling.. Ile 1.. Tbuildtng it; furtner back fx-ain the :da -walk. 'ir. HarxisonBecker had cbarge o2 the ntorn'eg and ;sweeter e .rvires iti te va lical choral, 'Sunday. Tho :Patter. l'eee ,F. ee, letuyer and family . , etre vtseteet in Walkervifie. Me. and Cans. Clearlee lechstein ii eetaneane with the latter's sister, %an. MaixP f re /13 Bowling G re e Ohio, motored nver with the'r ear -end spent ,a vieittnee 'Mr. and lairs, Moses Geiger. • A real estatt deal of SOIEUt import - mune ivas pet throegh Wee reby 'Qtr. T. Enlesoe, Estsr, of the Iltmettn Line, Staeenr, takes a he It aisectien . lend in Sae!, atebewten in exchange for is Jirni in Stanleytownship eeletca lecceases the property* tte Mr. ateeert Doeglea, of Sala teen, Polo, veteenn meth. -eassee to be •given in l'elet miry, _ Shipka efr, Fred Geiser is we the Rick fist. Mies Mabel, and 'Catherine 4VIeLitiao have returned home from Drysdater• Mies Katie afcCathin oe Mt, Plea - ant, Mich, is visiUwiaL here hotaao. MO. and Mrs, John 'Dietrick and nullity visited friends ill Zurich on Sunday. Mass. IL Statham and 'Mtge Ethei Lynch eatled on 'friends in Exeter last week. Oar. and Iles. John Gooding spent Sanclay at, the home oa Mr. A. Good- ing at Moray, Messrs Herbert and John Lynch and sister &het visited Miss Vera Luther at PL. •Beeke on Sunday. Mrs. hired Reding and neioe Mies Sadie MoCathio, have returned honaie eater spetidieg a r:OW days withrela- tives in innerk.ep. • Dashwood BIrs. jaok E•idt is ill with an attack of tonsalitis. Mies Maide Routledge vlsited friends in Mitchell last week. Die, Wes. Gritser or Camp Boracn is visiting at tin home here, 'bliss Matilda fi11er is ,visitIng in Detroit with re la tires this weok.„- Mies LilyR. Ifoffnaan oli Tavirstock Ls visiting Wanda and relativesahere, Pitildreraa Dag se,rvioeo will ibe held Ln the Evangelical 'church here Suri - da. • Rev. ihrtioat of Warthary will •ceto duct the morning and 'evening ser- vices at the Lu.therita church here on Sunday., Mr. of PinclitirOCreek. Alta., land Mr. • and Mrs. Herman aoninee or Radison. Sask., are visit- ing their .parents here. Thames Road . . Mr. and Mrs. 'Wm. Wilkinson visit- ed friends h,e.re last Sunday. Pies. Robt. Passmore end Monne; Wilkinson dre &one for a little Mx'. and Mrs. 'Herald Lawrence of Seaforth were in the neighborhood on Sunday last. Wheat harvest has begun and, hay- ing is finished, tame of the :hoeing is still to be done. ' . Elimville Rev. Oluxwarthy of Exeter ex- changed pulpits with Rev. Barnard, of ,Elimvillo on Sunday ...last. Our farmers are cuttingiswheat to- day. Therie is a groat tided ot retire as we hare had no wain fon four wenke Quito a number of our sole:tiers . of this ,vicinity .have returned aretu Vamp Borden Cor a montle ro help the farmers during the harvest. Among the n onber axe Ptes. Earl Johns, Jackson Wood, 'aVtal Veal, Ed. Kellett, Wellington lietten,..Koo- dat J. , Grace 03ranardnempil of Miss 'Mary Herta, oli Elimville, has returned home after epee-Id:tag two weeks in London and tryng her exami.nations at the Landon. Conservatory a Music. Brace has succeeded in pa snointhe 3rd neer in pioneforte, re:geared by 'the 'L. C. Ontagio. also Ogee grade theory both with honors. Greenway Ones Mau.4 .Brosva ie eery ill with the measles. Lieut. W. T. Diens .js :home tor a few days from Cerup Barden. Mrs. A. W. Thompson end children of Winnipeg are the guests of her mother lerns. Jos. Foster. Missee May and A.dah iBoogins of Toronto aro the guests of their par- ents, Mr. and Mrs. J. a. liodeOne. We notice the names ,of tRobort Love, Lillian Liens, Laelja Curtis, Lillie Bell .and Grave Mason among the succeseful lentrance popils and, extend our congra t ulations 164. and Mirs. R.:Pollock at Ker - wood, Mize Emma McPheneen of Lon- don and Pte. Will McPherson of •C,arnp Borden spent the we..1h end with their parents itIr. and 'Mrs. E. Mc Pherson, Mrs. T. Harlton an aged resident of this section died last week at the ihome of her daughter Mrs. Jos. Hickey. She had been III for sonic time so her death IledS 1101. unexoected She was highly respected ley a large circle of friends and ocgaaintances. end was a faithfal member itC the Methodist church here. 'Rev. H. W11- liams conducted the .funeral iservieete at tbe house on Thursday and the remains were interred in tbe Parkhdl cenietiery. She *Ives Po mourn her loss five eons, Samuel, l'homae, Ger- shon, .Elijah and Herbert Otnd two claaghters. Mrs, 3. Jackion and Mrs, J. Hickey. Death again visitea our !neighbor- hood on Tharsdn.er night end anotber aged xesident in the person of Orre. Prance passed to the great beyond. She had been ill hut 'a short time With measles and bronchitis [so her death wee quite a ebock to her fam- ily and a large trunber of friends who have kindly ,mernories heel as a loving mother. a good nsighbor faitantl. ebtarch member and a true friend. her funeral ileervic,e was held at her own hoin on Sueday afternoon and was toedacted by be pastor Bev. H. 'Willie tna the ineerr- me n t I.Xting in J?arkkiU no me tarty tier ausband pre-deceasod her enme e ears alp and slot ,heaves to rueuret her loss, two eons Wileam. and John Children Cry FOR FLETCHER'S °ASTORIA HIS FORMAL REPRIMAND, It Was Not Exactly the Kind He Wee Asked to Administer. Dr, Simon Parvin, an English clergy - Mali, was at (luxe absurdly absent, minded, Onee while be was visiting in the borne of a very great lady who employed a large staff of servants, wbOti she kept under extremely rigid control, it chanced thin two young footmen fell out about a pretty lomat- maid who had coquetted witb botti and so far forgot themselves as te en- gage in fisticulTs. Tbe old countess was indignant. Her first intention was to dismiss the, culprits, but they Were excellent servants, and, more- over, tbe repetitant maid tearfully in- terceded for them, Tbe countess re- lented sO far as to reduce the sentence to a formal reprimand before the oth- er servants -a reprimand in the na- ture of a moral lecture to be duly ad- ministered by her distinguisbed guest. At her earliest request -she was her- self conflned to ber room by gout -- Dr, Parvin, a man of imposing pres- ence and resonant voice, permitted himself to be escorted to the servants' hall. On his return she sent fax him to come to her chamber to relate the reeult of his mission. "A fine couple," said Dr. Parvin. "1 should say. an excellent match." "Match?" iagOired the countess. "What neaten? Has the silly girl made tie her mind between them, then? I vow, I thought she meant to jilt tbem both; and serve the boobies right. Pray tell me, bow did John and Thomas receive thcar reprimend?" "John? Thomas? Reprimend?" echoed Dr Parvin vaguely; then. with a sud- den dismaying flasb of memory: "Dear me, I fear I have made a singular mis- take! Wben I entered the room the younger servants were at the fax end in a group, and thebutler and bouse- keeper were together, quite near, im- mediately in front of me. in fact, standing side by side, an -in short, milldam, 1 inarried them!" Be had, indeed; but. although aston- ished, they were fortunately not un- willing. They had, it happened, long been contemplating matrimony and were deterred only by fear of tbe coun- tess' disapproval. Believing that she would not disapprove the act of her eminent guest, they bad readily abet- ted Dr. Parvin in .his error. The countess was angry, but her anger fell chiefly upon the absentminded divine. 'She gave him a piece of her mind that -if he had been any one else -he would not easily have forgotten. - Youth's Companion. Two Ways of Studying Musi* Picture to yourself a little girl of seven or eight seated before that pon- derous and portentous mass a iron, steel, wood, wires and bammers which we call a "pianoforte" (sixty pounds of tender, delicate humanity trying to express itself through a solid ton), her legs dangling uncomfortably in space, her little fingers trying painfully to find the right key and at the same time to keep in a correct position, struggling hard the while to relate to- gether two strange things, a curious black dot, on a page and an ivory key two feet below it, for neither of wbicb she feels much affeetion. And then picture to yourself the same child at its mother's knee or with other chil- dren singing with joy and delight a beautiful song -Thomas Whitney Su- rette in Atlantic. A Matter of Money. A wealthy stoclthroker who gave an imposing dinner. says tbe London Tele- graph, dilated with much pride, but with mangled English. on the deficit - cies that be had provided. Everything in season and out of season. be de- clared. was at the disposal of his guests. • "I notice yob have no nspirntes,° ob- served one of them quietly. "No more I 'ave," replied the stock- broker, ivitb crestfalien visage. "but if money can get 'em," he added, "111 'ate some of the best in the market next time you're 'ere." Not t� Be Pitied. Pat (to Milto-i got a letter from a friend. elike-Yes? Pa t- He says: "Every rib's gone, l've only one shouhler. and I expect my legs will be gene by the time yon get this letter." Mike -Poor fellow! ls he in a hos- pital in Fraece? Pat -No; he's in a butt hers shop, - Machu nge. Mexican Deauties. ,The most' beautiful ;rumen In tbe svorld ere said by experienced end ob eervent travelers io li t he bean wo men of the isthians of Tebnanteeee. which lies just north of Orientate 10 Mexico 'They adel to their pletureeque ettraetiveness t,y wearing wit:neve/ fort 11110 they May possess in the form of gold coies strung about the arms 111111 neck. THE !w-EsTErtN FAIR September 8th to 16th London's popularr Exhibition prom- isee to bo better patronized than ever. this year. ,The mana,getnent is plann- ing larger end better things for Sep- ternbetr met than nave ever been un- dertaken _tefore. The new Process Building promises to be a hive of in- dustries and conticlerable space is al - 'ready taken, A new s,estem of ad- mission at the gates will be adopted. ti3r alletlITS Or .ns?w coin titrnstyles. :Change booths will toke the place of tiaket booths and the public will be admitted 'by depositing twenty-five ceete at the turestylee Children and tamed holding tiekets w'll be admitted through a Waal, gate for • tbe par - pose, nt space at any kind is required application ohoald be made 'to the Seeretarse at team, tingelists end all thenormatioe on application to the fioc,rpt.a, ; it topno Onte ' • 5: French Canada and the War 1/EXEC'S failure to send bei sons to the war in any e00.• aiderable numbere lots at- tracted tho attention of xna.ny American tiewspep- ers, which contrast Quebec's apathy with the wonderful enthusiasm and loyalty displayed in other parts of Canada, says The 'roma° Mail and Empire In an editorial article. Last Sundays' New York Times published an article entitled "Priests Block lle.- cruiting in Quebec.," and discussed the situation there from the point of view of an outside Investigator. Ttic writer got much of his information frora Canon Huard, of the Basilica ut Quebec, who was for 25 years a pro- fessor in the Catholic College at Chi.- coutirai, and who has also some note as a scientist, being editor of the Canadian Naturalist, and Provincial Entomologist. In the course of ts. chat with Canon Huard the clerie made no concealment of the fact that the priests were discouraging recruit- ing in Quebec. He saw nothing dis- creditable in the admission, and was quite frank in stating the airns of the bilingualists and nationalists of his native province. The writer for The Times atity's that in the cities of Montreal and Quebec the priests are calling atten- tion to the fact that men aro needed at the front, but most of them are doing it in so perfunctory a manner that there is little response to tleeir lukewarm admonitions. In the coun- try regions the parish priests are for the most part telling their parisbion- ers that they should not fight for other people who are denying the French people in Ontario the right to have their children taught French. The reference is, of course, to the bilingual issue, and, it is the com- mon perversion of the bilingnalists to say that the people of Ontario are depriving French-Canadians in this province of certain rights. The Time 'correspondent says that in the rural districts of Quebec a wink or a mere hint from a priest has more effect than the most uritent call from Ottawa or the most elognent appeal from a recruiting sergeant. ft is difficah to understand Canon Huard's sentiments from the follow- ing remarks: As to the 'war," he said, "we are not telling our young men to enlist because we do not think there is any obligation on the individnat in Canada to fight in France. -Of conrse, we aro proud to be British subjects. It is a great Eat - pine. and England is generous to us when we cannot get justice fro% Canada- But we do not love Eng- land_ We have great affection for France, but not for the'Prench Gov- errem.ent. Wo make a distinction there.. We love Quebec. We would fight ler Quebec." It is to be ob- served that there is no expression of love for Canada, and a strange fail- ure to under:nand that Quebec must be fought for in France if it is to be fought for :at all, unless Canon Huard and other racialists in Quebec suppose that in the event of a Ger- mau victory Quebec -would receive some mark of the Kaiser's favor as a reward for failure to display any hostility- to him while the war was in progress. Canon Huard send that the reason he and other bilingualiets insist upon the use of the French language in Ontario is because it is necessary to hold the children to the Catholic faith_ "Experieoco has taught us that the Church loses when its Peo- ple are obliged to use some languagt other than. its own, and to mingle with people of another language and faith. If the Irish in the United States had a language 'of their own we would have 2&,000,000 Catholics in that country. As it is, I believe, we have only about 1 0.000,000. We teach English in the Quebec schools, but the people have 310 use for it, andetherefore forget it. We give the children schooling up to 10 or 12 years of age. They learn to read and write and figttre enough to keep theta farm accounts. Then they go to work. Tbey have enough education to read their prayer books and their newspaper on Sundays, and that is sufficient for those who have to stay on the farm." He went on to point out the danger of educating young men and the perils of High schools. They would result in making youths discontented with farm life, and would drive them to the cities, where they would find it difficult to obtain employment. Quite a different point of view was that of Rev. N. W. Bergeron, of Ogdensburg, a French-Canadian by birth. Invited to preach in his native village of Les Embouleraents, he scandalized his hearers by advising them to learn the English and educate their children so that they would have a chance in the world with the Protestants and with English-speaking Catholics. He also advised them to refuse to spend their hard-earned money in the building of magnificent new churches, for *hich there was xto use. The nines' corre- spondent spoke with people who told him that Quebec would be glad of an opportunity to secede from Canada without bloodshed, and he met others who assured him that actual civil war was a probability if the French claims with regard to their langhage in Ontario were not recognized. in the Lower Province there are high hopes that the Judicial Committee of the Privy Council Will uphold their contention regarding bilingualient 111 the schools of Ontario.. Winding It Up. Sir Frank Lockwood was one re- examining a client in regard to var- lois con:wattles) a geed many of nhich had been Wound ttp. The Automatic Musical nistraments Com- pany came uP for notice. --ea company for utilizing a, kind of street -organ piano. "That," Said Sir Prank, gene alloyow, MULE SVGA'S. • Canadian Product Malting Big ; Strides in Peeve, Abroad. The maple stager iadustry seems In a fair way to profit by the war. Eitherto this teothsomeluxury was but little known in Great Britain and practically unknowa. on tne Con- tinent. Small quantities were ship- ped from here to friends or were specially ideported by Canadians re- sident on the other side, but it was never handled by dealers and it was uselese to ask for it in the grocers' and confectioners' shops. Now a different state of affairs exists, The Influx in England and France of Canadians who have gone over to uphold the flag has created quite a demand, and the Duchess of Con- naught's Christmas gift a year' ago of a cake of maple sugar to every Canadian soldier across the sea brought it to the notice of many who 'fled never heard of it before. More- over a company was formed in Eng- land some time ago to handle Cana- dian products and among those it was decided to take up was maple sugar and maple syrup. As a result of these various influences quite a demand has been created fax it and this spring dealers in Montreal have contracted to thip fifty tons to Eng- land and forty tons to France. This is but the beginning of what it is hoped will develop into an extensive and profitable trade, for once the merits of maple sugar are properly appreciated in Europe it should ted a ready and ever increareng sale. The United States market also of- fers great possibilities. There was formerly a duty of four cents -a pond on mapleesugar but sbortly after the Democratic party came into power this was reduced to three cents. On the first of next May this duty will be removed altogether and Cana- dian maple sugar will then have free entry into the United States. Even with the duty in force some sixty cars a season have been shipped across the border and with an open roarket this sbeuld be grcaittY in- creased. Tbe prices that are being received bg Canadian producers this year are about ten per cent. better than last year. One of the largest maple pro- ducts concerns in Montreal has con- tracted to pay 90 cents ,a gallon in bulk for No. 1 syrup, 85 cents for No. 2, and 75 cents for No. 3, the company paying the freightoboth on the shipment and on the returned empty packages. The industry is undoubtedly cap- able of wonderful development in Canada. At present the total pro- duction is about 22,000,000 lbs. fax the whole Dominion, of which the Province of Quebec furnishes about. two-thirds, This could easily be trebled or quadrupled, for only about a third. of the available trees are tap- ped now and the methods followed by many producers are responsible for great waste. The Quebec Govern- ment recognizes thelivalue of the in- dustry and its possibilities, and has taken steps to encourage it as far as possible. There are now three schools for sugar -makers in the province, one at Beauceville in Beauce county, one at La Minerve in Labelle county, and one a,t Village anesaultd:04 in Ljslit, and a fourth will shortly be opened at Portneuf. These schoolsNwhich are operated by the Provineial De- partment of Agriculture with tile aid of the Dominion Government's Agri- cultural grant, are in charge a com- petent instructors, have up-to-date equipment, and employ the most' ap- proved sanitary methods. The in- struction is free and that it is high- ly appreciated is evidenced by the large numbers who take advantage of it. the attendance at the Beauceville school being as high as ninety. There are also three traveling in- structors who bold meetings at var- ious centres and whose efforts to in- troduce new and better methods have met with gratifying success. As They Put It in Brockville. I noticed a most effeetive recruit- ing poster in Brockville wletch read: "How can you cheer for the boys when they come home if you sit on the fence and let them fight your bat- tles for you? Enlist with the 156th Battalion." There is an admirable directness about practically every appeal; in- deed, it must be difficult for the man of military age, who is qualified to enliet, to dodge the imberative note. Take for instance: "Where were you in the hour of crisis.?" or "You are no exception. A successful Ger- many means a Germanized Canada." There is a striking enlistment pos- ter one sees in many windows, where, under a procession of volunteers, the legend reads: "Join the brave throng that goes marching along." A series of canvas signs on the four corners of a Canadian citY bears such catchy phrases as: "This war can't be won at home," "Isn't home worth fighting fax V'—Frank Yeigh in Toronto Star Weekly. Supply of Rennet. In order to ensure that there will be no scarcity of rennet for cheese - making the Dominion Dairy Com- missioner is sending out circular notices recommending all farmers to save the stomachs of the calves which they slaughter during the spring. If the supply of commercial extract should fail these stomachs can then be utilized to advantage. In the cir- cular distributed by the Commission- er fell directions are given for the drying and salting of the rennets, Copies of the circular may be ob- tained by cheesemakers to give to eaeh of their patrons. Quicker Mail Service, H00. T. Chase Ca,sgrain, Canada's Postmaster -General, has now arrang- ed for all Canadian mails, with the exeeptien of newspapers in bulk and parccls, to be carried via New Verk. If (it:deicer, this will offer some re- lief tel bankers and ntercha.nts, who have experienced delay with bulky dennmente Humor arid - • • • 10 +a Ath 4 4 4 4 4 4 F'ttilosophy 2iy TiV)VCAJV M., SMITH FROM THE UNDER DOG., Roil him who isn't In the swim The times are out of Joint To errors in the government flls anger he can point. The wild accounts ot graft and grab, Of plunder, crime and loot, Are food for him, and if they fall Be makes up ones to suit. Upon the skies political No stars of hope appear. Things jog along from bad to worse With each succeeding year, He knows that long it cannot last, To smash the thing must go. Then maybe he will shed a smile And say, "I told you so." You bet it is not much he thinks Of what they do and say In Washington, nor does he guess That congress earns its pay. In fact, if he possessed a dog No brighter than a lot Of senators of whom he knows He'd have the creature shot. When he Is down and M the dump! A bunch of things be sees That are not quite so plain to those Who live a life of ease, But let him only scent euccess. That stranger overdue, And things tat pass before his eyes Don't look one-half so blue. His View. "Are you fond of country life?" "Indeed I am." "But you never go to the country." "Never. 1 always stay in the city." "Why deny yourself so?' "It iin't denial at all. I am fond of country life, for it is a thing that / can sometimes manage to get people whom I don't like to take up." Couldn't Collect. "Brown keeps his house 'very warm." "Yes, so warm that it affects his coal dealer." "Affeets him?" "Oh, I see -good customer." "Didn't mean that:" "What then?" "Makes him hot." A i *I Treating Him Right. "Leave me car tette," pleaded the victim of the bohlup man. "No," replied the robber. "But I want to do the right thing. A distin- guished person like yon should not ride in street cars. Wait here and I will send my auto around to take yon home." His Desire. "I feel the use of a greater educa- tion." Every one does." "Yes, but there's one subject that I wish .to explore to the depths." " What is that?" "I want to learn bow to inherit mon- s. ey." Good Times For Him. • "There goes the original bad man." "What does he do?" "Eats a man for breakfast every morning." "Say, he is right in it in these days of high prices." Has to Collect. The „dancers must pay for the music, But really the fiddler's In luck If after the ball he finds from the hall The men with the money don't duck. Explained. "Suppose 00 r lives were in danger, which -would you save lersndearest,your life or mine?" "W b y, my own." "You brute!" "But don't you see?" "Wbat?" "I would have to save my own before I could possibly sere you. A dead man can't save anybody's life, can he?" - feUT t THOU AVM:Me one WOULD FLOAT S Ai*i 91). 1 )IIP t PERT PARAGRAPHS. Ole man who knows how to treat his wife finds it is up to him to keep busy so far as his knowledge extends. After all, when a man gets a hard jolt circumstantial evidence generally points in the direction of merited treat- ment. When marriage is a failure some times alimony is more satisfactory. Some persons look very foolisb and let it go at that, while others simply are foolish. Being respectable is a business with some persons and a side issue with oth dee. Flattery iS acceptable as long as it ino.squerades as an unprejudiced can- did opinion. Learning to be discreet is what gets us into a lot of trouble. It Is easy enough to talk provided yeti don't feel that a listener is an ate Sohite necessity, Going in for reform is lets Of fun Wben it is the other side that is to be operated upon. iwoor The tiling tt man on a small salary is most partierlar about -in fact, the Only thieg he can afford to be at all particular about -is having his salary talkie& 151 TOLD BY THREE FIGURES. p, sum Iri Arithmetio That Would Take Many Lifetimes to Work Out. What is the highest number that can be expressed with only three #18. ures? Such is the emotion put be the journal of the Aetronomical So, elety o' England. At first glence it would Seem that the number was WO. But it Is uothing of the sorti 900 is far away too sraall. What, then, IS the =ether? Oat -that is to say, the ninth power of tbe ninth Pewee ef 9. Toascertein what this eumber acne. ally is we must refer to a table of 1117eatirimtleTts' odfoortle4e win'cluultlidplitc4taktelonse.YTelorael nunaber contains 369,093,100 figures. To write it out we sbould have to 011 23 volumes of 800 pages each, with 14,000 figures to a page, and the num- ber would be greater than that of 'all Ole atoms in creation. Henri Coupin points out in La Na- ture that there are stars so distant that their light, traveling at 180,320 miles a second, takes a million years to reach the earth. Astronomers have taken this as a unit and called it a "million light year." The number of aton3s in a sphere of platinum that had that radius would be 225, fol- lowed by 88 zeros. Now, a sphere that contained the number of atoms ex- pressed by the ninth power of ilta ninth power of 9 would have to have a radius (in million ligbt years) of 1,239, followed by 123,231,000 zeros. And yet this colossal number can be expressed by three figures. Tame Silk. There is more silk in the world than the silkworm ever knew. As a matter of fact, much of the "silk" which is worn is merely guncotton in a new dress. II is merely cotton dissolved in a bath of nitric acid, kept water free by the strongest vitriol. The jelly- like result is then forced. through very minute tubes, and the fine threads so produced are 'dropped into water and rendered innocuous by tunmoeium sul- phide. This "tame silk" has a fine lus- ter and has all the flexibty of the worms' work. In fact, so 'nose is the resemblance that it needs an expert to distinguish them. -London Chroni- cle. She Liked Gloom. It is a naatter for thankfulness that widows of this generation are more sensible than the dowager Countess of Buchan, who passed away in the year 1786. On the death ef her husband she dressed herself entirely in black crape, engaged two black servants to wait upon her, ate nothing but black pud- dings and drank for one whole yeat nothing but black cherry brandy. Yet she survired this gloomy diet twenty- one years before the grim reaper gath- ered her in. -T. P.'s London Weekly. Shinn Jones' opinion of himself as a golfer was very much greater than his skill warranted, and he had been invited to play, on a certain famous Scottish ground as a visitor. Armed to the teeth with clubs of all sorts and sizes, he set off and, followed by a caddy, proceeded to play. He buried Ms ball in every bunker, gully and bit of rough grass on the landscape anU muttered naughtily. Aft- er half an hour of it he turned to his silent caddy. "Really," he murmured ingratiating- ly, "this is the most difficult course I hare ever played ore" "Hoo aid ye ken?" replied the lad, in scorn. "Ye boom played on it yet!" Rodin and His Models. It is one of the peculiarities of M. Rodin, the famous sculptor, that he never poses a model. When a model enter.; his studio be engages her in conversatiou upon a subject foreign to art and thus encourages tier to forget berself. Meanwhile hi.; attention ap- pears to be engrossed elsewhere. but he is wetehing her keenly. When the inodei oneonseiously asemates a pose or au expreselon which he believes would be eiffeethie lie bids her hold that potation wide he sets to work, 3y this; 1i -collet lie believes (au avuids ;tilted and tat:ilea pesee. WHV not give your lad 1 the same training? "When I was a growing lad, and came upon many words in my reading that 1.010 not understand, ray mother. in- - stead of giving me the definition when I applied to her, uniformly sent me to the dictionary to learn it, and in this " way I gradually learned many things besides the meaning of the individual word in question—among other things. how to use a dictionary, and the great ••• pleasure and advantage there might be in the use of the dictionary. Afterwards. when I went to the village school. my chief diversion, after les- sons were learned and before they were recited, was in turning over the pages of the 'Unabridged' of pose days. Now the most modern Una- ..) bridged-theNEW INTEENITIONAL- gives me a pleasure of the same sort, So far as ray knowledge extends. it Is at present the best of the otte-volunte dictionaries, and quite sufficient for all ordinary uses. Even those who possess the eplendid dictionaries in - several volumes will yet find it a great convenience to have this, which ie so compact, so full, and tat trustworthy !"-• as to leave, in most cases, little to be desired." -Albert S. , Professor of the English Language and Literature, Yale Univ. Aptil 2801911. werte fer %woman tage, illostrations, Eta. WE33StER'ES NEW 3:33TEIINATIONA74raortotthair G. RC C. MERRIAM COIVIPINV, Por Over es Yeats Publishers of The Genuine Webster's Dictionaries, SPItINGFIntan MASS, neseenee........asesee