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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Goderich Signal-Star, 1980-04-30, Page 21dcve sykes Dear Federal Government: I am rather distraught. Apparently you didn't appreciate or weren't, quite satisfied with my annual contribution to the country's growing deficit. I can understand that you fellas might be under pressure to produce some quick bucks, but please, not at my expense. Now I don't want to be labelled as a whiner but I must make an objection about having to pay more income tax. I know that most years I've hit you guys for a healthy return and truthfully, you've been quite obliging about it all. But this year, you see, 'believe that a substanital contribution h`as already been made and I feel your request for additional funds is a rather bold one. , So, get off my case bucko. You turkeys took. enough of my money and then have the unlimited gall and audacity to ask for more. Niee•try maniacal mandarine. Now let'me just tell you a sad tale so you'll have an idea of what tough sleddin' is like. Take my car for instance. I call it a ear but the boys at the garage get a healthy chuckle out of i.t. Well, I scanned that income tax form front to balk but could not find anything that said, refer to Guide Items such and such. That car is Worse. than a dependent. Insurance, tires, radiators, gas, oil and a therrnabonger for the discon- b:oamerator, But you won't let me claim that will youbozo bureaucrat? And that .section for dependants didn't say a word about mother -in- laws.' Does the Prime Minister's mother-in- law, ever drop in for three week visits and redecorate the guest room, add a wing on to the north section of 24 Sussex and lavish the chi-ldren with expensive gifts and all at his expense. I would think not. Perhaps it would be wise for the treasury department to give some consideration to the poor fellow whose relatives,. on the wife's side of course, make a habit •of visiting each weekend and are capable of inhaling exhaustive amounts of food and drink. Again, your easy to follow guide made no mention of sponging relatives. I would suspect that if Juan Chretien or Alex McEa•chen entertained obese relatives on a consistent basis, their income tax forms would reflect such costs. The t-reas.ury department also had the nerve to question deductions listed under political contributions and contributions made to elevate the socio-economic status of tavern owners. Really. However; on several occasions, while enjoying comforting beverages with newsrooms colleagues, the tone of conversation often turned to politics. In view of the fact that I offered profound, responsible and articulate insight into the Liberal foreign policy and other key political matters to ill informed cohorts, well, I naturally a"ssumed the beverages would be deductible. But, apparently, that is not the case,,, I would have to suggest that It is rathe,>4, small of the govertinnent to contest such a point. The treasury boys also challenged my contribution to elevate the some - economic status of tavern owners. I was just practising a healthy foreign - aid program in my own small way. The tavern owner is a foreigner, afterall, and was most appreciative of iny. patronage. Such provisions, I maintain, should appear on future income tax forms. I was rather perturbed that my religious .contribution of $700 was - turned aside. Now, I realize, the money was used to purchase a colour television set, but there have been times when the family watched the odd religious program. A fringe item, to be sure, but the connection is there. So, in future, I suggest you leave it up to the discretion of the individual taxpayer to decide what amount of income tax is owing the government. Trust us. 61 Gt.wcierich _ -- SIGNAL STAR 132 YEAR -18 WEDNESDAY, APRIL 30, 1980 SECOND SECTION It's preventative medic BY CATH WOODEN How would you react if you walked into the kitchen and discovered a member _of , your family lying unconscious and not breathing on the floor? Would you call an ambulance? While you wait out the . five to 12 minutes for it to arrive, you could either watch your loved one die or you could save his or her life if you only knew what to do. Well, the St. John Ambulance does its best to see to it that you do know what to do. In 1977, 141,000 people in Ontario were taken to the hospital as a result of household accidents. Of those, 895 died, according to the Ontario • Ministry of Health. 'The ministry also says that as a result of the St. John Ambulance efforts, these numbers can be reduced by 40 per cent. In 1979, 98,000 people were trained in one or more of the several St. Jghn courses available. J Many of these courses are available in Goderich. Chief Training Officer for the Goderich St. John ' Ambulance is Gary Renaud. He and five qualified instructors teach eight to 12 Standard First Aid courses a year. The course is 16 hours long. Renaud says that there is a wide variety of people who take the course. They rangefrom com- pany employees who are ordered to take •the course by the Workman's Compensation Board; to policemen, students planr?ing medical careers, and housewives. There are more courses available : also. There is an Emergency First Aid course that is eight hours long, a short Save A Life course, and this fall, Renaud plans to start a Choking course, ,• Driver Training in first aid, and instruction for babysitters. Renaud and the in- structors and .examiners all give their time free. Renaud says he volun- teers so much of his time to the St. John Chief training officer Gary Renaud inspects the first aid work done by students William Grant and Lance Saddler during the most recent of the several I am regressing. The realization finally dawned upon me as I was skipping home from the store with Kool-Aid and Arrowroots. I had meant to get coffee and Rolaids. "Cath, old girl," I told innyself. "It's time you realized you are regressing." "Right," I answered. "Soon as Mr. Dressup is over." Oh, I suppose the clues have been piling up for quite some time now. Like the fact that all my best friends are under four feet tall. I kidded myself for a while, insisting that my affiliation with so many tiny people was just coincidence and that we had a lot in common, like a passion for tree - climbing and playing pirates. But now .I know they have just beep using me. Using me to reach the cookie jar and untangle their kite strings. Using me for an easy ride to get ice cream. I feel so cheap. I'm almost afraid to go to my friend St. John Ambulance courses held in Goderich every year. (photo by Cath Wooden) Davey's fifth birthday party this week. I just know that if I get a yellow balloon instead of a red one, I'II throw a tan- trum and kick somebody in the shin. • My older acquaintances often tease me about the, way my regression in- terferes with my social life. I jump on furniture. A talk loudly in, restaurants and I search through &her people's drawers. I'm told that when I watch television, I have a tendency to rock back and forth and bang my head against the back of the couch. But that isn't all. It's not just with other people who are already children that I have been regressing. It happens at home when I am alone. I think about all the great times I had in Kindergarten. Remembering my short initiation, I laugh at how I thought recess was something one took to school. And I was curious as to what"' it would be like to get sent to the corner, so I ran over nay best friend's finger Ambulance because he "enjoys teaching, and maybe I can help prevent some of what I see everyday." He is an ambulance driver at Alexandra Marine and General Hospital. Even though the St. John Ambulance does not have to pay salaries, it still has many expenses that depend on public support. The government does not,, subsidize . St. John at all,. Renaud says that the Goderich branch operates on about $3,000 a y -ear, which is raised through course fees and public donations. The branch has to buy equipment such as mannequins, bandages, projecters and • in- structional films for the courses. This year, the St. 3'otr r-Arrtbutarrce--Bri-gade in .Goderich will need a mobile unit. Renaud ......... expects that' "they 'wi71 require $15,000 this year and, must make an active public appeal for donations. The Brigade places • a team on duty at many sporting events in and around Goderich, such as Young Canada Week, the Cancer bike-a-thon, horse races etc., in case of emergencies. Brigade members are volunteers. Goderich has 12 active Brigade members and another half a dozen that can be called upon. Renaud says the mem- bers are always changing because many of them are students. .The members undergo constant training and are certified every year by St. John Ambulance, awhile people that take the ' regular courses are qualified for three years. Renaud is quick to No, our intrepid police Chief Pat King was not found point out that while asleep on the floor of a G.D.C.I. classroom by graduates of St. John William Grant. The two were practicing St. John ne Ambulance courses possess the • basic life- saving skills, they are not like Hollywood paramedics. "We em- phasize the common sense skills like tem- perature and breathing treatment, bleeding control, and the prevention of shock." The effects. • of shock (the lowering of body tem- perature) are often more , serious than the accident injuries themselves. But he says they don't pass anyone that doesn't deserve to be passed either. The students learn the.skills by doing them and they must perform them as well as pass a Turn to page 2A Richard Fremlin applies a dressing to an imaginary wound on Paul Gosse. St. John Ambulance students learn first aid techniques by doing them over and over again. After passing the course they are qualifiied for three years. (photo by Cath Wooden) A with the tricycle. Ah, those were the days. And you know what? I've never had the courage to reveal this to anyone before, liut,...I keep Lego in my closet. That's right, I do. It is n deluxe set with hundreds of pieces. Sometimes at night when I'm all alone 1 take it out and play with if, maybe for hours., One time it got really had I'd been playing Lego for a long while I lost all track of time, who I was. and where I was. But I didn't care. All 1 «,rnted to do was play Lego! Then it happened. I was discovered in the midst of my marathon ,Lego game. An adult friend burst through the door and surveyed my plight. There were Lego pieces all over the floor. "Look at you," he snarled. ' We were supposed to go to a party and here you --,are, still in your overalls. playing Lego. You area child." I was devistated. Denying his ac- cusation, I went 'on a Lego binge. Finally, as 1 said, coming home from the store with the Kool-Aid and Arrowroots I knew I had to stop. The first thing I did was to take a hath. It was awful, especially the washing behind the ears part, Then I cleaned up my apartment. While I vacuumed up all the cookie crumbs and ,spilled Kool-Aid mix, some vagrant Lego pieces got caught in the brushes and disappeared. Ambulance techniques on their final night of In- struction last week. (photo by Cath Wooden) cath wooden 1 went momentarily wild. 1 ripped /s open the vacuum cleaner hag and retrieved the pieces. Carefully packing them away in my Lego briefcase, I stored the whole thing way hack in my closet so that if I feel I truly need to play, those shiny red, blue, yellow, white, and black plastic' pieces with those superb special effects. like the crane, fork lift, ladder, tree, and an- tenna will be there writing. a