HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Goderich Signal-Star, 1985-04-03, Page 4'PA' .Pit -410PPAI SI NA ,TAft, WE P1 SDAY, APRIL 3,1985
•
AVE
YKES
•
Initially, this paltry piece was intended to
be inundated with much mirth and merri-
ment in lightof the fact that Monday was
April Fool's Day.
My original intention was to dispense with
an elaborate hoax that would have people
believing that Goderich seceded from
Canada or that the town had abandoned
plans to secure a Junior hockey franchise
and go after anNHL•team instead,
But then Harold Ballard would bicker
about territorial rights or something silly
anyway. So what's the use.
Rather than have my way with the
readers, I was content to play practical
fokes on my children. They're so easy. They
all for all my lines, laugh and giggle a lot
and generally consider the old boy to be a
great time,
You think kids don't know where their
money comes from.
But that does. not preclude the fact that I
am given to practical jokes and other
related pranks. I have given serious, albeit
fleeting, consideration to regaling readers
with an entire newspaper of fabricated,
embellished and otherwise explicitly vague
generalties.
One day my 'secret desire mak become a
reality, but until then, you will havetofeast
sumptuously on the offerings presented.
One of my personal favorites April Fools
pranks involved an. aunt who,unsuspectingly
became a participant in a radio joke. Let me
set the scene.
While performing household chores, my
aunt is listening to a local radio station when
her attention is -focused on a special public
service announcement. The radio disk
jockey explains that the local cable, televi-
sion company has been having problems
transmitting its signal through the lines.
In a straight voice, he goes on to explain
that the company, in the interest of offering
a better signal to subscribers, will, be
flushing out the cable television lines (luring
the afternoon.
Subscribers were asked to disconnect the
cable from the back of the television and
place it, in an empty pail. If there was any
residue in the line, the radio personality
reasoned, it would be flushed out into the
pail.
My aunt dutifully removed the cable from
the set and placed it in a pail in the middle of
the living room floor. The cable remained
there until my uncle returned from work in
the evening. r. „
It's been years since the prank;,transpired'
but my aunt still gets kidded about the inci-
dent and I continue to get a good laugh just
thinking about it.
One of the favorite pranks at your favorite
weekly is to send a new employee -9n a itliFr
sion "downstairs."
It's an infamous ploy that has Worked on
several unsuspecting employees who when
looking for someone or sometYriing during
the first days of their employ are told to
check downstairs. Of course, there 'is no
basement here but we suspect that some
employees are still looking for it.
Some may have found it, we're not really
sure.
The most recent prank that would ac leve
lofty heights on an April Fools ra g
system involved a brand new newsroom col-
league who was advised that it's a sure sign
of spring when the seals come into harbour.
We almost pulled it off. And come to think
of it, it's a damned good assignment that
will 'surely be circulated to all new
employees.
For this year, I let April Fools Day slide
by unobtrusively. But excuse me now, I
think my cable line is flushing.
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. SINE 1848
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!
There will be sacTif ices
Information meetings with respect to the pur suance' of Separate high schools in
Huron -Perth counties has raised some interesting questions on the part of parents.
General information meetings dealing with the provincial government's commitment
to fund separate schools beyond Grade 10 beginning in September 1985 have been held in
several locations -in the two:Counties the past week.
Subsequent to- the meetings, the Huron -Perth Separate School Board will be asking
parents of elementary school students to fill out a comprehensive questionnaire. The
survey will be availablethis week.
According to the planning group, which evolved'out of an ad hoc committee, the
separate school board has tentative plans to begin offering Grade 9 in Central Huron
Secondary School in September 1986. Subsequent grades will be offered each year.
Under the provisions of the funding scheme, the board must locate within its own
system or use vacant facilitiesin the public system. With space available in Clinton, it
provides the most attractive alternative to the board initially.
Ostensibly, as was adequately indicated at the meeting here Thursday, those students
now in Grade 7 in the separate system will be the pioneers of the separate high school
system. These students will be asked to be bused to Clinton for Grade 9 and operate as a
-school within a sehooi-." The €olilowing year they wilLbe joined by other Grade 9s until.
the separate high, school outgrows the shared facility and is able to either relocate or
fund a new facility.
As in any new venture, there will be considerable sacrifice required on the part of
parents and students and as was pointed out at thepublic meeting, growing pains will be'
much in evidence as the new school is launched.
There may be a price for parents and students to pay in launching two new high schools
in the neighbouring counties.
Parents expressed concerns about religious education, the quality of education, the
loss of extra -curricular activities, the pressures related to relocating and operating
within another school and the viability of another small high school in the county.
There is no doubt that sacrifice will be an integral component of the establishment of
separate high schools.
Students may. not have access to the competitive sporting programs now available in
the public system. Other academic or dramatic pursuits may also be years off for the
students of the separate high schools.
It was pointed out that the idea behind the establishment of the high school was not to
he competitive on the football field with its public shool counterpart, but rather to nur-
4uwe and maintain what Father_Carrigan of St. Patricks Church Dublin called the Three
Rs of the separate system -the teaching of respect, responsibility and religion.
It is all part of what panel members referred to as the Catholic philosophy.
Ultimately, parents and their sons and daughters will have to decide if they wish to
pursue their high sthooT education in separate schools. -Sacrifices-.will have to -be- made
along the way and parents and their children will have to decide the price they are will-
ing to pay for that education.
After spending a few days in Toronto last
week I returned by public transportation on
E'riday. It registered vaguely in the
oacitground of my mind that there were
many uniformed attendants in the subway
areas, but I did not give it a further thought.
In Union Station I intended to leave my
rather heavy suitcase in a locker, as I fre-
quently do, in order to cross the street com-
fortably to .the Royal York Hotel and have a
coffee before boarding the train to Strat-
ford. but much to my astonishment there
was not one locker open among the hun-
dreds on both levels. Several other people
walked around with a similarly perplexed
and annoyed look, finding themselves unex-
pectedly stuck with their luggage in the
same fashion. .
The reason for alT this became apparent
later in the evening when The National (and
I presume, other networks) finally informed
the public of the background drama that had
been going on in Toronto since Tuesday
when the police had received an Armenian
terrorist threat. Friday morning hac. been
the deadline for the demanded • release of the
three Armenians held in connection with the
recent Turkish embassy occupation in Ot-
tawa in which a security guard had been'
killed. The precautionary measu>aes taken in
Toronto were extensive and included great-
ly increased security forces and sealing all
the lockers after inspection during the week.
The threatened terrorist attack was to
take place on Monday morning. I am
writing this on Monday afternoon, after tur-
ning to the news broadcast every hour,
relieved now that so far nothing terrible has
happened and ardently hoping that it never
will.
One always feels that international ter-
rorism is -distant; it comes as a severe blow
to find it on the doorstep. I take the Toronto
threat very personally. The city was my
home for many years, my first home in
Canada before I moved to Goderich. Its
theatres, galleries, concert halls and other
interesting big city facilities continue to at-
tract me as a visitor and friend. I am very
fond of Toronto and it saddens my greatly
that one of the results of being- a
cosmopolitan centre is becoming a target
for terrorism.
At the same time I feel grief for Canada,
the fragile giant of a territory inhabited not
really by a nation, but a large collection of
groups, many of them carrying the. burdens
of their often grim past in distant con-
tinents, unable or unwilling -to use Canada's
considerable freedoms for a warmly
positive forward look instead of;turning to
shadowy backward glances.
Instead of aiming for a more meaningful
substance of common loyalty to the good
things we share in peace, we seem to be
possessed by a newly emphasized craze of
fierce adherence to the differences which
keep us divided and often glaring in i our lit-
tle boxes. How could there be Canadian
A Teal blast
by Todd Mowatt
POSTSCRIPT
SUSAN HUNDERTMARK
The nightly newscasts detailing the hor-
rors of starvation in Africa have dwindled
down into weekly reports. Shocked by the in-
itial footage of our fellow human beings,
their bodies near,skeletons, dying from.star-
vation on international television, our first
response was to give generously. But, after
the first push for international aid, we're in
danger of congratulating ourselves for our
generosity too soon. We're tempted' to pat
ourselves on the backs for responding to the
pleas for help when the problem is far from
solved.
At this stage, the crisis in Ethiopia and
other starving third world, countries is at
risk of becoming another trend. We did our
bit by contributing when asked and we
bought the Tears Are Not Enough record
when it came out but now we've reached the
point of saturation. We've seen our fill of
starving kids and are waiting for the next
worthy cause the media will bring to our at-
tention.
I may sound cynical but I believe we've
been trained to respond to such issues that
way. After we're alerted to, a situation,
we're bombarded with information -abaft it
by the media and we all jump on the band
wagon until we've had enough. We care but
_our . attention spans are short. Without
famine and widespread suffering in our
backyards, we quickly lose our sense of
urgency about it.
Malnutrition and starvation is nothing
new. "We knew what was going on years
before it got international TV publicity,"
former federal agriculture minister Eugene
Whelan recently told college students in
London. And, unless we make a greater
commitment to helping starving peoples,.
many more millions will die. Instead, we
spend more than ever on sophisticated
weapons, he said.
Canada, byincreasing aid to famine relief
from $3 million to $26 million, has become
the largest donor to Ethiopia. But, it can still
do more by sharing its expertise in
agriculture. Miraculous results could come
about if the Canadian -developed dry -land
farming was transferred to Africa, said Mr.
Whelan.
It seems that younger Canadians, high
school and college age, are the people Mr.
Whelan and other agencies are trying to
reach the most. Organizations like Cansave
give presentations about Ethiopia in schools
with the belief that tomorrow's answers will
come_from.young peo-pig.__•
Recordings like Britain's Do They Know
It's Christmas?, U.S.A.'s We Are The World
and Canada's Tears Are Not Enough are
aimedat collecting donations from our af-
fluent youth.
While young people have more disposable
income that ever before, I question whether
they are in a position to make the changes
necessary to really solve the problem of
world hunger.
Has anyone heard how much. the people
with money such as corporations and big
businesses have contributed? Have seed
companies and agricultural machinery
companies shared their expertise? I haven't
heard.
Youth are the future leaders of our coun-
try and aiming pleas for aid their way is a
good idea. A generation committed to giving
to their fellow human beings is only good
news for mankind. But, youth also learn
from example and those presently in power
need to do their part as well.
In order to keep our interest in helping
needy nations, I think we have to continue to
feel there is some hope. We have to know
that our contributions are getting to the peo-
ple who need them (and according to Mr.
Whelan, 95 per cent of the contributions do
go where they're supposed to.
We have to forget about band-aid solutions
and send away our aid as regularly as we fill
out our -income tax forms. And, we have to
keep our politicians sending away parfions "" -
of our taxes to under -developed nations.
Long after the radio stations stop playing
We Are_ The World and Tears Are Not
Enough, we have to continue to give aid
where it's needed.
culture, Canadian identity, Canadian
patriotism, if there are no Canadians, only
different groups who are seeking shelter for
their own purposes?
When are the members of the so-called
ethnic groups going to be mature and confi-
dent enough to throw away the hyphens of
their separateness and become free and
tolerant individuals- who are eager to par-
ticipate cheerfully in a free and tolerant na-
tion?
The Armenian group is not the only one to
whom this applies, but it is clearly visible
for its more militant and grim determina-
tion not to let go the past, but to drag into
our everyday lives, often with tragic results,
events that happened long ago iri distant
lands. It almost looks as if some groups are
taking a perverse and masochistic pride in
displaying history's gory skeletons in to-
day's living rooms, trying to perpetuate suf-
fering through new forms of violence and
revenge.
There is equally determined and even
growing division in many other areas of our
daily lives, partly promoted by the different
labels on our schools into vrhich we carry the
prejudices we are anxious to pass on to' our
childpen C, n we not bversrub out the labels
and break out of our little boxes, in order to
celebrate and cherish all the marvellous
things we as people have in common? Then
there would be no ground for terrorism and
violence. If this sounds sentimental, tell me
of a better way.
ELSA HAYDON