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HomeMy WebLinkAboutClinton News-Record, 1985-12-18, Page 38Sexual dry Spells Continued from page 4 CURES FOR THE DRY SPELL helps here., So does talking it ow Looking to wash that dry spell with a friend, lover or ` out of your life'? The experts professional. suggest Then there's anxiety. Like boredom, it can rear its head on either side of the bedroom door. When it's inside anxiety (also dubbed performance anxiety), for a man, it's agonizing about getting (or maintaining or faking) an erection. For a woman, it's agonizing about avoiding pregnancy, becoming . aroused or reaching an orgasm. If each orgasm is becoming an ordeal lately, it's important to realize that a lot of cares might anish if you could somehow be re relaxed and laid-back and ss reluctant in bed. Also try to exchange your "musts" fair "it would be nice ifs." Keep your wishes as preferences instead of iron -clad ,l requirements. Other anxieties can also erode your passion. A certain amount of agitation begins because women rarely go to bed simply out of lust. They go to bed for love. Women can sometimes be worried when they do have good sex because they're afraid of getting emotionally involved. Rather than risk falling for Mr. Wrong, some women prefer to dose up or fail sexually. . Even those anxieties that occur completely outside the bedroom can create interference. Career demands and work overload figure heavily. Taking a vacation from sex to re-route your energy is a popular motivation and a positive one. A period of self-induced chastity can give you a welcome respite from the worries, pressures and commitment of a more involved • relationship (particularly important after a break-up). The 'dry spell also allows you Oassess yourself and work on lf-improvement and new projects without worrying about pleasing someone else. Many women find six months of chastity rewarding because it helps them concentrate on writing that novel, changing that career or simply thinking things over, An unpremeditated dry -spell, which seems to move in from nowhere, is useful as a barometer. In fact. when. it happens to a once lusty lady, this lack of passion may be Mother Nature's way of sending a telegram: "incipient illness ahead. Proceed with caution." But while this sudden disinterest may sometimes indicate that a bodily 'ailment is brewing, by itself, a steady diet of chastity won't cause poor • health, rot your teeth or shorten your life expectancy. However, if you have currently been chaste for several months, don't chew your fingernails over it. Being aware of the condition gives you a certain control. Besides, each person has his or her own • timetable for everything. Sex, when you finally do engage in it, may very well be better than a er your.celibate stage is ded. 1. Confide in a friend and/or consult a therapist, especially if your sexual aridity has lasted over a year. 2. Spend time with attractive, stimulating potential partners. 3. Immerse yourself in erotica 4. Write down your most riveting fantasy. 5. Masturbate. 6. Douse yourself with cologne and wear silky fabrics next to your skin. Aim to arouse all your senses. 7. Try new things when you're making love or being obliging. Why not whisper something wicked? 8. Leave your TV locked away. Focus on his body, his eyes instead. 9. Scribble a naughty note describing, in delicious detail, how he should turn you on, even if you don't mail it. 10. Schedule a sexy session with him — and keep the appointment. 11. Take a romantic vacation a deux or take separate vacations. (The reunion itself might be worth it.) 12. Realize that dry spells don't end spontaneously. Seduce a new (or current) lover. After a period of chastity, lovemaking is usually better than ever. ■ Regional Value Spotter, December 18, 1985 Page 5 OUR CHRISTMAS CATALOGUE Now Available Pofronize Spotter Advertisers The biggest little santas in the world know that you want to get what you pay for, as people who care about quality and service. Its all right here. Come see it now, at Santa's favorite store. doucj powePs LTD. 434 Clarence St. Downtown London 438-2411 de fine apparel for ladies and men