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HomeMy WebLinkAboutClinton News-Record, 1985-11-27, Page 36ft' Fuge tO e I al).64:10 S.Atlor,Npvimi;tiar, 27, 1,945 , .. • . fl • • • „- • - • , by Robert Ilrod1, hroughout history, finger -wagging scolds have warned us that gossiping is taboo, nothing more than malicious recreation for the petty, the jealous and the vindictive. Long linked with slander and scandal, gossip carries a bad name. It's true that gossip is very much like confetti — easy to throw around if you want to leave a mess. At it's vicious worst,. gossip can bruise emotions, shatter reputations, ruin careers, dnve away friends, family and lovers. What people say about you behind your back signifies, for better or worse, your standing in the community. "Gossip is universal," says Jack Levine, sociology professor who specializes in the study of gossip. "Gossip has not changed in the history of the human race." Nothing but tape over the lips will stop people from murmuring about a sizzling affair, a marriage on the rocks or newly disclosed unspeakable acts. Why do we gossip? What compels us all to inform on each other? It's addicting because it's easy .for• anyone with a myth and: ears w de. Ws safer than skiing and it's as satisfying as a gourmet feast, We also gossip to convey information, to feed our intense curiosity about how others live and to act out a kind of intoxicating voyeurism. According to one wag, "Gossip is vice enjoyed vicariously." In the quest for status, prestige and power, gossip can be handed around much like money. Gossip lets you play puppeteer and pull a few strings. "More than anything," says Joe, a publishing executive, "the person you're telling the juicy rumor to thinks you're au courant." "People gossip to get attention," says Frederick Koenig, a social psychology professor with scholarly expertise in gossip. "If you want to make an impression, gossip gives you a place in the sun for a short time," On the whole, people gossip to get ahead, both socially and professionally. That's why it's often the least popular people who circulate rumors, especially the odious kind — they're trying to gain importance. "It's very rare for people at • the top to engage in petty gossip," says lt.oemg.."11's also interesting that we get more mileae out of bad news than' good." Another reason we gossip is to relieve deep-seated emotional problems. For many people, spilling a few tasty morsels about, say, the randy goingsfon in another household can actuatly ease anxiety, release tensioj3, overcome hostility, combat boredom. A good gossip session can fUricficin as therapy. letting you express W4111101 otherwise go unsaid. Gossip also enables us to examine our behavior and, hi so doing, to establish morality. By making public our opinions about others: we're circulating ideas about what's right and what's wrong' Gossip confirms or challenges our most basic beliefs and, ultimately, influences our feelings about everything from love and sex to work and manners. By now it's clear that gossip, contrary to its reputation, involves much more than sniping and backbiting. Gossip can be a valuable positive tool if 'handled correctly, offering you the chance to: Make new friends. In a recent experiment at the University of California at San Diego, psychologists found out that sbanng secrets made teller and listener feel more favorably toward each other. Swapping confidences can form a bond that leads to trust and intimacy. • Do a better jab. if you're ' attuned to office scuttlebutt, you can learn, indirectly, what kind of work your boss expects from you. By listening to casual conversation, you can determine unwritten policies about conduct Please turn to page 13 • ere You've Never Been Beforev . 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