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HomeMy WebLinkAboutClinton News-Record, 1984-10-24, Page 24• W C.Q. • wilimmisisommimomminwirosiommisammoi Parenting education may help reduce chill abuse, psychologist believes child abuse is not a simple problem by any means but a University of Western On- tario psychologist is having encouraging success with a new approach to prevention. Dr. David Wolfe, an Assistant Professor in the Department of Psychology, is trying out some ideas to strengthen the "competence" of parents and make them less prone to abusing their children. Early intervention, teaching child rearing skills, and nurturing the development of young children are the key concepts Wolfe has in- tegrated for testing in a research project called "Promoting Competence in Parents at Risk o£Abuse". Wolfe said, "The project is aimed at preventing abuse as opposed to stopping it after it has started. It's a strengthening pro- gram focusing on parent and child needs rather than on already established child abuse pathology." "Competence is a person's ability to in- teract with his or her environment and we're trying to develop adaptive behaviour on both sides, in parent and child." "We teach problem -solving and positive child rearing methods to strengthen the parent's competence to manage the child. We also strengthen the child's adaptive skills and teach parents to do the same." By : `adaptive skills", Wolfe means the child's primary development of language and social behaviour. "Parents at risk can get easily upset when their kid doesn't listen and speak clearly. So we work to help the child develop adaptive skills and teach the parent reasonable ex- pectations." In this vein, a developmental training component for the child, based on evidence that children "at risk" lag behind in physical and psychological development, is central to Wolfe's project. Child rearing isn't a completely natural event, Wolfe said. "Humans are the least prepared species for it. Parenting is downplayed by our culture; having child rearing skills • is not as important as getting your driver's license." Child abuse research has shown that abusive parents often lack the skills and ex- periences necessary for effective child rear- ing. "It occurs perhaps because abuse was a part of their own childhood, because of cur- rent stress in their life, because of the child's unruly behaviour. In effect, the child b omes the `releaser stimulus' for much of tlj;,par nt's anger and frustration," Wolfe said. The vast majority of child abuse cases result from "over -discipline" or excessive efforts to gain control, he added. It's only 10 ta15 per cent of child abuse cases where the parent is actually seriously disturbed." "I'd say 60 to 85 per cent of parents at risk can be helped to overcome susceptibility to child abuse." Wolfe and a team of trained graduate students are teaching ."clear, structured skills" to the parents participating in their research project. Almost all are single mothers between 18 and 25 years of age. The childrenare between 12 monthsand four years old. • • Wolfe emphasizes that his research study is not a comprehensive community preven- tion program because it doesn't provide the basic income, housing and advice on nutri- tion that parents at risk often require. "We had to define child abuse operational- ly because we • can't change their socioeconomic status. "In looking at how they interact with their children 'we foilrtd characteristics that distinguish parents at risk. And so what we can do is make them more effective parents. through better interactions with their kids. Meaning smiles, hugs, and taking a strong interest in the child's play and develop- ment." Family and Children's Services of London and Middlesex have referred parents to the UWO psychology project. The agency in- vestigates alleged cases of child abuse or high risk circumstances (egs. very young mothers or poor living conditions). Many of these parent/child pairs are then accepted into Wolfe's program. Some refer- .rals are turned down because a;project staff assessment shows their parenting needs to lie elsewhere. LEAF PICK UP The Town of Clinton will pick up leaves MONDAY, OCTOBER 22 MONDAY, OCTOBER 29 Weather Permitting Leaves must be securely contained in bags or other suitable containers, Would all citizens please keep leaves separate from regular garbage at the curbside. C.C. Proctor Clerk -Treasurer Some of the families accepted are assign- ed to a control group that receivesthe ongo- ing services of the agency which include weekly support group meetings, nutritional information, and protective service visits in the home. All subjects in the control group will be offered treatment following the three month control period. Parents accepted into the program are visited in their homes by project staff who observe and record frequencies of selected parent and child behaviours: smiles, hugs, verbal reinforcement, criticism, com- mands, child compliance and child deviant behaviour. Also, the child is assessed by the agency nurse for his or her developmental level as part of a routine medical examina- tion. The parent and child attend treatment sessions at the University. The mother/child pairs average about nine treatment sessions with the therapist. While the mothgr watches from an adjoin- ing room, a therapist models effective behaviours with the child which make for better interactions: attending to the child's activity and giving praise, hugs, smiles and clear commands when appropriate. The mother is shown how to deal with undesirable behaviour through appropriate forms of nonphysical punishment. Then the parent mimics and practises what she's seen, while the therapist pro- vides guidance from the adjoining room us- ing a radio transmitter — earpiece hookup. Wolfe said the therapist tries to establish a close relationship with the child and to show that the child can be enjoyed even if he's being troublesome. The modelling technique works, Wolfe said, because most of the mothers come in with a "show me what to do" attitude. "They've admitted they need help with their child rearing," he added. "Some of the most effective modelling oc- curs when the mother sees us having a hard time with her kid." Parents are taught to stimulate the child's development through teaching exercises and developmental tasks. For instance, the therapist demonstrates methods to develop the child's expressive speech and pronun- ciation of consonant sounds. The child is prompted to imitate the sound and reward- ed for successful attempts. Parents are assigned two to four such tasks each session and are encouraged to practise the training stimulation each day at home. Similar ac- tivities are chosen to improve the child's receptive speech (listening and following simple directions), .social interaction (eye contact, smiling, touching, or playing with others), and sensory motor skills (grasping, throwing, walking) appropriate to his or her age and developmental level. Parents and children in the treatment pro- gram will be re -assessed two months follow- ing the last contact with a therapist and the results compared to the control group for retention of parenting skills. In addition, treatment families will be evaluated at six month intervals thereafter to follow the pro- gress of parenting skills and the child's adaptive abilities over time. • Wolfe said he expects the final data to show that the control • children don't develop as quickly as treatment children and. that treatment mothers become more competent at rearing their children and less at risk. "We expect a noticeable decrease in child problem complaints," he said. "The study should show that the kids who get the adaptive skills training will progress further in the critical developmental area. That improvement is a .preventative factor in abuse as well as in developmental delay. And parents in the training condition should show important changes in parenting skills relative to the control group." • NOTICE It is an offence to burn leaves or other debris on the PAVED PART of any street within the Town of Clinton. The resultant heat does much damage to the asphalt. Offenders will be prosecuted. C.C. PROCTOR Clerk -Treasurer ,.aboot the children? *Meet, is the main word to remembor• when c Uh g, she stressed. Itis•ap to Fantiijy Services wortCers to confirm the suspicion. Many breople hesitate to get involved in such situations, but laws state that names of informants cannot be revealled. "Should you call?" Sheila asked. "If you're that suspicious weigh that up before injury can occur." Family Services, she noted, "is not to be feared. We're not out to punish people." Sheila says that her agency uses their authority to go into private homes, "with the utmost sensitivity and respect. We don't enter a home in an accusatory manner. We're not looking to who's guilty." Some parents realize their family is in a crisis and they ask that the children be removed. Others won't accept the situation and don't want their children taken away. "In our everyday work we're dunned if we do and damned if we don't," Sheila said. The ultimate goal is to help the parents, restore family life and reintegrate children back into their homes. One in 10 times the situation arises where it would be dangeroys to.return the child. 'the slow Diller ' Sheila said that physical abuse in the home can be readily seen, "You respond to it. The courts respond to it." However, as Dr. Jaffe found, emotional abuse is much harder to detect. Sheila calls it, "the slow killer. It's just as damaging. The impact on the child is damaging over a long period of time." Ceutrary to tip stereotypes, violence does not only occur in low income classes, com- mon law marriages, alcoholic families. "It has no boundaries. It covers every class," Sheila said. "If we look at wife abuse, we can't leave out the emotional aspects on the kids," she stressed, Since the workshop with Dr. Jaffe. representatives from various agencies in Huron County have met in Clinton to further discuss the problem of family violence. Col- lectively they hope to increase community awareness, offer further assistance, counselling and education programs . Single parents find support group..... • from page 1 Kids need love I'm an advocate of the kids and kids need as many people as they can have in their lives who are willing and able to love them. It's horrible for kids to lose a parent; it's devastating," she says. Typical reactions from children after a divorce include fearing rejection from both parents, assuming responsibility for the needs of their parents, playing their parents off each other, withdrawing or feeling trap- ped in the middle. "The best chance to have children accept the separation Ls to have children not lose anything. I think the best situation is joint custody where they spend a lot of time with both parents," she says. Although it's fine for parents to show their emotions in front of their children, Ms. McLeod says it's best to talk about feelings of anger and hurt to other adults at the self- help group. Showing too much emotion to her children was a particular concern of Karen. "I had a hard time hiding pain from my kids. One time I was sitting at the kitchen table with dinner and I simply started to cry and T couldn't stop. Professionals have told me' it's okay, but I think they've seen enough pain," she says. Dating new people can also cause pro- blems for children. "My son would get more attached to my date than I would," says ,Bob. "I think he was looking for another mother but I don't like him to do that because he could get hurt again. I don't like to let him meet anybody I go out with unless I think she's going to be ardund for awhile." Adjusting to the children of their parents' new girlfriend or boyfriend can be tough on kids too. When they used to go tobogganing or to the movies with their father, Karen's children watched their father take his girlfriend's kids out to the same activities. "My daughter would sometimes come home from visiting her father feelingre- jected, especially when he was building a doll house for his girlfriend's daughter," says Karen. "I don't let my kids meet her (a girlfriend's) kids anymore. My kids said everything was great but it wasn't. They felt like they had to please me and make everything good. says Bob. Parents should co-operate One of the worst things parents can do is make the children choose between them and take sides. Though they may find it difficult, parents should try to co-operate for the sake of the children. "I don't care if two people break up but don't break up the kids. When children are involved, parents still have a bond between them and if they can't get along after the break-up, it's three times ,as hard on the kids. You should try to at least be on talking terms," says Bob: Something not to do is to force a child to call a new step-parent Mom or Dad. "No one can replace the real parents and most kids won't let that happen," says Ms. McLeod Out of the pain of a break-up, some parents and their children can see some Good. Though he is probably growing up twice as fast, Bob says his son is becoming independent and is learning to cook and take care of himself. Karen says her children have become more responsible. "The kids help out without being asked. I came home the other day and found they'll defrosted the freezer." With money a little scarcer, Karen's children have also found ways to earn or make what they want. "Before we used to get whatever we wanted, but now we have to earn it or make it ourselves. We just made a water slide out of a piece of plastic instead of buying one that was already made," says her daughter. Need each other The break-up has also made both the parents and the children appreciate each' other a little more. "I found out I need them as much as they need me," says Karen. With time and 'support,' wounds begin to heal and separated families look toward their futures with softie optimism. Karen's children say things are starting to get better again. Though they used to wish their parents could get back together again, they're glad their parents aren't fighting anymore. Both Karen's son and daughter agree on their advice to other kids Whose parents break up. "Try and help your parents. And, it's all right. It'll work out someday," they say. Battered women find some help .... • from page 1 single . parents; and• women who are living with their husbands. • Since it was organized just over a year ago Survival Through Friendship has made great strides. The group has helped many women through crises. Volunteers • have gone with women to lawyer's offices and to the courts to offer moral support. The grog has provided mothers. and children with clothing and food, shelter and friendship. Teenagers and grandmothers have been involved in Survival Through Friendship, but the concentrated group sees women between the ages of 22 and 31, mothers of small children. Organizers stress that Survival. Through Friendship does not provide counselling, but it does have information where such ser- vices are. available. The group does, as it's name explains, provides, Survival Through Friendship. The morning discussion groups include a variety of activities from cooking skills to presenta- tions from the Huron County Health Unit and home economists, teachers and nurses including topics on sewing, nutrition, paren- ting and budgeting. The group has held bake sales, and the women are presently making quilt tops, so everyone will have a comforter for' Christmas. Survival Through Friendship attempts to offer an island uf, relief: for; women who face domestic problems. The organization also provides a system • of "Safe . Houses" throughout Huron County, for women and children who need immediate help and escape. The anonymous, well protected "Safe Houses" are situated throughout the county. They offer overnight accommodation for women in need. Survival Through Friendship is an in- terdenominational group; supported.., by local churches. It's organized and maintain- ed by 16 volunteers who sit on a board of directors. There are trustees of money, an executive, a property, program and ex ecutive committee., • The concept behind this Goderich based group is not a new one. It follows a similar organization in Manitoba. The objective is to provide a service, specifically designed to meet the needs of rural women. Women's stress studied CLINTON - Janie Gattinger, from the Huron Centre for Children and Youth, was the guest speaker at the October 9 meeting of the Zeta Omega chapter of the Clutton Beta Sigma Phi.• She spoke about stress on women - the • causes, coping with it and how to minimize it. •. The .group was given a questionnaire on how to score individual stress levels. The presentation ended with relaxation exercises that could be done at the office, twice a day to alleviate stress. Thirteen Sorority members were present at the meeting, along with two guests from Seaiorin. Ellen Colson reported . on the recent fashion show, noting that is was a great success and proceeds would go to Clinton Public Hospital. Thanks went out the merchants who donated door prizes and props for the show. Marilyn Tyndall reminded everyone of upcoming events - the trip to Cullens Barn and the • Elizabethan Feest at Nancy Klomps' home. The ..Sorority talked about taking over duties of the Block. Parent program in Clinton. - The next meeting was scheduled for October 23 at Nancy Klomps' home. NOTICE Ratepayers of The Town ,.of Clinton are reminded that the FOURTH INSTALLMENT of 1984 Taxes Is due and payable by November 15, 1984. C. PROCTOR Clerk Town of Clinton FIRST PROGRAMME -ltM1Fr SUNDAY, OCTOBER 28 AT 1:30 PM JUST NEIGHBOURS Hi neighbours f I'm Neal Lowey your host on "Just Neighbours" a half hour weekly Gospel T. V. Program "Just Neighbours"" is produced in HoIrnesv lle in colour by our neigh hours with something to share. DOW f m sus of CABLE 12 SUNDAYS At 1:30 PM (AND REPEATED MONDAYS JUST AFTER LION'S 81N(0) 1