The Goderich Signal-Star, 1975-03-06, Page 15wt
S.UGR '.N' SPICE by Blit SMILEY
I think we'll all agree that
there is nothing quite so
downright miserable and an-
noying as the person who
• delights ill saying "I told you
so." Certainly, all married men
will agree with me.
Most of us know perfectly
well that we are poor little
lambs who have lost our way,
that we have feet of clay and
bones for brains. But we hate
being remindedof it.
It seems to me that there is
nothing more redundant than to
wake up with" a hangover,
mouth full of the bottom of a
birdcage, head full of porcupine
quills, and have a smirking,
self-sa9sfied voice grating
"Well, I warned you, but you
. wouldn't listen to me."
Who needs it? Who needs a
post-mortem; when he is still
alive, though, barely? I -speak
not from experience, of course,
but from hearsay. Not ad-
missible in court.
.Afterthat preamble, I have
to admit that I told you so. I told
the whole nation so. But nobody
listened. n
It must have been a couple of
years ago, when I warned, in no
uncertain terms, that the rest
° of us were going to be picking
• up the tabs for Napoleon
Drapeau's belief that he is
really a ,reincarnation of the
Kt infamous emperor.
Or maybe it's Caesar he
thinks he is. Certainly he is
giving us members of the
populace, bread and circuses,
as Caesar did.- Mighty„ .light on
the bread- and heavy 'on the
circuses.
I said it right here, in black
and white, that 'the mayor of
.__.--_.Montreals g_ in to take us
for a fast buggy -ride, when he
got the Olympic Games. 'For
Canada?, Don't. be silly. For
Montreal.
The handwriting is now on
the wall, loud and clear. And as
fast as -M. Drapeau rubs it off,
or licks it off with his eloquent
labial organ, it reappears.
It seems inevitable that you
and me, sistern and brethren,
are going to be picking up a big,
fat tab for the 1976 Montreal
Games. And games is the word,
if' the Olympics consist_ of
running in ever -decreasing
circles until you disappear up
your own you -know -what.
Let's not 'blame it on the
construction strikes in Mon-
treal. Let's not blame it on
inflation. Let's blame the $300
million dollar 'deficit (and who
knows how much more?), on
the delusions of grandeur of the
rolyiest-polyiest con man since
P. T. Barnum made that im=
mortal statement:, "Never, give
a sucker an even break."
Hank Bourassa of Quebec
and Pete Trudeau of Ottawa
knew they were dealing with a
greased eel when they tangled
with°Drapeau, but all they did
was make _polite . political
noises, assuri'ng the " sucker's
that it wasn't going to cost
more than maybe seven cents
each to put , ,on this ex-
travagorama.
Some of us, those possessing
the gift, and a memory, knew
perfectly well that we were
going to be reamed like an old
pipe, but they wouldn't listen.
Oh, well, what the hell. A.
•prophet is without honor in his
.. own country. You in your small
cornea; andl in mine.
My severest critic of my
point of view is not my wife, as •
is most often the case. She
thinks ' the Games are
something the teenagers play
down. .at the t Olympia
restaurant. The only ' con-
' nection is that the proprietors'
of the Olympia are Greek. '
No, . my chief opposition
comes from my, assistant
° depart'ment head, 'which only
confirms my long -held 'view
that she is bigoted, thick-
headed, disloyal, to her chief,
d ' 1 . lousy shuffleboard
layer.
Her argument goes like this:
"The Olympic Games are for
and Canada. Why shouldn't all
Canadians help pay for them?"
Well, she's all wet, in which
she -wouldn't weigh 85 pounds,
soaking.
„Nobody asked me if I wanted
o the stupid Olympic Farce in
Canada. And even though I
wasn't asked, I said NO.
By me, the Olympic Games
.consist of someone proving that
he or she can do something
completely useless better than
anyone else.. •
If Mayor Drapeau had -shown
any desire to clean .up Mon-
treal, which has the worst
slums, ,the worst sewage
system, probably the highest
crime rate in Canada, I'd buy a
whole ten -dollar lottery ticket,
instead of splitting one 10 ways.
He's not interested. He wants
coliseums, palaces, and
probably wouldn't object to a
few graven images of himself
scattered about the city.
Did you notice that when the
Olympic Committee was on the
edge of the abyss, looking into
it, there wasn't exactly a
scramble among, theworld's
nations to pick up the tab?
The only tentative offer was
from the Arab swingers, who
are in similar circumstances to
the old lady who lived in a shoe.
They have so many barrels
they don't know what to do.
,Admitted, barrels are , better—
than children these days, but
there's a limit.
Say. 'Pardon me for a
moment. Just had a thought.
Those Arabs are buying up
practically anything these
days. 'Wonder if they'd be in-
terested in some fine moose
pasture I own up north. Used to
be called mining stocks. -
' Probably not. Hovvever,
maybe they'd take a flyer on a
pure-bred hybrid cat. Half wolf,
half pig. And by golly, the price
is right. This gem, this jewel,
this loving, lovable creation is
going for four quarts of oil and
a one -billionth share in the Holy
Old Eruption Oil Company.
Now, how did I get away off
here in the oil fields? Let's. see.
Trudeau, oily. Bourassa, oilier.
,Drapeau, oiliest.
• A simple matter of 'con-
jugation.
News from the iibrarg
BY COUNTY LIBRARIAN
BILL PARTRIDGE
Last Week, in Blyth, "Take a
.Beaver -to • Lunch",• ' starring,'
Dave Broadfoot and • Carol
-Robin son-was-perf ormeed- in -the --
Memorial Hall. For those
persons jnterested in some of
Mr. Broadfoot's books, the
W Library has 'Sex and Security'.
I understand the two per-
formers visited the Blyth
branch where Mr. `Broadfoot
inquired .whether the Huron
County Library had his'book.
There will be a book sale at
the Goderich Branch, 52
Montreal Street; this,Saturday,
March 8 at 10:00 a.m. All
hardbound books will be selling
for 10c a piece. Come and see
the selection.
The first of the Community
Film Cinema sponsored by the
Huron'County Library and the
National Film Board will be
held on Monday, March 10 at
8:00 p.m.Topic of films and
discussion is. 'Working
Mothers'. 4
Mrs. R. Forster, of the
National Film Board in Kit-
chener, has agreed to lead the
discussion. The topic is of
current interest and the
evening will bevvorthwhile:
. Not all books concern distant
places and ephemeral subjects.
.Two books 'Dragon on Parade'
and 'The Armbro Story' take
place in Huron "County
'Dragon on Parade' by Mary
Alice Downie is a children's
book concerning a family' on
vacation in Bayfield. The main
attraction is the Summer Lion's
Parade.
The Armbro Story by Peter
Lewington ,. concerns the
Armstrongs who lived close to
~ Y
Exeter. This family was in-
volved in eveCything from
.:cattle and.hor-se,,Iar, ding.t:DAhe
evolution of , new building
techniques. ..
These books are only a few of
t -he --neve tizIes—in- the Huron
County Library.
HURONV'LE VY
As a result of the visiting
restrictions at• the Home,
several of the regular events
have been cancelled,.
Mrs. - Elsie Henderson,
Norman • Speir'and Jerry
Collins provided the, old time..
music' for' Monday's activities
along with several numbers by
the Huroriview Rhythm Band.
The residepts practised .square
dancing with Mrs. McGratton
doing the calling. '
Slidepictures that -have been
taken during the past four
years of special events were
shown in each of the areas
during the week.
GODER1C)1 SIGNAL -STAR, THIIRsDAYI M RCU,6,19751- 4
Theatre Passe Muraille
returning- to Blyth
The Theatre Passe Muraille,
who are `a well-known Toronto
Theatre group, will be retur-
ning to this area this corning
Sunday March 9, when they
present the show "Naked on the—
North Shore" at the Blyth
Memorial Hall at 2:30 p.m.
"Naked on the North Shore"
is more than a c5ne-man play.
It's a natural piece of en-
tertainment that is both
fascinating and enlightening.
'Certainly there are few actors
who could bring such a' work
off. Ted Johns not only makes it
succeed; he makes it succeed
beautifully. „
A native of Mitchell, Ted
Johns spent..., a year 1967-68
teaching a grade six -seven
class at Old 'Fort Bay which is
located near the Straits, of Belle
Isle ori the north shore of the St.
Lawrence. He then turned his
talents to ' acting, but his ex-
periences in Old Fort Bay
stayed with , him and he
returned to the area with the
intentions of , doing a theatre
piece about it.
It is difficult for a person
from, the south to adjust to a
_comunity like Old Fort Bay,
says actor Ted Johns.
"It isn't just the fact that
you're from the south and
obviously an 'outs'ider', but you
a 're totally unprepared for the
extreme isolation."
'"Naked on the North Shore"
received rave reviews when it
opened in Toronto. More im-
portantly, it was equally as"wel'1
received when Johns toure0
Newfoundland with it for two
weeks this past August.
He described audiences there
as being "some of the
toughest" he hays ever played
to. At the same time, he says,
"They were extremely' kind."
Quite apart from en-
tertainme0t, Johns. hopes that
"Naked on the North Shore"
will inspire people to,do
something about this '"relly
neglected part of Canada,"
At least one person got the
message. Recently discussing
the play, Johns said that one
girl from Cobalt who saw
"Naked on the North Shore"
when it was performed at the
Miner's Festival in Englehart
last summer dectded'to teach in
, the isolated area.
"I've had one 'letter from, leer
and she seems to be.doing very
well," Johns said. "This is the
Huron Camera Club
plans monthly program
A spring photographic outing Eric Carmen,
was tentatively planned - .for -
1VI"a elr9. at• t'i'e i ar tionthrl 4114. W e i.�,.r:y;.-., pxogr a m
r.eg.0 .y.......
meeting of, the Huron Camera chairman, has formulated a
Club. .The group meets at
Robertson Memorial School
library •on, the first and third
u d h th t800
The fourth in aft. creative
photography camera series
was presented; the subject was
composition. A demonstration
On the development of black
;lnri vvhitr flip-) wno given by
program. through Dec, 23, 1975.
Incorporated in tl
are--Kod i� mont
tations and worksh
Watts, DougWilliai
Gregg.
Anyone wishing
their photographi
should :drop , in
meeting. ,
kind of thing I hope will happen.
I hope that people when they
see it will want to do something
- even if it's just church groups
or school kids writing to the '
people there - that would be
great,"
,Johns who has appeared in
two , Theatre Passe Muraille
productions here, "Tli'"e Farm
Show" and "The Donnellys,"
hopes people will be interested
enough in the subject to get out
and see the show which will
play at the Blyth Memorial
Hall, March 9 at 2:30p.m.
Referring to the great
amount of,publicity engendered
by Theatre Passe Muraille's
latest production which opened
last month in Toronto, Johns
hastened to point out, "You
better tell the people that
"Naked on the North Shore"
has nothing to do with "I Love
You Baby Blue" - it isn't that
kind of show."
a'Naked on the North Shore"
was directed by Paul Thorn,
„son. Set. designs for the play
were done by local artist Bill
Acres of RR 1, Gowanstown
who spent some time in Old
Fort Baybefore doing his work.
.y
Our fee' is remarkably low. And, .
it' the 'Vax l)epal'tnlent nOtiWxes' you
of a reassessment on your return,
H- & f'loc'k is available t4) help
you all '(.'lel' at no extra cost.
It
never do my own.
taxes tgain!
19 VICTORIA ST., N., -GODERICH
(HIGHWAY 21 Beside Presbyterian Church)
Open 9 a.m. to 8 p.m. weekdays 9-5 Saturdays -
Phone 524- 8658
Also 3 Rattenbury Street, Clinton
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