The Goderich Signal-Star, 1970-05-07, Page 17a
ICJ 14AL-STArtiTHOS AY .11411).*
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•
Adjustments after war
DEAR ANN LANOMS: Do
you happen to know how many
marriages end. in divorce after
the husband returns . from
Vietnam? Every wife whose.
husband has spent, time in the
service knows the problems of
adjusting. Wives change in" a
year. So do ' hu.abands. How
much can, we -blame on the war?
Our marriage had a solid
foundation - Seven years of
love,trust, laughter and tears.
My ,husband recently had a
complete physical ,checkup
Which he passed with flying
colors. He announced with
considerable pride that he was in
"great shape." -I'm sure he didn't
tell the doctor his sex drive is
-down to zero., If I insist, he
grudgingly accommodates me
once or twice a month. ,Blit I
hate asking him. It's ,degrading
to a woman to practically beg
her hu'sband'to-makelove to her.
The children get op .his
nerves; which they never did
before. I ean't please him no,
matter how hard I try. He used
td get along with my family.
Now they get on his nerves, too.
'He. leaves, when they come to
visit.
My husband is a field grade
officer with two college degrees..
I have one. We share„ the same
interests - or did. I say he .is
mentally. fatigued: He says no.
He has been* home rrearly a year
and I am lonelier now than when
he was overseas. At least -when
we were separated by an ocean
, he -wrote four oreefive letters a
week. Now .ire rarely_ speak. I
can't live the rest of my life like
this. Please help me. - EMPTY
AND SEARCHING
DEAR E AND S: Nearly -one
marriage out of three hits the
divorce courts these days even'
without Vietnam. '
reeeive dozens of letters
from women whose husbands
have suddenly lost interest in sex
and.they,'ve never been separated
by a creek, let alone an oeean.
Sometimesthere's another
woman. Sometimes it's the male
Menopause.
I suggest joint counselling. If
he refuses to go - go alone.
Any One acquaint:01 with id-Months,old Terry often sees
the twinkling look he's wearing here. This baby. of Irish -
English descent is an outgeihg, good natured boy who rarely
fusses and for whom life is a big, 'happy adventure.
Terry is a' slim, small -boned baby with brown eyes,
scant brown hair and ' very fair skim:, He was slightly
premature and was at first, abOut a month behind the
average for his age, but has pretty well "caught up new. He
crawls -all over and can pull. himself up to stand. He is in
good health .and,there.are no -problems in his care.
e This little fellow is Shy with; strangers, but affeeticinate
and lovable among friends. He needs parents who will.enjoy
a. dear littie.son.without.eoncern about his prematurity.
Toinquire abOut adopting .Terry please write to Today:5.
Child, Department of Social' -and Family Services, Parlia-
Med For general adoption informa-
tion ask your Children's Aid' Society.
James -Richardson St Sons Ltd
•
Serving The Feed Dealers .ef Western Ontario
PHONE 524-8388, GODERICH
You're bound to . learn
something Wet will help you
-make the right decision.
DEAR ANN LANDER,S: We
are what you might, call the
Trapped Segment of Society
Middle 'America. We don't
qualify for welfare hecaultaX
husband has 'a good job: But the
cost of living has skyrocketed So,
we are barely making it from
paycheck to paycheck.
• Most of our friends are in the
same fix. Nobody tries to kid
anyone. Now the problem: We
don't eat out very often,. but
when we clot it is understood in
our crowd that everyone pays
• his own check.
• Last week I telephoned a
couple we didn't know very well
and asked' if they'd like to join
us for dinner. Phoenix lias some
good &ating places .and we
picked one of the best. When'the
waiter brought the che?k the
man just sat thpre, After about
ten minutes of . nervous
conversation, my husband took
it. The man and his wife smiled
and isaid, "Thank you for
inv it
The bill was Just about what I
spend on a•week's groceries. My
husband and I were
dumbfounded. What do .you
think of this? -- PAYCHECK IN
ASHES
DEAR PAY: Rise from the
ashes, Phoenix, and face facts.
When you invite people to
dinner they have the right to
assume -they are your guests -
unless,, of tourse, it is made clear
. in advance that the evening is to
be a Dutch Treat.
Went for a chest X-ray to,
day and had quite a reminisce
• with the doctor Who examined
me. It turned out that he was
the second -in -command at a
sanatorium where I spent one.
of,,the most dreary years of ny
life.,
)4)
NOLD
SUZIE1. TODAY§
NIEDICINE,5
ARFPOTEN
-
-ARE. YOU
SuE1iATs 111E
MPicIN-
SltOULP13F...
'TAKING?
'-fe-,5re-AGiRS
V'ER r,Y.PARE Nis
To TAKE. 1-4-1EeK
°Wel MEDICINES MUST'
TO READ
-THE. L-A9E-t- 'FIPST
0‘,
'11e's re• tired now and. does
this work, as ti part-time thjng.
He told me I wouldn't believe
what has happened to the San.
When 1 was -there,' it held
Omit 1,500 patients.: It -now
has 300. Average length of
stay *then' was 18 months. To-
day it is three months;
T.B. wasn't a comparatively
simple thing when I was there.
Three people died in three
months in one ward I was, in,
because their lungs were so
rotten they , couldn't breathe.
Two of them were in their
The tensions, frustrations.
and monotony of life in a sana-
torium have been described of -
.ten enough. It was like being
'in jail, except you couldn't
walk , around. And always,
liovering in the air, like a cou-
ple • ' of vultures, were two
things: Surgery. and your "cul-
ture".
Surgery meant hacking out
- most of your ribs on one "Iide,
to collapse a .lung that was too
far gone, or removal of the
lung.
#
If your "culture", a sputum
test, ,btoke down ithin 12
weeks,- you_had-another three
or six -months added -to.-your
sentence.
I was lucky. AILI-had.was..a
shadow -on my lung. -I felt fine.
I never had a "positive" result
from testS; - and I:couldn't -even
mbstcr enou7,11 .sputum for, a
culture. But it still wasn't
much fun.
PerVes I acclimatized bet-
ter than mast. I'd had a Year in
prison came, net too long be-
fore good training for life
in the San. I had learned that
lime does pass, however snaik
like, in SUCI1 CirCUMStUlees.
But 1"was dreadinlir )oneb,
at' first, and pretty resentful •
toward the -gods. 1 had been
married six weeks when the
shadow on the lung was discov-
ered. iAbout a Aveek later;
something else was discovered.
My wife was pregnant. We
were ahout '200 miles apart,
.with no money for train trips
to visit. ,This wo the worst
pellrioodyjr tiines, change. Nowa-
days my wife thinks nothing of
spending $10 on a long-dis-
tance call to one of the kids,
for no particular ream. In
those days, I was on full pelt;
sion. I think it was $55 a
month, and the governneent
kept back $15 of it to help pay
fer my 'keep. •
So it was letters, One a day.
There's -still---a-bushel basket ef
them in the attic, full of pur-
ple prose; what we'd call the
baby, and Stuff. I feel like an
old fool when I read them now,
'and my.wife weeps and won-
ders why 1 don't write poems
and'tooey stuff to her nowa-
days.
But I shook down into life at
the San, and as always in retro-
Specti remember mostly the
good things, and the funny
things.
I began a writing course
and won a prize. I wrote
scripts for the San radio sta-
tion. I played chess .for „hours a
day with the guy in the next,
,
77.0.117NOUR
CFHC
—
bed and hecanleia t(Ilrables, „
though ''ciratie,7.piayer
of us were yeung, vetor.
ans, and We had a COVlaitt es-
prit de corpsi• which meant:"
boating the establishment, For
example, the food wO.nourish-
ing, btetclotASY, like all .inSlitu..
tion food„One chap had, a wife
who stnualed in 'Aeon And.;
eggs and onions.. Every
• about an hour after the nurses,
had snuggled down, and
while the night nurse SMeked,
and drank coffee, the ,action.
would begin.
Out would come the 'illicit'
Ihot ' plate, and '•the forbidden
(frying pan, The spryest,
usual-
ly,I, would whack up a great,
reeking feed. And with one
lamp, carefully screened, we'd
play poker until 4 a.m. No
etonder they had trouble rous-
ing. us at five for our morning
Wash.
If it was a special occasion„
maybe a birthday, we'd chip in,
and buy a mickey. Oh, yes. We
had a blootlegger who was
also a bookmaker ' — among
the patients. He was tubercular
and also diabetic, dying on his
feet, but he. staggered around
the wards each day, taking
bets and orders.
You'd be surprised bow far a
mickey -goes 'among .four T.B.
cases, when they hayen't had
anything stronger than milk
for o Month. Like most of life,
it'asn't all_ had.
AUTO INSURANCE
INSURANCE
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GENERAL—INSURANCE AGENT
46'WEST ST:
_524-9442
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