HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Goderich Signal-Star, 1970-04-23, Page 17t l \j a ho. enquireds "Are a n■ t pram
.was is front '1"U t ct t no : front
I hate to refer to. it .again, bolt d an exac; • counter•` art m: theao n. t
the e t p to re "I,' '44 not b . .Eearl$on� •..•Whit ^ napex has, laeraan. o� Genu .. Huniter "'"�'. x, o argue, but;
evoked such~ legions, of epithets! las waited .for his; depurture..``See to
Some it a � Weston (knowd Ler") familiarly o it. that formal receipts'are
S me - eaU , .. du ctto ad t : _ _ u . _ -
�'I1:><n er: 1'�illlt,�e� � who {obtained ""Oar thisfl~
absurdum.' Others, and 1 prQfer d the: 8thCps and all ..-.. material,.
• aomlrrta�a ed h corps he ordered..
the others, call it an outstanding whose great* claim to fame was
41• example, of:thel-Negative Lesson, that he was' credited with being Good old I arnby. When the
A classic example of how NOT. ° . able. to � recite' the correct whole division ; was .surrounded
to introduce revolutionhe 'was 4i,1!. quite 'unperturbed,-,
` • �Y nomenclature for every• part �• .
changes in the already confused the G.S. Water Cart. Still admonishing all and, sundry
income- tax regulatiOns, not to. __,__. _ Juncture, a re :�luc theye
• At– -this, lrt tuxe,!"� neral.. to , realise �ctW , . , l� . Were
re
mention Form, T1., How NOT to Hornbys Y wild - eye` used to' to. be present on such. an historic
'stimulate ' the ' Canadian ; accompany ` some ` wild orders occasion, 'when. the very life of
m economy. If we except:' Harold and, admonitions for the Britain Was threatened. But`we
Wilson, it can be stated without ,He must back tai the Canal 'hurry
furtherance• of the war:.
fear of contradiction, that , no rejoiced amongst other things, in . Bank and 'see what happened at
politician of recent. years has inventing what he called "pro t, h e^ . ' B' a' El e p h a.n t
managed Co depress the animals t nForgive f o xm a.s,, .These. were- I�I'mainstxaio ,.�, ,give the
to the extent achieved by the jell .
l y graphed sheets • of paper , stiverslon, , but, you had to know
White -- Paper. None has with headings which were about Hornby,
demonstrated the same supposed to, remind you of. the On ' its first arrival, in our
ineptitude. None shown so relevant details of the report you . midst, I had been the chosen
patently how NOT to act: None were required to, make upon -this instrument . to• discover the
the same 'facility for getting his sheet. One,night, Kapp's patrol intricacies of the "Baby
foot into his mouth., No *Man's Land had been Elephant" It was natural that I
But it was the use of the `phenomenal and he had, sent in a , should expect that I would have
expression "Negative Lesson," • fun report, with much suggestive to demonstrate its method, of
which tickle the antenna of
,d information to assist future erection to , the assembled
association and of recollection, raids. But the Olympian officers. This bringsus to Major
Its was this expression which comment was: "Too flowery for C. E. Egerton, M.C., R.EP, a
took me back to the Canal Ba.,i1k, . a military report." Our Chieftain ° regular Sapper commanding our
just horth of Ypres around could not encourage anything Field Company. I first spied him,
Cliristmai 1916 when a grateful , , which bore the semblance of the , inhis usual early morning
government sent out to the mental method of a world attitude which resembled a
Front, for the better protection before the war. I recall too, an heron standing on one leg. The
- and `comfort' of the Troops, a occasion when 1 personally came while he picked his teeth, as he
new contraption called a '"Baby under the lash of his tongue. It considered - what he -would' fall
Elephapt • Shelter." Its was an occasion around •March upon that day. Finally he
components were quadrants of ° -24t14 1918 when General von , ,decided to come over to the
8 -gauge corrugated • iron, set. to a' Hutier's Eighteenth Army drove multitude on the wast bank, for
radius of perhaps five feet. Each : the British XVIII Corps on to there • too was. the C.S.M.. to
section ,was two feet wide. The the Crozet.. Canal. We were far ,. whom he .usually made
ends of each section were drilled " too thin on' the ground. The snide remark, 'since
to 'take bolts and nuts to secure forward divisions were unfortunate man had
their base to an angle iron and overwhelmed, while those in. me d i o e re knowledge,
their tops to a ridge mem
bet
'support were ordered bark to
- Y Needless to say there were, two garrison a line on which it was
o sizes of bolt and consequently expected to hold the Germans
-two . sizes of hole in each section.. up: I was busy loading R.E.
The ridge member •and=the angle stores.•- to prevent: _them- falling-
irons
alling
irons were -long enc gni -to: take• into German hands. Alt the
three sections on. either, side of portents towards the East were
the ridge; so that •the final result that time was of the essence.
was a six foot long. semi -circular Smoke was rising from farms
cave, 10 feet_ wide at the base :and villages; dumps .of shells
and five feet at its highest point. 'were being blown up; airfields _
The... id1 a -was 'thut-tithe infantry were burning their fuel supplies.
– themselves could assemble six intoday's language the air was
foot or even longer lengths of somewhat `polluted.' Hornby
shelter:: according– to taste; set • was suddenly by my side as- L =-
them
them in, an open cut in the egged on' my . men. "Why are
ground, lump earth, sandbags; these stores being loaded up?"
fill, bits of concrete, road metal
etc., on top. Then sleep inside
praying that no direct hit would
disturb their slumbers. .
Geiferal;:Hornby,• commanding
the 117th Brigade, has decided °
that we, his Field Company
R.E., should instruct the Pioneer
Officers of each battalion in ,the
assembly of - the parts and the
rendezvous was set on the west
side of the Canal Bank, that is
the side - farthest from the
' Bosche. So there -it was that the
Company Sergeant Major had
had' all 'the -oar deposited;
'.enough for one shelter.. The
quarter sections of elephant; the
two angleirons; the ridge piece,
a ;bag of bolts and nuts and two
spanners, the handles of which
were ., so ' fashioned that they
could alternately spear the palm
of the hand which held them or,
on occasion, act as drifts to
enable .. ,coincidence • to be
• achieved between the hole in the
. ridge or angle and the hole in the
corrugated section. '
1,000 hours and all was laid
-out. , Assembled were the
`disinterested'' . Pioneer•. officers
and there too, was the General,
whose . 'approach caused the
bravest to quail, for he was.
'what, in those far off days, was
' • known as. • "something of „a
martinet." There must have been
something in the chemistry of
the men of the General's vintage
some
the
a very
of
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englnee and tad'been chosen
his lob because hey Was, ?►
for h
lnfanty reservist and Was.
expected to put some drill and'
discipline into the Co m .an
P y
At last he.saw the General,
saluted and 'wished . him well.
Just as I expected his nod' 'to
begin • the , demonstration, •'.leu
turned to the General to
announce that he, himself would
conduct the' lesson, I knew; the
j(new; and • 0! ' cowtie °
Egea<toh. himself knew, that he
.knew nothing about., the.
^`mechariicsr of "Baby Elephants."'
The -only people. ignorant of this
fact were the- General and the
assembled officers.. So Egerton,
assisted by Sergeant Straughan
of Number 4 Section, started to
assemble and it . did not take
them very long before they had
evolved ,the most awful
shambles. 'Whenever I tried to
get them on to the right `lines
again, Egerton would push me
away.' He was positively
indefatigable in his ingenuity to
fail to match one ' part with
another. He cannot possibly
have had any aptitude for shapes
or sizes; it was a case of what the
psychologists ° call today ' "no
spatial perception."
It was now well after 1,100
Hours, and there was as little
progress in the assembly of the
"Baby" as before Egerton came
on the ground. His audience was
• becoming restless; one or .two,
escaping the eagle eye of the
General, slipped away. ' But
General. Hornby himself,
fcinated by anything of this
--nature, remained, •though it;,,was
BY G. Mact,EOD ROSS .., ,.
�.. YTS .. ��.. hat the - t ,incl l ofremaine
clear to the most crilal Observer ' clear to. gerton that the stuex-
that his choler • was close ,to bath had .achieved, .the desired'
explosion point, . • Lally he •
Could stand it no longer and' he
called , Egerton to him, to
remonstrate. But Egerton,_
though he must have; known he
was beaten, refused to *admit•it.
Instead he called . once again on
the skill he used so often to keep. Y
his men ' out of -,trouble. He
explained to Central'Hornby
that in his 1>Im ted •E•experj nce,
the best way _ to teaeh'& routine
was to show all tke •aynags :it 'was
possible to ,make, thus ensuring
the studenk would not fall; into
the traps; ' This explanation'
mollified • the Generale for a;+
second. But then he returned to
the charge and nadent- amply
clear that that was not his
method of teaching. There
would be another lesson on the
morrow and Egerton would not
be the demonstrater.
Later on Egerton admitted
that it had been a very narrow
shave. So narrow in fact that he
decided to 'attempt to retrieve
his position in the " General's
good • books by sending some
men along to rig -up a shower
bath for the old man. You know
the kind of plumbing I mean. A
timber frame to support a tank;
the sides of the framework
covered in "Canvas Hessian
Green"; the tank filled by means
of .a lift and force pump, worked
by -the General's batman, which
filled the overhead tank, with
the stinking water .from the
Yperlee river running alongside
the Bank. ' - ' "
Later still; when it was not,
result; . the degree of "sweetness
and• light which, the . General
exuded was -inadequate,. Egerton
„sent the Section ; eaarlta.rnd
. _ xg
to the .donor of the General's
dugout to t sing Christmas Carols
on ,Christmas Eve. That did the
�'
trick for the timebeing» w,>
if, by now you ,have lost the
pointe of the story,it is that
Egerton's demonstration of how.
,to erect a Baby Elephant Shelter
was just as, negative a lesson. as
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