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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Exeter Advocate, 1892-8-4, Page 7LALIGI-1 AND LEARN. X wanted the eweep of the wild wet weather, The wind's loug teeth, and the rain's free fall, The toss of the trees as they svvayed together, The measureless gray that Ives over them all; 'Whose roar epeaes more than a language spoken, Wordless and wonderful, ory on cry, he sob oP an earth that is vexect and broken, The answering sob of a broken sky. 'What could they tell us? We see them ever. The trees, and the sky, and. the stretch of the land But they g;ive us a word of their secret never; They toil no story we understand. aKet haply the ghostlike birch out yonder Knows much in a placid and silent way; 'The rain might tell what the gray clouds ponder, The winds repeat what the violets say. Why weeps the rain ? Do you know its sorrow Do you know why the wind is so sad, so sad? lave you stood in a rift; 'twat a day and: a morrow, h Seen their ands meet and their eyes grow glad? Is the tree's pride strong at its top's abase- ment? Is the white rose more of a saint than the red? "What thinks the star as it secs through the casement A young girl lying, beautiful, dead? Any pretty woman can cure a sick hus- band. by simply looking in the mirror when he take about dying. He—I called ou you the other night and you were out. She—Yes. You rang the bell twice, didn't you ? Chapley—My man struck this morning, .confound him. Van Pelt—What was the trouble ? Chepley—I let my wife buy me some new cravats, 'e Dashaway—How cliti youslike my friend, Hunker? Travers—He hasix'st any back. bone. Why, the fellow let me have $5 as soon as I asked him. " No," said Mrs. De Porque, we don't mind expense when it comes to our library. Some of the books, 1 am informed, are printed from diamond type." Drummer—And do you mean to say that you never have any of your goods thrown back on your hands? His travelling ac- quaintance—No, sir ; I'm an undertaker. Mr. Bullion—Yes, my wife and daughter are in Europe, shopping. Mr, Scadds—Iu Paris? Mr. Bullion—No. I told them I wouldn't pay for any but an English -speak• ing nobleman. • In these days of putting up jellies it should be recalled that cotton batting is more often used by experienced housekeep- ers to cover the glasses than paste or papers dipped in liquor. Jess—I thought you hated Jack, and yet you accepted him. Bess -1 did hate him ; but he proposed under an umbrella., and mid if I refused him he would let the rain drip on my new hat. Mrs. Bingley—How is e our daughter get- ting along with her new music teacher? Mrs. Pinkerley—Splendiefly. She has only known him three weeks met he has already proposed three times. Cholly—Why don't you d ischawge youah man if he gets dwunk ? 0 epie—He nevah gets dwunk except on Beglish holidays. holly—The deoce you say 1 Then I shall dischawge my man foh not getting dwunk in the same way. She—Your parents had always objected, eh? He—Yes. She—But when you came to ask her parents for their consent you found that the shoe was on the other foot, eh? He (simply)—I didn't stop to see which foot it was. "1 judge that you have not written much poetry," said the editor to his caller after examining his manuscript. "No, sir ; but how did you know?" " In these verses you speak of e. maiden as sitting at her window. Now, in poems maidens never sit at any- thing so common as windows. They invari. ably use casements." The Doctor's Daughters is a new organi- zation of women in San Francisco, whose object is to relieve the need of poor people who are in distress on account of illness in the family. The " daughters " number about forty and there are 200 associate members who devote themselves to the work of raising funds and distributing them personally among the deserving sick poor. Much damage is done by brushing off dried mud from thin calf and kid boots with bard bristle brushes and still more by the .use of common blacking. In the case of ladies' boots, made of fine aud soft leather, both treatments are ruinous. When boots are very muddy remove the dirt with a damp sponge or a painter's sash tool and a little water. Glace kid boots, etc., should be sponged, allowed to dry and then thor- oughly polished with a soft rag or hand- kerchies which is slightly oiled occasionally. If a woman's hair shows much care, being glossy, well kept.and every pin in its place, you may rely upon it that she is a Duly, born and bred, whether her own or the deft fingers of a maid arranged it. Coarse hair shows humble birth. Brown hair as it rule, if of the,peculiarly fine character that it see m very thin, will Indicate a good die- positiou. Hair that splits in the ends is a representation of the owner's tendency to quarrel and have bickerings and differences on all occasions. Black, glossy hair shows treachery; blonde, fluffy hair, weakness and vanity, end red hair, temper but truth- fulness. The sort of heir known as drab, the kind so hard to match and awfully high ,priced •when one wants a false bang, reads thus—highly sensitive and touchy. Miss Ella Potts, a Chicago teacher, told !her Tupils one "composition day" that they might each write a letter to her making an •excuse for not inviting her to an imaginary birthday Tarty. The scholars were called upon in turn to read their letters aloud. ,One little girl made her excuse as Willows : "Dear Miss Potts I want to apologize for not asking you to come to my birthday Tarty yesterday. I fully intended to do so, but—as I always do in everything -1 put it •eaff until the last minute. When at last I started, and reached your gate, I saw the tlectoWit buggy standing there, and, thinls- iing some one was very ill, I did not go in. What was my consternation the next dayto ,learn that the doctor was courting your sister 1" In the halcyon days before the conquest • of the industrial world by the hustler it car - Tenter who had occasion to screw two pieces of wood together never thought of hammer- ing in" the screw nearly Op to the head and breaking and destroying the tehacity of the wood around it, and then ending it home with a half turn or so ; but he first carefully 'bored a hole a eize smaller than the screw, then countersunk the opening and eerewed • the screw in all the waythrough solidwood. Citreful provision was also made for the un- doing of the work without damage in case it should become necessary. In fact, with some workmen these things were religious duties. An old English carpenter, on his deathbed, when asked if he wore prepared to die, answered: "Why not? I've worked at my trade fifty yaar, and never dray a ,eereve without greasin' it." The fad of the Summer girl ie white chamois gloves. They are worn to travel, to row, to ride, to dance in, and aro very ueeful bet not pretty, In the tad place, they are too thicsk, and they do not fit with the nidety that gives a wallah's hand a eertain twist°. .eratiO air, Yet they are very cheap, are weshed easily and are therefore popular ; but down he the heart of every eesentially womanly woman there is a longing for the delicate grays, pale tans or the higher clam of white suede e that are as periehable as they ere expensive. No inatter whether shoes or gloves be high priced or not, let them be free from holes; let shoelaces be of silk and in good condition. If varnish is needed do not let an hour go by before the shoes are polished up, and when the gloves are wiled wash, clean or discard them, es you eee fit, for otherwise they spoil the prettiest oostume. A promising journalist having capitu- lated to the faseinations of a bright I3oston girl, that cruel creature now alludes to him as her papier macho. The eruption of Mount 'Etna is steadily growing worse. What ails the creter ? He—What an engaging girl she is 1 She —Yes, engaged to every other man in the room. Employer—You are not worth your salt to -day. What is the matter? Clerk (sleepily)—I got here on time. Evidently the Caucasian is playing out. Au organ grinder's monkey the other day whipped an American newsboy. Wool—When I go to it summer resort I leave all the money I have in the hotel safe. Van Pelt—On arriving or departing? The right side of the body perspires more than the left, and the palm of the hand four times more than the skin of the chest. During it long run over a rough road a bicyclist and his wheel .gradually exchanged conditions. He grew tired, while the wheel became untired. "But, my dear Harold, I cannot marry you. You can't support a wife on your salary." " Yes, Maude. It will suffice for you, and I—well, dearest, I will shift for myself." He—I think Dolly Griggon is terribly rude. I was telling her one of my best stories this afternoon and she fell asleep. She—That's strange ! She told me yester- day that she was troubled with insomnia. "Oh, many a shaft et random sent Finds mark the archer little meant," The largest return of jewelry made to the tax assessor by any private citizen of At- lanta is that of a negro. The books of the Atlanta tax receivers show a phenomenal increase in the wealth of negroes residing in that city. " Billings got his pension yet ?" " I didn't know Billings was entitled to a pension." "He thinks he is, anyway. He claims to have contracted a chronic case of that tired feeling from reading war articles in the magazines." Mrs. Darley (displaying her purchase)—I have bought these suspenders for Harry's birthday present. Mrs. Snooper—They are much too fine for a man to hide under his vest. Mrs. Darley—That's what I think, sol am going to wear them myself. Sugar gas is one of the enemies with which those who labor on boaid merchant vessels must contend. In Brooklyn the other day three longshoremen were over- come by the gas generated from a cargo of 1,400 tons of sugar. It took medical aid to restore them to consciousness. Clara (at the lawn party)—You see that gentleman over there with the wan smile. He has had such a sad history. Ile was engaged to the daughter of the wealthy Mr. Porker and just as he was about to marry her something terrible happened. Maud— Oh, do tell me 1 What was it? Clara— Her father married again. In a lecture on fire prevention, Professor Goodman again called attention to the value of wooden joists for building 'purposes as compared with iron and steel. He explained that the two latter materials lose their strength at a not very high temperature, whereas wood will sustain a hea wy stain for a much longer period when exposed to great heat. Ardent Republican—So your men are striking against a reduction of wages? Protected manufacturer—Yes. Ardent Republican—But I thought the McKinley Bili was passed that you should pay higher wages than are paid to the pauper labor of Europe. Protected manufacturer—Oh, no 1 only that we should be able to pay higher wages than are paid to the pauper labor of Europe. An English magazine has recently pro- pohnded a prize question which has agitated to their depths its numerous womanreaders. The question is : "Would you rather marry a man whom you entirely love, but whose love for you you are not sure of ; or a man who entirely loves you, but whose love you do not feel able to thoroughly reciprocate !" Many and various are the replies, but, with characteristic modesty, the majority of women feel sure that they would rather possess the man's devotion and remain im- partial themselves. An Atlanta lady who has travelled a great deal, but whose ideas of the lack of com- petition among- saleswomen in America are perhaps a trifle vague, recently said in an in interview : " Shop girls in London far surpass those in New York as regards per- sonal appearance and ability for mental cal- culation. They dress usually in black or some other dark color, all uniform, with black brilliantine aprons, with collar and cuffs. When you ask the price or estimate it is given so glibly that you are amazed, and this calculation ;is , entirely mental. Paper is rarely resorted to, unless, like my- self, the customer's mind is not so active as the clerk's. The secret of being able to ob• tain such service lies, of course, in competi- tion. Saleswomen are innumerable." Emergency Note& A book by Prof. B. G. Wilder of Cornell University furnishes these directions : If choked, get upon all fours and cough. For apoplexy, raise the head and body; for fainting, lay the person flat. If an artery is cut, compress above the wound; if a vein is cut, compress below. For slight burns dip the part in cold water; if the skin is destroyed, cover with varnish. Remove matter from the ear with tepid water; never put a hard instrument into the .ear. In case of poisoning, excite vomiting by tickling the throat or by warm water and mustard. For dust in the eyes, avoid rubbing; dash water in them. Remove cinders, etc., with the round point of a lead pencil. Suck poisoned wounds, unless your mouth is tore enlarge the wcrand or, better, cut out the part without delay •' hold the wounded part as long as Orel be borne to a hot coal or the end of a cigar. Smother fire with carpet, etc., water will often spread burning oil and increase danger. Before passing through smoke take it full breath and then stoop low, but if car- bonic acid gas is suspected walk erect. The New Western Magaztne illustrates the anomalies of English spelling by a little story beginning as follows: "A right shite little buoy, is son of a kernel, with it rough round his neck, flue up the road as quick as a dear. After a thyme he stopped at a house and wrung the belle. His tow hurt him and he krieaded wrest. He Was two tired to rase his fair, pail fade, and a feint MOVell a pain rose from his lips." A. RIN10,11 BANANA,. -- IOW it ItelPed iDlinkers to Caton Ills Blinkers is otie of the luckiest men that was ever created. He ntuat have been born with a silver spoon in his mouth and a golden bowl of bread and milk right at his elbow. Everything eeems to come hie way. If he were to go into the geese -raising bud - Mee right in the middle of the Sahara desert it wouldn't be ten deys till a fine lake would surround his lime. All he has to do is to that himself anywhere on is milking stool and a cow immediately hunts him up. If 131inkers should take out an accident insurance policy for only 38 minutehe would be sure to secure the full amount of it in that time. A few years ago he was about to lose his propertybecauee of a mort- gage there was on it, when he was run down by a street car, and in is suit for dam- ages got money enough to pay off the mort- gage and buy another lot adjoining. Last year a druggist sold him poison by mistake, but he recovered in it short time and got $3,000 damages. Then lae fell on a defect:we sidewalk and got $1,000 more. Just this spring his house burned, and he got insur- ance money enough to build. a new modern home he was contemplating. All Blinkers has to do is to turn 'his goblet up and the gods fill it with wine. Yeater- day he started out of town for a vacation trip. He was late in starting for the train, and he tried to catch. a street car, but missed it, and, while waiting for another, a man came along who had been trying for weeks to dodge him and wad him a bill of $50, The car he missed was run into by a freight train, and is lot of folks were in- jured. But he was sure he could not catch his train. Hovever, he ran like everything, and reached the top of a, l�nIg flight of steps that lead down to thet&ifto shed just as the train was starting. "If were only at the bottotn of the ritiireO", thought he, "1 might yet catch the train." Right on the top of the step lay it banana" peeling, on which he hastily set hiti fopt: The binaatut peeling did the rest, laniding him at the bottom in time to natal obis , train all right. But he is the only man in the work44i, whom a banana peeling would do IS friendly Wm.—Chicago Times. To the Poorhouse. The county house waggon drew. op at the' old farm -house door in the early mo,424114 light, and the poor overseer got out; ;Mid knocked on the door with the bitttelid of his whip. "Hey," quavered a thhitnicace within, "who's there ?" " We'ectiiie for ye', mother," said the overseerwit"Who calls me 'mother'?" asked thketroarinlous voice, and then the door was ,dienekley it shaky hand, and an old woman, edicased in shawl and hood, stood in the dorzrafkra "1 'member," she said slowly, noddihred toward the waggon, "it's the select -Mena an' I srpose they know best, but #',Aixo`i, knew— if—Jim knew—that his poor',-,swether was goin' to the poorhouse it aids"liOak his heart." " Ar' ye' ready OS s'inether ?" asked the man, gently. "areSVI be. I ain't slept sence I heerd ye 1:Vereetamin' for for. It's all right, an' I elafiV4laine ye, but it's hard to hey workedr43* life an' raised a family, an' then ' dieemathe poor- house. It'll a -most kilt 'eltimta When he knows." The man on the tite4rstiip coughed and turned away, pretencling:!,* examine the wisteria vine that blOSSotried, over the door. Not for worlds wineld''Iiet have told her that he was carrying Otet7aIiin's orders against the time he should awing his wife to the old farmhouse. She 'esainst.;out, slowly looking with vague, weiidering eyes at all she was leaving ; the trees islasi and Harvey —that was her —Vid when they were young, at tl*.bed,. sof cinnamon pinks and the lilac :;Inishes at the gate. She stopped and, Slathered some of the fragrant sOutlieen ' wood—" old man," they called it --an ct then she looked up at the window of one 'roora—bridehood, wifehood, motherhoed;';',ingelhood, that meant to her. LittlerWearrie had died there, Harvey hadeleielted his last in the heaven of her eyes there. That was nigh on forty years ago. Why, where was God this fair summer morning that He had for- goten her, and let her go to the poorhouse? • Hurry up mother," said the man gently, " we're to call for another paup—passenger a bit further down the road. 'Taint much your adeavin"—with a short laugh. He was trying to make the best of it for her. He helped her into the waggon, and in the golden light of another new day they moved on, jogging along the country road, sweet with the scented life of nature, until they reached the stile that led into the old graveyard where the sentinel stones shone among the trees in their strange dumb weakness. Oh, ef you didn't mind—if I just could say a word to Harvey—it would help me so much, an' I wouldn't be long—I wouldn't keep you waitina" "Alt right, mother." The overseer jumped out and helped her to the ground. "Don't be bong; there's a good soul," and he lit his pipe and talked to the driver, apologizing for his weakness. "'Taint like as if she were it common pauper," he said; "there are folks here as remember when she was the belle of the county, and they do say it is this son Jim that has run through with the property an' is gettin' her out of Otto way so he won't have to pay for her keep. I wouldn't tell her for a house and lot. "She wouldn't believe yer if yer did," said the driver sententiously, "but she's taking her time in yonder." No. It was not thne she was taking, but eternity. When the overseer went th look for her, she lay with her withered cheek pressed to the moss -grown stone that bore the name of her husband, and a smile that seemed to be a reflected glory from Paradise lit up her peaceful face. It had come to her in one brief moment, the assurance that she would not go to the poorhouse, and then—she had gone home. Toilet Hints. Lanoline is one of the best skin softeners; in ite crude state it was known to the an- cient Egyptians, and Cleopatra, who was an adept in the arts of toilet, is said to have anointed her face with an unguent made of lanoline or sheep's wool fat, tlie fat nearest the skin being used for this purpose. A quart of milk in which the juice of three mandarin oranges have been squeezed issaid to be a refreshing lotion for the complexion. Eating quentitiee of oranges is an extol - lent remedy for c'earing it muddy skin ; be- fore breakfast is the best time, and one may indulge in as many as is agreeable. Why. Indeed? "Why does a dog run sidewise or diagon- ally ?" inquired the purchaser of a fine black Newfoundland pup of it dog fancier the other day. "Well, sir, that's a ques- tion I've been asked frequently, and, after some investigation, I have concluded the reason is that the animal hes been brought op that way. Why deo a chicken roost on one foot or an owl keep its eyes wide open all night long, or a rooster trow vigorously at the break of early dawn, or a pig run homeward with straws in its mouth before approaching rain ? Thetas are questions that are ea difficult to solve as sonie of the astronomical problems." — Plailaolelphist Press. i.Patents have lived exclusively on beef and neaten for from throe to four years. BEHEADED IN SECRET. 0 N this 70b of may, 1777,thePublie executioner of Colmar was inaPrit' Boned for having left the town without permission ef the authori- ties. He was several times brought up before the authorities, and, here is the account he gave of his ab- sence : Re said that one evening at the end of April he was alone in his house—his wife a,ud assistants being out—occupied in some duty of his office, Alleh as repealing hang'. cuffs or putting a gibbet together, when he heard a loud knack at the door, He opened the door, expecting some mos - merger from the magistrates, no other per- son ever visiting his condemned dwelling ; instead he saw three men enveloped in cloaks, while a carriage elowly advanced, surrounded by six or seven other muffled mon. He thought they were messengers from some neighboring tribunal and drew back to let them enter the house. ' But the men sprang upon him, gagged him, bound him hand and foot and placed him in the carriage. The three men he had first seen also got in, while the others mounted horses, and then all set off at full speed. They preserved it profound silence while they were passing through the town, but soon one touched the executioner on the arm, and said : "Listen to me. You have nothing to fear ; you are only required to perform an act of justice, and we will answer for your safety, provided that you do not attempt to escape or try to penetrate a mystery with which it is not necessary that you should be fully acquainted. When your task is completed you shall he brought back to your home and re- • ceive 200 louis as compensation for your trouble.going to remove your bonds and ' ,gag,,ath ,,I, me voice continued, ' and you will no longer be subjected to any personal re- straint except a bandage, which will be placed over your eyes during the day and removed at night ; but this is only on con- dition that you are perfectly obedient and do not speak. At the first cry you utter you are a dead man." As soon as his mouth was free and he had permission to speak, with it thousand oaths he swore to abide by all their conditions. They often changed horses, but always in retired places, where they always seemed to be expected. On the evening of the second day the carriage stopped. He heard a drawbridge descend, and soon they entered a court- yard. It then seemed to him that he entered a large vestibule, then crossed several vast dark rooms, which he was certain were all vaulted, 8,nd at last was led into a huge saloon, where the bandages were taxenfrom hiswalls were hung with black and a TehyeeEh few torches cast a dim, sepulchral light over the apartment. In the dim recesses of the room he discovered ten men seated in magisterial robes, while near him were many others, all masked with crape upon their faces. Immediately after the executioner had en- tered this seeming hall of judgment a door in the opposite wall was thrown open and two men appeared leading a lady, whose face was concealed by a long veil. Calm and motionless, with folded arms, she stood in the centre of the hall. At length one of the men in robes arose and addressed the executioner in Ger- man, as follows : "'Von have been brought here to inflict in se ret the merited punishment of a secret crime. You will behead this woman who, though not answerable to a public tribunal, is staiaed with unpardonable guilt." The executioner was an honest man; he would unhesitatingly put to death people condemned, by the magistrates of Colman under their mandate signed and sealed; but this was quite another affair—nothing better than an assassination. After a few moments' reflection he summoned sufficient courage to say with unhesitating voice: "1 cannot obey you. When I promised it was under the impression that your pro- ceedings would be legal, though secret. I am not an assassin. I will not touch one hair of that woman's head. Besides, what crime has she committed V' " You ask what crime this woman has committed? Listen and you shall hear, and Otto horror of the tale will nerve your arm to inflict on her a puniehment which is, however, unequal to her guilt. This woman —" "Enough," said the lady, stretching out her hand. "You may deprive me of life ; but you may not, ought not, to reveal to a man like that the secret your ears have heard. It I am guilty, pnnish me. I submit." "Listen," said the first speaker. " Do you value your life? If you have not be- headed this woman before the quarter strikes I will send it bullet througa your head,e" Every stroke of the pendulum was agony to the poor man, who in a few minutes would be called upon tO2decide between guilt or death. The executioner began to pray. At the conclusion of his prayer he cried out : " Kill me if you will, I will not obey." " You have 10 minutes still," coolly re- plied the judge. The quarter struck. At a signal from the President the assistants advanced towards the executioner and again presented the sword to him. He shook his head and pushed it aside with his hand. The president cocked his pistol; the wretched man did not know what to do. " Merciful heaven 1" thought he, "must I leave my wife •a widow, my child an orphan 1" Whether it was this thought that influ- enced him or that his power of resistance shrank before the arm outstretched against his life I know not, but he cried in is stifled voice : " I coOlikOttosel Hetsword, and, having tried its edge, stepped forward. Excited either by fear or that intoxica- tion ,which sometimes influences people in times of imminent clanger, he raised the sword, and at one blow severed the bead ; and than he, the man of iron nerves, who during twenty years had been shedding human blood as the minister of human justice, sank fainting to the ground beside Otto victien he had eacrificed. Their journey back was performed with the same precautions as before, and on the fourth day he was set free on the banks of the Ille in a meadow near his house. He found his wife very anxious and the magis. trates furious. All that I have written is copied almost exactly frona his depositions, which I read in Strasburg at the residence of the Lieuten- ant -General, who gave me permission to transeribe them. The magistrates of Colmar made every exertion to discover the persons concerned in thial melancholy history, but in vain. — BostogiGeobe. A voids is a man who wmild starve were it not for hisfriends who are not geniuses. COOKS, GALLS, SORB StiOULDISItS, SCRATCHES, Ur unY WOUNDS on OISEi os C.A'VP'17I..P,`,, Quickly Denied. f3peedy Cure GUAIRA/WEED ia you Ilse eient by MidI on receipt of Price 25 Cent's, 1.347 O.. V. $13.10s$WORTM TOROICTO, CAN. AGENTS Wa,xitcet 11 very ivhor 0. l'ESTIfiXONIALS. Will HE WILISELES. Ilow Alonzo Stubbs Got Seven Iliarriage able Daughters 015 Ills nand. Many a man fails to aot simply because nothing suggests the right thing at the right time. Alonzo Stubbs was a poor, but worthy man, with seven grown-up daughters. He tried to dress them well, butt despite the fact that they made over their dresses and retrimmed their hats, he felt that he could, without any special sacrifice on his part, spare a few of them au wives for promising but seemingly hesi- tating young men. One time Alonzo slaw an advertising clock that presented it new placard to the observer every five minutes. It struck Alonzo with it forcible suggestive - nese. He bought one, and on the next Sunday evening had it placed against the parlor wall, opposite to the place where the sofa stood. Reginald was just seating him- self beside Rexene when a tiny. bell rang, and the following tiashed into QUM : Let those love now who never loved before, And those who always loved now love the • more. The young people laughed at the happy arrangement which the father's mind had devised, and drew nearer together. Pre- aently the bell rang again, and "Gas bills are getting higher"met their gaze. They tried to laugh again'bat it was almost a failure. However, they looked into each other's eyes with it seriousness they had never exhibited before. The next placard pleased them znuch more. It read as fol- lows : A sorrow shared is a half a trouble. But a joy that's shared is a joy made double. Here the bashful young man took her hand in his, something he had often wished to do, but, until then, had never mustered up sufficient courage to undertake. The next motto that came into view was less poetic, but more to the point: " Long Courtships Cost Money and are a Great Waste of Time." Had some one been list- ening at the door a moment later he would have heard a noise that sounded very much like the parting of something clinging. It might have been a kiss. Again the bell rang, and the following appeared; Let us then be up and doing, With a heart for any fate; Let's have done with endless wooing And propose or emigrate. In five minutes more the pledge had been made, and Rexene led her accepted lover frem the room to make way for her next younger sister and beau. At the end of two weeks the seven daughters were all engaged. Mr. Stubbs told his secret to a neighbor with a number of girls, to whom he sold the clock for $4 more than it cost him. And the man, whose face once wore an 'ultramarine expression, now goes whistling to and from his work. As a cure for paralysis, sciatica, rheum. atism, female troubles such as suppressions, bearing down pains, etc., general debility and that tired feeling peculiar to so many, Dr. Williams' Pink Pills stand unrivalled. Beware of imitations and substitutes. Sold by all dealers or sent by mail post paid, on receipt of price -50 cents a box—The Dr. Williams' Med. Co., Brockville, Ont. Tim Indians and the Elevator. Grim old Chief Standing Bear of the Sioux, Black Eagle, Lost Horse and several other wild Indians, composing it delegation from the plains, were in San Francisco a short time since. When they made their first trip in a 10,story elevator they thought the building WaS on an upward flight th Otto happy bunting grounds, and they com- menced a ghost -dance with weird songs and wild war -whoops. When they were about half -way up they gasped with terrible con- tortions and placed their hands upon their belts. The elevates. boy was so frightened at the actions of the Indians that he bolted from the cage at the upper floor and started to run down stairs with Black Eagle a,nd the eest after him. They thought that was the proper thing to do and did not realize that the boy was frightened out of his wits. The Indians, unused to stairs, fell in a heap and the boy escaped. It took an interpre- ter half a day to explain the situation to the Indians and induce them to put away their tomahawks. FITS.—All Fits stopped tree by Dr. Mined Great Nerve Restorer. No Fits after first day's use. Marvellous cures. Treatise and S.2.00 trial bottle free to Fit cases. Send to Dr. Kline, 931 Arch St., Philo.delphia, Pa, The Princess of Egypt is the only native lady of Cairo who dares to go about un- veiled, to give dinner parties and entertain- ments admitting male foreigners, and at which she appears arrayed in magnificent decollate dresses of Parisian make. Having an independent fortune of her own she en- joys herself in her own way. " Bessie," said the young man, plead- ingly, " this is the fourth time I have called at your home since I saw you last. Is there any way by which I can always be sure of finding you in, or at least of always knowing where you are when I call for you ?" • You might ringme up, you know," responded the pretty tele- phone girl, looking dreamily at her shapely fingers. Dusty Rhodes—You do wrong to cut it cove like Stryker. What has he done? Fitz William—He used to be connected with laboworganization. Dusty Rhodes—That waant no disgrace; he was only the walking delegate. Mrs. Pennigen—Did you over bet on the races, Mrs. Holdfast? Mrs. H.—Yes. Once when Charley ate two mince pies I bet on a nightmare. GOITRE OR IIG-NECIP If you want that I,,1argcznent on your neck Permanently Cured, en- close a Stamp and Send for Circular and price of medicine to r- Mrs,M.P.IrT,OYD, Bellefontaine,O. PENNYROYAL VJAFERS. A p..ijflo monthly medicine for ladle, Lo restore and romMits the monse.4 pprochwthg Proti, healthy and painless Idigonarge. No isilies or pains on ap preach. Nois need bY over 30.000 ladle% / One° used, will use Again. Insicosises thse e°ma Buyinof year druggist only those Witli mit sienatiuss aestiao rase of label. Avoid subeittntell. Make partiaulars mailed Se stamp. I.00 bon Addrels, EUREKA o tIOUPARY. tenstOix. VisO's lOL,451 tor is 1110 Beet, Easiest to U80, rind Cheapest. AMOY ISSUE. NO 31. 1892. NOTE lit replying to taw of Owes Advertisments kindly mention this paper , AA. Ri3griV177e 4Y4104.'%' 7701,13TO ti''2iibd°71tEP4,70STa: BI.00D BUILD'S -1;c SUATir AT°01Ou'edifouthoo°41. rn fat cleolrti seyheeran3 sleoesesouddbe :dto :tun aol :Iona eti.. from Point and W'O- ity or from VITIS,TOD HUMORS its the weoon, e,nd obits invigorate and BUILD up dm Drool) flild SYSTIQA, when broken. adertal 1Dr7orroy,isevderwoara ls* n : excesses and indiscre- tions. They have e SPOOSPic ACTION Oo: SY0TZU.• t401). 41 men aud wouren, sturiai, 1,0111 VrOOlik r• itilt)rt,ItotcrIO:rritefortrain,2g 1,eni V.T1,12111]85IONS, EVERY 13ANnL',it's 0111 ,O, fitiliisi or his physical powers ilaggihuigs, coilftneiriesdortaglist, 1,,l:oettitqk Pir,rr ,s. They will esteie physical SItI nikita'enrl'alf/A. seould take tncrn. 411.0/l1a ,CL:,•y cure all tnip- pressions arid ,Tugularitics, which inevitably entail sicknes 41i en oegisctsd. sults of youthful badbits', and strengthen the YOUNG M,FNrIl euro the ro» system. YU111°411d le1ehe4r'f make the regular. For sale byall druggists, or will be sent upon receipt of price (50c. per box), by addressing ZisrE DR. WILDILAIII,SA .1117gD. 00. Brooke/A& OS& CENTS ?a,"rv gre PITOfitttr JOURNAL one year. Best Stories and other reading for old and young. Regular price 50c. per year, but to introduce, we will send one year on trial for only one dime and also insert your name one year in the 'AGENTS' DIRECTORY" which we send all over the United States to firms who wish to mail papers, magazines. pictures, cards, etc., as samples. FREE, with terms. Our patrons receive bushels of mail. Send AT ONCE and You will be WELT, l'I,EASED. T. D. CAMP BELL, X 9T, Boyleston, Ind., U. 8. A. ALBERT : COLLEGE, BeD.Qville, Ont. Leads the colleges—enrollment 220. Larger& number of martioulants of any college_ fit Canada. WILL RE -OPEN TUESDAY, SEPT EMBER 600, '92. For calendar address PRINCIPAL DYER, M. A., B.Sc. Brantford Ladies' College And Conservatory of Music. Reopens September 7th, 11382.. The most largely attended Presbyterian Ladies' College in Ontario, with students from Manitoba, British Columbia, Quebec and the United States. The faculty consists of twenty members, chiefly specialists, affording students superior advantages in Literature, Science, llodern. Languages, Elocution, Pianoforte, Voice Culture, Art, Stenograpb.y and TYPewrite Dig. etc. For new calendar address Rev. Wm. Cochrane, D. D., Governor. ALMA ic.e0;keiegn Vot1mNEGN 60 -page Illustrated Catalogue free. Graduating conrses in. Literature, limit. Fine Arts, Commercial Science, Elocution. Fittest buildings and furnishings e.nd Iowa* rates. Reopens Sept. 1000. PRINCIPAL AUSTIN, A. M., St. Thomas, Ont. A GENTS WANTED -020 A WEE. G. ..tL MARSHALL & CO., Tea Importers London, Ontario. wANTEn 600 Teachers toeanvass. -1-f 9 or one or more of our first-class subscription books. Send for Ulna trate,d catalogue and terms. W I LLAM BRIGGS, rublisiter, TORONTO. DOMINION SILVER COMPANY weSTE HAVE BEEN INFORMED THAT VV certain parties, without proper authority, are using our name and reputation to securer orders for goods of an inferior quality. The Public are notified that all our goods are stamped with our name so that the imposition can be detected at once. We want several more pushing men to act as agents. DOMINION SiLMER COMPANY, Toronto, Ont. 10 Cent Sampie A Lovely Heade painted CUSKIOIS Top. Hand painting done to order. Send your own material or we supply material and designs. Stamp - 'ng for painting or embroidery d o n e. -Country trade especL ally solicited. Fancy work supplies of all kinds —Address— "FUJI LADLES ART SUPPLY CO.," Toronto, Out, CHEAPFARMSINVIRGINIA MILD CLIMATE, GOOD MARKETS And good land from 86 to 820 PER ACRE with improvements. Send for our circular. PYLE Sc DkHAVEN, Petersburg, 1ML0RIDA'S .ADVANTAGES FOR SMALL Ainvestments. See Florida Real Beattie journal. Arcadia, Fla. Sample and map 10e. silver MICHIGAN LANDS F011 SALL, 121000 Of good Farming Lands,fille perfect & .„.,„. on Michigan Central, Detroit) .41 Acres puts, and Loon Lake Raihca434 itt prices ranging from 4.2 to 15l5 per acre4 lands are close to enterprising new !meek churches, wheels, etc., and will be sold en Mae favorable terms. Apply to R. M. PIERCE, Weeb Bay City. • Or to J. NV. CURTIS, Whilitemere, Mich Please nuntileto this paper when writing Ine Montana Mining, Loan likresiment en (,,kommo..m..tmqt.t. IJUs Va. \»tttt9i SAO.O.NM9t..11 PAW UP CAPITAL, ei gt000,000 (inns money anywhere intim united States* Canada or Mexico, with() it security. tiyou 11,ee12 money, apply to i.,os.lAgents or write to t4EWOV 0. HAUPT, President, Burst CtrV, Sell hy druggists or tent by mall. Oo.It T. natortioe. Wari•ett. Pa Agents Werited uvetywher),