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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Exeter Advocate, 1892-7-14, Page 3"Laugh a tittle eltt." Here's a motto, just your fit "Laugh it little bit," yVlien you think you're trouble -hit "Laugh a little bit." Look misfortune in the face, Brave the beidam's rude griinttee; Ten to one 'twill yield its place If you have the grit ad wit Just to laugh a little bit. ICoop your face with sunshine lit— " Langh it little bit." Gloomy shadows off will flit If you have the wit and grit Jut to laugh a little bit. Cherish this e.ssaer9d Writ "Luh a little bit.' Keep it with you, sample it— " Laugh a little bit.' Little ills will sure betide you, Fortune may not sit beside you, Men may mock and Fame deride you But you'll mind them not a whit If you laugh a little bit. PLANS THAT WENT AMISS. Janet's Idatoh-Makinn, Which Waa Not a SuoceSe for Her. NE soft, warm June day two young ladies were sitting on the long, vine -embowered veranda, of an old-fashioned farm -house. One was a plump, well-rounded brunette, whose fingers were busy with some fancy work ; the other, a tall, fair beauty, who lolled idly in her seat, now and then making a bare pretence of reading. For an hour neither had spoken but at last the brunette, having finished her work, held it up to view, saying: "There, Janet, what do you think of my taste ?" "Ob, dear, Lou," replied Janet, with a yawn, "how horridly tiresome you are. Why Will you persist in working when you know how vulgar it ie? What's the use of being rich if we are not to act like ladies ? " "1 am sure, Janet," Lou answered, de- murely, "there can be no harm in such trifling employment, and it is a great pleasure to me." " Oh, I dare say," Janet cried, petu- lantly, "1 suppose there would be no harm in your going into the fields to help with the harvests. I do wish you would not insist on, bringing your disgrace to me, even if you have no care for yourself." "1 do not see where there is any dis- grace in work, Janet." "1 suppose it is not a disgrace to have once earned our own living, and I presume thore is no harm in proclaiming that fact to the world," Janet replied sarcastically. "No, I am sure we did not think honest work disgraceful when we were:compelled to labor and I do not think so now." "What will society say, Lou ?" "1 do not know, nor do 1 care." "1 believe you, and I aelieve, too, that you have no care for wile.; Robert Barton may think." "1 haven't Janet. If seciety or Robert Barton think it a. disgraue to have earned one's living in preference e, begging, steal- ing or starving I have no ) e meet for their opinions and they are welcome to think of me as they please." "Lou," said Janet, after a short pause, "if you have no care for yourself, I wish you would have a little for me. Robert will be here to -day, and you know what a great catch he is. I have made up my mind to win him and I will if you don't shock him with your rude ways. So, Lou, for my sake, act like a lady. Do not dis- grace me before Robert Barton." " Well, sister, for you're sake I'll try and not shock the sensitive Mr. Barton. itis impossible, though, for me to be otherwise than natural and as I can't pre. tend to be a lady when I am not, the safest way is to keep myself out of Mr. Barton's sight- So, as he will be here soon, I'll take myself to the woods." Janet sighed hopelessly and closed her eyes as if worried beyond forbearance. Ah 1 Lou, Lou 1" she cried at last, "what am I ever to do with you? It will kill me to see you married to some common man, a farmer or a laborer, but with euch horrid taste as you have team expectnothing better. Oh, dear !" " Don't worry, Janet. J. shall not marry at present, and when I do I shall marry the man I love. He may be a farmer, but whatever he is I'll warrant him to be a good man, for I shall never love any other kind." Lou went down across a wooded meadow, and, coming to a rustic bridge, sat down. "Ah," she sighed, "1 do BO wish Janet was not so changed. I am half sorry we are not still poor, for I hate affectation, and I know I shall never succeed in being any- thing but a plain, matter-of-fact goose. I can't be a lady and affect grand airs, and there's no use in trying." Atter a long pause she resumed " Rob- ert Barton will come, and when he sees Janet he will like her, and after awhile they will marry. What a fine wife he will make, too, and what a grand lady ! She is just the sort of a person, with her calm self-possession and her stately dig- nity, to do honor to a fine old mansion like Oakview. Ah, dear old Oakview, how I love you already, because you are lso solid and unpretentious. I hope Janet and Robert Barton will be happy." Janet and Lou Harding had been left parentless and poor, and through the care of a kind but poor old uncle they se- cured work in a dressmaker's shop, which they gladly accepted and retained, and whereby they had been able to earn a •scanty support for themselves. After three years of this hard, poorly remunerated labor, their benefnctor brought ;them news one day of some good fortune -that had befallen them. A rich uncle had ,clied in Mexico, leaving his entire fortune to his sister's children, and through the '.efforts that , had been made to find the two orphans, a foster sister of their father had • been discovered in the northern part of the :State, and already she had sent a letter instructing the two girls to come at once and make their home with her. "How grandly- fortunate," Janet had oried when the good tidings were made ,known to them. It's good-bye once and 'for all to that miserable little shop, and as ,soon as we can get a few decent things to- gether we shall take the train for good old Aunt Barton'a." "But what is to become of dear old eUncle Dunkin 7" Lou asked, "Oh, I don't know, Pra sure. He care •not expect ua to chain ourselvett down here to this life just for his sake." Perhaps not, Janet, but I shall not -leave him after all heels done for us." "Well, yeti can do as you like; Lou ; as for me, I'm going at once." But there was no need of any worrying •over Uncle Dunkin, for the very neXt day he was found drowned in the river, and the girls left the city within a week and were whirled away to the North, through the great, open country, sio full of freedom and beaaty, dotted here and there with clean, aunny villages, and within a few hours were safely lodged at Mrs. • Barton's dear old home—picturesque Oakview. Once during the journey Lou had turned to her sister, and with her voice so soft and 'trembling, said: "Janet, how 1 wish gootl old Uncle Dun - lived to esie this. 1 ehOuld have enjoyed it more if he could have been "I'm thakfu he isn't, Lou. He was Well enough in our old life, but he wouldn't do now." From the date of that speech Lou had felt a pang of sorrbw Unit was new to her, and as she sat in the shade of the elm tree flown by the bride the ohmage in her sieter came back to her and she sighed. Robert Barton woe Mrs. Barton's only child, a youpg man oi 22, who had been abroad for a year end was -xpected home that evening, The carriage had already been sent to the station to meet him, and Janet, having made up her mind to ensnitre and capture him and become the mistress of Oaltview, had been practising the art of luxurious leisure from the day of her ar- rival. Lou had remained by the bridge almost an hour when she saw the carriage rolling along the lane, and she watched it until it rolled up to the gate and disappeared among the ereea that lined the drive. So intent was her gaze and so absorbed her thoughts that she started with a little cry of alarm yawn she was suddenly awakened by the sound of footsteps on the bridge close behind bee. "Beg pardon," said a dusty, travel. stained man with a tanned face, as he lifted his hat. I am sorry that I frightened you. I used to like this walk, and especially at this time of day, since it is so quiet and restful, and then the clover scents always bring back the days of my childhood, and when we reached the turn over there I left the carriage to walk acress to the house." "Then you are Mr. Barton ?" Lou said. "Yes, excuse me. I should have intro- duced myself. But when one has been away so long and is getting home again he feels wild with pleasurable excitement. You, I presume, are Miss Harding ?" "1 am Lou Yarding." "Oh, indeed ! Well, I am anxious to meet dear mother, so if you are going to the house we will walk baok together.' But little was said by either of them as they went back acmes the sward, but Lou was consciouu more than once of the hand- some manes eyes being fixed, intently on her. When they reached the house Janet affected a manner so cold and distant and so listless that Lou looked at her in surprise. That night when the sisters promen] aded arm in arm across the lawn Janet asked: "Lou, what do you think of Robert?" "1 do not know that I ought to express an opinion," Lou replied, "since I know so little about him." "Don't you think he is handsome 7" " Well, no ; not handsome, but well enough looking." " I hope you like him Lou, for I mean that he shall be your brother. Do you think you will like him for a brotner ?" "1 shall like him for your sake, Janet," Lou answered. "Thank you sister. Now, since you are such a dutiful little dumpling I'm going to tell you something. I've got it all planned out how we are to manage when Robert and I are married and I am mistress of Oakview. You are to live with us, of course, and I know Robert won't object. And as for the old house, I'm going to have it overhauled and modernized so that it will be respecta- ble. And as for aunt and her traps, they shall be packed off to some obscure room out of the way. Ah, I'm going to have a thorough renovation, and society will find Oakview charmingly fashionable. Don't you like that ?" "No, I don't like it, andet I was Mr.Bar- ton I'd. never consent to have the old house changed. It is so dear in its old-fashioned simplicity, and besides, I know good old aunt would not like any changes. It ought to be left as it is." You little goose, when will you ever begin to learn anything? • What do I care for what aunt likes, and who cares for sim- plicity? Don't I tell you we are in society and must lay aside old-fashioned nonsense ?I do hope,Lou,you won't mortify Inc with any of your absurd manners and speeches when Robert is present, for if you do I believe I shall die," Janet printed a light kiss on her sister's brow and tripped away. Lou continued walking slowly to and iro and her face had the marks of a deep sorrow. "11 that is to become the outcome of our riches," she mused, "it would have been better for us to have remained poor forever." Through the succeeding days Lou kept away from Robert Barton as much as possible. She slipped out alone for long rambles in the fields, or shut herself up in her room, thus leaving Janet free to enjoy Robert's company undisturbed. Yet Lou was not happy. Unconsciously she had learned to love Robert herself, and as earnestly as she tried to place him out of her heart she could not. One night, when a month had passed, he walked alone on the lawn. There was a sad yearning in her soul and a sigh escaped her. The next moment her hand was imprisoned in a strong but tender grasp, and looking up with a little cry she saw Robert Barton bending over her. "Lou," he said, "why are you so un- happy ! " She did not speak, but her hand trembled and her eyes were cast down. "Lou,"he continued, "1, too, am un- happy, "and often of late I have sighed. Can't you, won't you, guess the cause of my unhappiness 2" "1 cannot," she murmured. "Then I must tell you," he said. "It is because you avoid me. Lou, I love you, and I manna be happy without you. Won't you try to learn to love me." " I cannot," she whispered. "1 have already learned." He threw his arms about her and drew her to him. "My precious jewel," he cried. "My true child of nature 1 I am the most for- tunate of men in winning you, for you are capable of love and feeling, and you will make me happy always." And it was so. — Chicago Evening News. None but the Brave, Etc. He was poor, but nervy, and she was beautied and rich. Will you marry me?" he asked, plumply. "Why," she exclaimed, "how abrupt you are 1 You woia't give me time." " I can't do it," he snapped. "This is a cash transaction." And so they were married and lived hap- pily to a good old age. Hutto Ready. Ethel—Old Moe Matchmaker has found a husband for Miss Frostiqum Maud—I suppose Miss Frostique asked a lob of questions when she wail told of it? Ethel—No. She simply said, "Is it a man 7" and when he was told it was, she said, "Let hitn bring°. preacher along with The looking-foraegamleak-withalighted mateh idea ia winning a record among the didn't -know -it -was -loaded and starting -the fire -with -kerosene echemea. Did you ever really know a wonian too busy to tun to the peeler 'window t� look at a neighbor with a new hat? THEIR TIMEJ IS UP, No More Fake Inetwanee Sehemee in Ozttario, TIME FOR REGISTRATION EXPIRED, Toronto News The members of the local endowment and insurance moieties had a great hustle on during the pest week trying to get their affairs in shape for registration, The time for filling applications for registry under the new 'Insurance Corporationa Act" ended at midnight preceding Dominion Day, and any society or company doing business in the insurance linein the Province which had not mailed its application before the commencement of Dominion Day, will be debarred from doing business, as there is no provieion made whereby applimations can be received, at a later date. The work of sifting out unreliable societies and companies will now be commenced in earnest in the Provincial Insurance Depart- ment. It will be sometime before the stand- ing of all societies and companies can be investigated, but as soon as the list is com- pleted the names of the acceptable ones will be published in the Ontario Gazette, and no other company or society will henceforth be allowed to do business in Ontario, whether incorporated or not. It us admitted that nearly all the com- panies will be successful in obtaining regia- tration, but the members of the society and benefit organizations may wait with fear and trembling. The societies are legion and many of them poorly constituted and in procesa of decay. Most ef them have had canyamers abroad for some weeks past drumming up lethargic members and getting records and rides in good shape for the scrutiny of Dr. J. How- ard Hunter, the inspector. Many of the loc,a1 branches of wild cat American socie- ties have not attempteci to do anything to- ward registering and will quietly drop out. " Our great objecb," sudd Dr. Hunter, "was to put down the speculative and gambling companies and societies which were demoralizing legitimate insurance business. As it was, those illegitimate schemes were drawing away the younger members from the standard systems of in- aurance. "Some seemed to be afraid of inability to stand the test of legitimate orders, and did not apply for registration. The majority of legitimate orders are actively supporting the new legisla tion, though many of them have had great difficulty in getting their facts com- piled. I have to ascertain what legal authority they hold for doing businesa in the Province. This information gleaned from their statements will be published in the form of a report. Lists will be issued each half year giving the public all infor- mation about existing societies ansi compa- nies, and anyone will be in a position to ascertain the standing of any corporation in the insurance line. Now, the simple test, will be whether the society or company stands registered in this office. It is simple, but will be a great benefit to the public. The new Act also provides for economical winding up. Prior to this, Provincial in- surance corporations could only he wound up under the Dominion Act, which did not apply to friendly societies." The penalties are heavy. After Decem- ber 31st next any agent or promoter of any concern not registered may be fined $200 and costs and imprisoned a year on a second conviction if he undertakes or offers to do business in this line for such a concern. There will have to be further legislation before any new society or company can do business in the Province as the act makes no provision for any corporation that may come into existence in the future. It only refers to those existing. Too Expressive Words. One is sometimes startled at the discovery of a new ancl most disagreeable force in a single word, when that word is applied to himself to characterize some unpleasant fact of which he has long been aware, aays the St. Louis Chronicle. "Don't call me fleshy 1" said a lady of magnificent proportions; "1 don't object to my size, but I simply can't bear that word! " Another woman has not the least desire to marry, but cannot endure being called a "spinster." Not long ago a pretty woman in the thir- ties announced her intention of taking a somewhat extended trip alone, and ended with the remark: "An old maid like me doesn't need an escort." Then Marjorie, the little maid of the family, burst into a torrent of tears. "You're not an old maid, auntie!" she wailed ; "you're not! I can't bear it!" "But I am, Marjorie," said her aunt, laughing; "why, it's a nice thing to be. I like it." "Oh, but you're not, you're not 1" cried Marjorie, as she rushed off to the study to ask, passionately: "Papa, is auntie an old maid ?" "No, dear," said her father, sooth- ingly, "not at all. She's only a postponed bride." That proved wondrous comforting. The tears were speedily dried, but auntie herself was somewhat electrified when a caller came that afternoon to hear the little girl enquire sweetly and in a tone so innocent that no one could suggest her ceasing to re- peat the remark: "Did you know that Aunt Helen is a postponed bride? Isn't it nice?" A. Hamilton Application for Divorce. An Ottawa despatch says: There are two notices in the Gazette of applications, during the next session of Parliament, for divorce. One is from Martha 13allantyne, of Scarborough township, in the county of York, who seeks divorce from her husband, Wm. Ballantyne, laborer, Hamilton on the ground of adultery and desertion ; the other is from John Francis Schwaller, of Thorold, merchant, who seeks divorce from his wife, Florence Schwaller, of Niagara Fella, on the ground of desertion, adultery and bigamy. Women Read Advertisements, St. Louis Globe -Democrat: It has been my good fortune during my week's stay ab this hotel to be seated at table with three or four bright women. Every one of them cornea down to breakfast with a newspaper in her hands. And what do you suppose she reads first? Why, the advertisements of the big dry goods houses, of course. She dwells and comments on every item of the advertisements with the serious interest that I devote to the market reports, It is always the mane; fault when he be- comes a drunkard. Drink never takes to a men. The man takes to drink. —The Duke of Portland is carrying out his promise to devote his turf winnings to charitable purpokea. He has already dim, tributed over $300,000 of such winninga. Mrs. A.—So George is to be married next month. Is he making a good haat& 11Irs. /1.-1 believe his fiasco la in every way tuited to him. The worneout caover of len old tulle um. broils makes an excellent dustMloth for tine furniture. HIP IfaCKW WHE srturrons, The been Inattnete Of the Married. Ilan tor Mum Are Correct. After the dinner he looked at his wife, who glared back at him, but tor Once he made bold to say to hi a male guest : 1Vey dear fellow, auppose we go out on the roof far a awoke; you know, m these small fiats there are no verandas." When they arrived onthe roof he turned, held ep a warning finger and said: "Shoo 1 Don t give me away, Will you? "Why, what's up now ?" "I'm after information. Will you an - ewer everything without eq,uivocation?" "Go ahead." "Did you notice the bird in the cage 2" I did." "Did it appear happy ?" "It did. It had fresh cuttlefish and fresh wa‘Dter.i'd ‘ you notice that the pet poodle had apparently been given fresh meat, and that there were no papers scattered around the floorl "T"at was about it." "Did you notice that the children lathed on shoes and stockings ?" "They did." "That the hired girl had the soup hot ? " "She did." 'That my wife addressed me as 'my dear Billie'? "She did, three times ; and each times he smiled sweetly." ":And—and that once she said Oh, you dear fibber, you are just too good for anything'?" "She said that, too, and she coyly pulled your whiskers as she did so." "Is it possible?" " It is that 1" "Well, then, I am lost for good. Ex- cuse me, kind sir, while I shed a pearly tear." "On my neck," said the other man, as they embraced in the moonlight. "You understand, old fellow ?" sobbed the first man, as he clung tighter. "1 do that ; yes, of course." "And you won't leave me for a long time ?" "No, never; for I am a married man myself. I know the symptom's which have frightened you. But take my advice, old fellow. It is your only chance now." " In heaven's name, tell me!" "Sneak down stairs, crawl stealthily along the hall, then suddenly burst open your door, bound into the room, whoop like a wild Indian, roar out for your hat and coat, bawl out something about off for the Black Hills and farewell forever; then wildly dash down the fire escape, and join me here on the corner. I will take care of you for the next two weeks." "And in the meantime ?" "In the mea,ntine, dear old chappie, she may have forgotten." Lines About Lamps. To prevent oil from oozing over the top of the burner, turn the wick down afteat he light is out. Rub the wicks, do not cut them. A new wick must be started right. Loose threads must be clipped off to start with; but when once in shape, the necessity for clipping must be very rare. Be sure that no bit of charred wick or burned fly or moth is left in the lower part of the burner. There is danger of these igniting and setting fire to the oil in the reservoir. A clean, unbroken lamp is net dangerous. If If a lamp has been left standing with a little oil in, it should not be lighted until filled and the burner carefully wiped. It is possible that gas may have formed andmade the lamp, as it stands, unsafe if lighted before refilling. When a lamp is first lighted, leave the flame low until the metal of the burner is heated, then turn as high as possible, with- out smoking. This secures a clear, steady flame. To clean burners,boil in water inwhich sal soda has been dissolved. Put one teaspoon- ful to every quart of water. To prevent chimneys from cracking, put them before using into a large pan and cover them with cold water. Bring the water slowly to a boil. Take the pan off of the fire and let the chimneys cool slowly in the water. If the brass catches of a burner are too tight, the chimney will break as it expands with the heat, These catches are easily loosened withont injuring the lamp. Lynch taw Among Rats. In the neighborhood of Burley the other day a gentleman looking over a wall saw a dead hen in the field. Presently a rat ran up, sniffed at the defunct fowl with much satisfaction, and went away in some haste. Tha onlooker, who is a student of natural history, knew what that meant and re- moved the hen from the spot. In a minute or two the rat came back with half a dozen friends, with the evident intention of removing the carcass for future use. Arrived at the spot where the fowl had lain the rat raised a loud squeak of aston- ishment at its absence. In a trice the other eats fell upon him so savagely that they left him dead on the field as a warning not to play practical jokes with his friends. — Leeds ( Eng. ) Evening Post. Time for Action. Mrs. Brown—You'd better hurry to bed, my dear. Little Johnnie—It's early yet, ma. Mrs. Brown—I know it is. But I see your father coming down the street, and I don't think he caught many fish to -day. on. the Other Foot. "The Irish are incapable of self-govern- ment • see how they act in a campaign," say the English. Mr. Stanley, however, is running in England, not Ireland.—New York Herald. The man who always agrees with you may be a pleasant companion, but when you want advice go to someone else. Profeasor Marshal tells us that the oak in a general way req ires to grow from 120 to 200 years before it is fit to cut for large timber. When the clocks tolled twelve strokes last night and the first day of July made its appearance, nearly 150,000 Pittsburg workmen, wbo had toiled almost laces. santly during the past year, were out of employment The scale in force during the past year expired let midnight, and in tit the mills, the proprietors of which had not signed the scale for the ensuing year, work ceased entirely at that time. All was quiet at Homestead and in the city to -day. The r3treets were filled with idle men, but the beat of order prevailed. Hon. A. G. Porter, the American Min - eater at Rome and Lord Vivian, the British Ambassador, 'have handed to Signor nein, the Italian Prime Minister, a request frem their respectiVe Governments, that King Humbert appoint an arbitrator to take part n the settlement of the controVeray be- tween the United States mad Greats Britain regarding the Behring Sea. "Ma Yes darn1" "Mr. Le Beata asked the if 1 loved him alit night." " Yea? Yes/ Go on, darling." "Wel , 1 wouldn't tell him. at Aret, bub he squeezed it mitt of the in theelld." AzT. COIllen, GALLS, le OBE SIEUPULDERS, SCRATCHES, or any WOUNDS on ITOR42.*3 or C-A-T"rX.,,E: QuiaisIT neuled, eseseny Otero ealleARANI'Elille It you use friMXL.214...i; ITAX-eff^13-l- gient by Mall on receipt or Vriou ,2,5 Ciente, Ily C. Jr, SEGSWOittenfle TORONTO, CAN. AOENTS Wanted Every where. TESTIMONIALS. WON THE CHICKEN. It Punted the 'Loser to Recollect Cite Op. posing Stake. Two years ago a Chicago drummer stopped at Decatur, Alt, said while sitting on the broad hotel, piezza talking with the pro- prietoe of the hostelry noticed a fine fight- ing cook strutting about the street. "Pretty fine bird," remarked the Chicagoan, sententiously. "Yep," replied the hotel keeper, "beat in these parts I reckon." " I'm something of a chicken fancier myself," continued the drummer. So ? Glad to know it sah." "Tell you what I'll do—I'll play you a mane of seven-up for that rooster," remarked the Chicagoan. "Do it with pleasure sah," replied the host. The cards were produced and the drum- mer won. The rooster was turned over to him and was brought to the world's fair city. A few days lige the Chicagoan again reg- istered at the mime hotel in Decatur. The proprietor immediately recognized him. Aren't you the man who played me a game of cards two years ago for a rooster ?" he asked. " Yes, air." " Wall, I've been thinking of you, sah, quite a powerful lot since that time. Do you know, sale I've never been able to re- member What you stakedagainut my rooster, sah, on that occasion. That was the first real Yankee trick I ever experimented with, sah, and you will oblige me now by nomi- nating the sort of poison you prefer."— Chicago Mail, Gratifying To All. The high position attained and the universal acceptance and approval of the pleasant liquid fruit remedy, Syrup of Figs, as the most excellent laxative known, illustrate the value of the qualities on which its success is based and are abundantly gratifying to the Califon/dm Fig Syrup Com- pany. Advertisements Are News. The man who skips the advertisements in perusing a newspaper is certain to miss a valuable amount of news. No part of a newspaper contains more accurate inform- ation as to the condition of the people than the columns devoted to advertising. Here is to be found the best instruction as to the practice of economy in living as well as the most reliable data of the condition of trade. Advertisers are the shrewdest and keenest people, and the matter they furnish is always fresh and entertaining. Read the advertisements, not only to supply your wants to the beat advantage, but read as well to learn what is the news in the great business world, which is the foundation of our existence. FITS.—All Fite stopped free by Dr. Kline's Great Nerve Restorer. No Fits atter first day's use. Marvellous cures. Treatise an482.00 trial bottle free to Fit cases. Send to Dr. Kline, 031 Arch St., Philadelphia, Pa. Afterward. Prudent Mether—I trust. my dear, that you do not encourage young men in their attentions. Daughter --Oh, dear me, no! I threaten to tell you every time any one of them kisses me. Little Johnny on Managing Girls. I like girls. Some boys d nt, but that's because they doesn't know how o manage 'em. Girls gets tired of v ything co quick that all you got to do is to et 'em have their own way 'till they gets d of it an' then you can boss 'em all the rea of the day. I guess womens is the same way. 'T.Vinit Makes a Prohibitionist ? One of the lofty lights of the Prohibition party says: "A man may drink nothing but whiskey and still be a Prohibitionist." Precisely so. It is not bis own habits, but his intense desire to regulate the habits of his neighbors that, fixes a man's standing as a reformer. —Chicago Tribune. As a euro for paralysis, sciatica, rehum- ittism, female troubles euch as suppreesions, bearing down pains, etc., general debility and that tired feeling peculiar to many, Dr. Williams' Pink Pills stand unrivalled. Beware of imitations and substitutes. Sold by all dealers or sent by mail post paid on receipt of price -50 cents is box—The Dr. Williams' Med. Co., Brockville, Ont. The Retort Courteous. Tramp (to Salem Girl)—Can't you give me a cup of coffee? Salem Gini—No; I have only cups of china. I can give you some coffee in a cup, however. Tramp— Thanks, miss. And please be kind enough to drop a cubo of sugar into the receptacle, with a spoonful of bovine juice. Considerate. Young Mr. Fiddleba,ck—Is Miss Redbud at home? Servant—She is, sir ; but the minister its talking to her justat present, sir. Fiddleback—Oh, all right. Don't wake her up. —In Buffalo a woman runs the Street Cleaning Bureau; in Kansas a woman is in the fire department; in Vassar a young woman combs hair at 25 cents a head; Louisville lady makes special shopping trips to Paris; another in New York makes fiat -furnishing a business; still another in New Hampshire is president of a street railway company, while Chicago has a woman embalmer. —Canon Farrar indicates his preferencein the almost boundless field of literature by this statement : "If all the books of the world were in a blaze the first twelve which I should snatch out of the flames would be the Bible, the Imitation of Christ by Thomas a Kemple, Homer, 2Eschyhts, Thucydides Tacitua, Virgil, Marcus Aurelius, Dante, Shakespeare, Milton and Wordsworth. Of living writers I would save first the works of Tennyson, Browning and Ruskin." When the Grand Duke Vleelimir, who hi making a militery tour of inspection in Novgorod, arriv 1 se Teherepovebe yester- day the door of the saloon carriage in which he Was riding flew open, and the Grand Duke, who was leening against it, fell heavily on the flagstones of the station platform. He Was rendered unconscious and blood treamed over his face. The doctors who attended him found, besidea the wounds and contusions on hie heed, dislocations of a leg end arm. His injuries evill compel him to remain in bed for some time. A letter in the London Times nays' the woman who threw the gingerbread at Mr, Gladstone, in Cheater, was one of hie natnit ardent admirers, and that she has since the Unfortitnato occurrence been ovemehelteed With grief. ISSUE NO 28. 1892. NOTE. In replying to any of these Advertisments kindly mention MD DaPsir SOOTHING, CLEANSING, HEALING. Instant Relief, Permanent Cure, Failure Impossible. Many so-called diseases aro simply symptoms of Ctitarrh, such as headache, losing sense of smell, foul breath, liewling and spitting, general feeling of debility, ete. If you are troubled with any of these or kindred symptoms, yOu have Catarrh, and should lose la° time j?rocuring a bottle of Nas.kb Baize. Be warned in time, neglected cold in bead results in Catarrh, followed by consumption and death. Sold by ell druggiete, or sent, post paid, on receipt of price 150 cents and 81) by addressing FULFORD & O. Brockville, Ont. THRILLING eteotive Stories, 16 COM piete love stories and 100 Popular Songs. 10c. BARNARD BROS, 36 MoOanl street, Toronto, Ont TO LADIES rievioituriT rats. We pay the highest price for the work and sup- ply the materials. Send stamped envelope for particulars to Ben. Lomond, San Francisco, Cal. WANTED A RELIABLE MAN IN each connty to Tack Up Advertisement Cards. $3 A DAY and EXPENSES to right party. Send stamped envelope for particulars to Ben. Lomond, advertising manager, San Francisco, Cal. 500 Teachers to canvass -WANTED9 for one or more of our first-class subscription books. Send for illus trated catalogue and terme. WILLAM BRIGGS, Publisher, TORONTO. AGENTS. 'LlIRST-CLASS AGENTS WANTED IN 1. every town and district in Canada. Big profits to pushing People. Send stamp for particulars to Dominion Silver Company Toronto, Ont. 10 Cent Sample A Lovely Hand -- painted Cushion. Top. Hand painting done to order. Send your own material or we supply material and designs. Stamp- ing for painting or embroidery d o n e. Country trade especi- ally solicited. Fancy work supplies of all kinds. —Address— "THE LADIES ART SUPPLY CO.," Toronto. Ont. CHEAP FARMS IN VIRGINIA MUM OLIMATR, GOOD MARKETS And good land from 56 to 520 PER ACRE with improvements. Send for our circnlar. PYLE 8c DeHAVEN, Petersburg, Va. TILORIDA'S .ADVANTAGES FOR SMALL investments. See Florida Real Estate JournaL Arcadia, Fla. Sample and map 10c. silver. NOTICE. I will sell your House, Farm, or any other Real Estate, or forfeit $125. Send stamo for reply. ALFRED COLES, Real Estate Agent, 476 Myrtle Ave., Brooklyn, In. Y. MICHIGAN LANDS FOB SALE, trLaalndps,etgoleitplterfterle pena and Loon Lake' Railroads. et A1 2c, Or e0s0 00 Michigan good Fa rmoi ne ng prices ranging from 82 to 85 per acre. Theas lands are close to enterprising new towns, churches, schools, etc., and will be sold on mope favorable terms. Apply to R. M. PIERCE, West Bay Oil y, Or to J. W. CURTIS, Whittemore, Mich Please mention this paper when writing PENNYROYAL WAFERS. A specific monthly medicine for !ache.. to restore and regulate the 111621,0,2 producing free. healthy and pain.P= c Idis barge. No -aches or pains o a5, proach. Now used byover 30,0nel:tidie Once used, wilt uso again. Invigonst.es these organs. Buy of your draggfr. only those with our signature acre5.. face of label. Avoid substitutes. Scala/ particulars mailed 2c stamp. VAS per box. Address, EUREKA CHEMICAL COUPANY. DarnOrr, Manta Tile Montano fflurg, Loan age Investment Go. ("'""-"" "ME. %MIS asNAOHNtstm,.) Pain UP CAFIrSL. $12,000.000 loans money anywhere in the United Stites, Canada or Mexico, without security. if yen need money, apply to Local Agents erwrite (0 HENRY 1... HAUPT, President BUTTE CITV, MONTArM. Agents Wanted Everywhere, THE PATENT PINLESS r 14° 1 CLOTHES LINE. PEGS Agents Wanted. This is it great success, mill'ons of feet now in U80. The clothes cannot mow err. Free Circulars. TARBOX BROS. 73 Adelaide St, W., Toronto, Best, ba. trte (1, use, (1.1..1 Cheapest, Sol a by druggists or tient by mall. 60c. E. T. Baceltine, Warren. Pa. A Mitigating CIrennettenees He—Shockieg proof of insensibility that; Marriage of Johnaon's only two Months efter his first wife's dmith 1 She—Yes; but he heeded on having the wedding a very %net one on r1.0tonat Of his recent atilietion.—Ptlek.