Loading...
HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Goderich Signal-Star, 1965-09-02, Page 9NI VE Mo:nkey Island In Background 306 By Mike Cowley Now where did we put. little Johnny? The last time I saw him he was prying •his bubble gum off. the floor, No, wait a minute. Somebody said they saw him hangin, out of the window just after we cane across the border. Oh no, you don't think he's . . . • Of course not. We couldn't be that lucky. He must be around here somewhere. ..How about this for a clue?—there's -• .. a-fesh:ly dripped --patch of .ice_ cream down the back of my' friped shirt. Look over there. Isn't that him kicking that old man? Come here ` you little b ., b „ boy. What do you think you're doing? Oh never, mind. So he ran over your gum in his wheelchair, that's .still no excuse for a mugging.... Look there's the zoo, the zoo: We're here, we're here. Stop shouting will you' or we'll lock you all. up on the bus for -the rest of the day and charge the animals to come down here and see you. Aw come off it. You can't do that to us. .We'll organize and start our own freedom march. Just think about what happened in Los Angeles—think of the looting possibilities in Detroit zoo. All we'd have to do would be carry off one of the gorillas and we could replace you. All right, all right. Now line up. Behind one another not on top, stupid. Now quietly make your way out of the bus and Welcome once you are outside find your- self a partner. • What are we going. to d dance? Very funny. It's a safety pre- caution in case you get Jost. .e Also don't unpin your identity cards and make sure they stay on or there will be trouble. Aw do we have to wear these things? Look at this "Please re- turn to 'the main gate if lost." That's not my name. OK wise guy turn it round ..the other .way. On second., thoughtmaybe in your`.case you tonld-d,o---a -service-•#o-the- c munity by conveniently losing it. Now, everyone stay with their partner and with the group to which .they have been assigned and no• one will get lost. • Mister, mister. How . do yogi make a porcupine angry so he will show his quills? Probably keep tugging at his jacket sleeve with sticky fingers like you're.doing right now. I think I feel sick. Think? After five.ice...cream.s,,..._.. • and four pops it's a wonder you canr'do that": It wouldn't be so bad if we hadn't been .here only 40 minutes. Hey Mary, what have . you done with that giant all day sucker you just bought? I ate it five minutes ago. Took at the lions, look at the lions. Why doesn't that one growl instead of just lying there. Maybe it's sick. Sir, do you think it's sick? Sure it's sick. I still feel sick. How do I a, get to the washroom? Snakes Are Nice You know these snakes are nice :... I once saw one on tele- vision eating 'a sheep—it swal- lowed it all up without even .chewing My mother says you should chew everything 60 times. Do you think you should chew everything 60 times? oYes. Well why doesn't the snake then mister? Why doesn't... , I still feel sick. Hang on a little longer the* washrooms are just round this ' benc��according f`o the zoo guure' " nm- What do you mean it's too late.... ° • Do you know sir they charge you ten cents to go to the wash- room? . No I didn't but I'll bear it in mind. All right.. Let's keep moving. We've got an awful lot of ground to cover and animals to see while we are here. Now come over here and see the elephants. ° Gee don't 'they stinky_ I wand- er if their best friends have told them just how bad it is. I guess that Must be the 95 per cent that a normal deodorant doesn't touch and that's an aw- ful big 95 per cent..... Stop your yapping will' you and keep up with the rest -rt the group. Sure they smell but you don't have to make an international incident out of _it. Yes that's right. You should- n't have told that keeper that -his elephants stink. He might, be sensitive. I once saw ,a TV show where this guy was sensi- tive see and.... I still feel sick' and my feet are hurting now. You're not the only one. My -feet are killing me: When do we go back? My mother told me to let you know as soon as 1 was tired. Yes when can we go back to the bus? I'm ready to eat, again after looTcing at these smelly animals all afternoon. Oh do we have to go. I don't want to go.' Can we stay just five minutes more, •ju•st-five -minutes-- please... . Explanation--_..-_ _.- Any connection between the imaginary" dialogue above -and last Friday's recreational trip to Detroit zoo is,simply more than a coincidence. The author will carry the "scars," resulting, from' being in the Company of the 60 enthus- iasts for the 12 -hour trip.,_ for some time to come. • Only the highest commenda- tion can be given to the five re • creation supervisorS'who appear- ed apparently unruffled at the end of the trip. Mai•y Etue; Mary Cochrane;. Donna Dockstader, Bill Wilkin- son and John Pirie all did a first elass..ob of controlling the enthusiastic kids and still allow- ed them to "have a ball." To recreation director Wayne , Horner, who extended the in- vitation to join the trip, a re- served thanks. With the school term looming on the horizon one can only say: "Go to it teach— and the best of luck." To Detroit Zoo eedin