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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Exeter Times, 1886-3-11, Page 9YOU NG FOLKS. ROU!D TRE WORLD, The railroads hi the United Statesgive Craoked ice. work to 630;000 people; BY ElazeSEa'II P. ALLEN* Maniteo, Mich., has an orchestra eompon- , a I n ou women What does make mothers so ac ry, ecl of tcurtee iy n "• Martin fretfully, A four -inch dead smooth file has 864 teeth . old t3enn swinging hie new akatea, hauls Ben'a lest wonder; a d Y Chriettnee present, while a small thunder cloud settled on his round face. "I onoe knewja little boy," timid mamma, while theewin mine went whirring op, "who who said his tnacctherwas too scary about an old dead limb'; he went out on it and got his co11ar-bong, broken; did you ever hear of him, Benny 7' Bennydid not answer, but the aloud lifted a little "I once knew a little ° boy," said mother again atopping her wheel to pull out the basting threads, "who thought ilia mamma was scary because she said the water In the creek was to, •old for him to go bathing; he went in, nd liked to have died with cramps ; • : u ever hear of him Benny 7' $y this time there was a bit of a smile on Benny's face, " Yon needn't go on," he said r, "I know the rest, about the plum-oake, and Mr, Barn lett's kicking mule, and all that ; Lilt I don't see what those times have to do with New Year'. Day and the long pond." Mamma was buzzing along so fast., wind• ing a bobin, that she could not answer right away ;; presently she said, as if she was done talking' about the subject now, "The ice is cracked, Benny, and no boy is safe on crack- ed ice." Benny nuderetood this tone to mean "Enough said ;" and being really an obedi- ent, good.tampered boy, though he failed sometimes., he strapped his shining skates across his shoulder, kneed his busy mother good -by, and started off for the mill•raoe, which was not cracked, and not deep enough to hurt him if he should break through. He had hardly left the room before mam- ma remembered that she must caution him about not staying too late, and running to a front window she throw up the sash and put her head out. Benny was standing at the gate talking to George Burbank, and as the little front yard was very narrow Mrs. Martin could hoar through the atilt frosty air what the boys were saying. " What are yon going to that stupid old mill -race for Y' asked George, whose fade was set toward the mill -pond. There was silence for two seconds ; Mrs. Martin could nottee Benny's face, but mothers' wita are sharp about boys, and Mrs. Martin felt what made Benny hesitate; he didn't want to say : " Mother won't let mQ.' y did not say that. "Oh, there is aggoh a orowd there," was his answer to George's question. "Humph!" said George ;;'•Where did you et to be afraid of a orowd ? and then the boys went their separate way. Mrs. Martin closed the window and went bask to her work, too much disturbed about her little boy's nncandid speech to remem- ber that she had failed to tell him about ooming homely. Bat Benn}Js'-'c'anscienoe had had a good training about *'the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, and hills answer to George kept buzzing along in his mind all the way to the mill -race even the new skates did not make him forget that he had Bald what was not honestly true. Presently George Burbank and a crowd of other boys joined him on the mill >race, " Ho," said George, "we've come to crowd yon here, Ben ; the ice is smashed over on the pond, and lot's of the fellows fell in ; they were all big fellows, though, and got out agar." Benny shot. to the bank where the boys were :strapping ion their skates and sat down. He felt somehow as If he had jest had his life saved, and nothing makes people so honest as to come face to face with death. "Well, I'll jest tell you, George," he said slowly, "the real reason that I didn't go to the pond ; I don't know why I didn't tell yon at first. Mother knew that the ice was cracked, and she wouldn't let me go." "You don't say 1" exclaimed George; "why in the name of sense didn't you tell me? I wouldn't have gone on the ice for a pretty `good sum if I had known it was cracked. Ben felt :more ashamed of himself than ever, but was -more comfortable, neverthe- less, at having owned up. They had fine sport an the millrace, and Benny went home tired and happy. In- deed hie mother did not at firat like to see hie face so bright, her own was so grave and sad. "Well, mus," he said gayly, "I've had a jolly time, andit's well you didn't let me go to the pond, for they had a smash-up there." "But Pm afraid my boy has been en oracked ice, too, this afternoon," acid Mrs, Martin, sadly. "Ma'am Y' Benny oould not understand. "When a boy.ogivea a wrong reason in place of aright one, son, he is one. danger- due footing—as dangerous as cracked lee." "But,' mother," Benny said, eagerly, un- derstanding now what she meant, "I mend- ed that crack." And when Mrs. Martin heard the whole story her heart grew light again, and she was almost as gay as if she had been skat bag all evening on the mill -race. In Papa's Boots. BY ILL. CHARLES. It was winter, and the snow was very deep where little Katie lived. She did not like winter, . she wanted to run and play out of do Oao day she asked bor mam- mal() let h go out and play in the snow. "Why Kat ; yon would freeze," said her mamma "Papa goes out in the snow, and he doesn't keels," said Katie "But papa is larger than my little girl. Besides, he dresses warmer. Yon know what large rubber boots he wears when he goer out in the snow," Katie said no more ; but the next day she found the big boots in the hall, where her papa had left them. A large coat and fur cap were hanging there, too. r.rv, pretty poen Katie'e mamma heard sonic one Drying. She thought it sounded like the voice of her little girl. She began to search for her ; bat she was not to be found anywhere in the hem. Then she went to the door. There stood Katie, a few steps from the house, in the deep snow. She had on the big boots and the coat and asp. They were so large and heavy that she had got etnok fast in the snow, and could neither go nor come back. " I don't want to play in the snow any more, she sobbed, ea her mamma took hoc' into the house. She is now willing to wait until the sun shall melt the avow away, A Tallahassee, Fia,, despatchsays : Sarah MoDaniele, a colored woman living on M. Fish's plantation,lone mild west of that city, has become the mother during het lifetime to forty-two children, She is now arobust, saltily looking -woman, to the face, or 216 to the InoI . " A man never bees anything by polite mese," How about his seat in a street oar ? For the first time in its history the Dateli• ems county (N. Y,) jail has not a prisoner in it. Buckles of brass of the modern form are found buried in the prohlatorlq mounds of England. Judge Travis le meeting a fine two story stone residence in Calgary. he appears to intend to stay there, There bas been more snow this winter in London than for fourteen years, and there is great distress in consequence. It is said that Shanghai shipped to this continent last year not less than. 500,000 pounds of willow leaven disguised as tea. The value of the contents of a barrel of crude petroleum ranges from 86 cents to $1, while the value of the barrel itself is $2 50. At St. Helena, California, a few days ago, several thousand gallons of ten-year old California wine sold for three oenta a gallon. In Paris it costs $3 to cremate a body, and this includes coal and labor with an urn thrown in. In Milan the cost is only $1,40, bat they give no urn or chrome. A druggist at Louisville advertised his store as a " free warming place" for the public during the very severe weather of a few days ago. Statiatioe of last year's shooting in the orisons show that the chamois are increasing rather than diminishing In that part of Switzerland. Angus, Iowa, could not rest until It was incorporated as a city ; but the city govern- ment costs so mach that the citizens aro petitioning to have the city charter revoked. A silver box, shut at a wedding in Hart- ford, Conn, the other day, is to be kept nn - der neat, like that of Pandora, till the time for the silver anniversary, twenty-five years hence School teacher Brink, of Niles, Iowa, will be tried for manslaughter. He whipped a 12 -year-old ohild so severely that it is snort- ed the child died from the effects of the punishment. Mrs. W. P. Miller, of Buohanan, Mich., is the fond mother of six children who were all born within the past thirty-four months. They came two at a time, and all bat one are alive and thriving. .A newspaper of Beloit, Kennett, says that in Clark county during a recent snow storm a large flock of sheep crowded close together, and the snow, melting for a while and then freezing, fastened the entire flock together. George Leib, a colored carpenter of Sa- vannah, Ga , fell backward from a third story scaffolding the other day, turned a complete somersault, struck sgnsrely on We feet, looked around to see if any one was hurt, and quietly climbed back to his work. Capt. Tom Gregory of Winohester, Tenn., has a unique pair of gloves. They were made by Miss Nannie Phillips, who snared a lot of rabbits, carded and spun their fur as if it were wool, and °from the yarn knit the gloves. She decorated the back of each glove with the ear of a full grown rabbit. Fifteen years ago Mr. Joseph Arch was a farm laborer supporting his family on $4 weekly wages, and he is now a member of Parliament. lie is what is commonly call- ed a self-made man, but as his wife taught him to read and write he may be consider ed a creditable specimen of domestic mann. facture. A runaway team in St. Paul dasbe 1 into a funeral 'proemial, just'miseing the car- riage oontainihe pall bearers, and strik- ing the hearse squarely. The driver was thrown to the ground, the hearse overturn. ed, its glass sides shattered, and the coffin turned upside down. One of the runaway horses wae killed and his mate knookod Boneless. Wyoming hunters are excited over re- ports that oomo from the head waters of Snake River of a band of fifty head of white, or snow eik. Hitherto there have been traditions of snow elk, in which they are described as being as white as the snow, from which they get their name, and larger and awifter than the common elk. Now and then one has been seen, but never a herd. Moody and Sankey are a revelation to New Orleans, and the effocttbey are having fa remarkable, One'Senday they held seven servioea and addressed 10,000 different persons, : Over 600 attended their inquiry meeting°, of vellum, the Tmea-.Democrat says, " it is carefully estimated over 300 oonfessed Carlin, Such an interest in re listione exereiees was never before seen in New Orleans," In a slugging lnateh between Jack Mc- Gee and Tom MoM+xone, in 13 neon, the other evening, MaGee knocked his man out by a blow whish is deeorlbed as novel and surprfeing to all the sporting- men present. Mot,lee faced hie opponent and "f turned to the right like a flash, pivoting completely around, gaining in force as he revolved,' until he naught McManus on the ,j sw and dropped hien, McGee says Jack Stewart of Glasgow taught him the blow. There having been two or three runaways of unhitched horses in Chicago recently, the polka were ordered to " bring in" every rig found in the ornate where the horse was leit alone or unhitched, The new order went into effect the other day, and over fifty buggies, cabs, wagons, and drays were driven to a livery stable where their owners found them and redeemed them by the pay- ment ayment of half a dollar each, Lots of.profanity followed the enforcement of this ordinance, There Ie now living on the Piedmont toad, near Charleston, W. Via, an old col- ored woman named Clara Brown, who is perhaps the oldest colored woman in West Virginia, Of course, she well n members seeing General Washington. It was in Richmond that she met the Father of his Country. She says he entered tho kitchen of the hotel where she was and spnhekindly to the cooks. She says eke is 122 years of age. The population of London now exceeds every other city, ancient or modern, ;.0 the world. New York and all its adj scent cities combined are not equal to two thirds of it. Scotland, Swi'zerland, and the Aus- tralian colonies each contains fewer smile, while Norway, Servile Greece, and Dan - mask have scarcely half so many. Yet et the beginning of the present century the population of all London did not reach one million. The German Minister -of War has given ordera for a number of dogs to be trained with a view of testing the value of the ser- vices they might render to sentinels engaged in keeping guard during the night. .It le fully believed that by tue help of these sa- ga:none animals outposts would be far less liable to snrpriee, and that the dogs would always give notice of the approach of the enemy much earlier' than it could be detect- ed by the sentinels without such asaietance A year or so ago James Hawkins, a re- epected colored man of Denver, with his wife, went to the opera house owned by e Senator Tabot, and handed the ticket ea t-wo first-class tickets, He weal told he could not ecoupy the Beate called tor the tickets, and the money for the tick was offered to him. He refused to ace It, and brought suit tor damages against ex -Senator. A jury brought in a ver awarding Hawkins $1 damages and prion of two tickets, $4 in ail. The English steamer South Cambria brought from the bottom of the sea an int eating rel.o of the American War. • R Hing short of coal, ebe was compelled to into the harbor of Newport News. As crew were hauling up the anchor, they fo the bowsprit of a war vessel attached to The spot where the South Cambria v lying was exactly where the great naval d took place between the war vessels Congr and Merrimac, in which the former sunk. This was in 1862, and the bowsp brought to the surface as supposed to be t of the Congress. Since the death of her husband M Thomis A. Hendricks has been considers annoyed by letters and oommunioatio purporting to be from Mr. ) endricks whl have been sent to her by Spiritualists. 0 of them pretended to be an autograph lett written by the dead Vice -President in t spirit land. Mrs Hendricks is reported saying that this was a very close imitati of her husband's handwriting, but that s could easily detect its spuriousness. I not believe insuch tthings," she . says, ' donot see that any good can come fro encouraging them, That they do not con from Mr. Hendricks is'iclear to my min, for the sentiments of none of the oemmue cations are expressed in lenguage'ouch OD 1 would have need. They bear on their tai the impress of an inferior mind, are inferi, to bis while alive, and certainly inferior no if the spirit land, as I believe, elevates a ennobles the sentiments a and epiratione t the soul." TUE IiIJ.]TING LEOPARD, A SINGULAIt K zzn OE Sr.= WHICH Is PItALTIQED IDT Tits JUNGLE, 1 thick 1t was hore,writea a correspond- entt to Our 'Indian Stations that en , wt• i nessed the only instance 1 ever saw of the black buck being run' into and killed by the cheetah, or, hunting leopard, Mane consider this a low kind of sport, but 1 think it quite equal to partridge shooting, besides being a'boautiful sight. I shall, therefore, describe as well as I can what I saw. Or arriving with ray friends at the place of meeting in the jungle we found a few rough' and-roady looking natives in charge of three carts, or rather small two• wheeled platforms drawn by bullooks. Oar each vehicle sat, in an erect attitude, a beautiful leopard, strongly chained, and wibh a hood over bis eyes, steelier to those uaed for hawks. We were soon under way and driving toward the herd of ante- lopes which could ba seen grazing in the distance and which had been marked down. beforehand. There was no difficulty in getting the carts to within 120 yards of the deer. Then one of the cheetah, a fine male was unhooded and set free. Its departure from the gharry and its decision in choosing the most covered line in the open plain for ruahing ou hat rey were so instantaneous and rapid as to be quibe marvelous. It seemed to vanish from the carb and appear simultaneonsty half -way toward tho fine black buck it had aingled out for attack. When at about thirty yards from the uusuepicious troop they suddenly became aware of the deadly peril they were in. One and all sprang into the air with galvanic bounds, and no doubt expected to escape easily by flight but the hunting cheetah le, I suppose, for a hundred yards, by far the fleetest of all wingless things ; and this one wan soon in the midst of the affrighted throng, which scattered wildly and panic stricken in all directions as their leader—a fine black buck -was struck down in their midst. There he lay, alone, in his death agony, in the clutch of hie in and relent- lese foe. We ran as hard as we could, and were soon surrounding the strange group. Neither animal moved, for the buck was paralyzed with fear—his starting eye balls and dilated nostrils alone gave evi- dence of life. The cheetah, on the other hand, with his body agreed out over the prostrate form of his victim, seemed to strain every nerve impressing his prey against the earth aa, with his long, sharp t d. mimes but a hroat, he eon - his fangs buried init of a- nd g US ho nt g, nd to se n- on ed of er a, d, is e ie e a n n e d f e e' f 1- d I O1V HIS OWN GiIiO1IND+ J?r Palllrury, So YOU HAVE tnDEN EATING Too nlvc' II aux DY AGAIN. YOII WILL NEPER GET,WELL A$ LONG AS YOU DO THAT.'• :7rlmma wlto has Gately fakeyx ttp physiology) siolo g? : Ore, I GUESS I WILL 1 TIte GHASTLY' ,itllIE WILL, CIIYMB IT INTO CHYLE WI/EN' THE AGITATION OE' THE DIAGRAM WILL NATURALIZE VIE IN'SPLUATION AND RESOLVE yr INTO SWEET annex) On PAs -tannest, wnlolt INEREtlr ACTS AS A srn'ERIPia, how the cheetah had been able so instau- THE Liu KILN QLUB. taneoualy to strike down such a powerful ^---- animalimmediately on gobbing Up with ib As the mooting opened Brother Gardner I at onoe observed a single, long, deep annnunced that the ]dun. Standof# i'i' bite, gash n the flank, which was evident of Montgomery, Ala,, was to the auto room. csueed by the decisive blow. Brit I could not imagine with what weapon the leopard had been able to inflict thle very etrange, looking wound, for the cheetah has a foot like a dog and his claws are not retractile, Terning thcch„ to the heaet as it sat on the cart, 1'inspeotod ib olosely and saw that the dein-olaw,which in the dog appears, such a useless; appendage, is represented in this brute by a terrible looking talon exactly suited to the infliction of such a gash. a _ THE (KEEN t3 Ninon& MEN WHO FOUND FAvoR, IN TETE Ens of VIoTJxIA. The P splendid pageant of the opening of P Parliament and the passing of the Qaeen instate from Beckingham Palace to the House of Lords, nacelle theday, as men look on her, in her Mary Stuart mourning, when she traveled that same route as a happy young bride. Victoria, like all other girls, had some lovers before the lucky one came. Her first was the late Lord E!phinstone, a tall, singularly handsome young Seottiah peer, who was sent to Madras as Governor to gat hint out of the way. Her next was Lord Fitzellan, another six-footer, a splendid young officer of the Firat Life Guards, grandson of the thou Duke of Norfolk, and afterwards' Duke of Norfolk himself ; bub he was a Roman Catholic—a fatal objection. Fitzallan fell passionately in love with a pretty bar -maid, who ad- ministered beer at a tap opposite the Horne Guards, and wished to marry her. His family sent him abroad to get ever his young passion, and, . falling a at Athens, he married the daughter of Admiral Lyons, British :Minister there, and sister of Lord Lyons, :remember -ed' se Minister ab Washington, who had attend- ed him through his sickness, and who is still living as Dowager Duchess. Her third lover was Lord Alfred Paget, one of the Marquis of Anglesey's splendid sons, an officer of "the Blues," standing about six feet two, who is the father of Capt. Paget, married to our Minnie Stevens, and who was then her equerry - in -chief, and has continued' as equerry ever since. :Che diatinguiehed gentleman Was on hie way to Chicago to see ilia dying sister, and bad taken advantage of the occasion to stop over three or four days and make himself acquainted with members of the Lime -Klin Club. He had a little address whish he de- ired to deliver. It was entitled : " Do We Realize Where We Were and Where We ,ire Now 1' If there were no objections the addresser would be brought in. Whalebone Howker arose, not to object exactly but to enquire if the Hon. Stand- off lied 'brought any crodentials with him. flow did the club know but that he was a base impeder t "Bruddor Howker 1" sharply replied the President, "do you ems ine dot T would take a pueson into mowu cabinan' loan him a clean shirt an' purvide him wid a pipe an' terbaoker, if I did not know dat he was all right 1" "N•no, sat." "D, n yon kerflo -'. erself down into your speer, an' de less we h'ar of .you far de next two weeks de better it will be fur all kande round 1" This love affair was regarded as EO dangerous that King Leopold of Belgium, the Queen's uncle, brother of her mother, the Daohesa of Kent, was sent for. The result was that Prince Albert was sent for next. Albert was at that time a nom - teens, chaste, quiet, mild, bland, accom- plished prince, but here and there a keen obsorvermight have detected on his round, full face a flash, and in his manner a flutter which bespoke the agitation that swelled the heart beneath. Over the chimney piece, too, of his student chamber, there hung one of Chalon's exquisite drawings of Victoria which, thougn too flatteringly graceful and airy even then, still when surrounded with the intereat :which of itself lent beauty to a young girl placed In such a position, gave a fairer idea of her than would be imagined in her pre- sent grosser figure and highly colored face, as presented in the most correct and de- lightful pictures of court life, by Adam Ba - dean Albert. though little noticed, had been present at Victoria's coronation scene, a silent but not, we fancy, uninterested spectator. 'When Victoria was seated on Prince Edward's throne and the shout which proclaimed the girl he was educated to look on as his wife, Queen of that empire on which the aura never sets, rang along the roof of the good old Abbey, and was borne on the boom of guns down to the City Tower, he must have felt some emotion ; and when Elie tripped over with agile grace, to lift up old Lord Rollie, who had - tumbled, may we not faacy that emotion grew into some softer feeling. That evening, too, when, on her return, the women wept, as Greville tells us, be- . she feared to be a queen, Albert may have been near. A woman's tears. are at all times touching. At such mo- ments a life of happiness or unhappineae, as the case may be, is often built. Be this as it may, queens are not allowed to possess or at least indulge the feelings of other folk, and the news men for once did not, a few days after, convert a yawn -into a sigh or gild a smile with sentiment. THE HON. STABBOFr. The distinguished stranger was then welt- ered in. He appeared to be a person about six feet high, lame in the left` leg, of aan- guine temperament, and to be possessed of great presence of mind, . ide bowed, right and left, smiling liko a tickled baby, and begun HIS ADDRESS By saying : "Nobody knows how good it makes me feel to elan in de shelter of dis famous ole Paradise Hall an' look down upon de 200 faooe turned np to de shingles. If my stater hadn't taken a noehun to die, an' if I hadn't got a,half fare ticket to come die way, I might nebber heir sot eyes on dis famous ag- gregation of wisdom, prudence an'. progre•> shun, [Cheers.] "Whir' war de cull'd people of dis kentry twenty y'ar ago ? Let your memories run back to de close of de war. We war' men in stator, but chil'en in intelleok. On de day dat peace was declar'd had you put ma down in Cincinnati wid a $20 bill : in my pocket I should hev bin helpless. Your wise President here couldn't hev told whether a,„ shotgun loaded` from in front or behind. Had you asked Sir Isaac Walpole who Shale • speare was he would heir crawled under de, bed in oonfashun. Trustee Pullback had de; ' Pilgrim's Progress' all mixed : up wid de 'Pirate's Promenade.' Waydown Bebee didn't know whether the Onlo Riber empti- ed into de Mississippi or Salt Creek. [Great applause. ] " We war' ohiil'en In feelin' an' ackahune Da tones of de fiddle war' mo' to us den dar, de voice of Progress am now. If we had hoe -cake an' baoonwe war' content to let de rest of de world hev poetry, science, art an' wealth. Oar • roligun might hev bin all right, but de rest of us war' all ;wrong. In cur ignorance, de sun riz on de plantashun to de east of us an' sot Inde one to de, west. De world was composed of about fo' Staita, an' all de knowledge an' wisdom was sup- posed to be carried ander de hats of a dozen white men." [Agitation ] " Now, fur whar' we are. Take de finest ile paintin' in de land an' walk into any barbar shop in de kentry an' you'll find men to criticise it. Dey'll pint out de fack dal de foreground has skipped a cog, or dat de perspective oorkeorews too much. Dey'll light down on a bad sky like a hawk on a chicken, an' you kin trust 'em to diekiber anything wrong wid a waterfall or a side hill. [Cheers.] Well, at all events, when Leopold sent for Albert, quick and with luggage light as a young Canadian starting for Mani- toba, the appointed youth booked himselfin the small steamer which staggers be- tween Ostend and Dover. Tho affair was very quietly managed by Leopold. In the Court Circle column the Prince's name found rather a mean and minioned place. and as the Prince and Qaeen went out the evening after his arrival for a saunter in the woods, their stroll was un- observed except by the select few who were in the secret. But Victoria's maid, Rosalie --a kind, mischievous, merry little elf from Longenachwalbaoh, and, who was more excited that evening than Victoria herself -prattled, for a little gulden, to the court news man of how Albert's meek eyes, when they returned, were radiant with joy, Victoria looked slightly flashed, and wore in her girdle a small flower -the flower of a dove which, through all the darkness of widowhood, has never lost its freehnees—and her straw cottage hat was crushed back in front. Perchance she caught a branch -perchance some sweeter pressure—about which I think there aro some : lovely, young brides in Canada could tell. Be thb as 11 may, the club man calling, the next morning, for his tea and toast and 'Pines was startled by the announcement that "' Her.Majeate was about to lead to the hymeneal altar his Royal Highness Prince Albert of Gotha and Saxe-Coburg—•and thus Victoria was wooed and won. Sam Smell,' the converted Chicago jour- nalist, who is etiring up Chioago prepare. tory to Sam Jonoa'e advent, is described as a plainly -droned, tall, elendor young pian. Behind his gold•bowed eyeglasses are etnall eyes, and above his heavy sandy moustache le a rather long thin nose. His forehead, high and narrow, ie surmounted by very carefully smoothed dark hail;. He looke rather commonplace, but when he speaks ho at ones sheave strength, The Herald says : "Hie voice possesses that subtle, trem- ulous quality which makes mon listen. It ie a voice which invests the merest common, place with interest." " White men who come to us an' Iook wise an' talk about de sciences am astonish- ed to find dat dey am barktn' up de wrong tree. We has got dar 1 Sewer gas keeps jest as fur away from de cabin of de blank man as from de palace of the white. De science of government am discussed ober our dinner -pails as often as in de halls of legislashun. Neteral philosophy has to . keep dodgin' to get out o' our way, . [Pro- longed applause,], De cull'd race was a long way back when de last gun was fired, but dey has bin tzabblln' on a run eber since, '" I should like to talk to yon fur twig hours,` (cheers) but de oocashun am not pro- pitious. If anybody among yon has any doubts dat our race has not passed de three- quarter pole let him sot out and ,trabble a few miles. I shall now pees on to see my dyin' sister, and I shall , always remember din event wid de moas' malignant pleasure. In wishin' yon farewell, permit me to use de words of Socrates to de Egyptians ` Grum dig Solis.' " PENSTOCK TRIZS A SHOT. Giveadam Jonas moved that a vote of thanks and the freedom of the city be tender- ed to the orator, and added that he hadn't herd anything do him so mach good since water melons went out of market. "I hope dat moshnn will not prevail," said the. Rev. Penstock, as he bobbed up. "I claim dat de greater part of dat speech was stolen bodily from one I delivered in Richmond six y'ars ago 1" "It doan' seem possible," repliedithe Presi- dent. "But I am snail of it, Bala. I worked fur three weeks on dat speech, an' I 'remember atmos` ebery word of it." On motion of Waydown Bebee a com- mittee of two went out to find the Hon. Standoff and bring him in to face the music, but he had gond. Also, Elder Raffle's plug hat, Samuel Shin's overcoat and a lantern belonging to Antimony Johnson. ACQUITTED, Sir. Steven Bulwark then called np the case of Prof, Pompadour. Some weeks since the Professor was charged by a white man with stealing a wheelbarrow, and the charge was given to the Interior Department to in- vestigate, Sir Sieven would like to inquire why the committee had not reported. The Chairman replied that he was waiting for an opportunity to report that the white man had found his wheelbarrow two days after making arge,: "wharhis waechit found Y" asked the Presi- dent, ''In do alley in rear of his hones. It was brought back in de night." "1 see. Purfeseor de charge again' you am dismissed, an' you titan' fo'th an Innocent as a lamb, Nobody saw yon return de wheel- barrow, an' dar am no 'oaahun fur you to ginyoreelf away." A TEST, The Librarian reported that the stove in the Library was in each condition that ho dare not keep a fire in it any longer, and he asked for an appropriation of $6 to purobase it new one. "De matter will be laid on de table fur de present," replied Brother Gardner. "It ane a good time now to make a test an' diekiber whether thirty or forty members orowd into de Library each night Inc de purpose of en riohiu' doir minds or of toaetlpn' deir shine, Do Librarian will report any fallin'' off in numbers, Any unfinished bizneea will now be packed up an' put what' de rate can t eat it, an' We. will infringe towards our homes."