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The Exeter Times, 1884-9-25, Page 3. 'r p*17 UA,LJ l?topygCgER 11D TXU ielost� l,. G, S, GIllI.EY t LELAND 'Under L i young Past boy says the first fi!d he. .nAnQient Tale sesivesIt3 Death -140w. Unde •'til E '`8. itIta L�'1t 1'i irti7'E. 4\2tl il'ltti t.1t1.1.I. � 1 � ARRE , ever waltzed with was all filo It,lrzrled "Did you ever read the story of she Yo him. "Did camel?" Oficial rt•orts state that: the British 4.1,s it this one, paw?" ' l.aketl-heopll census en' rue" 17,000,000 ivoneu, flus, handin7 a school reader to IItr. Who wouldn't be a census, 1)ooflieker '' Ono Tewson why more people don't "Yes, that's the story." go. to the Yellowstone is beeause ft takes It told of a camel that had been lost, yellow stones to get there. A voung manmeta sage and asked: Matrimony is said to be a lottery, "Fast thou seen a stray camel, father?" but up to the boor of oing to press no "Was he blind in one eye, son?" law has been etzacteli prohibiting the use of the males. °His right eye?" "Aye, sir, Where is her New York clubs are famous all over wthe world.—New fork Exchatege, ""Anti had he lost a front tooth?" More esp evially those iu the hands of "'Yes, } es, father, that is tie. Const the police. thou direct Ire to him?" Little girl being asked Viler grand- "And was be loaded with honey on father where cotton grew, replied, loath the -eight side?" men's ears." OULD SA s T() 118. those witintend purchas:8..g to •l. so from the tnaunfaetnret The dealer who buys to sell again trust uecessut•ily have a profit. We Taint to givethe purchasers the beneat,whi ,i cannot fail to meet the views of the Grangers. Our exnellses Aweless -thou those of cite. paanllfal'tltrkrf GRta9ey+tent wecan selloheziper "Yes,. father; that is the ve initlfal. Emblems of all the Different. Societies here can I fail him?" UTE WOULD call byecialatttentio o our'nndtrtaking depart aient,which is more coma ttletetballe.s eras we have. addedse`a,ral drew deadgns xt of late The b e SGi>i U d atasketa slnrcuds,attd eveiyr. 'uneral requisitt at tr'e lots est pric' e+ Our new Hearse is pronounced by competent judges to be second to core to the Province 5, the greatest simplicity, "In 0 gentle- "lie was, father, he was." "And on the left sWe with grain?" The following is extracted from a, "Enlists, father. Wilt thou send me smart boy's composition on "Babies"; to him?" "The n others's heart gives 4th joy at "I have not seen thy eainel, son." Never does a man believe so strongly Idescribe_hina?" ly the baby's 1st 2tb. ""How then const thou sr, accurate in the attraction of gravitation as when Look you, son; my .a isdona bath he sits down in a chair a d f ads it 1 taught me to reason from effect back to ,. n u ;s cause. See, here upon the left side of the .,one. grnipped, ..Portilne knocks at. everlf IAau'a cheer better uponatch h the e ricrht is unthe, The once in a life," but in a good many iI have reasoned that the camel, whose eases the man is InaneighboringItraeks show which way he was going;, and doss not hear him ;could not see the sweeter and better Nu fashion chat: ""1 oor creature;"' w.- ;could upon the right; ergo be was billed claimed hers. Groograin, ;colons at the pictures of node sava"re woman, "no clothing of any kind! I wonder What the poor thing, have to talk about?" --- A roan had just said to a. Mend, "Let's take another " when his wife an the right side. "How knewst thou that he had lost a. tooth?" "Look, son, where'er the grass is cropped atm blades stand in the middle and show that where they are the tooth turned the corner, but his ditty to iris was absent." wife was not forgotten.' -"view of the "Ah, father, shy wisdom is greats political situation," he added. slow knoav'st thou of his burden?" ""lou must be a quarrelsome fellow," said a phrenologist to a man whose bump be was examining. "Say that again and I'll knock you down," was the response. "I saw the bees upon one side suck- ing the honey that had strained througit the bag, and on the other side armies of ants were laying in the store of grain that had fallen over from the Loss of sleep, It is said, is making "Now. then." said Poollicker, as he wen small and puny, That Is a fact handed the book back to Titeo11hi1us. "I Just look at the difference in Physique can vouch for .that story, for I was the of a delicate scholar and the robust ;little boy. But the wholes story is not night policeman. Au editor in Georgia says: "Gold. is found in thirty-six counties in this State silver in three, diamonds is twenty -sin, told there. I was, in m' infancy:, kid- napped by a band of gypsies who car- ried me to Arabia and sold inc into slavery. One day my master bought a and whisky in all of thee, and the last camel from a roving fellow who said the gets away with all the rest." animal was sound and could trot in 2:13 Schoolmistress—"You sec, Inv love, to buggy ur ruu, catch -weight, in 1;31 If I puncture this india-rubber ball, it on a heavy track. My master thought will collapse. Do you understand?" he'd make a pretty good gentleman's Child—"O yes, 1 understand; if you roadster, so he bought him and told me prick 11 will go squash." to take hint down and have some steel plate shoesautl toe -weights put on. hila. When I reached the iilaeksmith's the Lord Chesterfield, noticing, a very grave and awkward couple tl'aneing a animal began to ;yuck like all 'ria out, minuet, said they looked pas if they were and shoo dull;"* it for Inoue and were doubtful t. his head until his mane made about getting; 1)ait mesio in the air. 1 dein t know what ailed him, but the 1)1nel:smnitlz said has had toothaeh,s, :and after examining his mouth a little he knueke,l out one of his upper front `teeth with as harmer and the animal benne. as slut alt -a as could be "zed srex and to look s million thanks from his great, big wet eye's. ..hat's theway the eanlel last the tooth. I learuet1 to good lesson from that blacksmith. When I was farming in Arizona my cattle and sheep used to act that way and I always cured thou by knsseking out a tooth. And what seems to be most singular is, it Was al- ways one o' their front upper teeth." "Say, paw," said Theophilns. 'lad you told ale about that 'cause only yesterday teacher read out of her big nook on zoology that camels and cattle 2nd sheep and all other moments don't .Iatie no front teeth in their upper jaws. ilia shows that teachers don't always know what they're talkin' about. Don't Its„ Doollleker went around to the cow- tlled. He has not yet come back.— Chicago Herald. There are two classes of unmarried womten in soeiety, "scrawny old maids" and youth "chits of girls." You learn this by hearing each of these classes de.1 scribe the other; The right kiwi of a buy with a pea- shooter can take .a man's mind off his business troubles and polities quicker than anything else in this bleak, cold world. The published 'metre of a benevolent society seas; Notwithstanding tho largo amount Maid for medicine and medical attendance, very few deaths occurred during the yeas" A plant has been found that cures bashfulness. It should be promptly tried on the man who leaves the hotel by the back window because he is too diffident to say good -by to the cashier. It's very easy to st;trt false reports. Just because a woman, while buying n bronni, wanted one with a heavy and stroug handle, it was reported around that she was in the habit of beating her husband. — +-- "I watched the billows by day, I watched the sea by nie'ht" says a cur- rent poet. Ile should- engage himself as a hotel clerk at the seashore, where he could watch the bill -owes all the time. 1)i; ;lin has a horse which lie called "Grnphy." -Very' °tiff name," said it friend. ''Not at ail." responded Tom; "when 1 mount him it's Topography; and when Iwant him to go its Gee-bo- Graphy,"—Somerville Journal. A reporter who had just done his first boat race wasrcbul_ed by the city edit- or for not mentioning anywhere that the oarsmen "took water," and replied that none of them took water, they all Look gin. A crusty old fellow once. asked "What is the reason that griffins, dragons, and demons are ladies' favorite subjects for embroidery designs?" . "Ah, it is be- cause they are continually thinking of their husbands!" was the quick retort. A cicerone, directing the attention of a foreigner to the portrait of Harvey, said: "This is the man who invented the circulation of the blood, discovered. fish -sauce, and wrote a book of medit- ations among the tombs!" • "William," said'a teacher to one of his pupils, "can you tell me why the sun rises in the east?" "Don't know, sir," replied William, ",''Dept it be that --the 'east makes:everthin ri3e, reach- er fainted. A tiny pig was served at a fashlonabie Boston dinner ;the other evening, and when he Was placed on the table a and wept up from the ':assembled rank and. fashion surrounding him. The little beast stood on. his own hoofs in the midst of a bed of Maershala Neil roses; in his rosy snout was the customary lemon, and twisted in his small tail was a blue pond lily. How her chef accomplished this feat the hostess refused to divulge; and. thouohpork is not usually admitted, in any ?orm, into good society, Mr. Pigcy .vas duly cut up and .tasted, and the, health of the' Chinese nook duly drank in champagne. �:leirl 4"' ,4,.:9 1;"''�''A a the 611,00g'Sfal x Pof Lata f,vl EllterpiiS" t! ;f ultl R ^ ,48. t. '.�, •• .24.4 txls 8.,} :. yscfc:a ...tt.n tut:.;. en. 11$0 o ,•.es:' Gf ; t . Sarsaparii i, • ca t L1 I A iD has reconnect:. ed ,a t :?AntLt a In tinily s;hilar n u to ':., Q s never yet heard of iia f:rll- I `�-✓ C I �`i l! .�+�r I r Iago sates; erre. Sento 1... +.L^R 4n0 Of Mr. I st:.tsn`s farm lalgwers bruited Isis kg. °slug to the WA UNABBt"AKER AND CABINET-MAKER, - ' ugly wellipg eves of amu 1 acrofulous6 erlu 8.r !.Ce.tred, oa the injured limb. Nor- r:10,• lor-r b 1 ring of the skin, with buri,trg and d,u,a . VII s through the lump,, ,n::. o life • o.'4,1 rable. The leg b4 cam. ener- tnc o l• r; •.latul running u1^"-� t slued, n1 -osis:,-. , great quantities of etventely oar . ur rr i^r. No treatment %Kos o1 tiny avail n.::I i e ma^.t. by Al I rt ASn'R/km - tton, v: s 8,8. •"'.toga with Avt n'+ SsxsArA- IItl.t..a, s h cit aliavr1 the p'ie stat Irritation, bea)e,l the, sorss, removed the /me1Gng, and completely revered the limb to use. 4tr. Luta-oto has personally used Ayer's Sarsaparilla, far Ir,'s, ,,, ...n8. .•-• t8. (-Fere a-ecc. t ; and, aft r t, , in t.,..4. 8.... 1 -t: S . 4 ne, t.., , at :a u•. t t.tn nnertl 5 urn s ted n..,. conducted et the very 1ow est rates. Aiy;Stock of 'Undertaking goodeis targe, complete end we assorted, and any Person ;Nuking anything. is this line will dealt to theiradvautngeto give a call. and eis*etne fel themselves. I have just re.e ved a urge stock Walnut and Rosewood Caskets; also L"offags Qt every descrip- tieq. 4 complote stock of itobes and Triuttnluge stwsy on hand. Thy latest styles of Chamber and Parlor wits A11 kauds of Furniture at tno loweStrates. Tall, BEST 18.1 RSE 1147 'um COUNTY tetuomber the phaco -•-:nearly opposite gelnp'q Tobacoo Store, staita-id •set, Exeter. t?ONN 2313l4,W N Ezceter Pest Office Time Table. AILS ,rant Kirkton,Woodltam,Win ..lielsewtaud 7:llnsvillo ... ... ... ...&15 a.nt IRO r,w South,eastmid tivesLlnoltitling London .11enailten, Ter out* Montreal, tfanit. obs,L*nited iitates.1ngtieh and foreign mails ... ... .... ... ... ... ... 0.30 a.02..e 00 a. m South,eaataud west ... ... ... ... ... ... ...'6.:5 '.m. 121 p. 117a North and east.iucludingGoderieh, Wtnghaut, Eitwardtne uud:allpoirttanortlr,' i titretrotd,Toroato, Mot+treal,and Flssteru States-- ... .. ... ... ... lC.ctla 8.p .&29 a.:u 5410 p. m..E.VO p. rue - ... C.nap. na. '540 p. w. MONEY ORDERS rsauedand (paid on and front adv AtougyOrder°dice in the Dominion of Ca"s.la,GrestBritain Anti ireland,l3rItish India, *lc+wfmtnilsuta,+,ernlalay,Austria-,Italy. Australia a nsl the r'ntte,t States.[ POSTOFFat1F Sa'J1NGRUANR. Deposits will be receive at this alike from Bite *Mai. Depositors obtaining the Postm aster -1 eneral's special permission eats deposit 81000. I)ettositsan Sittings hank account received front rt. to4p:ns. °Mee hours font 7,iid Ron. tu'i p. AI. Lettersitttendcdforregistration [mist be posted 15 m lnntealtetore the closing of estcit 201521. N 11 --It f9 partieulary rognrsted that the senators of matter will kindly atht the names of th mantles to the addW sties. I'roiISO PILES— $YsIP1'0MMS AND GU1il: '1'hc symptotus tiee moisture, like perepir- ntinn, intense Itching inercase.l by sr•;ltclun3; yery distressing, particular at night; seems as If pin -Worms wens erawlin in and about the rectum, that prjvato parts are sometimes af- fected. If allow,•,; to eantauur very serious re- 5111150215)'follow. "8WAYNI SOi\T1IEN7"'' is a pleasant, sure care. Also for Totter,. . Telt, $:alit-Illuntan, Seal; II, ad, I aa.aprlits, • Barbers' heti, LL.teli 's, all s8. •zly-erneat Skin Diseases,. Boa layutai,I, i0 0043 for 51,2.1. S Address, S)l1, AYNI, & SON, Phila., Pa. Sold by Druggists. A Pass in the Mountains. A discovery has recently been .made 1 in South America which promises a most important change in the future of that monster peninsula. As well known, the Andes Mountains are 8.t barrier be- tween the west coast and nine -tenths of the territory of South America. This has kept back the progress of the inte- rior, which is inaccessible except from the Atlantic coast; but now a pass has been discovered in the mountains be- tween Chili and the Argentine territory, near Lake N'aheulhaspi. This will open up an immense fertile territory, hereto- fore one of the most neglected corners of the globe. By this pass a railroad can be built from the western outposts of the Argentine Republic, across Chili at its narrowest point. where seventy miles has to be occupied, to a Chiliad port at the head of the gulf which lies between Chiloe Island and the main- land. This pass opens up a country with the temperature -very much like the United [States, that is, on a latitude with Tew York The middle of the next century will see tnyriad's of human beings occupying the fertile pampas east of the Andes. The commerce will be conducted through this newly dis- covered pass, and perhaps others may be found , equally available for the dense population yet to be developed Smith of, ;the'' Equator. Who linows, perhaps, .the eccentric sukgestion of Rowan Helper to build a railroad from the extreme North to the extreme South on the tops of the Rocky and Andes Mountains along the whole length of North and South America, may yet be realized.-•Dentorest',, Monthly. A German has paten ea an invention which stamps him as a Yankee by na- ture, if not by birth. It 'consists of a little book whose leaves are made of ?erfumed toilet soap, and is meant es- pecially for travelers. When he wants to wash his ;rands -he simply tears out a leaf (one is sufficient for the purpose); and the book can be put back dry into the Docket. AD'VIC'E TO MOTHERS. Are you disturbed atnight and broken ofyour rest by asiek chill ;mitering and crying with pain of enttin0 teeth? If so, send at once and get iabottle of M1.y \YINSLOW'S SOOTHING SYRUP,' Itsvaluo i incalculable, It will re• Ilevo the poor little sufierer immediately. De- pend upon ittuothers, there is no mistake about it. It cures dysentery null itinirhoen, regulates the stomach and- bowels, cures wind colic softens the gums, reduces ivanmwntion. awl gives tone ani energy to the whole system. Mns. WIt'ISLOw'9 SOOTHING Sritnr Fol[ CisILA. Iasv Tnimurss is 1,1',is;Let to the taste, and is the prescription of one of the oldest and best female nurses a:,R pinys,icians in the 'United States, mud is for sale by all druggists through- outthe world. Prior 25 cents is bottle. ate_ Ti LNNPNT & T,G+ NNENT, Vetexi- 1 nary Surgeons, Graduates of the Ontario Veterinary College .Torou to, have o for the trenp t Domestic An ened an office ment of all imals, on Main street. Exe- � �'� ter. Calls from u distanoe:_ prom»fly at ended to. Medicines for Horses, Cattle, &c always on hand. • Health & Happiness for alt. WILL C,UREO,R RELIEVE Biliousness, Headache, Dys- pepsia, indigestion, Dizziness, Jaundice. Dropsy, Fluttering of the Heart, Anc' every species of disease arising front Impale libiud, &c. &c. raft rA la F; t,'. ev 1'tili Climax 'Chernical Compair( MONTREAL. 1J0111, Postmaster. It 1• l,i.:, unlet]-.t,,e<:' i,u'ta: s• all shot, Al r,:- . glut; to s:.•> a .. ,.,.,a.:. y tn. . 147 1 •..Leas ,.Y' swt.oi.:..nl a:ly s... r .,t 1.:$ sna,auaoah ( :.at 1..:+'•, L9:17, or at t'u• p^ n :ar I.c.:;:nit i., • w ,. I,r _', aanle ..t Etrect$,:iear work.. cxt.n.ite;knowledge of the 9044 i, :. unequalled eradlcatorot Warta ;'e:'•nne eea, ;ex hint to giro lugtdress touch valuable iufornuttion,. rat eattEn BT Dr.4.0. Ayer& Go,, Lowell, Mesa. sold by a31 Druggists; ?II, six bottles for *5, STOP 85000 EREWA'RD.� M,nrr .r C„rehr8tN, 2ha hlih r.pa• TH LEP, t t hr, Oor�,,,..-, a«a,i. c.asa, ra.1.,,. tar the Cat. et etalo. 0*11,. Aatdma Mad mins ass.. Aass Ilea ti..50 *parlous t Is pr oda, leu.R.e10ce ae,,. Ma'. 11Na.M P1851, 51 1,,, to grot"arad on by Pant 11: tem yo Ji e0., sole proprl.tor., AUGaata„ Nuts., To pre. that ,mu..ln from amP.Mitlen sn, Dn. th„ bol*1 sad ..a that tlw'nam.05P „'. itsla aa, praytet, Autwt..![r, is shwa,* the t:aa.e of the elo, A- r.w off of 5*000 et :AbdU e5ar.4Ar. rietor f soy we a�ae owing half t t8. ,,1.) IA 8.h. preptfAtmo01 oar a oMtl1.hoWls : h.,t Re t,, teenmossh.is of seat.. cares of Mthma sad 1.510K +r. In ;ho e'ts s ;outgun of Pol►. ray e . b8. .a re. hta Druggists sad Countryper dog. to dealePolders. rem. 108.011 as .*i.tiper4.r. sdr.lan. OA%0\GBa0s.. ARNICA and OIL LINIMENT CURES ALL Pains and Aches, ANO 15 THE MOST PERFECT WILY MICE in the woo SOLD BY ALL DEALT Rs, PRICE, 25 AND 50 C;NTS R�!i 811-11:. RE NSALL PORK PACKING HOUSE Having eummenced business for the Fall and minter Trade We are prepared t o pur'chase anynuautity of Pork„§ubjectto the followingregulations We will take off two pouudsper hundred if dry, and three pout) d if soft. •Should [ rtdolt twenty-five Beats. If any of the], nng gats are left i.i, 25 cgntsextra will be deducted. No proK will be bought at any price it :Watt?. Weman t all flogs' (Jutting tight through breast to her, 1. and :aim s opened oat to tail G & J. PETTY. IA7 0 1? -1.1 P'OWDE h. — Aro pleasant to t foe,Contain their awn Purgative. Is to a:de, sun, awl etteccuat *troyor or woriva in Children or Adult` TO FARMERS! GREAT REDUCTION IN PRICES.. NOAH FRIED, --OF THE Dashwood Flouring Mill Wishes to return thanks to his numerous customers, for the past liberal patronage given him, and since making im- provements, which is a large' saving on fuel, will do --GHOPPINGi-- until further notice, at the following --rates :-- OATS, OATS, SIX CENTS PER BAG, And for all other grains (Peas excepted), SEVEN CENTS PEli BAG. TUESDAY, THURSDAY df SATURDAY, Are my i eguiar grinding days TERMS - Strictly Cash. N. 13,--Iflonr & Feed sold at a close mar- gin. Don't forget to give ns a call TO IT FP.XEt3, Dnebwootl,'Feb'y:7th, '94 `,