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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Exeter Times, 1880-4-29, Page 6G GETTING Tu THE REAR. The following related by an officer of the Stonewall Brigade, zne.y interest 'some of our soldier friends tee While Jackson's cod's lvati ea ntious- ly moving to the rear and flak of the Ueion army M Chaucelloreville, the Confederate cavalry in advance bedtime engaged with the enemy, S ton n. wouuded and bleeding trooper *as seen 'enlarging from the Woods in front. Af- ter looking around he moved in the direction from which the infantry were marching as if seeltiug the rear, or as the average gray -jacket would say, be r'ar. Soon after rapid firing explain- ed that the bale -jackets had closed in. behind jackson, and it was not long be'o'e the poor cavalryman was seen e iniiug back again. When opr ;site the"Stone)vall;" another cavalryman from the front also arrived. No. 1 et O'le"f' recognised him, ted said ''Ii;tilo, 13i11 -w' nnd•'d ?' "Yes," sail. No. 2, "but not bad. • Let's to the Car." At wbiicll No, 1 exclaimed t This the tlarntlsst f elft I've bin in yit, It han't got no ta'r." JOSH BILLINGS. I1E Irl\ E4 a+':•I''; VERT SAGAt iOUS ADVICE TO ''Q 'U I:" fizNGT:.I:3.. Deea Miss ; —This id lti important epuek into your lift. The fust thing to maple a gaud quire is to gi;egle a little. Put up you: hair in e lrl papers ovary Friday nite sole to have it in good shape S'tnday zooming. If your dates• dy is rich you can bay some store hare. If he is very rieb bay solus more, b'lild it up high upon your heal; Hien tet a high priced hounet that rens TT very high, at the high part of it, end gir. tIp milliner to plant some hi;, h grown arli libels onto the Liehest hart of it. Tali.e will help you sing high, as snl)raue ie the highest cart : When the tune is giQ nut, tlnll't ray Atte"nelinn to it., and theu giggle. Gig gle a good dt el, 'Whisper to tho girl nest you tine Em Jones, which sets on the 2 til 'awe! Low the front on the left-hand side haps her bonnet with the sante color exec' she had hist year, and then pat op your bo•ek to your face and giggle. Object tc every tune unless there i a solow in to for the soprano, 0.'tf�ard 11um a good: deeJ before' you bogie] to sing, \,rhen yota ging, a. salcw shalce the artifishels off germ. b')nni'r,, and when you come to• tt high tone brnoe yourself' back a little, twist yonr head.• to one side and open your 'month the eitlest on that side,sent the eye on the same side j:1st a triuh•le,.aaa:lrthe'u: put in for deer life. When the prettelsee gets under lied way with his pr"aehine.wvite a note on- to the bla'ik leaf into. the fourth part of 3':aur note book, That's. what: the blank leaf was made for. Git some- body to pass the note to somebody alga,. and yon watch them. while til:-ya realb it, and th"u giggle,. If 11:tvbod;y t .lbs or 11tffdtia the con,' gregatshun and the pteaeher takes notis of is, that':( a Ted ehants for you to I*izele, ant you ought to giggle a great (1:,e1. Tni' p re: tchot' darseut say any. thilttr t't yen beketue you. are in the (lair.. If you :end hon' before yotn w,lnt it1 rt the q•tirt', givs him the. mlttez?--• you ought to, have eemebodkit. better n.00'. Don't forget to giggle. A. CONDUCTOR W110 BACI{JD IDOMg. • Before the train 1rft .Bay City" yes- terday morning for Detroit, a .womatr 0011' ly .i <' feet tail, and hiving acom- ph'xiofl Mtn ii freell turned brick,. en• tered the depot followed by a.; dog al. most as big as ayearlitli, eatlf. tiaaviue purchased 'a. ticket, the, woman stool lyeeitlh the t•'ain until the conductor calors clang. when she led off tvith; "You 1inve been l)ointed out'. to tua as. the boss of this train." "Y s'm," Wa,s hie modest reply.. "Well, I'm going to, ,Detroit for 'the• old man." "Al t ;his dog is miller,• nl'nwg with trate.: lJt''gras where 1 go,, evei;y, day. T S tE TIME arwwrAaaw+*,.a.w«+.*.s,«,....,..,...,w«.,w,.ww«._,..,,.w..rs++ww++inn.+>ta�s�.'.:w.•an."•w+ncro.�r,^r�:"rrmr.+xe»; the year." "Yes, he OAS.. go .dawn in 'the bag. gage ear," "Not any he can't ! That`s what Y t"tpprd you fi.r. This 'ore dog is going long in this Fere oar and nowhere el- Bo." rules of the road------- " "Roles le hanged 1 niy old man eau be banged ar:luud by everybody, and he never demands his rights; but Lu- einfill. hain't Thotuas-r-not by a jug full 1" "';1Ittdatn, lot 'file J"1 don't want no clawing off !" she interrupted, as elle peeled a pair of bleek mittens off her big reds hands, -"I'In going, and what I want to know is whether you want to rliQo a row 11)' rhe oars or have it right now and right here ?•' The conductor 1,oked the dog over and was about to shake his head, when the WO man bele ante -log her bound. and quietly reinarkel : ''1 'pose, biting as I am a woman, it is not more titan fair for he dog to sail in with me. 0 we hero I,ttouitltzs !" "•.ifadnane," replied the conductor, as he felt a cold shiver go up his legs, .stake your dog a'ql go abtaard, „Honest It.jun ?" "Yes." "No raw after the cars start ?" 11 "No," "Then that settTee that, soil much obliged, tboneh you slid )(Meer hatlig flit' at first. Leonidas fuller we :mil behave yonrself. !" THREE \\011ENIN ';OU vr. There wag a jury trial ill Justice sill ley the other day in which nearly a d+'zeu people livitag i❑ the western so, cls: tie wore mixed up as plain titre, de f''1.114108 11.'),1 tvittlosa•ea, It )tppeere that sl'a. 131ae.k borrowed a wesh'tub of Airs. Brown, and white in possession of the borrower a 0.'w knocked the but - nen out. Atter a.»eighb'trhood •gnitr- rel, snit was brnnght to recover the antitrust. Mr-. Brown thereupon lout in as nit offset dist she had nursed the plaintiff for three Jaye and received uo 10,y. " Nur.e for !" echoed the defendant, "ehc eat, c1i.1 nothing;' whi:H she was tite!e but 11nv (loa0 custard pie and tatt'e fib .u' the neighbors." •'t.,ust:tt tl pie 1 and who lent you the s11i'atlop'a'l eggs and lard to make it ?' h. l 1. el lite 011101'. 1 t i, i1 :ler put his• font down and. pat eh. it np a temporary. truce, land he vIttintit; to,.k the etau.d..to testify ahunt le'1tiIi'ti the t rib ttnd what it was worth. She estubll 1r-211 the value at 75o, end alar+ t,:3 d-ieu.litot belled, over load ex. °lei:nen : "7eveitiy five cents 1 Why both ears and the top hoop %rev.' riff 1 LI, wasthe only tub ,:11[1 bas had •itiee h -n• mar rage, anti that tt'1t.s rl,t.nt toH y,„,„;a•,,{•'." "Andve had t') lt•ll, 1t to v n r very r1".uet•day all that time 1" retort. d.. the. plain t i ff. His Heiner aecu:'e'i silence in tlhe., court, aril the d[401:dt1nt took the stated tall said that 1,•1' se'rvic'es its nnl'se were 'worth at bast $2. "What ailed the plaintiff.?t' asp eel the lawyer. "Weil, I d oe't 1: -now as I" ar;bt to say that her. Intebltu.i struck her with--"' "Don't n't yon dart to say tlia,t 1" inter ruptt'd the pl:luatil,, "yeti knew that I fall down lh cellar nt".:•est. If toyehni;• band hit m0 on • the heal with a pleat. platter, as yo us dict, r"Lubjoet 1" excla•itn.d both lawyers its thorns. "So d'o the 1•' adderl'botll ''en1:11es iu a breath. Hi, Honor porwiie,T the. (leek until everything 'attiet3, t'.tld thou a witness was put on the stand to testify til:tt she saw the tub when it was lent and aagain when it had been damaged. Site tl#aad.scareely got stared. the de• remises, whose witnetis•e?tae was, galled out "You are not sweariug is ;