HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Exeter Times, 1879-8-7, Page 2'Your rife going to the country ?'
ask. t1 i.i recn tta ne n1et 13rotvn tel 1Vovd•
THE FOOTMAN AND !.UE CON-
VIOT,
The Eingstou • Whit says a good
A: t'ti avonao yesterday. story 1.3 tola at the expense of one tri
nese not. 1 oiter& 1 her $50 to the Governer Uont-r"ti's footmen, talose
ready, bat-t•ho declares right up auti in.ufft ittbly snobbish servttuta who put
t;t an tl.tet., kIE won't go.' on suoll airs !aero in direct ()mitt net to
you, worked tho ill -health the example set them by the A1algnih
lc,, t9 to ?' tun], i',.ince Is.
triad to ; slut she lets gain- \i'hon the two distinguished guests
s t January,
ttti<t:t:u pounds since 1,61, J.6u t 31
:11x1 nor: r 1,,ohed ht ttcr,than now.
Cu"•u't Fon i t Ike her 1.rlieve her
r t 't'e-• ,:le ivlttxii g ? flhttt getters:11y
f.url, pretty welt.' .
L(.1.3.11.t ttt, it. She alt cps like abrick, joker despite the s':ber surr.)UIP.tinks,
anll,er nerves warts XIV stronger,' Huta so I1c� raid that he was arrested for
!And she doesn't want to see her steeling; a sawmill, reuleuibo:it:g an old
i other?' juke al that glass..
"lIet mother id. deals.' The servs u t seemcd astonished,
'lli ,fi.tivn good ?' "Aw, weatly, i'ttw that ?"
,Ileaditl, She eats everything,from t "Yes," said the pt'iwner, `:but they
a radish to limburger cllceie, and I
can't tail: change 1:t' dint to her.'
Green felt to lnusiug, and ;by and by
cn11'iu'1• d
:—
were inspecting the � tlltitcutiat•y one of
the servants addressed .a ecinviet
"Ayr, my niau,whut are you in Beath
The priaaner• WAS sontowIia of a
did not tuind that so nlucll. It was
because I went back to steal the darn
that they went for lite."
{{ The tipnkoy 6161i1 it WAS very extra -
Mr. Brown, you have been a good I ordiiltU'y, mad left au tigittttl:d and as-
h Dell
ts-hDell to me.' tei11.:11cd man,
VVt,,l, I male so.' -
'Yes, you have stood by me like a Ir WAS A Ills.—Any Person pass -
brother, aid now I'll do you et favor, lug ttluti{f Ii)Ward Street, just before
My wife left fur nor mother's yesterday, noun;, ,.,.eider day, woniti of the hslave sen him
to11 gone ten weeks I trioti every 3' t
be
yard, a pillow under his head, his
tiotlg,�e I colts,.! ,.!sial,. of, but she ryas
hound to stay home. At hist I hit it. ftiet au t6 1)01!011, and a magazine in lis
She has freekles. hands. He looked the picture of coin -
'Ah ! Egad ! So has mine.' tort and contentment ; nod the MIAMI
'NotlutrtT but the country sir in June
!ming along with 1 ullback dresses on,
•
will start freckles.'
'Trite—true. Peels 'em right off in
feoni fatty to eight.weeks, leaving the iitatecl out 011 i110 still summer stir, and
cuntpletien as lair a babe's, and with.
Leeched a loudly cord in the Howard
nut injury to the most dt;licate eye street lotto's heart. The echoes souud-
browe.'edto him like the funeral whispers--
You see—'like the whispers of the night wines.
Mr. Green' I see it all. I shall
sighing through the rand old wilder -
never forget your kindness. In less +' K graud
a week my freckled wife ' Hess.
will be in Berrien County, and you ' 011, solemn bell !" he said ",Oh,
and I will stay nut till two o'ulocl: iu sad, solemn—!"
the morning, and then go to my house
and sleep .in the best bed with our
poote on ! Mr. Green Lor' b'ess you—
shake ! Any time you want a favor
you may rout nae up at midnight and
command !—Datroit Free Press
WANTED TO 141 RA R` THE PRESI-
DENT.
A Washington dispateli to the Ohi- He got up like a man in a hurry. He
cage .News tells this story . .A. tall,
strong, healthy -looking young woman
with a straw hat jammed over her eyes
and with a long linen duster over her
dress called at the White House Monday
afternoon and said she wanted to see
the President, She sent in her name
as Emeliue Noble, The President ad-
mitted liar, and when ehe saw him she
said:
"When
me?"
Tho President saw at once that he
had a crazy woman on his bands and
replied :
"Why I have a wife already."
" But," said Misn Noble, "1 under-
stood you were not living 'with her
now. I wrote you three or four letters
offering to Lntrry yon, and as you did
not answer, sileuce gives consent, and
here I am."
The President said he had to go
down to see Mrs. Hayes, and as he
got out of the way of the tall,strapping
young womau ho called two police of.
3iicere, who took charge of her. Up -
nu taking her to the station she was
found to have $250 in her pocket,while
her appearance snowed that she belong-
ed to people of comfortable means.
She was sent to the Government In•
sane Hospital, where it is was found
that her people resided at Freemont,
Iud. They telegraphed to have her sent
on to them and they woul d pay all ex-
penses. When sus was taken to the
asylum another woman,Mary Elizabeth
Ooburn, of Montgomery county, Md.,
bad just been brnaflat in. She also
was insane and afflicted with .a marry-
ing
arrying mania, bat the case was a little dif-
ferent with her. She was ready to
marry anybody in the whole world.
She also was sent home.
MR. SPURGEON RINGS IN A
JOKE.
sighed and wished they were men.
The great city hall bell struck the •
Hour of noon. The deep -toned echoes
THAT IMV1ES
suture
ad. Udera
S. 1+AIIII3a1IBM has on hand at Henault as Large
its handsome a stock of-VeRN.tTIIRE as eau be
.1 in any estakllitlintuilt in flu: on, all of which he
!S.,. PREPAED TO SELL CHEAP !
UM'DERT4KINO IN ALL ITS BR/INCHES
Having proc irtcl a handxon e hearse, he is prepared
t' attend to LTN.LiF,..11'.1:4RINt.T,
Tcralas,
On il,it. Most R8880,1010
� 1
T ,tort kin'• RusiucFs be n.eshe Anti foe tic l'lttict,.Avhlch .
In connection Iv1h. the L r x gt preserve,.
the
respectfully solicited.
"ti'r,1,'r t,1f>i�l
_... :tet . ....._ _... _??.
r t1ihi,I.4 tt IA. Al l.11?i' liti'1'itit'I'itA.111 i
C a 7 +"t.l'i�i '�"."' �!; d w'.:?
Till 110xta and t'160'1'IIII;l'artt
Tithe pleasure to b form tbt i mib .tunt� of f;xetl
,gala surrounding ccantll gait tm•y have ju.t
epo„led out al, It.ee!,.lady:c ttne+tttof
" teas, i:ntltilc,,7
t,thetttrstaxvI ttteaez,.t ins,.n,.c;lat.1.tesm•s:'t
taut ill °e ut nt r 1 t,l u't > I) . t!u y can shit th.r
TTHE
.t11.a tt Y1:.i.1;.lA
to , q -
bo: ty and dastroys t 11 CI%onsive v'iors; ax prevents 0oldtagi.tn arise+g from rionii'bodics• A. call I g
o`.�`"„b' '
.` .� s,l', w° „ „l' . P1anin r;' Mi ll So oh f.
That was all he said about the bell.
A. bumble bee settled dowu on dile to
look for engar, and as lie turned partly
over, he gave the bee a rub. It is o
bad thing to rub any kind of a bee.
He feels insulted and frets annoyed at
things which a moll turtle or a dove
would pass by without tt thought. The
echoes of the bell wore just dying away
when the Howard•street man got nil.
are you going to marry
didn't meander—he went like a rocket.
Something seemed to ail him. He
made a line fur the house, went up the
st8ps at a bound, and, as his wile asked
him the rause of his haste, he replied,-
"Thunder—oop 1 hoop !"
"Is this house ou fire?" she asked,
as he tore around the parlor and up-
set Things.
"!louse be—oop ! Lordy 1" he an-
swered, as he made a circle of the room
and dashed into the 11011.
The dog xusbed after him, the 'wife
rushed after the dog, and the man
bounded out of the bone.
"Are you crazy, Robert ?" shrieked
the wile, as she beheld him pounding
his lege with his new silk hat.
Two or three boys ran in from the
street, a strange dog came in and got
up a fight, and all things conspired to
make a lively time.
"l•Ie's got the colic!" yelled one of
the boys.
,.Or the tremors 1" shunted another.
"See that hat !" called the third.
"Boys, go out of Here," whispered
the panting mall, after ho had stopped
using his hat. They went out, and as
he limped iota the house, his teurfnl
wife asked, ---
"Now, then, will you tell me what
has happeued ?"
"No, I won't 1" he shorted, and he
didn't. She fell into hysterics at the
thought that he had usnd his brain too
much, and had suddenly became craz-
ed ; and he went down to the drug
store and applied arnica to the spot,
and informer{ the clerk that 11,997 of The
the largest kind of bumble bees settled
right down on him in a body.
Fortune telling has its admirers, and
yet there are those who fail to see its
beauties, and one of these "victims"
tells how. .
Mr. Spurgeon recently told this
anecdote as he gave out an anthem :
A high churchman and a Scotoh
Presbyterian minister had been at the
same allurch. The former asked the
latter it ho did not like the "introits."
He replied, "I don't know what an
introit is."
Said the Churchman, "Rub did yon
not enjoy the anthem ?"
He replied , "No, I did not enjoy it
at all."
"1 ata very sorry," said the church.
mair' "heeanso.it was used in the early
Uhnroh, in fact, it was originally sung
by David."
"Alt," said the ' Seotohtnan, "then
that explains the Scripttn•e. I can un-
derstand. now, if David sung at ,that
time, why Saul threw his javelin at
hi tri ."
This was fon() WO by a Ionil peel of
1n.nt htcr, when Mr. Spnrgeon said.
'l.dI'S 1,:in;tho an!h^tit.
E
—t
,.1 i 1 FTE
E
T NI E S
Cheap •
DO -Olt AND •
ALL KINDS O1"
TURNING
-Done I)one to order.
Remember thcplace
11 vex. a EC ow ard Eros
HEN BA.�I.Lr
! PORK PACKING HOU8E
Having commenced business for the
Fall andWinterTrade
We are prepared to purohase any quantity of
Pork, subject to the following regulations:
We will take off two pounds per hundred if
dry, and three pound if soft. Shoulder stuck,
twenty-five ceuts. If any of the bung gut is
left in, 25 cents extra will be deducted..
V) por will be bought at an price if
warm.
S A7LTS .ACarES
—.AND...
Pork Cuttings
on hand at reasonable rates. •-
We want all Hogs Cutting aright through
(roast to Head, and Firms opened out to tail.
G t j. PETTY,
Washburn & N ae r Mfg. to
iia t:m11r•, -e ,ir., r. ontrent?, 3'. Q.
Sole Manufactures in Cala la of
PATENT
STEEL BARB FENCING
THE BEST AND CHEAPEST FENCE
for Railroads, Farmers, and
All kinds or printing done neatly cheaply and with dispatch. Stock Raisers..
Order you work where you can get it done the cheapest. ,e p or
EEL Thorne 'Hedge. No otherrusts, singsu
cheap or put up so quickly, Never rusts, staled,
ctectys,shrinks , nor warps. Unaffecteei ov fire,
wind or flood. A. complete barrier to the most
unruly stock, Impassable by mttn 01 best.
42,000 MILES Or BARB I•'ENCE ERECTED LN TIi&
U`iLTE1 STATES 111 LAST
TREE =Amis.
Ask Yourself these Questions -
Are you a despondent sufferer from Sick
Headache, Habitual Costiveness. Plapitation
of the Heart? Have you Dizziness of the
Head ? Is your Nervrns System depressed?
Does your Biood circulate badly? Have yoa'a
Cough ? Low Spirits? Coming up of the foot
after eating ? 66e., &e. All of these and much
more are the direct results ori Dyspepsia, Liver
Complaint and Indigestion, GREEN'S A.aeus'r.
FLowrn is now acknowledged by all Druggist,
to be a positive cure.. 2,400,000 bottles were
given away in the United Status through Drug-
gistato the people es a trial. Two doses will
satisfy any person of its wonderful quality hi
miring alt forms of Indigestion. Sample bottles
10. gents. Regular size, 75 Bente. ,Sold
positive by all first-class Druggists.'
Ri M0I"A..L'.
11A•U' would remind his numerone
ar Customers that he has removed to the
&io13formorlyoecupied bytfr. Rood, whore bo
will be found ever ro't iy to atte..d to all bunineas
in the BOOT •'nil SLOE) Lino,
O. RAU,
Crediton,
Colored Work a Specialty
TIMES OFFICE has excellent facilities for turning olit
CARIDS, .
'BILL
f
111A -DS,
P1e/'' S „ ' R S,
OIROT1 L f .f.,11 'IJI&,i
For the Gardner, tbo Stock Rai er, the Vine-
yard Piopriotor,J3ART3 FEN CRR is toe only per-
fect fence. SEND MR Iua.'0a RAT)D CA'rALOOBS.
fig Active parties to 8.02 as
(3onerslAgonts for rho sale
of our npeoialtten. 1 psi.
ness respectabo. t3ooda$ie1Y
rapidly. We pay sitar sale,
,.try and expenses, ora lib-
eral commission
ib-eralcommission on saixs. Prom' 100 to $200 a
month can be •mado by live mon. Rare (Mance
for makingmoney, References ra
sulrod. Address
TRIUMPH M'F'G C0.,116, Mo.rnes t1 ', OstrcAoo,
ILL.
,.Chicago Medical College
Twenty-first annual Session degins September
pl LaborGraded ory stabiis ed, Anatomic 1k2aterial
actually ab.indant, Seats numbered, and secur-
ed in orher of applioation, Professors fees $7:1,
Practitioners`courso through April ; fen $$0, For
announcement or p rtioulars, address
PROF. J 11 BoLLIsTdr.R:71 Randolph St, Chi.
cago,
•}} ��qq IiOfficial Reports frac.-- en 90 days investmeo. of '1 An
6�.6LIo� AW
Proportional returns every week on Stec) options
of 520, St0,:100, -' $500. -Address
T. POTTER WRIGHT& 00., Bankore, 35 Wali
8t N.V.
SENDTo F• C•f. RICH of Ge•, Portland,
��++ddVV �D Maine, for rho boat O envy bnsiuess
in the world. Expensive outfit fres.
717a moa hh,aud ovpon sus gnu ranteed to eget try
4 outfit free. SEAW & CO, An gliata, Itfalno.
777 A MBAR and expenses to agents
l Outfit free. Address P. 0. Vioke).
Augusta, Maine.
AAvertisemerlt of week 110 inserted ars
� week tf1,5;0 newspapers
no
fur :1:10 Bond 10 cents fo 100 page pamphlet. 0..
1 1 "O WELL & co: N..Y.
ST. AI l;.SiY'S IiII%ItSVOItli.S.
tiurttrawnkiln s beingitow in full opera.tinu dna,
turningcutdailyft largo qwin tit) of
Es
t,fatforall purposes
oanuot be surpassed in the Domin.
1011.
eartiesfrom adtate:neeeanalwayeberr*piled
either atthe kilns or fltfliyerdbyteame at low
set remunerative rates,' 0rderefrom s distune°
ttrattt+ptly attended to.
WH>TSt'1 • .& 8O1JATE11
•rt M.A..,a,. ,,at'�.