Times Advocate, 1995-11-29, Page 15(Aocoj
November 29, 1995
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Chris Skalkos T A staff
EXETER - What exactly is a "hockey mom?"
"Someone who spends a lot of time in an arena and gets involved with
their kid's hockey," says Anita Davies of Huron Park.
"A mother that spends long hours driving their kids from arena to
arena," says Mary Becker from Dashwood.
And according to Barb Dietrich, coordinator of the Exeter Minor
Hockey Parent's Association, it's a mother or a father who works with
their children's hockey coach and volunteers countless hours helping out
with fundraisers.
A popular stereo -typical image of the hockey mom depicts a group of
flamboyant middle-aged housewives sitting in the bleachers with their
noisemakers screaming obscenities at the referee.
Not true.
Well, not entirely.
Hockey moms are simply the mothers of children in minor hockey
who are actively involved in supporting their kids; and they are no
doubt, a driving force behind local minor hockey systems.
Whether they are shuttling their kids to and from games and
practices, baking a cake for a fundraising bazaar or washing uniforms,
dedicated hockey moms are behind their kids 100 per cent, and they
love every minute of it.
Davies has three children enrolled in minor hockey teams
representing Stephen Township. She is also a director on the
executive board, a position which made her appreciate the amount of
work needed to run a hockey system.
With two of her sons playing on ail -Ontario championship teams,
Davies estimates she watched close to 200 games last season.
Including the time spent at summer -time executive meetings,
fundraisers and, most importantly, "planning victory parties", a
good portion of her life is dedicated to hockey.
"I think if your kids are going to be involved you have to help,"
says Davies.
So important is hockey, Davies says it dominates the topic of
conversation in and outside arenas. Congregating at the arena
also provides a social aspect for the parents.
"It's actually our social time during the winter. We socialize
with other parents and make new friends we wouldn't otherwise
meet," she said.
Mary Becker has four children playing hockey from atom to
midget in the Zurich minor hockey system.
"I have one in each level this year. Including practices we arc
usually at an arena every night of the week," she says.
For Becker, hockey provides a great opportunity for family -time
together, and she says the sport provides a positive influence on her
children.
Dropping them off at gads or prdctices >'na picking them up
afterwards is unthinkable to Beckg,_.._
_:._
"I hate missing my kid's games. One of us [her or her husband] is
always with them," she says.
As a parent, Becker says you can only provide the opportunity for
children to play hockey and over eager -parents shouldn't pressure them to
participate.
"You can't push them into it. Dragging a screaming kid to the arena is
hard on mem and you. It's something they should want to do, they should
be there to have fun. That's all that counts," she says.
Becker emphasized schoolwork comes before hockey but often finds
herself playing the role of the referee when trying to balance the amount
of time her kids spend at the arena against the time they spend behind a
desk.
"Homework is the first thing they do when they walk through the door,
but sometimes it comes to the arena with us," she admits.
Unlike Stephen and Zurich, Exeter Minor Hockey has a formal hockey
parent's association. Started by the late Pauline McCann in 1984, the
organization recently switched names from "hockey moms" to "parents"
because some fathers wanted to get involved.
BilckeAnita Davies, Ste
Exeter minor hocks Stephen Twp.
Y, are actively involved nor hockey,' children's
Becker
Hockey moms
with their children 's hockey minor hockey an♦� d
Y teams. Mary Lou
This year's coordinator, Barb Dietrich, says the 17 volunteer members
play a big role in all aspects of their children's hockey.
. They are responsible_ for carrying out fundraisers, distributing
schedules, acting as a communicator between coaches and parents, selling
draw tickets and coordinating picture day.
"There's more to it than just driving the kids," says Dietrich who has
three children playing for Exeter teams.
Dietrich says the dedicated hockey parent goes beyond the association
members. For example, she said the ambitious Bill Batten minor hockey
tournament held recently relied on a number of volunteers to pull it off.
Not a problem when you have a pool of approximately 190 ambitious
hockey moms to solicit help from.
"Every parent we asked gladly helped out, no one said no. I was really
impressed by the support."
Dietrich says cheering your children on at a game is like therapy after
a hard day's work, but some parents are a little too vocal.
"They [the loud ones] have to realize the kids aren't out there trying -
Sometimes
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out for the NHL, they are just out there to have fun. I hate it when parents
put kids down. I prefer encouraging yells," she says explaining the referee
is the most common target for abusive language because he's the only
adult on the rink.
"I'm not a real screamer, especially at the ref. I like to cheer my team
on positively. After all it's still just a game," adds Davies.
All three hockey moms say, as much as they enjoy hockey they don't
watch televised NHL games. They would much rather watch their
youngsters play.
In essence, these mothers are not what arm -chair sport experts would
call "hockey fans." They are, however, their children's biggest fans, and no
matter how involved parents become, Becker says just being there for their
kids is what matters the most.
"When they score a goal the first thing they do is look towards where
the moms are sitting. You can tell by the look on their face, they know
you're watching them."
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