Loading...
Times-Advocate, 1984-02-01, Page 4Foga 4 Times -Advocate, February 1, 1984 Imes - dvocat Times Established 1873 Advocate Established 1881 Amalgamated 1924 Serving South Huron, North Middlesex & North Lambton Since 1873 Published by 1.W. Eedy Publications Limited LORNE EERY Publisher JIM BECKETT Advertising Manager BILL BATTEN Editor HARRY DEVRIES Composition Manager ROSS HAIJGH Assistant Editor DICK JONGKIND Business Manager Published Each Wednesday Morning at Exeter, Ontario Second Class Mali Registration Number 0386. SUBSCRIPTION RATES: Canada: $22.00 Per year; U.S.A. $60.00 C.W.N.A., O.C.N.A. CLASS 'A' and 'ABC' Mt Is Agri News necessary? Government intrusion into competition with private enterprise appears to be increasingly popular these days, despite the fact it is highly questionable as taxpayers have to compete against their own tax dollars. The Ontario ministry of agriculture and food is the latest government wing to reach out into the market place as it inaugurates a new tabloid --Ontario AgriNews. It will be distributed free of charge.to 82,000 On- tario farmers, thereby competing directly with numerous newspapers, magazines and periodicals which currently serve the farm population. There is little evidence to indicate that farmers are in need of this new government service. Not only have the number Of farm publications increased in recent years, the quality and depth of coverage has improv- • ed tremendously. Unlike Ontario AgriNews, the other publications don't merely tell farmers what the government wants them to hear. They balance the news coming outof the ministry public relations departments with views from industry spokesmen and opposition critics. They give both sides of the story and allow readers to intelligently reach their own conclusions. There'll be none of that in Ontario AgriNews. It will stick strictly to the government line in all its self - glorification. In short, a publication by the government and for the government. So, take heart farmers. Some publishers and their staff members will soon by joining you in your cur- rent economic woes while the ministry of agriculture and food undertakes projects to spend dollars in every way but good. Nervous humour There are those who are deeply concerned over the apparent war -mongering antics of U.S. President Ronald Reagan and some recent comments did little to persuade them that he has much else on his mind these days. Following the recent Super Bowl football ex- travaganza in Florida, Reagan appeared on TV to ex- tend his congratulations to the winning Los Angeles Raiders, but couldn't get his mind off other thoughts. "I think you're giving us problems. Moscow just called,and think Marcus Allen (the game's MVP) is our secret weapon and they insist we dismantle him. If you turn him over to us we'll put him in our silos and we wouldn't- have to build and deploy MX missiles," the President told winning coach Tom Flores. The comment was probably an attempt at some humor, but it's the type that brings a nervous chuckle at best. Time for a Grand trip You know how you've put off getting tickets to see a play at the Grand Theatre in London because you figured all the performances would be sold out, the best seats would be gone and the ticket prices would be too high anyway. Well, apparently Londoners don't realize the wealth of theatre they have in their community. There aren't any lineups at the box office. Performances aren't sold out. And any seat in the house is a good seat even if it's a relatively cheap $12.50. Londoners haven't been flocking to the Grand even though in the four months since Theatre London brought in Robin Phillips to establish his new perma- nent repertory company, .the renamed theatre has earned national attention and the respect of critics from New York to London, England. It has even been invited to the prestigious Edinburgh Festival and the West End. So with all the excitement you'd think the Grand would•be packed every night. But not so. Apparently London folk haven't quite awakened to what is being offered. The Grand is fortunate to have someone with the vision and energy of Robin Phillips and the com- pany has a remarkable talent. , Perhaps, ordinary people perceive theatre as a pastime for the rich and the snobbish. But theatre is fun. The Grand's production of Godspell is an excellent case in oint. If you haven't done something exciting or different recently, why not try a trip to London and take in a show? If the weather's a problem, advance tickets can be exchanged or you can phone the day of the perfor- mance and they will hold your tickets for you. And the best part is that seats will still be available because Londoners don't realize the Grand is a world class theatre now. Lucknow Sentinel shortest time intervals A discussion has broken out in the let- ters column of the Times of London, England, as to what constitutes the shortest measurable interval of time. A woman started it by writing that, in her opinion, the shortest possible interval was the time between her opening of the front door to let her dog in, and the animal's request to be let out again. Readers took up the challenge and pro- vided some insight as to their choice, one suggesting that the woman was entirely wrong, and that the shortest interval was between the moment you replace the telephone and the moment you realize you had something else to say. . Many people can visualize that situa- tion, having found themselves blurting out one final comment or question into the telephone while there is a click at the other end. Drivers may agree with the comment that the shortest interval of time occurs when the traffic light in front of them turns green and the impatient motorist behind starts to honk his horn. One of the shortest intervals of time, and possibly among the more annoying, is that between sealing an envelope and finding an item that was to be placed in it. Coupled with that is the fact that envelopes with which you have the most difficulty getting tightly sealed come from the same batch as those that would defy Houdini when you think it's going to be a simple matter of opening them again to insert what has been forgotten. That becomes even more difficult, of course, when the envelope already has a 324 stamp affixed to it. Some people will probably indicate that the shortest timeelement is the one bet- ween immersing themselves in the bath and hearing the front door bell ring. Mothers usually have countless ex- periences to prove that the winner is the time between scrubbing the floor and hav- ing the kids roar through the home after playing in a nearby mud puddle. Also high on everyone's list is the time between accepting an invitation to a "ho- hum" affair and receiving another for BATT'N AROUND with the editor what sounds like a much more interesting and exciting event. At this time of year, most will attest to the fact that among those periods of time at the minimum limit of measurability is the one between shovelling the walk and having the heavens open up with a deluge of snow. It ranks right along with clear- ing the driveway and then having the snowplow pass by on the street to dump a new mound of ice and snow that is twice as heavy as the one you've just removed. Once you get into this thing, you start to realize the list is almost limitless. If you've got a favorite, drop the writer a note and I'll be glad to have it published. But don't delay...you know how quickly something comes along to distract you. It was noted in the aforementioned that some people are plagued by the situation of sealing envelopes before they've in- cluded everything that was intended. While the writer's daily pile of mail is probably larger than most, it never ceases to amaze me as to the number of empty envelopes that lo arrive. The ma- jority of those are no loss as they would ve followed the other 99 percent into file 13 anyway, but every now and then one comes along to .cause considerable consternation. It usually has a hand written address on the envelope as opposed to the "dear oc- cupant" type and results in a hurried search through the pile of rubbish on my desk to see whether the contents were in- advertently dumped. So, it takes several minutes to "clear" an empty envelope in comparison to the seconds involved in sorting through most of the other communications. I begin tr, wonder if the whole thing is a practical joke perpetrated by someone who has had the same experience and knows how exasperating it can be to find an envelope with nothing in it. Oh, if only the income tax department people were so forgetful! * * « « * Progressive Conservative leader Brian Mulroney would have us all believe he's been dealt a low blow by Finance Minister Marc Lalonde in the hassle which has oc- curred over his conflict between a plann- ed trip to Europe and the timing of the next federal budget. While he clOms it is vital that he be pre- sent for the budget, •the fact is, the budget can be brought down without his atten- dance because he's not going to have any input anyway. The only vital aspect is that he would miss out on the opportunity to get media coverage for his condemnation of the budget. No matter what the document contains, you can bet that Mulroney will have main- ly negative comments in true political style and probably has already started to prepare his speech to denounce the Liberals. It's a speech that any member of his party could read, but that wouldn't give him the valuable coverage so necessary to foster his image. T <z WE OVERCHARGE 60% LESS A P«%. To TO MAKE YOU SIAM.? YEAd- Ti r Boring conversationalists Canadians, on the whole, are probably the most boring conversa- tionalists in the entire world. I don't say that id- ly, . merely to put backs up. I say it from agonizing personal experience. It's not because we are a dull p' ople, though we are. It's not because we're stupid, because we aren't. It seems to be based rather on a sort of philistinism that labels in- teresting conversation as a "cissy" pastime,fit only for dilettantes, idealists, Englishmen of a certain background, educated Europeans and other such intellectual trash. Next time you're at a dinner party or any similar gathering, lend an ear. The dialogue will depress you deeply. Perhaps the real fault lies in the fact that we are basically a nation of materialists, and that we have become more and more so, with the wither- ing of the churches and the increasing affluence of our society. Our topics of conversa- tion change with the decades, but remain awesomely inane in their content. A few decades ago, men could talk for hours about cars and hockey, while women chattered in- cessantly about children and recipes. Nowadays, the men talk about real estate and boats, and women go and on about Women's Lib and the trip abroad they have just taken or are just about to take. And they all say the same thing, or near enough. All of them, especially the men, are absorbed by their vocations, the sadistic' cruelty of the revenue department, whether it's a power cruiser or a swimming pool in the back yard. µx. we're white.'-' Behind the politicians, but not far, are the civil servants. Empire builders, defenders of the status quo. Everything in t� Waoy�F j c`�4, Sugar and Spice Dispensed By Smiley Get a gaggle of editors together and they talk shop, golf, and how much advertising linage- they carried last year. Seldom a word about a powerful editorial compaign they are going to launch to half an evil or promote and good. Dig up a deliberation of doctors, put a glass in each hand and listen to the drivel about the iniquities of medicare, the in- gratitude of patients, the penal taxes they pay, and thecondominium they just bought down south. Not a Best nor a Banting in the bunch. Lawyers are just as bad. They may be a bit more sophisticated than the doctors, but they're hust as dull. Dropping ints of inside dope on politics. Obsessed by the possibility of getting a judge ship or at the very least, a Q.C. Criers of the blues about the taxes they pay. Y• A party of politicians is even worse. Jostling for attention, back-slapping everything that is warm and breathing, needling the enemy, seeing everything in black and white. "They're black; quadruplicate. Every- thing is secret. The public is the enemy. Always go throuchannels. Don't get a black mark of your record. Dull, dull. Ah, ha! The farmers have been sitting back en- joying this. They're every it as bad as the rest. It's the government's fault. Its the chain stores' greed. It's the fickle public. It's the weather; too hot, too cold, too dry, too wet; or, if the weather is perfect and the crops are superb, it's taking too much out of the land. Business men are just as culpable of devastating dullness in their conversa- tion. Too many forms to fill out. Lazy clerks. Second-rate workmen. Those dam' shopping plazas on the edge of town. Manufacturers are in the same boat. Wages are too high. Can't get parts, what's the matter with those people? Too much absenteeism on Monday morning. Profit down .03 percent last year. Can't compete with those lousy foreigners who work for peanuts. Too much government interference. Dentists ditto. They are just as -dull as the others but ihey commit the crime of asking a particularly dull question when your mouth is so full of junk that all you can do is grunt, and then think you are interested and agree- ing with their platitudes, when what you are trying to say is: "Shut up, turkey." As you' know, I always save the best to the last. When it comes to dullness supremo in conversation, I have to hand it to the teachers. They go on and on and on about some kid • who just won't do his homework, or some mean- ingless memo from the of- fice, or some student who decided to spend a nice day in God's great out-of- doors instead of in a dull classroom with a dull teacher. Maybe I've been harsh in this somewhat blanket condemnation. Certainly none of my friends are dull conversationalists. Maybe that's why I have so few friends. Or perhaps my remarks are based on pure envy. I haven't got a con- dominium in Florida. I haven't even a row -boat. let alone a cruiser. 1 haven't a two -car garage. That's it. Jealously. I don't have a swimming pool or a little place - just 40 acres, mind you - in the country. That's why I can't stand around with the doctors and lawyers, etc., and commiserate with them on the fact that the price of steak is going absolutely out of reach of the or- dinary professional man making only forty-five thou a year. Out of the same bushel The computers which are now found in many homes under a variety of names like Vic -20, Apple, IBM and Atari 800 are all basically the same. They have some way of putting in information, by way of a keyboard or a cassette player or a disk drive. This information is then put to use by the cen- tral processing unit which then spits out a product of some sort, for example, a video grime. Other things that it 'outputs' are print- outs (using a printer), in- formation like your home budget, or simply a letter you may be writing. How does it work? Well, not as complicated as you might think. Almost all computers work nn a system of swit- ches. When you press a or mathematical ques- tions it can turn on. The old computers :may Perspectives By Syd Fletcher key �n the typewriter keyboard a switch inside 'turns on' the appropriate light on the video screen. Another switch controls the exact place that the letter will appear on the screen. As you can see, the more switches that a com- puter has the more lights (before 1956) worked on transistors. The ones before that used the same type of tubes that you us- ed to see in your radio. In 1956 the integrated circuit came along. Four tran- sistors could be placed on a little board about/ the size of a dime. Now they can put almost half a millidn switches on that same little space. More switches. More powerful computers. As simple as that. If you still feel a little nervous about computetrs never forget that you can turn them off as simply as pulling the plug and turn- ing off that essential main switch. I'm sure people felt the same way about the first automobiles and airplanes when they came out. Great inventions but are they really here to stay? Believe it. They are. And so is..the computer. Better try and get used to it.