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HomeMy WebLinkAboutTimes Advocate, 1997-02-05, Page 4Page 4 Times -Advocate; February 5, 1997 Publisher & Editor: Jim Beckett Business Manager: Don Smith Production Manager: Deb Lora Advertising• Barb Consitt, Chad Eedy Mews: Heather Mir, Chris Skalkos, Ross Haugh, Brenda Burke Production: Alma Ballantyne, Mary McMurray, Barb Robertson Brenda Hem, Joyce Weber, Laurel Miner' Iransoortation: Al Flynn, Al Hodgen Front Office & Accounting;•EIaine Pinder, Sue Railings, Ruth Slaght • Ruthann Negrijn, Anita McDonald, Cassie Dalrymple The Exeter Times -Advocate Is a member of a family of community. newspapers IAM �pyM 00, ��M►, providing news, advertising and information leadership 1111111 i:1 )1 TOR1A1. They need time to be children omething has gone terribly wrang,for.our children. Right now, soon -to -he -graduates are firing off ap- plications to various post -secondary ed- ucational institutions and are worried. sick the university or college of choice will refuse -them: People are reeling over the story of young hockey stars victimized .by a sexual predator. - Tiny gymnasts have literally starved themselves todeath to maintain the tremely slender, childlike body shape Olympic judges want to see. Sexual abuse is not unknown here, either-. For Olympic star Olga Korbut, it was the • price of being allowed to compete There is nothing unnatural about par- ents wanting their children to be suc cessful. We Want the hest for our little. Ones. • But far too often. our children"are get ting the messagethat to he acceptable. they, must -achieve high marks, he popu- lar, good at sports, and physically at tractive as well. They can't mess around the hockey -rink. they have to be on an organized team; and jnust score goals. They can't just join: a club, they have -to he president. They'citn't. take dance classes for the fun ofd it, they have to get: trophies. • The message comes from many dirge; tions - parents. teachers, coaches. fash- ion magazines. Some have the hest of intentions. Some think they are doing it for the sake of the child and don't know when to•ease off. A few are doing it for the most selfish of reasons - wealth, personal careers. thdir dwn perverted drive for success. and yes, for sexual 1,. gratification. The problem' is the kids, and their par- ents, are buying into the message. Eve,. ryone knows families where the car is on the go every evening. and weekend, • ferrying kids hack and forth to dance class, music. hockey practice, swim,. team, and more. . - - - Sometimes the pressure, -the stress on success, -results in an award, a medal, a contract. -But sometimes itresultsin the suicide of -a kid who can't cope with it all. Suicide is -a significant cause of - dcath among young teenagers. So is "ac- , cidental" death fromrisktaking behav for like drunk driving. ' - The statistics don't show the kids who suffer mental anguishin an effort to make the team", pull off the -grades. - The statistics don't show the kids who seem: to achieve so much, so young,- and then burn out of control the gold medal figure skater who gets arrested for im- paired driving: the junior model and htiftiecotning queen who ends up in a re= .ligious cult hawking carnations in'down- townToronto: the child actor in drug re- habilitation: •_ . And they don't show the kids who just collapse under the pressure. Music les- sons -can be. wonderftil, dancing can - teach grace; sports can be fun. But when encouragement becomes intolerable-- Oressure, when the need,to achieve he - comes so intense a child will remain.si- lent about physical pain; or even sexual ahuSo. we have gone much too far. Children need to be protected from sexual predators more than-they'nee&te make the team.They need to Be allowed . time to -he children - to play, to dream, to tell silly jokes to each other - more than they need another after-school or- ganized activity. - - .In the long run, confidence. self es- teem and good health will take them a lot further than an extra trophy on the mantle. • Srrugeen C's! Neiv.t What's on your mind? The -Times-Advocate continues to welcome letters to the editor as a forum for open discussion of local issues, concerns, complaints and kudos. The Times -Advocate reserves the right to edit letters for brevity. Please send your letters to P.O. Box 850 Exeter,,Ontario, NOM 1S6. Sign your letter with both name and address. Anonymous letters -will not be published.. A View from Queen's Park TORONTO -- Progressive Conservative Pre: nue; Mike Harris has had to go along way back -- half a ..ehtury -- to find a herd. Asked in an interview whether he models • himself after any of his predecessors. Harris mentioned George Drew, premier from 1943 to 1948. Harris explained that Drew "was a great vi- sionary in the sense that he wasn't afraid to build and prepare for" the future." citing Drew's construction.of roads and adding: "1 admire the courage to be able to think and plan ahead." Harris passed over and thereby snubbed five: Tory premiers. Tom Kennedy (1948-9): Leslie Frost (1949-61). John Robans (1961-71), Wil- liam Davis (1971-85) and Frank Miller, pre- mier for four months in 1985. But Harris's admiration for Drew is under- standable. Drew. a former military officer, was confident, commanding and brooked no opposi- tion -- traits Harris often shows -- and like Har- ris took hard -right stances that included crush- ing his closest rival, the Cooperative Commonwealth Federation, the New Democrat By Eric Dowd Publications Mail Registration Number 0386 SUBSCRIPTION RATES: One year rate for Ontario subscribers - $35.00 + GST Two year rate for Ontario subscribers • S63.00 +.GST CANADIAN ADDRESSES OUTSIDE CRAM One year subscription - *63.00 +.OST ' Two.year subscription - $119.00 + OST • OTMER RATES Outside Canada - $102.00 Published Each Wednesday Morning at 424 Main St., Exeter, Ontario, NOM 156 by J.W. Eedy Publications Ltd. Telephone 1-51.9-235-1331. • Fax: 519-235-0766 email address: tlmes.advocateeeedy.com G.S.T. #R10521083! O Simple Cruelties Brenda Burke Heart to heart Valentine confessions Valentine's Da}' is coming. Are you ready? Don't forget to. buyyour sweetheart a traditional box of chocolates or a sprouting -bouquet of flowers. - Don't forget to send your loved -ones -at -a -distance cards ' that have red hearts and pink slashes all over them.. •- . And, don't ever forget to help the kids fill out their little boxes of 'Be My Valentine' and • - 'Sweetheart. I'm Yours' mini, -cards. If you warn to go -way out. you could always hilt' one of those heart cak:'- and decorate it .with . ti•^ :n•nanion hearts or plc.., up tt• $--og with a silly grin. ti lits a heart in its hands, it: sole purpose in the world to make someone laugh heartily. Valentine's Day has always stnick me with painstaking awe. On one hand it's great to have any sort or -celebration in February besides good old , Groundhog Day (something 1 . never believed in). But in other ways thy red holiday sneaks up on me and makes me feel • • • almost oblieated•to buy .something red or-chocolately,or s(uffed with pink 'cotton halls. in public school I would - spend time gazing curiously at , naked. winged cupid figures - . strung from,tile 'ceiling sections in the. library. •"Watch out or cupid will shoot you with his arrows of love!" We were told.inGrade -3. Cringing in imagined pain.'I steered clear of those cupids at least until high school, - .What amazed me even more was the first time 1.received.a bunch of Valentines stuffed inside the paper heart I'd made and strung across my desk.- , Grade 1 expressions of undying love. demands to 'Be Mine,' and excessive compliments exclaimed in , . speech bubbles ('You're Special' or -*My One and Only.') were enough to make me squirm. • • Then came the days when it wasn't so cool to give out Valentines. especially to someone you actuallyhad'a crush. on. If you gaN e the person you sat behind in third row Math class a Valentine that said. - - ',Be Mine 4 -Ever,' would.they take it to heart or laugh about it later inahe washroom? r. When you're married. on the , other hand, Valentines are nice but don't they just reiterate what • other hirthday.-Christmas and - Easter cards have to say? And picking out cards is hard enough without feeling • pressured to choose someone else's words todescribethe ultimate expression of your deepest emotions. - As with all types of cards. the picture.on the front may be great but the message often - turns out corny ('We wish you ft in each and every way. a- very . happy Valentine's Day!!!') Or. you'll actually find that; message you think- expresses " how you truly feel. only to close • the card and stare face to face with a cartoon cocker spaniel holding a red bow in its mouth. Valentine's Day..:cute, very red and sometimes with its special ,moments. Party's predecessor: by -warning of a Commu- nist menace." Harris and Dri!w. also.had some similar poli- cies. Drew campaigned successfully, as did Hat- ris in 1995. by promising tax cuts, elimination of bureaucracy and re -arranging of responsibili- ties. with municipalities, which has Harris in a .bitter struggle. - Both.took- pride -in spelling. out their proposals in unusual detail, Drew in a famous 22 -point program for social and economic development. Harris laid out his policies fairly comprehen- sively.in his Common Sense Revolution plat- form a year before the election. ignoring the view that this gave critics too"ntuch time to pick them apart. and won. - One difference between them is that Drew ex- panded some social services. while Harris is contracting, but when Drew was premier social services were rudimentary and a stronger case could be made for expansion. - Kennedy, a caretaker, did not serve long enough to make a mark. Frost was the first in the line of moderate premiers and as such would Harris finds hero from the 1940s not have appealed to Harris. Frost made more strides in expanding social programs, introducing hospital insurance. and trebled the provincial budget. but also intro- duced a provincial sales tax (at 3%) that was quickly dubbed the Frostbite. His own nick- names, including Old Man Ontario and The Great Tranquilizer. reflected his ability to ap- peal to all groups and smooth over potential trouble. while Harris dotes on aggression. Robarts exuded government further. includ- ing providing more money for education and • French services, and if he were known for one issue, it might be establishing safeguards for those involved with courts, tribunals and bu- reaucracy. while Harris is more for the rights of police. Miller was closest to Harris philosophically with his advocacy of such far right ideas as a flat tax on incomes, but scrambled leftward try- ing to stay premier after losing a majority and was in office too briefly to compare. Davis expanded government most, buying land that was never used and a hotel and part of an oil company. imposing rent controls, giving subsidies to often thriving firms and piling up debt..all of which: would be anathema to Harris. Davis also stepped hard on any of his MPPs who showed admiration for Ronald Reagan and Margaret Thatcher. particularly Gordon Walker and Jim Taylor, and helped unions by requiring checkoff of union dues. Davis.would definitely not be a favorite of Harris. . Robarts also promoted national unity by speaking passionately of mutual ties and ar- ranging talks and Davis by swallowing antago- nism toward federal Liberals and helping patri- ate the Constitution, while Harris has not made it a a priority and been content to say what Quebec needs is a prosperous Ontario. Harris would have known in reaching back to Drew as his role model he was saying not Da- vis, not Robarts, not Frost and declaring lack lof confidence in Tory premiers still widely re- spected by the public, but he has no sympathy for those who do not do it his way.