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Home My WebLink AboutTimes Advocate, 1991-05-15, Page 8Advertising Feature Times -Advocate, May 15, 1991 Two In A Bed: SleeningOfYour Together For 'The Rest Life He snores. She steals the covers. He likes the window open. She likes the , electric blanket on high" He tosses and turns. She pushes him to the edge of the bed. He likes to watch TV late into the night. She needs complete darkness and silence to fall asleep. Do these scenarios sound familiar? When couples share a bed, they're forced to try to mesh their own personal sleep styles, which may be quite different. Unless compromises can be worked out, the bed may become a batdeground, putting a strain on the relationship and robbing both patters of the sleep they need. Parallel Sleep Cycles Some sleep experts believe that even the moslcompatible of sleeping couples routinely disturb their partner's sleep. Dr. J. Allen Hobson, a researcher in neurophysiology at Harvard Medical School, discovered a remarkable degree of synchrony in movement and immobility in sleeping couples, which he says gives new meaning to the term "sleeping together." , "If one tends to go to sleep more quickly and the other tosses and turns, the one will be awakened; neither will sleep easily until both do," he notes in his book, Slap. Another study of couples conducted by Dr. Larry Monroe of Ohio State University showed that when sleeping together, they dreamed more (more REM sleep) and had less of the deep delta sleep that is needed for body recovery, according to Dr. Peter Hauri in his book, No More Skeplar 1lygha. "It appears that it takes at least 10 minutes of undisturbed sleep before such deka sleep can develop—and if one partner moves during those 10 minutes and disturbs the other, the dock apparently is set back to zero and the 10 minutes have to scan all over again; says Hauri, director of the May Clinic Insomnia Program and co-director of the clinics Sleep Disorders Center. Gender Differences Research also shows that sleeping together may be harder on women, who typically have shorter periods of deep (non-REM) sleep than their sleep partners. The man may be the cause, perhaps because he is more likely than his matt to snore, and she is more easily awakened by noise and other stimuli. In her book, The Complea Boat of Step, author Dianne Hales notes that men are also prone to sleep disorders that involve major body movements, such as uncontrollable leg twitches or kicks.. "Or it may be a case of one matt putting weight on the other,' says Hales. Each time the man rolls over, his movement may jar the woman, perhaps not to the point of waking her, but she may go into a lighter sleep stage. If there's a difference of more than 50 pounds in eight, the woman may find herself s iding into a 'trough' in the mattress, which forms as her bedmate shifts his weight." One sleep researcher found that c3ch time one person in a double bed moves, the other moves within 20 seconds. Room To Move One obvious solution that never occurs to some couples is to buy a bigger bed. In a full-size double bed, each partner has only as much width as in a baby's crib— hardly enough room in which to move about freely without disturbing the other. A queen -size set offers six more inches of width; a king-size gives 22 more inches, as well as additional length. If your bed is 8-10 years old, it no longer provides the comfort and support you need, and should be considered for retirement. Thais an ideal time for you to consider moving up to a larger size. When you do decide that it's time for a new bed, be sure to shop together. Lie down in your normal sleeping positions on several sets to find one that feels right to both of you. If you simply can't avec, you may want to buy two twin size bcds fastened to a king-size headboard. That way, you can each choose the set that suits you, and still be able CO cuddle up when you want to. ResolvingNightly Skirmishes Once you've eliminated the bed as the source of your problems, figure out ways to compromise sleep habits and rituals that are not compatible with your mates. Begin with an honest talk about your nighttime differences (including things that may have bothered you for years), and work out a peace treaty you both can live with. For example, if your partner needs complete quiet and/or darkness for sleep, you might try reading with a high-intensity reading light, or using television earphones. Your bcdmace could try eyeshades, ear- plugs, or other noise -masking devices, such as "white -noise" machines. If your tossing and turning keeps your mate awake, go to another bed for the night. Don't insist on the same bedtime if your biological clocks differ widely—it is guaranteed to cause insomnia for the partner who needs less sleep. Sleep Happily Everflfter When two people sleep together, they share an important, intimate part of each other's life. Their nights affect their days together, and vice versa. It has been shown, for example, that the sleep positions a couple assumes at the start of the night may mirror their relationship. New lovers may sleep curled up together like spoons, and older marrieds may sleep back-to-back, not touching ac all. By the same token, nighttime discord created by sleep -style incompatibility is likely to be reflected in your. daily interactions.• trtilegg� N RESTO TRUCKLOAI% MATTRESP SAL w RFSTONIC® BEDDING ATA TAKE HOME SALE PRICE! 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