HomeMy WebLinkAboutTimes Advocate, 1991-01-02, Page 4.Y
Page 4 Times -Advocate, January 2, 1991
Publisher: Jim Beckett
News Editor: Adrian Harte
Business Manager. Don Smith
Composition Manager. Deb Lord
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"Men are never so likely
to settle a question rightly
as when they dlkcuss it
freely."
Thomas Macauley
l:lli"l.OR .\LS
Don't expect too much
t has been a while since a New
.Year has appeared so grim in
its initial outlook.
New Year 1990 seemed to hold such
good news. Only a few weeks earlier a
hole through Berlin Wall signalled a
new era for European stability. Indeed, •
Germany did unite last summer and the
world appeared to be genuinely making
progress towards an era of sanity and
peace.
Only a few days later that dream was
shattered as Saddam Hussein decided
to expand the borders of Iraq into Ku-
wait. No one is mincing any words
about what the first few weeks of 1991
hold for the world: outright war is all
anyone is calling it.
The warmongers at the Pentagon rub
their hands in glee at finding them-
selves back in the driver's seat. They
will now get a chance to test all that
high-tech hardware theyve built up
oyer the years, and have excuse to
build _More when it's all over.
The rest of the us can shake our heads
sadly, wondering at what will be sacri-
ficed and wasted on the sands of the
middle east this year - although no sane
alternatiye is forthcoming. If . Hussein's
aspirations are not clipped back bluntly
and quickly, the whole gulfcrisis has
the potential to get worse, much worse
if United Nations support erodes.
Even if you can ignore the events in
the Persian 'Gulf, things tddn't look that
;much better here at home. .
The Goods and Services Tax is obvi-
ously going to take a bigger bite out of
the Canadian income than the govern-
ment is pretending. Those of us waiting
to see prices drop as the big bad evil
Federal Sales Tax is. eliminated are go-
ing to find that it didn't apply to nearly
as many things as we thought and that it
was charged on the wholesale cost of an
item. The GST will apply to the full re-
tail price. ,
Rumour has it that 1991\ Canadians
will live in the third highest taxed nation
in the world.
In 1990, Meech Lake failed, as it
should. In most parts of the world, pro-
vincialism is used as a dirty word in po-
litical circles. In Canada, our govern-
ment actively pursues it. Predictably,
our regions are so divisive that they
wouldn't even approve an accord that 'of-
fered them more power than ever before.
And Oka. We're not .going to see the
end of that one for quite a while. ,
The gloom of recession, while real, is__
likely not nearly as bad as most of the
media portray it. Economic downturns
are common and survivable.
So what can we say about 1991 that of-
fers us any light at the end of the tunnel?
Not much, which in itself is perhaps
something of a blessing. While we had
high hopes for 1990 and were left some-
what disappointed, we can take the op-
posite approach with '91. If we don't set
our hopes too high then maybe we'll get
something brighter than we bargained
for:
A.D.H.
No business like sn
W business
Happy New Year! Before I other snow and ice related activ-
jump into the first column of.2ties $500. Grand total: $2650 a
1991, I must announce the win-
ners of my "perfect spelling"
contest. In November, when I
sent the story "Which Witch is
Which?" to the papers, I issued a
challenge to all typesetters to
produce that tricky column with-
out introducing a single typo.
The prizes (a copy of my latest
book, "Fathering, Mothering
and Kidding") were mailed just
before Christmas to the follow-
ing winners:
Superior Sue (Star & Times,
Swan River, Man.), Competent
Colleen (Review, Foam Lake,
Sask.), Congratulations! And let
your bosses know how perfect
you are.
Now to the sudject at hand
I've often Wondered how
much cheaper we could live in a
more reasonable climate. Why
do we have to freeze in darkness
for one third of the year? Why
do we put up with. snow, this
perennial nuisance? •
Having sweated through our
1991family budget (I'm fore-
casting another record deficit), I
got out my pocket calculator and
did a little figuring. Here's what
the luxury of snow is costing
this particular family of 5 (all ex-
penses are on an annual basis):
St $ ploughing by contrr*tor:
5200; new equipment si h as
shovels and ice picks; 520; chil-
dren's snow suits, snow pants,
. gloves, etc. $350; adults' snow
'v wear $15�, -snow boots: $300;
removing snow and ice From
' roof: $50; snow and i amage
.to roof, paves, troughs etc.:
$100; heating wires.on j in-
cluding electricity 575; extra gas
due fp driving in snow (2 cars):
5250; replacement of windshield
Wipers 515; rust and corrosion
caused byylkaa1t on roads; $500;
/subtotal:'$201 : GST on above:
140; workin time lost because
of -delays,. w shovelling and
year. That's without any unex-
pected problems such as brok-
en bones and nervous break-
downs.
At a 4.5% inflation rate, we
can expect to spend close to
$40,000 in the next 10 years be-
cause of snow. This does not
take into account any voluntary
PETER'S
POINT
•
by
Peter Hessel
snow and ice related activities, ;
such''as downhill and cross
country skiing, tobogganing,
outdoor skating, etc. We need
these to survive (we tell our-
selves). Of course, we can't af-
ford them. But how boring life
would be if we did only what
we can afford!
Let's figiNconsider these
$40,000 worth of necessary ex-
penses. If instead of throwing
them away because of snow,
we could invest them in Canada
Savings Bonds, we'd stand to
double our money in 10 years.
According to my arithmetic, this
means a total loss of 580,000.
No wonder there is a mass exo-
dus from Canada to Florid* and
Califomia.
. So why do we stay? Because
• we're a bunch of masochists.
We love suffering physical
pain, emotibnal stress and
nancial damage. Instead of flee-
ing from these inhospitable.
practically uninhabitable subarc-
tic regions, we tell ourselves
end each other that we Ilkt
snow.
Life could be easy and so
_ cheap. Just imagine living in the
tropics! All you'd need is two
pairs of shorts and a couple of T-
shirts. No heating bills. No
snow blowers. No felt -lined
boots. Not a parka within a thou-
sand miles. Just heart-warming
sunshine, crimson hibiscus, bar-
becued steaks, refreshing drinks,
and tanned bodies with happy
smiles on their faces all year
round.
Forgive me. I am dreaming. Of
course, we must stay where we
are. It's our duty. It's our desti-
ny to battle the elements. This is
the true north, strong and often
partially freeat least to a certain'
extent - GST, federal debt, bu-
reaucracy and bad govemment
notwithstanding. If we didn't
stay here in and hack it in the
snow, who would? '
Voltaire said in 1759, when the
British and French were, having
it But on the Plains of Abraham:
"You know that these nations
have been at war over a few
acres of snow, and that they are
spending on this fine struggle
more than Canada itself is
worth."
And the US poet Carl Sand -
burg observed in 1928:
"If two Canadians understand
new, they are then both Canadi-
ans. If one Canadian under-
stands snow and another Canadi-
an doesn't undo land snow at
all, then one is a Canadian, and
the other is no Canadian at all."
Well, I consider myself very,
very Canadian indeed. And I un-
derstand snv perfectly. I know
what it does to me and what it
prevents me from do g. I even
like snow for a brief period. I
wish it would drop in for a visit
'the week before Christmas and
'drop at the end of January.
To be . . aced by what the Euro -
peens call pm -spring.
1 hope 1 haven't offended 100
many snow lovers out there. My
own family included. Don't wor-
ery. Next week's topic; Snow
Forts.
IT5 MIDNISf.-
1YE SlAIVED
1990!
PSK
N
1 resolve to ... Nah!
Well this.year I'm going all out.
- I resolve to quit smoking, start
exercising and lose 20 lbs.
Nah!
Infamous' and tiresomo New
Year's resolutions have been
broken for as long as they have
been around - so, why bother?
Well because they are fun and
a bit of chgenge.I must say, es-
pecially vAilen you tell your co-
workers about your resolutions
or worse yet make bets on your
own success.
"Aha! Smoking I see - $50,,
please!"
I pondered several ideas while
the ball dropped at Times
Square in the last minutes of
1990, but most of them were ec-
onomics related like - quit going
out to eat to save on the GST -
quit travelling so much to save
on the qST and keep sending
my GST "rebate" cheques back
to the government to let them.
know what I think of the GST.
Say
what?
B
Cheryl
By
Clark
But, that was common sense
and as I flicked my Bic I real-
ized - smoking is a major cause
of fund deficiency in my bank
account.
With a deep breath of 1991 air
- I . pondered the possibilities -
did 1 reallywant to quit? why
should 1 when I do in fact enjoy
smoking? and what is the latest
price for a 15 -pack?
But oo wait! Common sense
dictates that when an inanimate
object (for example - the Prime
Minister) stands in your way of
financial happiness something
must be done.
So, I stubbed out my last cig-
arette and wondered one last
time if I had quit because I
wanted to or because the federal
government had taxed me into
it.
I know the answer - but I am
going to try and quit smoking
anyway. So there.
The T -A French bureau
Greetings from the land of
endless bottles of wines, loaves
upon loaves of bread, cafes, cha-
teaux, and poodles. Three
months have quickly slipped by,
and I can confidently say that
I've successfully integrated my-
self into the French 'culture.
Well, almost., • • ,
At least I knothat 1 hove be-
come m ch more open-minded
through t my stay. For exam-
ple,' I o have two meals a
week with my host -family, but
when they discover that I'm eat-
ing with them that night, they
begin concocting ancient French
cuisine that I'm sure no one eats
in real life.
A couple days ago while I was
preparing my su r (soup and
grilled cheese andw%hes), the
aroma of a norm chicken mast.
was escaping the stove. Howev-
er, the following day, the night
to eat., with the Moulinier's, we
had cow's tongue. Tonight we're
,supposed to be having a "meat"
that looks like sausage but is
comprised of 90 percent pig
blood and. 10 percent water.
'Can'twait!
Fluency in the language hasn't
miraculously occurred, but I
have reached the stage where I
am able to express complete
•
•
thoughts and understand most of
what is being said behind my
back. I no longer feel ripped -off
when going to the cinema or
when renting a mbvie because I
can now understand the plots
(by the, way, "Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles" arrived last
Week). I was also able to de-
scribe a hairstyle to a "coif-
feuse" and leave the shop with-
out a bag over my head. My
latest language accomplishment
was explaining to a French
woman how the clothes dryers
at the laundromat operate...
I have finally ac
that I am basically a •
with which my Fren
can impress guests.
ment, my "parents"
joy is the new bath
been installed next
Mom. Visitors are d
,three flights of stairs
the fact
wpieoe
family
the mo -
pride and
thlit aft
r h
ed
i•
,a
good look at "l'Americaine" and
then the "salle de bain". (At least
I rank, higher than bathroom fix-
tures).
I could write pages on experi-
ences and impressions that I
have had over these past three
months in Nantes, Fra'thce. Per-
haps I'll conch de with a few
"facts" about France (as seen by
Rhonda):
• every older woman owns a
mutt which she carries into res-
taurants, perfumeries, art mu-
seums, etc.
▪ 95 percent Of college s4r-
dents smoke, and it's no surpiW
to see 10 year olds lighting up.
• clothing fads are important to
follow. For winter, 75 percent of
the population own brown
scarves with a black, white and
red plaid print.
• a stronger sense of sexism
exists in comparison to North
America. They don't think twice
about having naked women ad-
vertise yogurt, or showing a
"playboy" program at 10:00
p'•m.
• 400 cafes exist in Nantes (ac-
tually a Dict)'
• .The Theneh aren't stuck-up
snobs. They ate friendly, always
helpful, and willing to share
the lture with others.