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Times -Advocate, December 6, 1989
Times Established 1873
Advocate Established 1881
Amalgamated 1924
Published Each Wednesday Morning at Exeter, Ontario, NOM 1S0
Second Class Mail Registration Number 0386.
/ — Phone 519.235.1331
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ROSS HAUGH • JIM BECKETT
Editor • Publisher & Adsertising Manager
HARR', DEVRIES CION SMITH .
CoMposition Manager Business Manager
SUBSCRIPTION RATES:
Canada: $27.00 Per year; U.S.A. $68.00
What's the big deal?
t made .great headlines for a
week and was great fodder for
irate Opposition party spokes-
man but (you'll excuse the pun), stripped
of the rhetoric the great strip club. scan-
dalwas greatly overblown, according to
The Citizen, Blyth.
The .issue of the Federal Business De-
velopment (FBDB) loaning money to
several establishments that later turned
out to be strip clubs had something for
everybody the opposition parties could
have tried to please. Those who see the
government as being one big waster of
money could get their worst fears con-
firmed by seeing millions of taxpayer
dollars going to finance these , sleazy
businesses. People of a religious back-
ground could -get upset •of the decline of
morality that sees the government fund-
ing dens of sin. Supporters of the wom-
en's movement (no, not women's move-
ments you chauvinist) could be insulted -
at the government seeming to give ap-
proval to the degradation of women.
And all these groups, and the opposi-
tion and the newspaper editorialists
would be right. It's a little silly to be us-
ing government_ money to help get busi-
nesses started that we may not be too
proud to have in 'our communities in the
long run.
But it's easy to point out these FBDB
loans for scorn. It's easy to see the unde-
sirability of these businesses. How many
other government -backed loans have
gone to support businesses that may be
doing a lot more harm than putting
naked women on display in front of sla-
vering. male customers? How many gov-
ernment dollars have been used .over the
years to fuild pulp and paper mills that
spewed millions of f gallons of pollutants
into our waters? How many chemical
plants have received government aid,
then left toxic waste dumps around to
leak into the water system? How many
other companies getting loans today are
still doing things that threaten the -future
of. our planet, not just the virtue of the
men and women who attend these sleazy
night spots. If the opposition and the
• media really, want scandal, let them dig a
little deeper and see where money has
'really•been used in a harmful way.
HAVE AN OPINION?
The Times Advocate welcomes letters to the editor. They must be signed and should
be accompanied by a telephone number and address should we need to clarify any
information. The newspaper also reserves the right to edit letters.
Letters can be dropped off at the Times Advocate Office or mailed to:
Exeter Times Advocate
Box 850, Exeter, Ontario
NOM 1S6
Cecil and the pistachio
We can't have a dog or cat, be-
cause Alexander is allergic to
them. As a result, mice from all
over the township migrate to our
house, to make it their home.
They're cute little rodents, and
I might tolerate them if I lived
here alone. But Elizabeth com-
plains when the mice eat more
flour or cereal than we do. And
the exchange goods they leave
behind have no commercial val-
ue whatever.
So I set my traps. Actually one
trap is all I need on an average
day. I have trained the mice to
be (ex)terminated in the base-
ment fruit room, up 'on a ledge,
where it is practical for mc. Usu-
ally they cooperate. Once in a
while I encounter a mousetrap
engineer, one with either a talent
or an education.
I lack experience as a mouse
sexer. So 1 imitate the folks re-
sponsible .for hurricane: I alter-
nate between boys' and girls'
names, beginning with the first
mouse caught every month. The
first December mouse was An-
gus, the second Bertha. This is
the story of Cecil, the mousetrap
engineer.
After 1 removed Bertha (an
easy catch), I baited the trap as
usual: a bit of Kraft peanut but-
ter on' and under the lure plate.
When I checked on Sunday
moming (after breakfast), I
found thc peanut butter was
gone. 'Another one of those," I
grumbled, and reset the trap. Us-
ing a flick my father-in-law
taught me, I pushed an almond
sliver right inside the hollow un-
der the lure plate. Then I re-
placed the peanut butter, and set
the guillotine with only a milli-
meter's worth of play.
When I checked on Monday
morning, I could hardly believe
my eyes. Cecil had licked• the
plate clean and managed to pull
out the almond without spring
the trap.
•
Extriordinery mice call for ex-
traordinary measures. I tightly
jammed another piece of almond
into the hollow from the left,
and a half a raisin from the tight.
I covered everything with an un-
usually generous amount of
creamy peanut butter. Then I set
the guillotine with such preci-
sion that a falling hair would
have triggered it.
I couldn't wait to meet Cecil. I
have a lot of respect for mice
that manage to escape more than
once. Clearly, Cecil was a pro.
1 don't usually check my traps
in the daytime. Mice work hard
all night, and they need their rest
when the scant daylight filters
through the basement windows.
But J was curious to see just
how greedy an individual I was
dealing with. I found the trap'on
the floor. Sprung. Minus peanut
butter, almond and raisin. No
sign of Cecil, who was probably
watching me from a crack in the
wall, snickering.
To make matters worse, Eliza-
beth informed me that "the
mice" had gnawed a hole into a
bag of flour in the pantry, as
well as leaving "evidence" on
the kitchen counter. This was
war. I h'ad to show Cecil (and
Elizabeth) who was master of
the house.
I repeated the procedure of the
morning, this time using a piece
of pistachio instead of almond. I
spread peanut butter all over the
trap - lure plate, spring, wooden
base, everything. Trying to set
the guillotine, I almost lost a fin-
ger, when it closed on me. Too
much weight on the plate. I tried
two or three more times and fi-
nally adjusted the deadly con-
traption to zero tolerance.
I also figured that Cecil must
be putting on weight from all the
good food he (or she?) was get-
ting. I checked again in the eve-
ning: everything was as I had
left it. Cecil was either asleep or
just not hungry. Or maybe he
had died of natural causes - like
overeating.
Tuesday moming I went into
the .fruit room before breakfast.
There on the floor, under the
trap, I spotted Cecil's white bel-
ly. I turned the trap over. Before
being clobbered, Cecil had eaten
all the peanut butter and suc-
cessfully extracted the pistachio
as well as the raisin.
"I'm sorry I had to do this. Ce-
cil," I said. "Using a pistachio is
not really playing the game. You
were a clever mouse, a credit to
your species." I refused to dis-
pose of Cecil in the same gar-
bage can where Angus and Ber-
tha were awaiting interment. I
took the spade and gave him a
decent burial under the big
spruce tree.
"Rest in peace, Cecil," I said.
"You were a lot of trouble, but
you did what you had td do."
And I set the trap for Doris.
Serving South Huron, North Middlesex
& North Lambton Since 1373
Published by I.W. Eedy Publications limited
Worth a lot
A recent article in the Toronto
Star reminded us of information
we gained during this past sum-
mer's trip to Eastern Canada.
While on a four hour trip of St.
John, New Brunswick, the bus
driver seemed to delight` in
pointing out the many service
stations, oil refineries, pulp mills
and a shipyard owned by one
family.
He was referring to K.C. Ir-
ving, the owner of much of New
Brunswick who was recently
listed in Forbes magazine as the
fourth richest man in the world.
He is reputed to be worth about
$9.35 billion.
Irving is a very influential
man. New Brunswick residents
buy gasoline from Irving service
stations, gasoline that came
from Irving refineries. They are
employed in Irving pulp mills,
paper mills, sawmills and steel-
works.
Tliey look on as new naval
frigates are constructed in Irving.
shipyards. They learn of many
of the family afairs through Ir-
vint-owned newspapers and tele-
vision and radio stations.
Despite all of this, Irving
doesn't always get what he
wants.
Recently, the -New Brunswick
Motor Carrier Board turned
down his two sons, who now op-
erate the Irving empire when
one of their trucking companies
applied for a new business li-
cence.
The hearing was held to con-
sider an application from an Ir-
ving trucking company, named
Sunbury Transport for an unre-
stricted trucking licence. Cur-
rently, Sunbury can only carry
forest products and construction
From the
editor's disk
by
Ross Haugh 113
materials.
Midland Transport, another Ir-
ving company is licensed to car-
ry all cargo.
Sunbury's try for an unrestrict-
ed
nrestricted licence brought cries of foul
from other truckers, claiming
they would face unfair competi-
tion.
They argued that Irving truck-
ing companies carry all of Ir-
ving's very considerable freight.
Non -Irving truckers are seldom,
if ever allowed to try for this
business. Independent compa-
nies are left to compete only for
non -Irving business.
Testimony before the board re-
vealed that Irving -owned com-
panies shipping forest products
or construction materials,' pay
very high rates to Irving -owned
transport companies.
Because they charge high rates
for their own freight, Irving
trucks can handle non -Irving
freight for very low rates. That
gives tham a big advantage over
smaller companies.
While the carrier board accept-
ed the fact Irving companies do
pay "artificially high" rates to
Sunbury, they stressed there was
nothing wrong with the practice.
But, they ruled that granting
an expanded licence to Sunbury
would "likely result in abuse of
market power," lessen competi-
tion and would not be in the
public interest. The application
was refused.
How do the Irvings escape the
damage of paying high rates to
their own truckers?
That's easy. Federal taxpayers
pay a subsidy on freight shipped
out of the Atlantic region to cen-
tral Canada and it amounts to 30
percent of the cost of trucking
goods from their point of origin
to Levis, across the St. Law-
rence River from Quebec City.
For finished goods, the subsidy
is 50 percent.
The two Irving trucking firms,
Sunbury and Midland received
$4.6 million in federal subsidies
for the year ending March 31,
1988. That was the second high-
est total in the region.
Who was the highest? A truck-
ing firm named Day and Ross
collected over $5.3 million. Day
and Ross is owned by another
nice little family business mak-
ing french fries and other foods.
That's right, the name is
McCain.
Thought of the Week: It's
much better to give than receive
- and it's also deductible.
Oh no... it's my dad
• You can never tell how par-
ents are going to grow up.
My mom and dad seemed to
be doing well. All the positive
signs of a normal adjustment to
middle age were there.
Once upon a time, their idea of
a vacation was a leisurely drive
through the middle of Malaya.
Now that they've grown up, they
prefer large hotels on tropical
beaches where natives provide
continuous food and entertain-
ment. • '
Dad began to get the urge to
give up family sedans for a two-
seater sports car with pop-up
headlights. He finally found one
to his liking.
It all seemed perfectly normal.
So where did I go wrong?
Following in my grandfather's
footsteps, Dad joined the church
choir, then graduated to one of
those "ethnic" singing groups. It
didn't matter that Dad had only
lived a few months in Wales; he
liked thc music and enjoyed.
singing.
Then I made my fatal mistake.
You sec, I was electedpublicity
director for the university Gil-
bert and Sullivan society. De-
spite my ability to really mess
things up, the show came off
well. I innocently got tickets for
my family, not realizing Dad
would become so interested' in
operettas he would audition for
the next year's show, The Mika-
do.
There he was, on stage, wear-
ing make-up and outrageous
costumes, singing and dancing
Hold that
thought...
By
Adrian Harte
for not one, but four consecutive
years with the Gilbert and Sulli-
van Society.
I had to suffer the embarrass-
ment of my dad becoming a
theatre junkie. It would prob-
ably be easier to tell people my
father was an escaped convict or
a Conservative MP than to con-
fess "Yes, that's my dad up
there: the one with the wings."
Could it get any worse? Yes,
it could.
Last summer, Dad took classes
to learn about tapdancing. This
was way beyond belief, but it'
seemed he was determined to
audition for the London Musical
Theatre's production of 42nd
Street. Somehow, he learned
thc steps and joined the chorus
line. If you saw the show two
weeks ago, there he was, my
dad, on stagc in Centennial Hall.
There I was, -shaking my head,
wondering if I was being filmed
for the next episode of The Twi-
light Zone.
I'm proud of my Dad and his
newly -discovered talents, but I
just. can't believe it's really him
on stage, especially since with
all that make-up on, he could
pass for my younger brother (I
don't have any brothers). Dad
is, however, not as old as most
of the Rolling Stones, leaving
me worried about what he might
try out for when he gets tired of
Broadway musicals.
Naturally, I have some fun
when .1 go backstage after a
show. Some cast menibers ask
who I -am, so I tell them I'm Der-
ek's son. Thcy never seem to
believe me, so I tell them my
dad looks'youngerthan his 60
years, which completely bewil-
ders them.
He's nowhere near 60 of
course, but theatre people have a
hard time separating reality from
fantasy anyway.
What Dad has in mind next, I
can't imagine, but I don't know
whether I'm more worried about
him, or what is going to happen
to me when I eventually grow
up.