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Times-Advocate, 1982-04-07, Page 84 • Page 8 Times -Advocate, April 7, 1952 .. . Wif. battoring is reaching epidemic proportlons conf•ri sspoaK•rs II Wife battering is a serious, epidemic problem that police, courts and other members of society must denounce and try to resolve. It is estimated that 500,000 women in Canada - or 1 in 10 - are battered by their husbands or live in lovers each year. Statistics Canada says that almost 20 percent of murders involve husbands killing their wives. Theseare some of the startling facts that several women from the Huron County group Women Today faced at the conference nee e anee e a m "Wife Battering: and Routes to Solutions." They were among 900 police, social workers and con- cerned individuals who met at the University of Western Ontario on Friday to examine why men beat women and what can be done to stop it. Women who have sought refuge for themselves and their children at one of the 11 interval houses in Ontario often are seeking help for their husbands as well. It is hard to convince the husband that he has a problem and SURPRISE SALE April Rth 6 P.M. - 10 P.M. Check out our IN STORE SPECIALS Shady X2est Antiques 8 Collecfables 506 Main St., Exeter 235-0299 SURPRISE SAVINGS ON ALL YOUR FASHION NEEDS One Night Only THURS., APRIL 8 6:00 to 10:00 p.m. 20% Off EVERYTHING IN THE STORE Plus Some Extra Specials At Even Bigger Discounts Now Open Friday Nights until 9:00 p.m. And Wednesday Mornings until 12:00 oyl e's Ladies' Wear MAIN ST. EXETER difficult to find professionals skilled at dealing with this kind of violence. Steve Everett, organiser of Stop Abuse by Men, a self- help program in the Chicago area and himself a former batterer explained that most men deny that they batter. He couldn't imagine himself fitting into the stereotype he had of an abuser: an unemployed, uneducated alcoholic man. When he realized that It was the stereotype that was wrong he was able to admit that he was an abuser. Once he accepted that he needed help he had difficulty finding it. It was by talking to other men who were violent and were willing to discuss their feeling and emotions that he was able to change. "An important part of changing and ending my battering in my family was exploring, learning and naming my feelings during before and after battering." Everett went on to em- phasize that wife battering is only one symptom of many ways men are violent to women including rape, in- cest, sexual harrassment, verbal assault and por- nography. London lawyer and feminist Connie Backhouse labeled the same list as a spectrumof violence against women. She stated that it is the same violence being manifested in a number of ways. As the women's movement identifies these various forms of violence the ame sets of myths and the ame sets of data are merging. Backhouse says there are myths that wife battering is of a widespread problem; hat only small, fragile, nemployed, immigrant, poor women are beaten; that en who beat their wives re alcoholic and unem- loyed; that somehow the ife is to blame and that beatings are of a minor ature. However, she said, bat - ring is in epidemic roportions and includes ctims and abusers of all ocial classes, ages and ligions. She dismissed the ea that women are to ame., What that really eans isthat people think omen like to be beaten, that y expreience some kind of easure akin_ to sexual easure from it. This is solutely, totally absurd." These beatings are not nor. Over one third of the ses require medical atment. The beatings can calate to murder. Inspector John Robinson the London police force d that it is wrong to label ily related assault as mestic". This leads to s s e n u m a p w n to p vi s re id bl m the pl p1 ab mi ca tre es of sai fam "do the attitude that it is dif- ferent from other assault and is less serious. He also mentioned that more police are injured or killed during these family disputes than in any other police work. That there is a double standard for assault was also the concern of Judge Maurice Geneat of London Family court. He said "an assault against a wife should not be treated differently than an assault between two men on Dundas Street." He continued on to say that we should act more responsibly about this violence since "an assault against any one woman is an assault against all women." Donnie Patterson, a representative ,of the women's program con- sultant in British Columbia and a victim, stressed that when women reach out for help the community must be there with help in the form of shelters, money, daycare and counselling. But moreover we need transitlon houses for men because "wife battering is not a women's issue, it is a men's issue." We must stop blaming women for their victimization. There were many solutions offered and demanded by those at the conference. Connie Backhouse suggested a 115 tax be levied on aU marriage licenses raisingbe used dollars million financehelters for abused women. Steven Everett stressed the need for community education of the realities and scope of the problem. He M hoped that boys and men could be encouraged to be open about their feelings and emotions in non-violent ways. Donnie Patterson feels that violence is so engrained in our society that we really CASH REGISTER TAPE DONATION from HowardHoltzmann ofthe as treasurer of the South Huron hospital equipment. ASH — Mrs. Ado Dinney foodmarket. Mrs. Dinney Hospital Ladies Auxiliary. accepts a cheque for $200 accepted the cheque The money will go towards gettatdi SING ME 370 Main Street EXETER, ONTARIO Phone 235-2162 need a revolution in our attitudes toward it. "Wouldn't it be nice If all the women and children had the services they need and the military had to put on a bake sale to get a bomb?" The next meeting of Women Today will be held April 27 at Central Huron Secondary School, Clinton, Room 123 at 7:30 p.m. VM2s paepq6 397 Main Street Exeter 235-1113 Surprise. sale all day Thursday 9 to 9 Infants to Size 14 20% OFF All Clothing (Not including hand made articles or diapers) • SURPRIS SAL Surprise Sale SPECIAL Don't miss our special rack of fall and winter items at savings of 50% and more CONGRATULATIONS TO OUR ANNIVERSARY DRAW WINNERS Elizabeth Lang, Kirkton Sport Rite 2 pc. suit Toni Berendsen RR 1 Kirkton g,,kin, good FASHIONS FOR HER 375 Main Streit, Exeter 235-2460 OFF EVERYTHING IN THE STORE EXCEPT BASICS WHICH ARE 10% OFF .11P• IIP-•• 4- - -. • 6 - 10 P.m.THURS •r 1 1