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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron Expositor, 1996-05-15, Page 6Opinion ............ Tourists ask the strangest questions Yes, the tourist season :� the tourist is upon us, the time of year our American neighbours drive north to enjoy our recreational playgrounds and marvel at our richly historical I sites while we hammer 'em six bucks a beer. ' "Yes sir, I know you can buy six bottles of beer for that price back home, but your beer would taste pretty cheap alongside this eight dollar and fifty cent hot dog!" In the coming months, millions of tourists will converge on Niagara Falls, asking millions of questions of the staff at hotels,' restaurants and three information centres. Most of the questions tourists ask are relevant and intelligent, like: "If you have daredevil's shooting the falls at death -defying odds and a casino on the way - will we years when Mike Harris is be able to bet on these guys?" finished restructuring No one knows what kind of Ontario. questions this season's Q:Where is Miniature tourists will be asking, but if World? last summer is any indication, A: It's been moved to at least one of the Niagara Europe. Parks Commission booths Q Is that far from here? should be designated the A: Well that depends. Are• Strange, Information Centre. you walking or on foot? Here are but a few of the Q: At Marineland, do you questions' tourists asked the parks staff at the Information Centres last summer and the , answers I imagine they wished they could have given. Q: What is this Niagara Splash Aero Car? . A: The Niagara Spanish Aero Car is a gondola type A: Well that's three celsius � Q: Do you serve breakfast? William miles, so you double it and . A: Well our main job here at add thirty. It's about 36 the Information Centre is to minutes in either a slow car give directions, advice, or fast sneakers. information, that kind of Q: (A woman calling from stuff. But we'll be glad to Toronto) 1 am in Toronto and whip something up for you as would like to come to long as you're not diabetic or Niagara Falls, is there anyone Jewish or something like that. there who could come and Q: Will my contacts fall out pick me up? if I go on the Journey Behind A: Hell yes, the mayor's not the Falls? doing anything. Hold on... A: No, but unless you stop Wayne? Got a live one in looking at Trixy over there, Toronto. Sounds like she they'll be popping out with might be a gambler. your sockets! Thanks... okay lady, he'll be Please, be kind to tourists right there! for they know not what they Q: When the Maid of the speak. Mist goes under the falls, doesn't the water sink the boat? A: Quite often this does happen which is why we recommend that you buy a one-way ticket. Q: Can you tell me where I can see the seven Wonders of the World? A: Well you could start at the Pyramids in Egypt and work your way to the Hanging Gardens in Ancient Babylon but just a second... this is "Trixy The Twisted Lap Dancer"... she's from the Sundowner... all she needs is ten bucks and a picnic table. Q: Does the goat ta• ke us back to the parking lot? We parked, across the street. A: No problem. Just tell the captain where you're parked, when you get on board. If you can stand the scraping noise,its okay with him. Q: Can I get any information here? A: Here, no. This is the Information Centre.. For information you'll have to , swim'out to the Old Scow That's grounded just at the brink of the falls. Sting lots of change, it's completely automated. Thomas A: I believe you're looking for Miniature World which is no longer here. If you do in fact want to see a Third World, come back in three see real whales or do you just get to watch them on a big screen? . A: Both. During the day you can see whales in the pool and at night, for instance, you could watch the Whalers play the Penguins on the big screen. Q: Where can I buy a ride that traverses'the Mighty casket? (Honest. Somebody Niagara River, 250 feet above asked that question at the the churning Whirlpool Information Centre). Rapids. In the unlikely event A: Arc you with the guy that you hear a splash while whb's planning to ride on the you're on that ride, repeat Niagara Splash Aero Car? after me: "In they name of the Q: How'far is the Aero Car? -Father, the Son and the Holy A: Three miles down the Spirit..." Parkway. , Q:.How can I find the Third Q: Is that three miles , World? , , wulking or by car? Asthma can be frightening Dear Editor, • - • grams in Huron and Perth There is perhaps nothing., Counties, such as the Air more frightening !Or a parent Force Family Asthma than to watch their child Program, in-service educa- struggle for breath. yet this ' tion sessions for teachers, can he a reality for, parents of ,Asthma Awareness evenings the approximately 10 per cent and workshops for asthmatic of Canadian children who teens. With education, asth- suffer from asthma. matics and their families and April and May mark The caregivers are better able to Lung Association's loth manage and cope with this annual Asthma Appeal. The •disease. goal ,of this direct mail cam -When you see a group of paign is to raise .loth aware school children at play, 'nese •and funds to continue remember that one in every supporting medical research ten suffers from asthma. Your and community asthma pro- support of The Lung grams. Asthma affect s one in' Associatipn's 1996 Asthma ten Canadian children and six Appeal will help'those chil- per cent of the adult papula dren, as well as the many tion. It is the principle cause adult asthmatics, 'breathe a of school absences -due to little more easily. Thank you chronic illness and the lead- for your support. ing cause of hospital admis- sions among preschoolers: Funds raised through the Asthma Appeal support pro - 'Sincerely, Velma Hansford, Volunteer President, . the Lung Association, Huron -Perth Counties Beware of phone solicitors Dear Editor. They keep telling us 'buyer beware,' but that phone solkc- itor is smooth and comes up with a,ncw angle. My conversation began with, "This is a mini -survey - do you have . allergies?" Usually at this point, I say I'm not interested and hang up. I was (caught) interested in hearing about allergies.. After a -few questions about my environment, the last • question was, "How old is your vacuum cleaner?" • I was taken in. We don't need this kind of marketing. E. Brown Seaforth J Glassier PHYSIOTHERAPY CLINIC REHAE3ILITATION and INJURY TREATMENT CENTf1E We Work on the Pain — Sn you Stay in the Game. 3 PATRICK ST. W., BOX 338 WiNGHAM, ONTARIO NIG 2W0 519-357-1383 CONGRATULATIONS TO THE WINNER... Shirley Snell of RR 1 Dublin was the winner of the BIA, "Mother's Day in Heaven" Contest. THANK YOU The Seaforth Business Improvement Association thanks you, for shopping in Seaforth. Also thanks to the following businesses for their participation. Future's Hair Design t3oussey's Beauty Boutique Christine's Cafe Total image 11 Keallttgs Pharmacy Sills Hardware Seaforth Jewellers Stedman's Cardno's Men's Wear Pete's Pape Clip Hildebrand Flowers The Bistro Restaurant Wilson's Auto Service Tasty -Nu Bakery Anna's Dress Shop Something for Everyone Shinen's Wuerth's Shoes M GRCA►O� INSURANCE BROKERS Allan Carter, Broker • Home • Auto • Commercial • Farm 522-0399 Seaforth 1-800-265-0959 Strathroy THE HURON EXPOSITOR, may 15, 1 tISS-s HOMEtown 'Internet cAFE COMMUNITY NETWORK r10MEto n Commurvty Network Inc •An opportunity to learn about & use the interne( Thursday May 23 7 to 9 pm at Learning Resources Centre 163 Princess St., E. Clinton (located at Central Huron Secondary School) FREE DRAW FOR A HOMETOWN MEMBERSHIP 519-660-6657 Victoria Day "Weekend Spec' Rhubarb -Strawberry Pie $3,49 8' Baguettes "Alpine or French" 89¢ Havarti "Butter Cheese" $4.9911, 4■99Ib $3■99 Ib. Cheddar "Medium - -Gay-Lea' MAIN ST. SEAFORTH 527-1803 Be Involved! f,DUN Y ON. Remember to attend the workshop on the New County Man at Goderich District Collegiate Institute Wednesday', May 22, 7:00 p.m. - Why Should I Attend? • 1 will be affected by the New County plan because it will 'affect local and County decision making and that will affect me; . - • i want to hear what Huron residents said about 'comnlunity values in the recently completed Community Action Kits; • I want to voice my community issues; • 1 want to influence public policy before it is drafted; I care about the future of my community. For a complete list of workshops being held around the County. please call the Huron County Planning and Development Depanment at 519-5242188. SPRING FOR A CUB CADET 14 HP 12.5 HP CADET SPECIAL ----- '------ CADET TRAILERS LTD 125 12 Hp 38" -- $1949 P •I t 69.00 • (Add for Set -Up CADET CADET 5 HP CADET '100) PUSH MOWERS REAR TINE TILLER ROLLERS 5189. 51,129. 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