HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron Expositor, 1995-07-26, Page 44 -THE HURON IXPO$ITOR, July 20, 1005
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Wednesday, July 26, 1995
Editorial and Business Offices • 100 Main Street.,seaforth
Telephone (519) 527-0240 Fax (519) 527-2858
Mailing Address • P.O. Box 69,
Seaforth, Ontario, NOK IWO
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Editorial
Slim police coverage,
board actions dubious
Acting police chief Brian Sadler made a worrisome revelation
at last week's Seaforth Police Services Board meeting: this town
will have only one police officer on duty at any time for the
remainder of the summer. The "slim coverage," words used by
the acting chief, will be in effect even during the Homecoming
weekend.
The safety of the public and
the officers themselves is in
doubt, especially during the
upcoming reunion. The
Homecoming office hopes
5,000 people will be in town
for the festivities. Alcohol
will be served at many.
events. As we saw recently at
the Goderich Arts and Crafts
Festival, vandalism and other
rough behaviour can accom-
pany large gatherings,
especially when people are
drinking. A visible police
presence deters trouble -makers, and if a raucous does start then
uniformed officers can control it.
The public should also be concerned about the attitude of our
Police Services Board. Although in a public meeting with a
journalist present, they asked that the issue go unreported. Why
did they want to hide the facts? Perhaps the board and the acting
chief anticipated the people of Seaforth would be concerned about
safety with only one officer on duty.
The acting chief also had worthy arguments about why the
coverage level was appropriate. It seems that he and the board do
not trust the people of Seaforth to consider the facts and argu-
ments and make up their minds about whether policing is
adequate. It is patronizing and wrong to make decisions quietly
and out of the public eye. The public pays for police protection.
The public has a right to know what it is getting for its money.
The public also depends on the Police Services Board to defend
its interests. A police force that delivers what is perhaps inad-
equate protection and a board that tries to hide matters of
importance - the people of Seaforth deserve better. -PC
Huron - our 'West Coast'
r(-luron County - Ontario's
West Coast' will soon be
promoted to over 100 minion
potential visitors in over 200
countries around the world,
according to those organizing
the marketing strategy.
The initiative is sponsored by
various area schools, businesses
and' agencies. They will gather
basic information on Huron
County's tourism industry for
future strategies; develop
promotional material on
Huron's tourism assets for
distribution to visitors and tour
operators; and provide local
students with some real-world
experience in the fast growing
information technology sector.
This summer a series of user-
friendly, touch -screen format
kiosks will be placed at
strategic locations throughout
By DAVID SCOTT
Signal -Star Staff
Whosc van is it and who
pays to use it? There was
some concern over thc use of
a new van purchased by
CHuMS (Central Huron
Mobility Service) for the
elderly and physically dis-
abled, and a van used by
Huronview, at thc recent ses-
sion of Huron County
Council.
"We're having trouble get-
ting a definite answer from
our local member of
CHuMS," said Cunningham.
Coun. Bill Clifford, of
Goderich, said,"There is no
charge at this particular time.
the county. They will feature a
listing of all tourist -related
establishments in the region
based on the award-winning
Huron County Travel Guide
format. The kiosks will also
include a survey of users to
gather valuable demographic
information such as the origin
and motivation of the visitor,
primary interests, length of
visit, media awareness, etc.
Four students in an area
multi -media program have been
hired through the support of
the Huron Business
Development Corporation. The
students, using equipment at
the board of education's multi-
media lab, will gain technology
skills by developing
promotional materials for a
range of formats, including
VHS videi, CD-ROM and the
Internet.
However, if it was used for
a personal reason, for example
- a doctor's appointment, there
may be a charge, said
Clifford.
Clerk Lynn Murray said,
"The gift (free use of van) that
you're speaking of was in fact,
from the Huron Adult Dav
Centre, not from Huronview
or the county. The county has
been talking with the CHuMS
people about if there is a way
to use thc Huronview van, to
integrate it in," said Murray.
"We're not subsidized by the
province for the van," she
said. Murray also said they've
always had the option to
charge a fee for use of the
van.
Man discovers wife is male
The dilemma of a married
man in the '90s deepens almost
daily as children turn to crime,
the Internet turns to
pornography and the wife turns
away from you in the shower
so as not to reveal her male
private parts.
Yes, by now you've heard of
a guy named Bruce Jensen
from Bountiful Utah, who says
he feels "pretty stupid" about
discovering that his wife of
three -and -a -half years in fact a
man.
Now the news report I'm
looking at a photograph of
Bruce's 34 -year old wife, Felix
Uroste. Ah Bruce, I have to tell
you, if the first name Felix is
not at least a hint of trouble,
that thick black Fumancho
mustache sets off a little bird
in my brain screaming: DEAD
GIVE-AWAY BILL! DEAD
GIVE-AWAY!
Authorities said that Urioste
got away with the deception
because he looked feminine
and never let Bruce see him
during their marriage. Oddly
enough these were the same
two reasons given by Tom
Arnold on why his marriage to
Roseanne Barr lasted as long
as it did.
Urioste got Bruce to marry
when he (the wife) was
pregnant with his (the
husband's) twins after a single
sexual encounter in 1991, the
likes of which could cause
irreparable harm to your
imagination if you even try to
think about it.
Bruce, 39 -years old, became
even more distressed when he
discoveredhis two children
Tommy and his younger sister
Archie, are in fact, cardboard
cut-outs (Sorry, 1 made that
last part lap.)
Actually, once Felix (the
blushing bride) entrapped
Bruce (the gullible groom) into
marriage, she claimed the twins
were stillborn.
From the conception to the
miracle of birth you've
probably noticed Bruce has
shown an unusual lack of
curiosity, even for a guy..
Bruce is now seeking an
annulment of marriage citing
irreconcilable
similarities...sorry...differences.
I say let them arm wrestle for
the matrimonial property,
provided trained technicians are
standing by to prevent another
unwanted pregnancy.
I think that it is important
that we learn something from
the misadventures of Bruce
and..."Hey honey!?! Did you
talk to the TV repairman about
leaving those empty beer cans
under the couch again?"
Okay. So just in case you
have reason to be skeptical -
here are the 12 sure-fire signs
that your wife might in fact be
a man:
1. You found a sales slip which
shows she exchanged the box
of Turtles you gave her for
Valentine's Day for a box for
Monto Cristos.
flashback
2. She never criticizes your
driving.
3. She says she's going to the,
movies with the girls and asks
to use your catcher's glove and
protective cup.
4. You notice she is always
borrowing your razor and her
legs are always hairy.
5. The last time you both
attended a Stag & Doe party
she wore the antlers.
6. She belches and scratches
herself when your family
comes to dinner. -
7. She yells "Yukkk!" before
you do, when those feminine
hygiene ads come on TV.
8. She inadvertently passed the -
phone to you when the
telemarketer asks to speak to
the "woman of the house."
9. You can't seem to keep a'
box of kleenex in the house
and nobody ever gets colds.
10. She finds a job for you to
do in the garage every time
Baywatch comes on TV.
11. She regularly runs onto
construction sites and kicks the
hell out of the guys who
whistle at her.
And gentlemen, here's where
the little bird in the brain
should start screaming! DEAD
GIVE-AWAY!!!
12. She's never ever nagged
you.
This school photo shows (in front row) Jack Sproat (far
right), Ken Doig (second from right), Rod Doig (fourth from
right), Jack Patrick (sixth from right). Also shown in the
picture are Robert Wallace (third down from top at left of
photo), Doug Wallace (slightly below and to the right of the
teacher), Claire Haney (to the immediate right of teacher),
Eric Doig (in the seat in front of Doug Wallace) and Lloyd
Haney (in the second desk in the far right row). The photo
was graciously lent to The Huron Expositor by Dilys
Finnigan.
Nolans throw a grand party
JULY 26, 1895
Kippen notes: Last week was
a busy time with Mr. T. Mellis
in the twine line. He seems still
to retain his wide reputation for
selling good twine. The fall
wheat harvest is now well
advanced, and the crop is good,
and the husbandmen have
cause to rejoice and be
thankful for the good harvest.
Mr. James McGiven, well
known to many in this part,
had the misfortune to tumble
down the landlord's cellar,
from which he is nursing sore
legs and ribs.
***
Mr. John Nolan and his
bridge have "got settled down to
the stern realities of life at their
home in McKillop. They gave
the young folks a grand party
on Monday night of last week,
when nearly 100 of the youth
and beauty glided merrily to
the sweet strains of the violin
in the hands of Messrs. O'Hara
and T. Nolan, dancing being
kept up till the clock told the
hour for retiring, when all went
home wishing Mr. and Mrs.
Nolan a long and happy life.
***
I wonder how mar( peopl
in this country have ever heard
that there are camels running
wild in it --camels which the
government imported at great
expense and with no end of
fuss and feathers, and which,
after using awhile, it turned out
to die on the plains of Arizona.
Crossing the Colorado desert,
the passengers on the Atlantic
and Pacific railroad occdsional-
ly catch a glimpse of some
strange, weird creatures, neither
fish, flesh nor fowl, stalking
solemnly in the hot sandy
distance --a boding apparition,
enough to scare a timid tourist
into fits.
***
The excitement caused by the
striking of oil on Thompson's
farm, near Wallacetown, has
not abated, and more wells will
be sunk in the course of a few
days. The oil has risen to a
height of 61 feet in the
Thompson well.
JULY 30, 1920
Walton notes: Rev. R. A. and
Mrs. Lundy and Misses Maud
and Annie Ferguson are cam-
ping at Port Albert. Mr. John
MacDonald purposes building a
flax mill. He has about 115
acres of flax -and has employed
a number of Indians to pull it.
Quite a number from the vil-
lage and vicinity went to Brus-
sels on the 22nd. There was a
good crowd and also it was a
good success financially. Th'
proceeds go for a memorial,
but it has not yet been decided
what it will be. Some talk of a
clock.
***
SEAFORTH MARKETS
Eggs, per dozen...53 to .54c;
New Potatoes, per bag...$3.75;
Butter, per lb....50c; Spring
Wheat, per bushel...$1.90;
Wheat, per bushel...$1.95;
Oats, per bushel...$1:10; Bar-
ley, per bushel...$1.70; Flour,
per ctw....$7.80 to $7.90; Bran,
.per ton...$60.00; Shorts, per
ton...$70.00; Hogs, per
cwt...$20.25.
***
JULY 27, 1945
A record crowd of joyous
people thronged the Lions Park
Friday night for a final night's
entertainment of the Seaforth
Lions 11th annual summer
carnival. •
A repeat attraction of Wed-
nesday night was the "double
or nothing" quiz contest, with
new contestants conducted by
and broadcast over CKNX,
Wingham, and amplified so
that all in the park might hear
this special broadcast. The
contestants taking part in the
quiz contest were: Mrs. Robert
Fairservice, Londesboro; David
Grieve, Seaforth; Walter Bos-
weil, Seaforth; Edith Nicole,
Camp Borden; K. I. McLean,
Seaforth, and Pat Carter,
Detroit.
Early Thursday morning the
Supertest gas station on No. 4
Highway, at the corner. of Main
Street, operated by Melvin
Moir, was broken into and
-robbed.
JULY 30, 1970
Huron and Perth counties are
being left behind in provincial
and regional development an
analysis of the Midwestern
Ontario region has revealed.
A government analysis of the
social and economic needs of
the four -county Midwestern
Region of Ontario was released
in Listowel Monday night by
the Hon. Charles Mac -
Naughton, Provincial Treasurer
and Minister of Economics.
***
Two Seaforth doctors were
among twenty-three family
physicians from across Canada
to be conferred with the title
Fellow of the College of
Family Physicians of Canada.
They are Dr. P. L. Brady and
Dr. R. A. Whitman.
04I�
14, JULY 30thto AUGUST 3rd rf NifNNIAt "Citi eR AtION
5 DAYS of FUN and FROLIC
SATURDAY
2-Pion.er Cabin Opens
4 -Municipal welcome
S -bell Gare.
8-CKNX Broodcost
9 -Street Bingo
9 -Barn Dance
SEE THESE PROGRAM
SUNDAY
9:45-C.B.C. Broadcast
11 -Reunion Church Services
2 -legion Parade; B Bonds
3-0,umhead Service
8:30 --Bond Concert
12:01 -Midnight Dance
DANCING
MONDAY
9:30 -Back -to -School
1:IS-Monster Porode
RCAF Central Commend
Bond; Acrobatic Display
2:30 -Opening Ceremonies
8:30 -Bond itattoo
11 e.m.-ficttiv-aslcs
HIGHLIGHTS
TUESDAY
1I -Unveiling Plaque to
Pioneers
2 -Highland Gomes and
Athletic Events - Pipe
Bonds -- Children's Day
9 -Loco) Talent Programme
and Reception
WEDNESDAY
1-Porade - little German
Bond
-HORSE RACES
9:30 -Centenary and Reun•
ion Dona - Presen-
tation of Beauty
Outten
EVERY NIGHT • • • STREET CARNIVALS
CARTER'S MIDWAY AND RIDES
4
- WILL YE NO CELEBRATE WITH SEAFORTH ?
1