HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Wingham Times, 1916-10-26, Page 6Pagt h
1
FM YEARS
TORTtflff
Nothing Veined Hine Until He Took
"FRUIT -A -TIMES„
ALBERT VARNER
Buckingham, Que., May 3rd, 1915.
Por seven years, I suffered terribly
from Severe Headaches tend Indigestion.
I had belching gas from the stomach,
bitter stud' would come up into my
mouth after eating, while tit times I had
nausea and vomiting, and had chronic
Conat iliac ion. I went to several doctors
are; wrote to a specialist in Boston tett
wi,iaout Benefit. I tried ninny r:'nn'dies
but noilther cli.tl me good.
. ,,,'t d-tivr.. . I took
this ran I Ire.., ut'i'lising and it made
ret"" w'll. 1 ern eras, fel to c'Fruita-
1:a •.4'> it: t ;,, evcryo:h' who has mise -
r:2:: , li.'.,,'! ..:c£' •n,::i:eitleaaril in li-
ge ..,:t a': 1 l',11 ::r: r' . 1 sa:v
pr ..
'a.I,(%t.av a.
Oddities of Taaaiion.
In England there have been many
amusing taxes and more amusing eva-
sions. At one time the horse was sin-
gled out as a peculiar victim. and the
farmer evaded the obligation by riding
his cow to market or by harnessing, his
wife to the cart alongside of a big dog
to drag the produce to town. The tax
oa chimneys resulted in the destruction
of many One old fireplaces, and the tax
on windows bad the effeet of making
the hooses look as if they had been
boarded up and deserted. It also im-
paired the eyesight of hundreds of Eng-
lishrea.
A Cobbler's Dozen.
In mist etamtetes t! i:te,'n is always
spoken of as "the talker's dozen," but in
Italy it ie called "a cobblers dozen."
There is a tradition in that land that
formerly there was a law compelling
cobblers t, put twelve naiis around the
'edge of a beat heel awl that when nails
were cheap a tbirteenthnail svas driven
In the center for luck.—London 3IaiL
Something Wrong.
"Is this a studied insult or what Is
it?"
"How now. glrliei"
"This fellow writes en hie card,
"Sweets to th:' sweet' and sends me a
package of lemon drops."
The Back Yonder Club.
What has become of the family that
used to eat Sunday dinner that was
L
cooked on Saturday?
aturlay.
When did yon ever see a sawbuck?
Not to go back too far, do you know
what a sawbuck is?
His Vile Disposition.
"Fine day, Mr. Gloom. and"—
"Well, you didn't make it, did your
snapped J. Puller Gloom. "Then what
are you bragging about it for?'
Quite Friendly.
Hennypeck—Scoots eloped with my
wife last night Gabbleton—Why, I
thought he was your best friend. I3en-
h,Tpeek-1-Ie ls.--London Telegraph.
Children Cry
�t
FOR FLETCHER'S
` r A S T Q e A
WI; Pavorilb' Phrase.
* when they were thlitinty ktera.
Veg. Isebe) Strong said to Robert
Stevenson, "At lest yen have
ti» nneriLms," whereupon SteveLison
'look R' et ' bis oaf *a qtreltf Men,"
:which She wstS reading, Ott of her
lemras attil read, "It Was it Wttrderinl
titeyar Watt Of stars." 'Oh," he said,
"chow taxon teatz7 times I have wilt,
laded '!t Wandettat wear night of stars.'"
A Teat Caws
d to swim bop',
moktien-ttetet case?,
lotc tknt t2ono, TRy ms his
ts► . eget to
eoliie w,bet'l>m tire" Watch to f tro
"WWI leitrerSlIY :it m* lei up more
Olinda Of the Sande tdmtL" ,
Om* o w Wags
Atwd+-: iiltiplt_ of ft 144
Ora 5Ai line ;, glor iwe to' (but
:OS Wit tit*** 1'qt the *term" to'rhic+1
rellettee't the true appearatrte of
SHOWED HIM THE DOOR.
And Dickens Wont and Stood Not
Upon the Order of His Going.
Colonel 13. was the proprietor of. a
widely kuow,t, old house in tate south
which three-quarters of tt century u..;o
bad earned ite reputation as a eel'.
conducted tavern.
When Char:es Dickens ease to Amer-
ica he stopped :et this southern bonee,
ile was hardly settled to his room tie-
fore Colonel B. was at the door. LIe
assured him that itis horses, his win's,
all the lavish hospitality or a state
famed for its generosity, stood at the
convenience of the distinguished vis-
itor.
Dickens reeeived the proffer coldly.
Iu Loudon one did not accept a cavern
keeper as a sucial equal, So i;, was
that he returned the courteous offer by
saying that when he wished the serv-
ices of the iiutkeeper he would seed for
him.
For sixty seconds Colonel 13. stood si-
itut, his great face growing redder ail
the while. Finally he stretched out a
long arin toward Dickens.
"You go, sir!" he stammered. 'And
do not stand upon the order of your
going."
The uoveltst went. And it is to be
trusted he had learned that the Ameri-
can hotel keeper of that day and age
was not to be confused with his broth-
er in faroff Europe.—Edward Hunger-
ford
ungerford in Saturday Evening Post
Social Structure.
What is a social structure? It may
be an ant hill or a democracy. It is
usually composed of a mass of indI-
viduals banded together for mutual
disagreement. It is centripetal and
centrifugal. Each individual would
tike to get out of it, but he doesn't
know how. Small masses of individ-
uals, also banded together. would like
to get out of it, but they don't know
how. Larger masses of individuals
banded together would like to get rid
of some of the smaller masses, but
they don't know how, Nobody wants
everybody else to stay. Everybody
doesn't want anybody to stay. The
result is that nobody can get rid of
anybody.
Hence the social structure.—Life.
Origin of Geometry.
There is little doubt that the science
of geometry had its origin in Egypt.
The annual overflow of the Nile wiped
out an landmarks and boundaries, and
some reliable means of measuring the
earth was an absolute necessity;
bence the rise of geometry, which
means earth measurement. From all
accounts the philosopher Thales took
the science from Egypt to Greece,
where it was greatly improved and
carried very near the perfection it
finally reached through the discoveries
of the celebrated Descartes of the sev-
enteenth century.
Crops and Gizzards.
Inseets are oddly constructed atoms
of animated nature, as a rule, and it
def.i- ids altogether on the species as
to internal makeup. In bees the crop
is called the "honey bag." Insects
with meedibles usually bave a modi-
fied form of the gizzard so typical in
the e'.m:.ion barnyard fowL In some
cases tins miniature gizzard is a per -
feet wonder shop, its inner surface be-
ing provided with "pads" covered with
"horns" and "bristles" in great profu-
sion, The grasshopper's gizzard is
lined with innumerable rows of teeth,
very minute, of course, but well devel-
oped, true teeth, nevertheless. The
same may be said of crickets and oth-
er insects of that sort
Assyrian Seals.
The ancient Assyrians nearly 6,000
years ago put in moist clay their seals,
engraved in intaglio upon precious
stones, on chests and doors, in order
to prevent their being opened. There
were no locks or keys in those days.
If they wished to send a private let-
ter they would often seal it with a
hippogriff, which fabulous winged
horse was regarded as the emblem of
secrecy. Centuries later the Greeks
and Romans adopted similar devices
for the same purpose.
His Maiden Speech.
It is related that when the Earl of
Rochester in the reign of Charles IL
rose to make his maiden speech in ;.ne
house of lords he said: "My lord,—my
lords, I rise this time for the first time
—the very first time. My lords, I di-
vide my speech into four branches."
Here there was an embarrassing pause
of some seconds. "My lords," the earl,
then ejaculated, "It ever I rise ag p
in this house you may ent me off, roq-
and branches and all, forever."—Loirk-
don Standard.
No Common Cue.
When assessing a family in Ireu i
ton the question of "what breed" 'WAS
asked of the owner of the family dog.
The woman of the .house answered:
"He's Just a cur." Her six-year-old sora
straightened himself Uri to his full
height, patted his dog on the head and
proudly proclaimed, "lees, and he's a
full blooded ear too."- Indianaiott"t
hewn.
Gould Lies on Lova
Posher—Tee idea o[ marryttg that
young fellow! He couldn't
enough money together to bad'
signore meal. Datighter---lut what
weed that, snake? We ha'vesi t
either or -at hail a bit of appetite fir
Hi* Keener Otto.
osaro a' d'fitl yoregiet each., tortesee, ere. 11
bees, i ikas out a400kint for
trouble irtit r11I lett eYe evils do filet to
THE WINGHAM TIMES
October, 26 1916
WI -IAT YOU CAN DO
The Monthly it.,,eth 1.au letin, i;stead
by the Toronto Lepartrr,er.t of 11c•alt%t,
in ick curreat number, dis,usses comrno.l
in'ectinus dis aces, tee) n:rdl,y anti
of lCrwise. The "others%ist•" part of
it reads:
You have in your own /lards the most
powerful weni,ou t.., a and ell uts,. ase.
You can 1.c:ep tlta f'r2;;Ves out of the
nose and mouth, and teecu your child-
ren to do the same. When .vnu cough
you can turn your face to the •„ round,
or you can use a handkerchief it you
have time to reaeh it. You can weaeh
your hands before meals for your own
protection, and after meals for the pro-
tection of others. You can avoid the
close proximity of persona who are
toughing and sneezing. Yru ran in
short, practice personal specific cleanli-
ness in addition to the ordinary oap
and water cleanliness that you urdeubt-
edly practice already. The preventive
measures which you ran apply for your.
self are very real, and if they were the
common rule instead of the exception
would accomplish wonders in eradicating
the diseases which are the commonest.
PAINTING OF FARM IMPLEMLNTS
The painting of farm implements for
their protection and preservation has
apparently received very little con-
sideration by Canadian fanners, if one
may judge by the information secured
by the Commission of Conservation in
the survey conducted on 1110 farms in
each of four counties in Ontario, In
Waterloo, not one farmer who painted
his implements, was found among the
hundred, in Carleton only one, in
Northumberland three, and in Dundas
eleven.
The use of paint on both the wooden
and metal parts of machinery gives a
protecting cover against deterioration
by use and weather. apart altogether
from the general improvement in
appearance. The cost of prepared paint
for the purpose is very small, and ex-
perience in the work is unnecessary,
The initial cost of farm implements
means to the farmers a large outlay.
This investment should be protected,
Depreciation from rot and rust is rapid,
when once these conditions are estab-
lished, For the actual money saving as
for the more prosperous appearance it
gives to the farm and farmer, the
regular overhauling and painting of the
farm implements should be a recognized
part of the years work. - D
Sluggish Liver
CAUSES LOTS
F TROUBLE.
Unless the liver is working properly
you may look forward to a great many
troubles arising, such as constipation,
-were headaches, bilious headaches, sick
headaches, jaundice, sick stomach, etc.
Mrs. J. Shellsworth, 227 Albemarle
St., Halifax, N.5., writes: "I take
pleasure in writing you concerning the
;great value I have received by using your
:lilburn's taxa -Liver Pills for a sluggish
liver. When my liver got bad I would
have severe headaches, but after using a
couple of vials of your pills I have not
been bothered with the headaches any
more."
Nlilhurn's Laxa-Liver Pills are, with -
,rt a doubt, the best liver regulator on
ti'e market to -day. Twenty-five years of
a reputation should surely prove this.
Milburn's Laxa-Liver Pills are 25 cents
+:er vial, 5 vials for 81.00; for sale at all
,'eaters, or mailed direct an receipt of
r'-icc by The T. 'r•lilbunt Co., Limited,
Toronto, Ont.
Nervous and Almost Crazy .
With Pains in the Head
Clergyman Certifies to This Cure of Nervous Prostration
by Use of Dr. Chafe's Nerve Food.
No ailment is more discouraging
than Nervous Prostration. You may
feel better for a day or two, only to
and the next day that you have lost
ground And are worse than ever, The
headaches are worse, languid feelings
are terribly depressing. As you lose
strength you lose hope and courage
and loolt to the future with fear and
trembling.
Dr. Chase's Nerve Food is the
greatest blessing that has ever come
to the sufferer from nervous exhaus-
tion. It is not narcotic in its influ-
ence. It does not deaden the trembl-
ing, irritated nerves, but through the
medium of the blood nourishes them
back to health as nothing else can,
Airs. Alonzo. B. Eisner, Bllltown,
Ding's county, N.S., writes :—"I was
very low with nervous prostration and
was about discouraged, as I could not
sleep nights and was almost crazy
with the pain in my head, I had tried
many doctors, but seemed to got lit-
tle benefit from their treatments,
"A friend handed me Dr. Chane'e
Almanac. so that I might read about
the Nerve Food. A aingle box of this
treatment convinced me of Ito value,
for I was better. I cannot tell how
niany boxes I used, but the results
were so highly satisfactory that I can-
not pr£tlse it too much. My health
and strength ;have been restored so
that I can do all my own work, and
I recommend. the Nerve Food to all
who suffer from nervous prostration."
"This is to certify that I am ac-
quainted with Mrs. A. 13. Eisner and
believe her statement in regard to
Dr, Chases Nerve Food . to be true
ane correct." --.Rev, Arthur A. Whit-
man.
Some patience is required Ln the
treatment of nervous prostration, but
You will not be using Dr. Chase's
Nerve Food long before you begin to
find your strength and good cheer re-
turning. You will then be encour-
aged to continue the use of the food
cure until cured, 50 cents a box, all
dealers, or Edmaneon, Bates & Com-
pany, Limited Toronto.
LUXURIES CHEAP IN BRITAIN
While the necessaries of life, such as
bread, sugar, meat, .milk and ordinary
vegetables, have doubled in price in
Great Britain, the luxuries were never
in living memory so cheap.
Thus, while beef and mutton can
scarcely be purchased under 37 to 40
cents a pound, vension, which prior to
the war was never sold under GO cents,
can now be bought at 12 cents. Oysters
are within the reach of all, English
natives are now retailed in west end
restaurants at 25 cents the dozen, where
formerly they had a ready sale at 90
cents. Pineapples which used to com-
mand anything from 51 to $2.50, are
now procurable at 10 to 20 cents, but
the humble orange, which was formerly
sold at half cent each, are now compar-
atively, luxuries, at 4 cents each. 'Of
course there is no particular demand
among the masses for vension, grouse
and pineapple, otherwise the price
would go up.
IL
Tro not suffer
another day with
Itching Bleed-
ing, or erotrud-
ing Piles. No
surgical oper-
ation required.
Dr. Chase's Ointment will relieve you at once
and as certainly cure you. 60c, a box ail
dealers, or Edmaneon, Bates & Co., Limited,
Toronto. Sample hos free if you mention this
paper and enclose 2c. stamp to Pay postage.
CATS AS BIRD DESTROYERS
In an address on the protection of
bird life, delivered recently before the
Commissonion of Conversation, atten-
tion was directed to the fact that the
domestic cat in one of the most ce•
structive enemies of wild birds. This
contention is supported by the follow-
ing quotation from a report ;iy the
Massachusetts State Board of Agricul-
ture:
"Most people do not realize how de-
structive cats are to bird life because
their attention has never been called to
the facts and because most feline de-
predations occur at night. In my in-
vestigation much evidence has been
secured which is convincing. In the
year 1903, at tete instance of the sec-
retary of the State Board of Agriculture
an inquriy was undertaken regarding
the decrease of birds in Massachusetts.
As a part of this investigation a ques-
tionnaire was sent out to some. 400
correspondents, which was filled out
and returned by more than 200. In re-
sponse to a question regarding the
effect producted on birds by their natur-
al enemies, 82 correspondents reported
cats as very destructive to birds. This
was a much larger number than those
reporting any other natural enemy as
destructive. Nearly all- who reported
on the natural enemies of birds placed
the cat first among destructive an-
imals."
Many a man on the road to fortune
doesn't know at what station to get off.
A good wife is born, not made; a good
husband is the result of intensive cult-
ivation.
Torturing, Itching Eczema
Mrs. J. B. Horth, Paspebiac, Bona -
venture Co., Que., writes:—"Thanks to
Dr. Chase's Ointment I have been com-
pletely cured of that horrible disease,
eczema. I was held as if in prison
from going among other people, for I
was ashamed of the raw, flaming sores.
Doctors could do nothing for me and I
was almost desperate with suffering
when I began to use Dr. Chase's Oint-
ment. In one month I was completely
cured and think that this was little
short of a miracle."
Gzet"More Money" for your Skunk
Muskrat, Raccoon, Foxes, White Weasel, Fisher
and other Fur bearers collected in your section
SHIP YOUR FURS DIRECT to "SHUBERT" the largest
house in the World dealing exclusively In NORTH AMERICAN RAW FURS
a reliable—responsible—safe Fur House with an unblemished rep-
utation existing for "more than a third of a century," a long suc-
cessful record of sending Fur Shippers prompt,SATIS FACTORY
AND PROFITABLE returns, Write for "Vic Varian ,hipper,"
the only reliable, accurate mark et report and price list published.
Write for it—NOW—it's FREE
A. B. SHUBERT, inc. Ese-p2,7,AER'EN, U S.A.
Who Aitswers
You/fe1ephone?
It is of prime importanc,'to your business that the person
answering your telephone be pleasant -voiced, pale, intelligent.
A curt, snappy answer results in loss of trades.
It is important, too, that your telephone be answered by an
enegkegee who is thoroughly posted on the details of yotir
business. It is annoying to call and be answered by someone who
wilt let you tell him everything you have to say and then intopn
you that you will have to tall the whole story to someone else.
We suggest that you give this m 4 -ter of lir opting
calls your careful attention. Matey merchants insist on their most
experienced employees answering the telephone:
The Bell Telephone r
o1+ CANADA.
Fun Kings
We defy anyone to look
on the sad side of life
when the delicious, negro,
drollery of Bert Williams
is at hand or when the
inexhaustible humor of
Joe Hayman, "Cal a,.n.ity
Cohen," is ready to divert ii
COLUMBIA
Double -Dias
RECORDS
Step into any Columbia deaier'a and listen to.
Bert Williams--A1289-85c.
My Landlady (Williams)
Nobody (Williams)
Joe Hayman -82958-8$s
Cohen Arrested for Speediug
Cohen at the Call Oin),ce.
Raymond Hitchcock --A5231—$1.25
Ain't it Funny What a Difference Just a Few
Hours Make
And the World Goes On.
Weber & Fields—A1S55-85e.
Restaurant Scene with Trust Scene
Billy Williams -81564-85c.
Here We are Again (Williams & Godfrey)
When Father Papered the Parlor (Williams
& Weston)
Remember Columbia dealers gladly play these or any of the
thousands ofColumbia Records you would like to hear, entirely
free. Complete Record list at any Columbia dealer's, or write
for it to:
Graphophone Company
Canadian Factory a Headquarters
Toronto, Ont.
16
H. B. ELLIOTT
Sole Agent Wingham, Ontario
Try the "Times" with your next order
of job printing.
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Manzioes, Newspapers, Novels .
All the leading Magazines and Newspapers
Novels at the popular prices roc and 15c
IimesStationcry Store
i 1
on sale. A large stock of fatnous S. & S.
OPPOSITE QUEEN'S HOTEL w1NGHAN, ONT