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The Goderich Signal-Star, 2009-08-12, Page 7Goderich Signal -Star, Wednesday, August 12, 2009 - Page 7 Goderich could construct a new sports centre Who agrees with this project? Well, first of all, if you take out a map of Ontario and you threw a dart at it and it landed a bulls -eye right here in Goderich, you would see that we are right smack in the middle of Southwestern Ontario. Education, sports, jobs are on an enroll- ment decline. It's time to pick it up a notch. Let's not fall asleep here in Goderich. Here are a couple of ideas for this town: One: With the hard, dedicated staff at the YMCA, and with their information they have available, they could create_ a north, south and east league for all sports for every season and every age group in Goderich. That way, they can bring them all to Goderich. Letters opinion 'No: Spend some money to have a facil- ity to entertain them all by taking down that grandstand and build a four -level state-of-the-art building. The first level would be for equipment and a betting area so we can have horse racing back every Thursday night. Second`Zevel for all hock- ey groups with the surrounding walls for a hall of fame. Third level for all baseball groups — same thing with the hall of fame but have a balcony to the west to watch the games. Fourth level for all the soccer groups with a balcony to the south side to watch games. This building could enter- tain not just the two teams playing, but Butternut trees need our help To the Editor; The Huron Stewardship Council is again running a project to locate and assess but- ternut trees in the Counties of Huron and Perth. Many landowners have contacted us in the last year, allowing the locating of over 200 trees on 60 sites. We would like to thank these people for their help. Butternut, a native tree threatened by a canker disease, has been designated an endangered species in Ontario. The canker, first identified in the Southern U.S., has been spreading northward, and has deci- mated the butternut population in several states. Cankers appear as blackened sooty marks on the stem which develop into open wounds with loose bark. The purpose of the project is to assess how badly our trees are affected by the but- ternut canker and whether some are show- ing resistance. This will help establish the status of the species in our area. If you have butternut on your property, you are asked to call Steve Bowers with the Huron Stewardship Council at (519)482- 3661, or John Irwin, field assessor, at (519)482-9517, to arrange a site inspection. Your assistance is appreciated. John Irwin Clinton four to six teams there that day. help out? I'm sure that all businesses throughout Well, my answer is this. I gave this idea the Town of Goderich would support this to the town and the YMCA and if you need building and this project. That would bring my help, just point me to my office. I'll be lots of people to our town during all four there. seasons and also bring more businesses to P.S. To my friend wherever you are right our area. now, enjoy yourself Pete Henry! Also, host one gigantic sports fest in June. • I know the question that would come up — So Fred, are you going to volunteer and Fred Schoemaker Goderich Kingsbridge rallies for family in need To the Editor; We live in a wonderful area which is known for helping others during challeng- ing times. We have another opportunity to rise to the occasion. Rhonda, the eldest daughter of Tom and Karla Hogan of Kingsbridge, is married to Mike Munro. They live in the Embro area where Mike operates a dairy farm with his uncle, cousin and brother. Mike and Rhonda have two sons, eight and nine years old. In May Mike was paralysed from the waist down in a farm accident. He has undergone surgery and completed a rigorous physio- therapy program at Parkwood Hospital in London. He is now at home but will require ongoing treatment and care. Friends in the Embro area are organizing a fundraising event for Mike and his family. They are having a community pig roast and silent auction on Saturday,'August 22 at the Embro Arena from 4 p.m. to 1 a.m. A bank account has been opened for Mike at a local Royal Bank. We would welcome donations to help support this young family and a former resident of our community. Cheques should be made payable to "Mike Munro" and can be forwarded to Paul and Anita Frayne at R.R.#3, Goderich, ON. N7A 3X9 (529- 7711). Cheques or cash donations can also be dropped off at The Lucknow Sentinel office. A presentation will be made the night of the fundraising event. Everyone is invited to attend on August 22. If there is enough interest, a bus could be chartered. Please contact Tom and Shannon Hogan at 395-3674 for bus details and ticket information. Anita Frayne Goderich A lesson in subtle humour, or Indiana Jones he ain't Humour, today, is harsh. I suppose the coarse comedy popular today is inevitable. It's a rough and dangerous world in which we live and humour is a reflection of our times. Over the top, over the line, graphic, gross and predictable, almost all of today's humour can be symbolized by the comedian Carrothead smashing watermelons and pumpkins with a sledge hammer. And he gets laughs for this closing stunt except from viewers in the third world who don't under- stand the entertainment value•of food. A few years ago I taught a week-long course in humour at the Chautauqua Institute in New York. For one special presentation my class consisted of 40 members of Elderhostels, a group of seniors who spend their retirement years traveling and learning as they go. Part of my presentation touched on the value of satire and subtle humour. Everyone had a great time, the comments were unanimously positive and Amy Warner of the Smithsonian Institute, the group's sponsor, presented me with a letter. Although it was a terrific example of the kind of subtle humour I'd been covering in my course, still, I couldn't help letting the group know that I was really hoping for a bottle of Single Malt Scotch. For a very long time an amateur archaeolo- gist had been making what he believed to be miraculous discoveries by digging up his own back yard in Newport,' Rhode Island. Insisting the objects he found there were legitimate and important historical finds, Scott Williams would attach scientific -sounding names to these "artifacts" and send them off to the Smithsonian Institute in Washington for verification. Instead of dismissing the man as a crank and ignoring his submis- sions, Harvey Rowe, Chief Curator — Antiquities, decided to give Scott Williams and his archeological dis- coveries the time and consideration they deserved. The result is the best example of understated humour I have ever come across. Here then is Harvey Rowe's written response to the man who would be Indiana Jones: "Dear Mr. Williams: Thank you for your latest submission to the Institution, labeled "93211-D layer seven, next to the clothesline post ..." Hominid skull. We have given this speci- men a careful and detailed examination, and regret to inform you that we disagree with your theory that it represents conclusive proof of the presence of Early Man in Charleston County two million years ago. Rather it appears that what you have found is •the head of a Barbie doll, of the variety that one of our staff, who has small children, believes to be "Malibu Barbie." It is evident that you have given a great deal of thought to the analysis of this specimen, and you may be quite certain that those of us who are All the World's A Circus... familiar with your prior work in the field were loath to come to contra- diction with your findings. However, we do feel that there are a number of physical -attributes of the specimen which might have tipped you off to its modern origin: 1. The material is molded plastic. Ancient hominid remains are typi- cally fossilized bone. 2. The cranial capacity of the specimen is approximately nine cubic centimeters, well below the thresholds of even the earliest identified proto-hominids. 3. The dentition pattern evident on the skull is more consistent with the common domesticated dog than it is with the ravenous man-eating Pliocene clams you speculate roamed the wetlands during that time. This latter finding is certainly one of the most intriguing hypotheses you have submit- ted in your history with this institution, but the evidence seems to weigh rather heavily against it. Without going into too much detail, let us say that: a. The specimen looks like the head of a Barbie doll a dog has chewed on. b. Clams don't have teeth. Sadly, we must deny your request that we approach the National Science Foundation Phylogeny Department with the concept of assigning your specimen and scientific name Australopithecus spiff-arino. Speaking per- sonally, I for one fought tenaciously for the acceptance of your proposed taxonomy but was ultimately voted down because the spe- cies name you selected was hyphenated and didn't really sound like it might be Latin. However, we gladly accept your generous donation of this fascinating specimen to the museum. While it is undoubtedly not a Hominid fos- sil, it is, nonetheless, yet another riveting example of the great body of work you seem to accumulate here so effortlessly. You should - know that our Director has reserved a special shelf in his own office for the display of specimens you have previously submitted to the Institution, and the entire staff speculates daily on what you will happen upon next in your digs at the site you have discovered in your Newport back yard. We eagerly anticipate your trip to our nation's capital that you proposed in your last letter, and several of us are pressing the Director to pay for it. We are particularly interested in hearing you expand on your theories surrounding the trans-positating fil- lifitation of ferrous metal in a structural matrix that makes the excellent juvenile Tyrannosaurus Rex femur you recently dis- covered take on the deceptive appearance of a rusty 9-mni Sears Craftsman automotive crescent wrench. Yours in Science, Harvey Rose, Chief Curator — Antiquities, Smithsonian Institution. Subtle humour, delicate with the power of a sledge hammer.