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HomeMy WebLinkAboutExeter Advocate, 1913-10-25, Page 1311EXP,EC"ilili ANSWER. a flee TdiS trI Ilea Bark- er's Reree Trade. ""A soft answer .ain't the only one that'll turn away wrw b," observed Caleb Peaslee, reflectively, "Nine times out of ten the onexpeeted answer will de, just as well—and the tenth time it'll jolt a feller wuss, mebbe, Suthin' odd come undo my observation this very rs.ornzn Lysander Winchcpe turned stiffly in' his chair, the better: to see his friend. Caleb was grazing musing- ly at the horizon, and a philosophi- eal smile played upen his mild old ,,face, Mr. Winchope fiddled with 'llis• e.o ie impetienttly, "Are you a'goin' to begin," he asked,, at length, "or ain't ye?" Mr. Peaslee's eyes twinkled sly- ly. "Sartain I'll begin, gi , Lysander," he replied, heartily. `"You hadn't showed .any int'rost in it up to now, and I was kind of studyin' over it. The ways of hose -traders are odd and curious. Dickerin' and tradirt' seems to give them curves and slants in 'their minds different from other folks, and even their ways of gettin' out of scrapes seen to be ways of their own. Ain't youever noticed it, Lysander? Ain't it so, Greg "Get along with your story!" ad- jured the inipatient Lysander. Mr. Gregg said nothing, but waited ex- pectantly. "Don't hurry me," returned Ca•- :,- lel aseeily; . , "I don't want to get. all fret up. It s'eem's that Hen Bar- ker has been tryin' to sell a hoss to two different people. You know. Hen. Barker, over to Amherst Cor- ner, don't you ?" "I know him well •=consarn him l" snapped Mr. •Winchope. Gregg shook his head doubtfully. "Don't believe I ever saw , him," he said. ""'T least, I don't remem- ber him." "You'd remember him if you'd ever seen him," affirmed Mr. -Peas- lee. "If he didn't skin you on a hose -trade the fust time you met him, you'd remember him for the homeliest man you ever saw. He's so homely that flies won't light on him. A. fly goin' ,towards Hen Bar - keel' turn a square corner and get away soon's he sees where he's goin'—and like enough sprain a wing doin' it, He's .so homely he'll scare a strange hoes right out of the road, and out into the bushes. He's awful plain -f eatured ! "It seems that Hen had a hots that le was tryin' to sell to two dif- :lerent puasons," Mr. Peaslee eon-. ti; heed, "and one of'them.,was , that. maiden""liicy "over in Clifton. She wanted a hose that she could de- pend upon not to act skittish when she was drivin', and. Hen assured her that the critter was just what she wanted. "•"The other likely customer was Jim Sneed, and he wanted a boss that had consid'able life and go in him—one he'd got to hang onto come. Hen told Sneed that if he hunted a year he couldn't find a hoss that .would come nearer to fillin' them requirements than that very critter. You see, Hen's fg- gerin' was all right --from a `'hoss- trad.er's p'int of view. If he could- n't sell the hoes to, the old maid for a quiet one, :he could sell him to Jim for one• that was full of gin- ger. "The only thing Hen overlooked was that Jim supplied the :old lady with her butter and garden -truck, and she took it into her head to tell Jim about the boas, and ask his opinion, and when they got to earns ar'in' notes, they found out, what en was up to. So the old lady was a waitin for Hen the next time be showed up, and she give him about as thorough a goin' over as a man ever got,I guess. ' Hen sot there and took it` --till she 'Wound up with .a final hang! Mr. Barker,' says she, `I. think happy New Year! Are you acquainted with e sweet, toasty flavor of ost Toasties ^Crisp krililcles. of choice Indian Corn—'Coasted to f1 delicate golden brown early to eat 'direct front ackage? Wholesome, convenient nib immensely " appetizing. Ask the grot',er-ran emutato emu* detail an,, Lt& Windboa°, Ontirk. you're the most "two-faced Men It ever met in all toy life:!' "`1l'en looked at her kinder' re, proaohfnl for jest a minute. "Miss Gravels,,' the answered her, 'do. you honestly think" that if 1 ;had two faces I'd ever'use theone !'n weariu' now?' ":and would yorr believe it," Mr. l'ea"slee .concluded, iinPressively, "that answer 'was so onexpe<ted that she bought the ' hoes, after all !,"—Youth's Companion, IN •PIPER'S POCKET.. A. COmieal Incident .Just •Before the Battle. "lf an old soldier .should tat rue," remarked; the veteran "tic he wasn't nervous before his first battle, I suppose I. should have to believe him, but I should regard him as a 'f freak o nature. , Ther aren't many who could ' say a much. I know 1 :was scared thr+a:ugh and .through, .and besides that, I was scared for fear somebody else would find it' out. I was nineteen, and I've often'thought that if it. hadn't been for'a little tiling that happened to distract my mind while I we were on the march, my legs n�e- ver would have carried me to the front, but in quite the other direc- tion. "We were in camp, end ,just get- ting ready to have our dinner, when orders .e -me for ne to hurray forward and join a brigade that was likely to enga' e the enemy at` any minute. So we had to gobble down a cold snack ancl start. Having my Beet battle loom up before me sud- den like that, 1 couldn't eat much of anything, and not having had a civilized meal, I didn't have much stomach for fighting. At first I. was looking round for a haystack to scoot for and hide in;'but after a time I ' began to get interested in the left-hand overeoat pocket of the man in front of me, a chap named Piper, ""It looked to• me as if there was something very much alive in that pocket. Every now and then Piper would clap his hand over it, as if he was afraid the critter would get out, and I could hear stifled" noises from the depths of the pocket that made me.suspicious. The lieuten- ant heard them, too, for twice he turned round and looked fierce enough to eat. us. "By and by, when Piper. was off his guard, the thing poked its head out far enough to screech, 'Cut! cu -l' Piper' he squelched the second 'eut,'--cwt it in two, you might say; but the lieutenant heard something, and he' Idoked round and -shouted, "Silence in the ranks there !' "The men near Piper• snickered, but nothing more happened till the order came down the line.to shift our guns to the right shoulder. Then, of course, Piper had to use both; hands, and the minute he let go of his pocket out scrambled as mad a pullet "as you ever saw ; and when she'd flopped onto "the ground she scurried away, screeching,. `Cut! cut! cah-dah-eut 1'' at the top of her lungs. Well, the captain couldn't help . hearing that, and naturally the looked back to see what the row was; and when he saw what had"happened,•he sung out, at the top of his voice: ""'Corporal Davis, take three men and bring back that deserter !' "That made everybody feel mid- dling cheerful,.: but those who knew where the: chicken had. come from got a real good laugh when `Piper, put his hand into his pocket and puIled out a new -laid etrg. "Honestly, I forgot all about be- ing afraid after that." tion Scotia Case 0 ,Interest to Alt 'IYoine l Malli'eiX Serols Out a Messages of Help. to Many People. Halifax, NR., pec IL When . toter viewed. at be home at 194 Argyle Ste Mrs," Hayerstoek was 'quite willing tin talk of her peculiarly unfortunate case. "I' was always 'blue' and' deoreseed,', felt °weak, languid and utterly unfit' for any °work. My stomach was' ao, disordered that I had no appetite, What I did eat disagreed. ,r suffere greatly from dizziness and sick head ache and feared a nervous breakdown Upon 'my druggist's ,reconrmeuciatio I 'psetl.,, Dr'. Hamilton's Pills. I felt better at once. Tvery day 1 improved: In six • weeks I was a wet at woman, cured' completely after differ ent physicians- had failed to _help, me NAIR ALL FELL O T RiNGwoRrioNHEAo Also Neck, Big Bare Spot on Crown of 'Head. Cuticura Soap and Ointment Cured. 101Chapleau St., 'azontroal, Qneas, "' When my hrother• and ?C event to school We gob ringworms frozza the other children d and our hair all fell out. We had them on our beads and on our necks. ]For mouths I • bad a big hare spot on thecrown army heats n ; the size of a fifty -cent piece. Mother tried everything, all kinds of ointments, to cure I *bet everything seemed no good until one 1 day She saw an advertisement for Cutieuriti Soap' and Ointment. It was Cuticura Soap and Ointment, that cured us." (Signed) It is for:_ this reason, that I strongly urge sufferers` with stomach or diges 5 aF Ze rs, M. Blake;11lay 31, 1013. r ti ve troubles to use Dr, Hamilton' e pulse, s Dr. Hamilton's Pills strengthen: th stomach, improve ,digestion, .strength en the nerves and restore debilitated systems to "bealth, By; cleansing the i blood of long-standing impurities,- by bringing the system to a high, p"oin of. vigor, they effectually obese away weariness, depression and disease. Good for young or old,. for men, for Women, for children. All dealers eon • Dr. Hamilton's Pills ,of iVIandrake arid Butternut. •• FAMILY MAT HEIRLOOM, Samoans Have Great Pride in Their Artistic Work. Among the curious customs' of the Samoan people is that of making heir- looms of mats. These mats are as- sociated with the family as the hearth- stone is among other peoples. These mats are really works of art and are worthy of the boasts- which. the Samoans make concerning' them. Some of them have names known all over the group and are very valu- able. The most 'valuable as well as the `oldest is called Moe -e -Ful -Ful, or "The mat that slept among the creep- ers:" It got this title from it having been hidden away for years among the creeping convolvulus that grows wild along the seacoast. It is known to be at least 200 ,years old, as the' names of its earners during that time can be traded. The possession of such a. mat as this gives a certain rank and power to its owner, andthe o among , poorest est a Hong tliem have been known to refuse $500 for such a family treasure. ' The Fear of Poverty, • We have grown literally afraid to be poor. Wo despise anyone • who elects to be poor la order to sinsplity and gave bus inner life, We have last the power of oven imagining what the aaelent idealization of poverty could have meant; they liberation from material attaebmeuta, Oat' tutbribe'ii soul, the marilier fudffference, the ;pap ing our way by what wo are to, ;do, rind not by . what, we have, the right ! to #ling away our, life itt any moment irresponsiblytlro•more athletic trim, in .Short, the Morel lighting above, it ie certain that the prevaletit fear of bverty among the edtidated classes is the worst moral dines tee from whleh our eivilixat on Suffe r0,—Prof, Willinfri TCHY:RASH ON HANDS • Fergus, Ont.—" Outieurn• Soap and OW - Monte completely cured me of a rash on nay hands. The malt was reel like,wator blisters, very Itchy and sore.' Scratching made them t Sorer:, . 'Ito irritation wits bad at night_. x tried many remedies which did 'not do any gobde 1 used Cutii:ura. `Soap as a wash in tva*'water night and morning with Cuti- l euraOlntment and in less tban,a weekit was all gone." (Signed) Mrs. Isabeila..Gibson. MaV22,1913. The regular use of Cuticura Soap for toilet and bath not only tends to preserve, purify and beautify the skin, scalp, hair and hands, but assists in preventing inflammation, irrl- tation.and clogging of the pores, the Common. cause of pimples, blackheads and other un wholesome conditions of the skin, Cu*. cure Soap and Ointment aro sold, by druggists and dealers everywhere. For a liberal free sample of each, with 32-p. book, ,send post -card to Potter Drug & Chem. Corp, Dept. D, Boston, U. S, A. ? 4-ItABLE OP THE RICH MAN. Wanted to Go Into, the (laiden, But ,Was: Not Allowed: The Rich Man died, and found hini,self ,in ' a luxurious smoking - room. He touched the bell, and a l perfectly -trained flunkey . brought him. a wonderful cigar and the most I delicious white wine he had ever tasted. He lazily noticed that the room had no windows, and he thought he would like a little fresh air. He passed into the next and equally magnificent room, and there, too, he found no windows. But now he had a distinct desire for the open. In the third room also there were• no windows. He began to walk faster. He wanted to see a cloud, although hewer' in his life ]and he experienced such a desire. He started to run through rooms and rooms ; there was no end to them. He grew frantic, and rushed headlong, as it seemed to him, for miles and miles. At last he sank exhausted into a neat in a room papered in palegreen, and hung with oil paintings by. Royal Academicians, framed in costly gold. He rang an electric bell, fever- ishly. - Another perfect waiter ap- peared. "I want to go into the garden. Show ane the way, quick." "Sorry, sir but it's against or dens," was the respectful answer. "Aeainst orders ! ! What, 'isn't this Heaven?" "No, sir !" Host. Pleasant Care Known For Cold Iii the I[ end Gives Relief• in Ten Minutes. Every second person that you meet seems to have a sneeze and stuffed feeling in the forehead and nostrils. To cure promptly, say, in half an hour, there is nothing worth using. except Catarrhozone- . You inhale its balsamic vapor, and feel as if You were among the Norway pines. This is because Catarrhozone contains a heading med- icine, light as pine air, which is breathed straight into the lungs and bronchial tubes. Away goes the cold; sneezing and catarrhal cough cease, bronchial irritation estops; in short you are 'cured. of catarrh by .a pleas- ant, simple remedy, tree from seda- tives and ire.. ants. An ideal protection for the chest, lungs, nose, and throat is the frequent use of Catarrhozone. Two months' treatment (the large size) Costs $1.00, medium sizes 50c.; at all dealers or the Catarrhozorie Co., Buffalo, N.Y., and Kingston, Canada. The other day a gentleman: met a little boy who was crying. "What's the matter 1" . asked the gentleman. "My Shoes hurt my feet, " said the boy. "Why, you've got them on the wrong =feet." "Wrong feet! Why, they're the only feet I've got, ain't they'?" said the boy. Try Murine Eye Remedy' If you, have Red, Weak, Watery Eyes or Granulated Eyelids. Doesn•'t Smart Soother Eye Pain. Druggists Sell Murine Eye Remedy, Liquid, 25c, 50c. Murine Eye Salve in Aseptic Tubes, 25c, 50c, • Eye Books Free by Mail. An Eye Tonto Good far: A11 ty.. that Naed' ear. Murine Etre Remedy Co., Chicago Pearls of Truth. The world has a million roosts for a man, but only one rest. -0. W, Holmes. One of the saddest things of to- dayis that wealthy people are not giving -thein sons to the Church,.. Bishop ofSouthwe]l, - One whose daily life is careless Xis always, weak. But one who habit- ually walks in the paths of upright- ness and obedience grows strong in. character,- „tiller, .Most people think they are virtu- ous merely because they are ,lapse and Infaf):cnsrve. ,Temeness iii not 1t virtue, it is merely the absence of rx vrtse,' J. 5, fllackie.: The man Who bets the most._out of life is the man who puts t!ie', ntost int it ., WHY LEAVES FALL. Botanist of Java and 'Ceylon Seeking Light on Subject. Froin a study of the growth and fall. of the leaf in perpetual summer, botanists in Java and Ceylon have been lately seeking new light on an old subject. At the Botanic Gardens at Buitenzorg, Prof, G. Srolkens has found the climate not quite uniform, as there is a periodicity in precipitation, relat- ive humidity and Insolation; and from. records of more than 100 tree species growing in the gardens, he has obtain- ed illustrations of nearly every kind of foliage behavior—some trees being regularly deciduous (accustomed to losing their leaves) once or twice a year, certain evergreens having mark- ed periodicity, and others having uni- form foliage gradually renewed throughout the year. He concludes that the leaf -fall is not due to the checking of activity by an excess of stored food, some unknown. internal action of the protoplasm seem- ing to him the primary cause. On the other 'hand, Prof. G. Klebs decides that, periodicity of plant habit is gov erned 'by periodicity of external con- ditions and that the supply of food materials may play a leading part. His conclusions are based partly on experimental altering of the period- icity. Trees .stripped several months be - tore the ,usual time have renewed their foliage and continued it during the season when they are usually bare; some deciducus European trees in . the tropics no longer wholly dropped their leaves at any season, • and, tropical trees of periodic habit have been made to ehange their period by varying the fertility of the soil. HOW THE SCRAP STARTED. xa".t°TE or vlwan'cxlta<NG. I"x+rfvinee of Ontario Is the Own+elr of Pricelefis Assets, The 1'rovinee of Ontario, Canada, says the Hon. W. II, Hearst, the Minister of Lands, Forests, atld Mines, ' is blessed with a little of everything to be found elsewhere with. the exception of coal, the lack' h mdup by Onrio' hyof drowhic•eleoistrric powae ta er systelxl, w3Zialls in time Will be utilized for heating purposes, as well 'ea lighting and power, One ounce in every seven of silver produced from the world's crust comes from Ontario, and there is abundant evidence that in New Ontario gold is to be found from Quebec on the east to Mani- toba on the west. Finny per cent. of tho mineral production of the Dominion comes from Ontario. Nearly one-half "of the timber ,;rut in the Dominion was from the for- ests in this Province. In New On- tario the value of the timber eould hardiv_ be estimated.. In the 'wa- ters of the north country there were over 2.000.000 horse -power within; a shortdistance of the Transcontie- entai Railway, and it is not a very great stretch of imagination to see in the near future timber mills operated by means of hydro-electr o power, The country was destined to become one of the greatest man- ufacturing centres on the continent of America,. The idea that land, in only a few of the priceless assets Northern Ontario was not suitable, for agricultural purposes was not correct. It was equal to - any soil in Canada for the production ` of grains of all kinds, These were of Ontario, You Can't Feat. It for Sore Joints, Rheumatism A Professional Dancer Proved it. Few men in his profession are bet- ter known than Mr. Thomas Hogan, of 27 Fortification Lane; Montreal, who writes:—"To limber up a stiff joint, to remove every sense of sore- ness frozn tired muscles I can tell you nothing compares with Nerviline. It is really a wonderful liniment, and I use it continually, simply because I find It keeps the muscles and joints' supple and entirely free from pain and stiffness. I earnestly recommend Ner- viline to every person that requires to use a strong, penetrating, pain -subdu- ing liniment. For Rheumatism Nerviline is a won- der; for Sciatica it cures where others fail; for Lumbago, stiffness and cold, nothing surpasses it. Keep. Nerviline handy—it's good to take inwardly, de- stroys internal pains quickly, and, is just as good for outward application. Large ,family size bottle, 50c.; small size, 25c., at all store keepers and drug- gists or The Catarrhozone Co., Buf- falo, N.Y. A Brute. Wife (at dinner)—"You don't seem to like the rice." Husband—"No it's associated with one of the greatest mistakes of my life." Jones :stepped on Smith's favorite corn and of course there was trouble, What Smith needed is Putnam's Corn Extractor —that :painless remedy for corns and warts that aures in twenty-four hours. Putnam's' is the only standby. Try it, 25o. at all dealers'. An Irishman once was travelling in a train with a friend, when two very stout ladies entered the ear- riage. They placed themselves one on each side of Pat. "Are you sure you are. comfortable, Pat?" the friend . asked. "Sure I haven't much room to grumble," was the reply: Minard's Liniment Cures Distemper. A Strange Pig. Five-year-old George had spent the summer in the country, where he was much interested in a neigh- bor's pig and cow. On his return to his city home he was asked what be liked in the country. "I liked Mr, Johnson's pigs best." "Ah 1 How many pigs has Mr. Johnson 1" "Two." ""What color are Mr. Johnson's pigs? igs ?„ "One pig is white." "What color is the other, pig?" "The other pig's a cow." Very Likely. "My tailor is beginning to dun nle`,rY "Suspects that you've done him, A umf0 "t vershoes Rinbbers and Over-Stiekings h One. , r.,er to Alton •nd taka an lett loll fookivetl—w.nrNgn. Mt Miossfef *amen s 4 oritidres. Dur Meld and i,sotaot yourself asd. tnmtI7 nom Moto iu.. CfMdtM Cee* 1l lalete Outtettle, Dads& Mature I,_ 1 Dealers "."-"""!-- Minard's Liniment Cures Diphtheria. Welsh Miners' Superstitions. Women, like rabbits, aro of ill - omen to the miner. In many places, particularly in Wales, if a pitman meets or sees a woman on his way to work, he will turn ,back; for such an encounter is held to forebode evil not oply to the man himself, but all his associates. At Oswes- try, some years .ago, a woman was employed as messenger by one of the collieries, and in the course of -1 her duties met many of the colliers on their way to work. The men im- mediately told the manager that they could not run the risk of ill - luck entailed in meeting a woman on the way to the pit, and threaten- ed to strike if she were not dis- missed.—London Chronicle. LIQUID SULPHUR cures RHEUMATISM by removing the cause. Impurities in the blood cause RHEUMATISM. LIQUID SULPHUR used according to direc- tions will purify the blood.- Try it. One bottle, Price 50 Cents, will con- vince you ,of its wonderful merits. On sale at all druggists, or send direct to LIQUID SULPHUR, 158 Bay Street, Toronto. Customer•Part my. hair in the middle, please. ]3arber -- Yessir, shall I split the odd one, sir? Minard's Liniment Cures Colds, Etc. Reasons for Excusing James. With an air of melancholy resig- nation, the truant stopped at the teacher's desk, and handed her the, following nate from his mother : Dear Sir: Please excuse James for not being present yesterday. Ile played truant, but you need- n't whip him for it, as the boy he played truant with and him fell out, and he licked. James; and a man they threw stones at ought - him and licked him ; and the driver of a cart they hung on to licked him; and the owner, of a, tat they chased licked him, Then I licked him when he cams home, after which his fa.. ther liekod him, and I had to give him another for being impudent to No for telling his father, • :So you need not liek him until this • next time. He thinks he will attend regular in future, Highest gradebeans kept'siehole and mealy by perfect: baking, '.. retaining their fuli.streugth. Playoreed with de1iciorta sauces. They have no equal. E'A3rCATION. '1yj11aDIOTT 'f t3ITSTX.S5 cnt,LI.: T'O costes,. 'C"rrt,ada,a Ft*. 'o,r remmatt, elil f±rjlr,nl. .•ifataniflorrrt •ene,:lr , Ora RMI Fera sato. H.' w. DAWtON, NInety Cglbor",si 5trgtt, ITero.,fe,, _ s T I' YOU WA NT ro env, slit fant,b t J Prnit,flrain, riairv. r'erza,tt. arae 5 W, Th'i pot,, 1 iunoptort; or 9i Cnlhnrr,n pf : Tono,tfo, H W. DAWSON. Colborne St, NEWSPAPCpt FOR SAu_E. XTFwAPAPED AND JOB OFFI('E I191 11��I Greeenlreret.. ProprlPtor b -lure n1 r1'rner,r?pf, i"a sushi' to sive 'the prtni•tng o fllre the tOdr.otic, nA^gsearv. and nffere ft for sale at a. sacrifice. No ennnaiti*5. One of , tha boat news^*aroAr mn• 1tinu' lu t'" Prort—e for „ prnrtirul znr" 411114 [trtloon 1%nT,Tfu'++,I-�,v r'nm..�ti�,.. h,nr,,.ntn., WANTED, rvltl vn>"a(i. Vi*T' 1101.0 11:,.kLTEN. J Reid RNAs.. Bothwell, Ont. 1 vE 131J i .TUI;; BED MIN, 1ti'C &'STEN °,,.1 I.4 and Fisher. W D. hates. Ridgetowu. Oat, • ^ ?141i T'1t*Tr'5 POSTS. OTTOTE DF. lin red Bothwell. Reid Bros., Both- well, Ont. MIstrt t A Vefitea G(ANCETt TUMORS. LUMPS, ETO.. Internal and external, eured wf'h not pain by our home treatment. rife, no hefnre ton lnt.., 1)r. 13orrman iT tiooi t ALL STONES, SIDNEY AND RLAD• • 7f der Atones. Kidney trouble. Gra vs), Lumbago and kindred ailments peail:tr„11 cured with the new German remedy, "Hanoi." price 't 1.56. Another new re' led* for Diabetes-M..411ton, end sure cure, tr "Ranol'a Anti-1)labeter." Primes p2.t10 freni, druggists or, direct. The Aanol „fin - tering r.omnent ,of 'Canada, Lin! ?red. . Winnir^eg. 'Man. PRODUCERS -By shipping your NEW LAID EGGS - to GUNN, LANGLOIS ik CO., LIMITED, MONTREAL, you. secure tete BEST RESULTS. One trial shipment recoananrnd^d: no FOUR STOCKINGS SIIR DefK front washing and hurt you? Do the children complain? The IDEAL SrOGif1NC STRETCHERS rte make old' stockings feel and. wear like new, relieve tired feet. ease corns andsave darn- ing. Two sixes, adult and child - YORK a CO.,'$ noir by OE. nt Waif! "In some parts of Brazil there are birds With bills a yard long," said the tall man. • "What do they call them?" ask- ed the short man. • "Plumber birds," replied the tall man. TAKE NOTicE. We publish, simple.: straight tastim•oni- fits, _not press' press' "agents' interv;ews, from. well - people. Froin "ail over Azncr,ca they te,Uif;, to the merits of: MD ARD'S I,INTIMENT, the best of Household Remedies, MINAR+D'S T,INXSfONT CO.,""I,IhiITvi3. Merely Prud enee► Hub.: How could you go and order that expensive uecklece? Don't you know how I'm fixed 1 Wife—Yes, but I don't want other people to know haw you're fixed,' Minard's Liniment Cures' Cargct in Cows. The Conqueror's Return. "I: was rather embarrassed," the amateur bunter confessed. "Why so ?'' "When I got back to camp after my first day out the fellows greeted me by singing, 'See the Conquer- ing Hero Comes.: Arid all I had done was shoot off my guide's left ear." A giri'•s 'idea. of an affinity is the first man who proposer.