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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Exeter Advocate, 1890-12-4, Page 2The Attldavit Liar.. The melte liar and the Ash liar, both bowed in their gray old ago, Jaws travelling; back from their journeys wide, from their earth -wide pilgrimage ; A„tear dro}t stood iu the spa a liar's eye, and the fish bar groaned in paha, And a death -lite lock of infinite grief same over the face of the twain. I cannot compete with the modern liar,” the sad -eyed snake liar said, " its limitless length and breadth and depth, and t wish that T were dead For I stand rebuked with a shat,^o-faced look 'heath the triuuaphwut!;azo of the eye Of the newspaper affidavit liar, with his =mils: tion lie, 'For the snake liar and the fish liar and the horse liar own his sway, And the easy-going liars who work by the job, and the liars who work, by the day, The tru,velll .g liar, old inhabitant liar, and liars M. low degree, And liars who lie for the fun of the thing, and liars who lie or a fee. " The horse liar, the poach -crop liar, the sea - serpent liar and all, With the wide, untr,vel, ed wastes of cheek and their soulless seas of gall,, All bend the knee to the fieepterod sway or this crowned and peerless one, And the father of lies looks tenderly down on his most accomplished sun I" —Printers' Ink. The Ked -haired Girl. Chicago Post : Oh I golden looks of yellow Co attractive to a Yellow, So full of light and loveliness our vision to be- guile ; Dame Fashion has decreed it And it follows you must heed it, Her latest sweeping verdict is that you are out of style. Henceforth though we adore you We eau no more bow before you ; You cannot in the future hold au undisputed sway. For fashion now expresses Preference for darker tresses, Tour golden hue's a chestnut now, you're out of date, paste. "LAST CENTURY LOVERS" A Tale of title American Revolhltion. CHAP PER IT. In a few momeuts a negro girl who had been bustling in and oat ot the room, bear- ing various hot dishes, announced supper. As soon as they were seated Mies Clemen- tina entered and took her place, without saying a word, at the head of the table. Her face was strong in its individuality and expression of commend. Years of an- thority had intensified the natural mason• line element in her temperament and countenanoe, with its long upper lip alightly shaded, dark, heavy eyebrows overhengine piercing and restless blank eyes. Her grizzled hair curled high above her narrow, bony forehead, and her large figure was clad in a mannishredingote furnished with huge horn buttons, end finished at the throat with a man's white cravat. In her presence Miss Barbara effaced her own personality, and sat, a pale little apparition, studying her younger sister's mood, which seemed not a very happy one this evening, for she tapped her fingers on the board in a preoccupied manner. Miss Bab poured out the tea, and the !Meal preoeeded silently. Betty was gazing absently at ber plate, absorbed in anxious cogitations about the party. Miss Stacy, who, in common with the rest of the neighborhood, stood in salutary awe of "Clementine Vaughen'e vagaries," silently sipped the contents of her cup. " Too much sager, Mise Bab," she said softly, passing np her Dnp. " Please put in more sea." She took another draught and passed it up again : "More cream, please." This was repeated several times. " We': " she said, aloud, "I can even be moderate and drink only one cup of this tea, despite its, being so !regent and grate- ful." " Teel " exclaimed Miss Clem, in a voioe which was a surprise, so deep and sweet was it ; "tea 1 Why, Anastasia Anderton, you'll get no tea in this house, I'll warrant. This is sage tea. I never think the weak wash myself." "Lnd," said Mies Staoy, glibly, trying to change the unfornnate eabjeot, "did yon •hear what happened to the brig Peggy Stew- art that brought Torn Rozier over 2 It had some packages of tea on board, and Mr. Anthony Stewart, the owner, paid the duty ; but the people raised such a hubbub about it, oallea a meeting, and made Mr. Stewart apologize and born the vessel—set fire to it with a toroh and burned the fine ship. Such another blaze and fuss about a few packages of refreshing tea 1 Hard enough to get too, Lord knows 1" Miss Clem east a withering glance on her. " Think of the principle involved, and not of your stomach, Anastasia. I hear that some base scale, eabmitting to the ex- tortions imposed upon us by our blood- sucking tyrants, have paid the tax and tetauggled tea into the country ; but I'll .ave none of it in my house. You can go to the houses of enoh creatures as Mr. Wilmer and Bob Rozier, things that are neither Whig nor Tory, ' nor fish, nor flesh, nor good red herring,' if yon wish to find the detestable weed ; but not on the table of one who loves liberty. So lot me hear no more of tea 1" Mies Bab felt very guilty et the subter- fuge ehe had practised to procure her favor- ite and proscribed beverage, whioh the ladies in the neighborhood were in the habit of absent-mindedly extracting from a concealed caddy in Mr. Atkins' store ; leaving a bonus on the counter, or diffusing the equivalent among more innocent articles on the bill, in order to elude the :myrmidons of the State Convention. This was not an auspicious prelude to the wonld.be petitioner, whose whole soul was engaged in wily plans for the fulfilment of her hopes. " I hear, ' said Miss Clem severely, "that woitbless Bob Rozier is going to give his son an assembly on Thursday night." Betty pursed up her red lips, and looked dreamingly at the partrait of her grand. father's peruke. "You have received an invitation ; do yon want to go, Elizabeth ? Do you want to go to the house of that man, who has no principles of political or personal honesty—as he evinced in the affair of the brindle cow ? " Betty lowered her gaze to her aunt's curls. ," Why, .Aunt Clam, of course I do. I want to dance and meet the neighbors, and not stay shut up all my life like a -a-- 81ave in an Eastern harem." "Fie, fie, unhappy child 1" faltered Miss Bab " where do you pick up these equiv- ocal` allusions ? Clementine, this comes of allowing her to read every book in the bookoase." "Forward minx l " exclaimed Miss Clem, "yon shall go. It shall not be said that I keep Edward Vaughen'e orphan child se- questered from the world, and will not takeamort dhow her to her place g ate gayeties. ' Barbara, yeti shall go too. I'll not set my foot' in that house. No doubt the aon'e ' a chip of the old block'a worthless boy he was, over here from morning till night, keeping hawks hidden id the cabby Land feeding them my chickens." " Why, aunt, they were falcons and he Was the Nattier and a the lady of the castle." "aoked Mise what will shoe weer? Stacy; " T am to wear my new red petti' goat and eaoque trimmed with earoenet ribbons " I'll stand no outlay of money on your gewgaws," said Mise Clem, gontee:tom oualy ; it is too hard to get now, To. morrow, go to the big carved chest in the ball, and eeleot any one of your mother's brocades, to be made over in the mode; and you oan get Mrs. Wilmer's blank Suean—I hear she's a first-rate milliner—but no out- lay." " Did you see the lovely gown worn at church last Sunday by Miss Ramsay, of Philadelphia, staying at the Pace's ? " asked Miss Staoy. " That was style, the way she handled her emelliagsalts, so daintily 1 She'll be at the party, and some- thing fine to see." " I was trying to hear dear Dr. Well's sermon," said Miss Beb. " I saw her," atiewered Miss Clem ; '" a mincing girl fool, with her fine lady airs." Ob, aunt," pleaded Betty, " mayn't -I have my hair built up by the barber from. Annapolis, and get a new set of cherry rib- bons and feathers to wear with the white brocade ? " ", No," thundered Miss Clem ; " you must think I have a mint of money to waste on fol -de -role. You'd be a fine fool with your hair piled up like the tower of Babel, and emeered with bear's grease, and fur. bisbed up like a bird's nest with rage and bite of finery. Wear your own pretty red. carie "—Betty winced—" and 1'11 warrant you'll be sweeter than any monkeyish city miss. Of all the insane ideas that ever visited the poor, weak brains of the female kind, this top-heavy mania is the worst, Let Anastasia follow the lead if ehe choose, and Bab, no doubt, will want ber pick wool decked out ; but you are a minor and under my care, and yon shall not," " Then 1'11 not go," said Betty. " I'll not go to be floated at by strangers as a country guy.) "Don't then. 'Cut off your nose to spite your face.' ' The table was cleared, and Amanda brought in a pan of hot water to Mies Bar- bara, who always washed the tea-servioe herself, allowing no sacrilegious hand to imperil her precious china. She made one enoeption in favor of Mies Stacy, who, in a long dimity apron, the fee -simile of that which inveeted Miss Bab's slight form, deftly handled the dieh-oloth. Mies Clem seated herself with account - book, pen and ink at the other end of the table, and Betty retired from an unfeeling world to the west window, where, shut in by the red moreen curtains, she could lean her forehead against the glees and mope unseen. Miss Bab and Miss Stacy kept up a low whisper, aoeompanpied by the clatter of the china, and the quill soratohed loudly over the paper. Beside the faint gleam of the stars there was no light to be seen outside, save that of Lord's Gift, shining across the dark expanse of the creek stretching between. Profoundly disappointed that ebe was not to attend the party, Betty determined that she would not make her appearance unless screened from notice by absolute conformity to the exist- ing style ; for she bad an inkling as to the opinions in the neighborhood of the " oddities of the Vaughan " in general, and Mies Clem in particular, whioh had aerved to estrange them from many of their connections. She wondered whether Tom was the same dare -devil, lovable fellow ; whether he would like her, or they would see much of each other. Then, indignant at Miss Clem's tantrums, she tapped restlessly on the pane. " Cease that exhibition of your wicked temper," said Mise Clem's voice, breaking her reverie. " Come forward snaky girl, and say goodnight to Mies Anastasia." Miss Anastasia departed, enveloped in mantle and hood, escorted by a negro boy with a lantern. "Well," said Mies Clem, as Boon as the door was closed, taking up her stand with her back to the fire, "yon are two wise- acres to start any manner of disoassion before that woman, the greatest tittle- tattle and gossip in the neighborhood, and each a natural as I have rarely Been ; with her ' gauze ribbons ' forsooth, and her gabble a la mode. Old Dr. Anderton's daughter, too, a man whom my dear, de. parted father— " " God rest hie soul," said Miss Bab, wip- ing ber eyes. " Stop sniffling. Barbara, he's dead. We've all got to die, but what's the nee of oryiug ? There's where women make me sick, with their eternal weep, weep. We're all fools, and I would that I had been born a man." " I am sure, Clem," said Miss Bab, " you're as clever he any man." Mies Clem made no immediate reply, bat broke out a few seconds later in a slow, sweet voice : " God knows we are all mad, wasting our lives on gewgaws and trumpery affairs, when we are to die and rot—and I am the maddest of all ! Child, what will you do, go or stay ? " "Aunt," said Betty, coming near end speaking firmly—there was a strange re- semblenoe in the two voices, Betty's leaking the oocasional harehnese—" I will not go unless I can take my right plane among the other gentry, and look ea becomes yonr niece." " And all this friss about a mare's nest atop of your head. You have the very Vaughan etnbborn will, and I like yon not the lees for being the very moral of what I was when a girl, though better looking— not that looks are here or there when the end comes. What am I, to set my face against the world ? Be young and silly, and pile your hair a mile high on your empty noddle. Good -night." She took a lighted Dandle and left the room. Betty caught Miss' Bab around the weiet and danced off with her, panting and tremulous. '" Oh, Bab," ehe said, after an embrace whioh knocked that demure little perecn's mob -cap on one side, giving her a rakish aspect, isn't the white brocade going to look sweet ? See how I will make myoonl:tesy to Miss Rozier. And how fine yon will look in your brown brocade, dancing the reel with fat Dr. Wells." Betty, he's a clergyman 1" " Oh, then maybe he won't reel, but per. form a olorical pas soul, like this." • You are a wicked child, making funof a poor withered old--" " Darling," interrupted Betty,kissing tend taking up her ndle for her again, g bed. CHAPTER III. The door and windows were open, and the cheery autumn sunlight streamed in on the bare rafters, where hung strings of pep. pert and onions, circling with et nimbus Betty's head and glowing cheek as ehe atood on the hearth at one side of the huge fireplace, where logs blazed under a skillet filled with et mysterious mixture, which he stirred with a long stink. "Miss Betty," eaidthe old man, appeal- ing to a higher authority, "jos' fetch me my pipe, honey' ; she won't lemma come in." Betty and Amanda were both stifling their mirth, "Don't yer walk on my floor, chile; Moses lain )es' do widout, or he kin fly over. Yoe, must be most good',tuff ter fly, wid yer preaohin's an' gellivantin'e wid do debil, like a ,held nigger ,tar all de world, spite 0' yo' priviigea o' consortia' wid de gentry.,' Jes' fly, Inoses." On the other side sat Mammy Lar, Betty's old nurse, who reigned supreme in these precincts. They were on an island, for between them and the door was a flood of suds and water, where Amanda, on her hande and knees, was sorobbing the boards in a manner which would have been quite unsat- iefaetory to Mammy Lar, had not her atten- tion been absorbed iu a marital squabble with Uncle Moses, standing in the door.' "Jes' lemma ootne in an' get pipe," he pleaded ; " it's np dar on de jamb. ,Don't yer walk over tat floor, Moses. Don't yer see whtir Mandy'e 'zirtin' her efforts fur ter glean it ? Lawe sakes, gal, is dat all de bee' you kin scrub ? Put more elbow.grease in yo' work an' make dens boards shine, or I 'low I'll lam yer. Don't yer conte in, dat's all, don't-yer—tome— n," slowly and warningly. " I'il dome an' git it," said Moses, goaded to extreme measures. " E f yer come, I`ll scald yer, mare's pop The consequences were averted by Miss Clem, who, hearing the loud words, entered with all the majesty of the law, striding ruthlessly with muddy boots morose the debatable ground. " What's all this hubbub? " she demanded, " For shame, Mammy, give. the old man his pipe." Then, spying the mysterious oaldron and Betty's flashed Lace : " What in heaven's name is that. roses? " " This is a compound of simples and herbs whioh I am preparing,' said Betty, wish an attempt at dignity. " What for? What are yon going to do with it?" Betty laughed, and faltered something about "freokles." " Humph 1 That's it, is it ? A me metio! Some of Anastasia Anderton's poisonous recipes, I'll be bound." She took the saucepan and poured its contents out of the window, " Yonr complexion is good enough ; it would doubtless have taken the skin off, and lett yon flayed for the party. Don't get suoh maggots in your brain, or you'll be another crazy Vaughan." She departed as suddenly as she had appeared, leaving Betty gazing ruefully at the empty saucepan. " Laws sakes," said Mammy Lar, reflectively, " I can't help making greet 'miratione at Mies Clem, she's such a sopeele character " 1'or several days the wide bells upstairs had been the scene of busy dressmaking, where two negro girls, under the direction of Mrs. Wilmer's Susan, bed been working upon Betty's gown, whioh was at length completed. Betty was in a fever of excitement, which reached its climax at the arrival of the bar- ber, upon horeebaok, bringing with him the atenails to put the Drowning finish to the toilet. She was enveloped in a sheet to protect her gown, and then, before the dressing• table, the barber, or, as he called himself, the coiffeur des dames, completed his fearfal and wonderful edifice. The hair was drawn, with two rows of puffs on either aide, over a tall cushion, the whole smeared with pomatum, powdered, and surmounted with frills ot lace, bows of cherry ribbon, and two cherry ostrich tips. l'hen the baiber, who was a Frenchman, with the manner of a courtier, crossed his hands on his heart, bowed, and said :" C'est accompli; Mademoiselle estcharmante." The doors were thrown open, and a group of dark faces beamed admiration upon Betty as ehe stood, like a statue being unveiled, stately, andoonsoione of her head- gear. Her robe of white brocade was draped over a quilted cherry, hooped petticoat, and her beautiful white throat, erect and well poised, under its towering structure, rose from a cloud of delicate lane, whioh also shadowed over the rounded arms. There was a murmur of admiration. Mammy Lan came in and surveyed] her from head to foot. " Thar won't be a pueson that kin hold' a candle ter my chile. Honey, yer jea' too sweet ter live ; somebody jos' ought ter take yer and bury yer 'live." " Well—well—well," murmured Mies Stacy, who was to accompany them. "Aio't she sweet? I think we'll out quite a tolerable figure." " Don't you and Beb look like prodigious idiots 1 'e laughed Miss Clem, adding to Mise Bab'a discomfiture. wbo looked ready to sink with timidity and the weight of her commode. Mise Stacy was beaming with smiles, and had planed, after a fashion of some years past, between her rouge and eyebrow, a black patch, elaborately cat to repreeent a ship under full sail. Lord's Gift, the Rozier piece, though a short distance across the water, was ten miles' journey by road, so Mitts Clem hur- ried them off before eaneet, Uncle Moses. in a green livery, wee seated on the box of the large, lumbering coach, while one negro boy acted as postilion, and another rode before on horseback bearing a lantern, to open the gates and light the muddy roads, Betty's head -gear being the tallest, ehe was allowed the whole back seat, where she est, and held her head obliquely to avoid knock- ing against the top of the ooaah. The two ladies kept up a perpetual chat- ter about chickens and preserves, while she watched night deepen in the fleeting woods, here and there a home light, or the gleam of stars in some forest pool. The half dreamy state she had fallen into, lulled by the monotony of the creaking vehicle and the low voices, was broken by the oeasation of locomotion, and the bright lights from the open door of Lord's Gift ; but she bad not fully awakened until she found herself in the dressing -room, where they were divested of their wraps by the assistance of two negro maids. The mesio sounding from below made Betty impatient to enter the ball -room, but there were numberless touches to be given to Miss Staoy's toilet. The ship having sailed away from the rouge, she took out a email pillbox, and extracted thence two elaborate fac•similea, with one of whioh she decorated herself, and the other Betty's white forehead, before they descended to the parlor. There they made their way at once to Mrs. Rozier, standing near the door. The look of condescension on her ;aniline feat. ores, and her affability, oppressed Betty, who was dazzled by the glare of the many wax tapers, the hum of voices, and the bright gowns and coats of the groups around h her. A hundred g ndred fears and mit ivin a assailed ed her. Everything was so fine, so like fairy - lend. She was certain that she was looking ugly, and that she would not have a pleas- ant time. Dr. Wella, panting in a tight, new black snit and clerical neokaloth, had engaged Miss Bab and Miss Staoy in con-. vereation. Across the room, a young lady on a sofa was the centre of a oirole of gentlemen. She was tall and blonde, arrayed in silver brocade in the latest fashion, and oonapio- nous by having, on top of the structure built above her haughty face, a parogaet of the moat brilliant colors. Betty' watobed her with interest as she 000aeonally inhaled a bottle of salla. e That is Mien Ramsay, of Philadelphia," said M.ro- Rosier, girl, very oharming, and her countenance her Will, she's fan arrant flirt ; promised betokening enoh truly feminine and gentle sensibility. She is talking with Tom, who is vastly smitten." She wee looking up into the f ace of a tall, broad -shouldered young fellow in. bine vel. vet and gold lane, with, a white embroidered, waistooat, who Leaned over her with an air of devotion, and must hive said something very pleasant, for she tapped him on the sleeve with her fan, Baying " Ohl fie l fie ! What an arrant rogue ! Ile turned, and catching Mrs. Rosier's eye, Dame across the room at her nod. Betty was. surprised at his appearance. His 'regular features were stern, his eye brown straight and decided, and the mouth. fall and rather large. He was handsome, doubtlessly, bat not like the old, merry - faced Tom. g "This is Miss Elizabeth Vaughan, Tom," said hie mother, " Whom you must remora. bar quite well." Betty was diegnsted that he should have been called to speak to her. She imagined that the low, grave bow he made was one .of polite impatience at having to leave Mies Ramesy for a country girl. She swept him a stately little courtesy. Of course, I remember my little play- mate, though you have grown prodigiously, i' faith." " That is very natural," said Betty, coldly, some demon of perversity prompting her ; then she shut her lips tight and re• reedited silent. He should not think she was trying to keep him from Mies Ramsay. How is Mise Vaughan 2 " he asked. "" My aunt enjoys excellent health, I thank yon." " And is the dog alive that we used to call Cassius, because he had a 'lean and hungry look' ? " " He is still alive, but quite fat now." " Good heaven 1" she thontyht, "how in- sipid he mast think me. He can go back to hie Mise Ramsay." " That is quite gratifying," he said, gravely. Looking up, Betty caught a merry flash of his dark eyes, but his features remained impaesive. Oh, he is laughing at the Provincial Mise," she thought. "Have yon seen Will Ringgold yet?" he asked. ""No ; is he' here 2 " maintaining her taciturn precedent, though disgusted with herself. " That is he, yonder, the macaroni talk. ing to the youngest Mies Paoa." The young man he indicated was short, with a slight figure, arrayed in a red -silk coat, with a peach -bloom satin waistcoat. His features were delicate, and on his cheeks there was an evident soupgon of rouge. " He is monstrous genteel," said Betty. "Egad 1 nothing if not that ; bat some- one should tell him that in the provinces no one wears a red coat but a creole or a dancing -master. He will want to meet you, for he hes been asking for yon, and I did not know you had come. Let me fetch him." " What a hurry to get away," thought Betty. Mr. Ringgold advauoed with his hand over hie heart, making a low bow. He held a quizzing•giass in the other hand, through which he stared impertinently, saying, with a simper of affeoted surprise : " Parbleau 1 Ie this the same little girl with whom I once played, or one of Diana's nymphs strayed into human revelries ? Oh! speak, nymph, I prey." Hie voice had a drawl whioh, in addition to hie conscious starts and poses, combined to make him such an extraordinary figure to Betty that she quite forgot her role of indifference and looked at Tom gniokly, when a glance of veiled amusement pasaed between them. "Pardi 1 he continued, " I dream. Have I Dome from Paris, the centre of the globe, to find in this remote spot a paragon of beauty and grace? I am your serviteur tres humble. You have wounded me with one glance of those eyes toes brilliants. Command me, I am yours, adorable and charmante being. Betty was streak dumb by this torrent of words, end amazed at her first glimpse of the fashionable affectation of the day, whioh was Franoomania. Tom bowed and exonsing himself, re- turned to Mise Ramsay, who hid summoned him with a wave of her fan. '"Suppose l should take you at year word ? " said Betty. '"Since you are mine, I command you to tell me all about your. self and what you expected to find in ' this remote spot.' " " Ah, mon Dieu 1 What is there to tell ? After a happy existence in that adorable capital of the greatest nation in the world, a life full of pleasure—ei debonnaire —to be banished to this spot, where there is not even a decent hairdreaser. Why, adorable creature, they cannot dress hair even in that dreary island, England. Nowhere, no- where, save in la belle Prance. Ma foi I Am I not an ingrate to bewail my lot 2 Have I not found on this desert shore une ange—belle et riante— " To frown at pleasure, and to smile in pain" with the oharming inconsistency of your sex.—Smile, prithee, smile 1 How sur- passing fair you would look in a French dress." He olosed his eyes and seemed lost in an eostaoy of ima- gination, " I protest, yon an't conceive what an addition a French dress would be to your beauty." Betty had by this time fully obeyed his injunction to smile, and was dimpling with amusement. ""Sere," she said, with a simple stare, " you see me et my beat. You should see how we dress here in the provinces every day. I wear deerskin and feathers like the Indians--" "No, now, do you ? How droll and degagee i 'Pon honor, how fair you must look What is your temperament now— give a hint to an adorer—ere you molting or severe ?" ""It is the same as that inscribed on the tombstone of my great•annt, buried in Limerick : ' Here lies the body of Lady Honorie O'Rourke. She was passionate, pions and deeply devout, and painted in water -colors ; of such is the kingdom of: heaven.'" Pardi I " he cried, " you are sprightly enough 1 Your lips barb the arrows shot from those heavenly orbs." Through the door of the next room, where the older people were engaged at cards, advanced Mr. Rozier, rubicund and pompons. " Well, well, here' is my charming young neighbor grading our social evening. Good evening, dear child. ,I'faith,!t there waa not so many people' around I would avail myself of the privilege o liming your nr blooming cheek. So ranch for being an old man. Now, Will, despite your superior attractions, could not claim that. Age hal its compensations." Bettyheld out her hand to the gentle. man, owhom she was very fond, despite the absurd fend which waged between him and Miss Clem, based upon some trifling canal which both had forgotten. He bent over it, saying," May I 2 " "' Ile that will not when he may, When he will, he shall have nay, laughed Betty " Have you seen my boy, Betty ? " ho asked. "Here, I'll gall him here. No? Yon don't want to see him ? Why, isn't be pretty enough lad ? Wee there's no She is a most engaging ptotaing theme yeung misses. Don't treat me last ,summer she'd came over to play obese, and never has come -an arcane flirt." " My flirting is like my cheas-playinge' said Belly. "' In both I only act on the de. fenaive, and never ovary war into the enemy's uerters." "" Ha 1 ha ! laughed Mr. Rozier, loudly. Miss Bab, who was etanding near, looked around and smiled proudly, withdrawing her attention from De Wells, who was oleo- trifying Miss Stacy by a narrative about a oow which, to usehie words," pat her head. into the window and roared, ma'am, roared like a Numidian lion ! " (To be Cantina A Stroke of Lightning. So long as women will be foolish men will be deceptive. One day I sat behind a couple on an Ohio and Missisaippi train, and it wasn't ten minutes before 1 discovered that the girl was a village belle who knew nothing of the world, and that her oom- panion was a traveller who saw in her a victim. Several others noticed them as well, but it was hard to eec how anything could ba done. He professed great admir- ation for the girl, and she blushingly queried : " But how do I know you aro not a mar- ried man ?" " Oh, but I assure you on my honor that am not." " Where do you live?" " In Louisville." " And you have neither wife nor chil- dren 2" " No." At that instant the conductor came in with a telegram and called out the addrees. " That's for me," said the man in the seat ahead. It was handed to him, and he was smil- ing as he tore it opened. Next moment he fell forward in te heap and rolled into the aisle in a dead faint. Halt a dozen of us, including the girl, read the diepatoh. It was dated at Indianapolis and read : " Your wife and baby burned up with the house last night. Come at woe." It took us a quarter of an hoar to bring him to, and it was half an hoar later when he left the train. He had forgotten the girl who shared his seat, and she was orouohed down and crying like a baby.— New York Sun. The Turf., Mit. WM. HENDRIE MARES PURCHASES. At the sale of Mr. W. L. Soott's horses in the Panorama building, New York, on Thursday, the two-year-old chestnut colt Bolero, by Rayon d'Or—All Hands Around by War Dance, was bought by Philip Dwyer for $35,000, being the highest price ever paid in Amerioa for a two-year-old. All the horses sold well, the record standing in this shape : Twelve two and three-year• olds, $63,050 ; average, $5,254. Nineteen yearlings, $34,100 ; average, $1,637. Grand total, $94,150. Grand average, $3,037. Mr. Hendrie, of Hamilton, president of the Ontario Jockey Olnb, bought Versatile, b. o., two years, by Rayon d'Or—Valleria, by Gleneig or Virgil, for 8900 and a yearling bay colt by Zorilla—Underanst, by Brown Bread, for $575. Charley Boyle bought a couple of yearlings for Toronto parties ; Rabeile, ob, f., by Rayon d'Or—Blue Grate Belle, by War Dance, for $750, and Queen, bay 1., by Uhlan—Qaeen T., by Great Tom, for 8400. Ilea highest prioed yearlings were : Entre, oh. o., by Rayon d'Or—Ella T., by War Dance, for whioh A. F. Walcott paid $5,500, end Bordeaux, b. o., by Algerine—Bordeleise, by Brown Bread, for whioh J. E. Macdonald paid $5,150. Two other Rayon d'Or oolte, Marine and Coxswain, fetohed $3,500 and 83,050 respectively. Crop Estimates. The crop of winter and spring wheat for 1890, as estimated by the United States Government bureau, is402,000,000 bushels, which with wheat and fluor estimated at 40,000,000 bushels on July let makes a total of 442,000,000. The amount required for home use is 256,000,000 bushels, and for Beed and other nice amounts making the total 326 000,000 bnahels- This leaves 116,- 000,000 bushels available for export. The wheat in sight last Saturday was 44,132,000 bushels, being an increase of 3,361,000 bushels over the previous week, and a decrease of 646,000 compared with a year ago. Would Amend the Decalogae. Chicago Notes : All attempts to interview Mr. Hayes, proved futile. He has the faculty of avoiding interrogations by get- ting behind a bulwark of cold and fixed stares. To an Evening News reporter, who fired questions at the ex•president for.fif- teen minutes, Mr. Hayes replied : " You have heard the etory credited to the ' Old Roman,' Thurman. He is said to have said at one time : ' Had I the power to amend the ten commandments, I would add another : Let all interviewers be killed.' " A Misapprehension. New York Mirror: Mies Terriut—When mommer and I were in Yurrop, ob, the awfulest thing happened 1 There was a prince --and a count—and—and they fought a duel—about poor me—with pistols. Yabeley—Ah ! were they loaded? Miss Terriut—No they weren't. They were just as sober as oonid be. Depend on the Pitcher. Rooheater Herald : The woman who offered to kiss Snead, the faster, was denied the privilege by the watchers. These fellows are medical college students and know what they are about. The little Italian could live an extra week on a kiss delivered right over the plate. A little 4.year-old girl in England writes with her left hand and writes her words baokward, as they are reflected in a mirror from ordinary writing. Her friends have to read them by means of a loolting•glase. The highest church spire in the world has jnet been completed. It is that of the cathedral at Olm, Wurtemburg, Germany, and is 530 feet high. The top of the cross on the dome of St. Peter's, Rome, is 448 feet above the pavement. In the treaenry of the sultan of Turkey is a gold cradle, studded with diamonds. It is kept under guard in Constantinople, and in it a dozen sultans have been rooked. Age for age, girls aro taller in Sweden and heavier as well, At ;the recent festivities commemorating the centenary of the foundation of Odessa, a rage on velocipedes was on the programme This gave groat offence to a pritst named Sewelkoff, who preached a special sermon against tide innovation, whioh he deolered to be "the devil's sport." Repent information gathered by the Ger. man forestry commission assigns to the pine tree 500 and 700 years as the maxi- mum, 425 years to the silver fir, 275 years to the larch, 245 years to the red beech, 210 to the aspen, 200 to the birch, 170 to the ash, 145 to the aider, and 130 to the elm. One of the greatest problems of the future is thought to be the transformation of oarbon energy into light upon the semi prineiplo that the giow.worm end' fire -fly give their light. H[C DUN= 0 HAS [D NIw1[r1C, On the Verge of the G Gallows ' s, eaves H !tt Mother's [t'canals; The recent death in Canada of Mrs Sterling, mother of Charles M,: Sterlingo who was executed at Youngetoo, 0., for the murder of Lizzie Grombaeher, has unveiled the facts concerning ase incident that 000urred shortly before hie execution.. His mother carne here from Maxwell, Canada, and though he had left home! when but a lad, with maternal intuitions she reoognized him. When brought to his. Dell, Stirling, without the quiver of a muscle, said : "You are mistaken, madam; I am not your son." She implored him to recognize her, but he refused, and ehe returned home half oonvinoed that she was mistaken. To his counsel. Sterling said: " She is my mother, but I could not break her heart by telling her that her son would be hung. Keep it secret until she. dies." Her death the past week caused hie attorney, W. S. Anderson, to Wreak theseat of silence to -day. " It was the most dramatic scene I ever witnessed," said Mr. Aodereon. " I have seen all the tragedians of the peat quarter of a century, bat none that compared to the scene on that occasion. The mother, every line in her face showing the most intense suffering, and her heart nearly broken, while the SOD, knowing that the truth would kill her, stood like a statue,, his face showing the pallor of death, assuring her that she was mistaken. Stroh intensity of action was never produced on. any stage. It could not be."—Cincinnati Enquirer. Japan's animate. Sir Edwin Arnold says of the climate of Japan, in the December " Soribner'a" " Really it rains tar too frequently in thin otherwise oharming Japan, and one can indeed scarcely expeot any permanent dry weather except in autumn. Every wind seems to bring rain -Blonde up from the encircling Paoifio to break upon the ever- green peaks of Nippon ; while in winter, so great is the influence of the neighboring Arctic oirole, with its cold currents of air and water, that Christmas in Sta-Shiu-- which lies in the same latitude as the mouths of the Nile—sees the themometer sometimes below zero. Exoept for certain, delioioua periods of the year, one cannot honestly praise the climate of Japan ; but: it has certainly divine caprices ; and when the sunshine does unexpectedly Dome, dur- ing the chilly and and moist months, the light is very splendid, and of a peculiar silvery tone, and the summer days are golden." The Sarcastic Telephone Girl. Lewiston Journal : A " telephone girI'r who knows suggests these rules for people who nee the telephone : "It you have a telephone in your office or store ring up ' central' and then go and wait on a one- tomer. AIways speak in an undertone in order to make ' central' oak what you want. If she does not hear you tell her to 'wake up' or ' take the cotton oat of her earls: Pat your ' plug' in before a storm and be sure not to take it out again but go around to the central office and offer to liok the whole telephone company for neglect of duty. Take your time in answering your bell, or, what is better; do not anweer it at all, but in about half an hour ring up and ask who called you, and get mad if central has forgotten who it was. She has nothing else to do but remember. A Woman's Katy Time. Oswego Times: Married women would do well to paste in their scrap books the following statistics relative to woman's work: In one year a woman gets dinner 365 times, washes the dishes 1,095 times, gets the ohildren ready for eohool twice a day for 180 days, gets the baby to sleep 1,460 times and makes about 300 calls. Who says a woman has nothing to do? He Got a Job. Brooklyn Life : " Alt, good morning f'r said the early bird to the worm. "Looking for a job ?" "That's what. Anything I aan do for yon ?" " Yes, you'll about fill the bill, I think:" He Was Cute, S1,0 Was Outer. As sly as a fox was he, and she As soft as the dainty dove, And so he wro.e her a bushel of notes That spoke of his deathless love Bat he wrote them all with a fading ink, And tiros she had been deceived If she hadn't, in f•+ct photographed them all. As fast as they were received. Moro Ilion That. New York Netts : " Sharp, what ails you ? Yon look es if you had lost fifty pounds of flesh since 1 naw you last." " Fifty pounds ! Don't mock at a man's misery. 1 have lost 800 pounds of flesh: I bet a Jersey cow on Scott." Had His Uhoice, Buffalo News Mother—Johnny, I see that your little brother has the smaller piece of oaSre. Did you give him hie choice as I told you to do ? Johnny—Yee'm. I told him he could have his ohoioe, the little piece or none,. and he took the little pieoe. THE tramp questio• we have always with. ns, but at this season of the year it forma itself upon the public mind with greater persistence than at any other time of the year. In this oity various plane have been; tried in dealing with these men, but none seem a satisfactory solution of the problem. The homes provided for them of couree give them shelter for the time being, but, the police complain that the more kindly they are treated the more of them flock into the citywith the result that orimer increases and the public enffer in cense-' (pence. Canada might learn some lessono. from an experiment which was began in 'Germany by a benevolent clergyman in. 1882 to give relief to vagrants in exchange for work. The stations are styled Labor Colonies, and last year 21 of them admitted 6,231 persons. If a tramp refuses the work, provided for him at a colony be is turned over to the civil authorities and disposed of according to law. The system hie already reduced vagrancy and mendioanoy in the Empire, and has diminished indisorimi-' nate almsgiving. The work enpplied at the colonies is farm labor, reclamation of wastes forestry y or trades. They are sag - ported solely by private subsoriptions. After 14 days the tramp is paid moderate wages, and from them is deduoted the goat of clothing and other articles he may nee. Besides the colonies there are a thousendt: "statiops" where wanderers have tempo- rary relief, always in return for work. The promotera of this partial charity hope that a penniless wanderer seeking work shall be enabled to travel from one end of the land to another without bagging, and they° are not without hope that he will perhaps. attain to an appreciation of the advantage% of honest and regular labor. It is objected, that this system encourages aimless, wandering, and produces a obese of "Oolorfy rounders and bummers." Cera: fainly, it lute not yet suppressed the tramp; but it is steadily working in that direction..