HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2005-06-23, Page 5THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, JUNE 23, 2005. PAGE 5.
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Not to be paranoid but...we’re next
"Whvasion of the Body Snatchers, an old sci-
t fi cult movie from the ’50s. is a classic
JL study in paranoia. It tells the story of an
alien invasion of our planet by mysterious
human-sized seed pods. The pods show up in
basements, in greenhouses, in tool sheds -
even on a pool table.
They 'take over’ humans one by one, but
they don’t kill them. They just turn them into
walking, talking, emotionless zombies. In the
last scene of the movie, the hero, who has
watched his friends and loved ones turn into
■pod people', is running down a highway,
fleeing the menace. At the edge of exhaustion,
he turns to the camera and screams “YOU’RE
NEXT'”
Well. um. not to be paranoid or anything but,
ah...we’re next.
1 refer, albeit obliquely, to the eerily named
iPod, the sleek and sexy portable music player
that was first marketed by Apple last year and
is currently selling like hotcakes.
The iPod is to the old Sony Walkman as a
Porsche Carrera is to a John Deere tractor. A
Walkman usually holds just one disc at a time.
The iPod can hold thousands upon thousands
of songs and still sit on your hip, as
unobtrusive as a Fido phone. It even has a
‘shuffle’ feature which allows the user to
‘randomize’ his or her song selections. You
become your own deejay.
You create a sound track to accompany your
life. This makes the iPod not so much an
entertainment system as a body extension.
The iPod also allows the user to connect to
the internet, to on-line music stores and to
other users. For serious fans, once they’re in
Premier named sex symbol abroad
Ontario has its first premier named an
international sex symbol, but this
novel rating should not be accepted
entirely at face value.
Liberal Premier Dalton McGuinty has been
chosen as a 'hottie’ among world politicians
by a British newspaper that pointed out while
still under-50 he leads Canada’s most
populous province.
The term ‘hottie’, for those unfamiliar with
current jargon, means someone considered
sexy, a male earlier generations would have
called a hunk, heartlhrob, ladies’ man or
matinee idol when movies drew large
afternoon audiences.
This accolade is not as impressive as it
sounds, first because looks are a matter of
personal taste and beauty is in the eye of the
beholder, and the paper picked McGuinty
from photographs of politicians.
On a good day in a favourable light the
premier can appear reasonably presentable,
but other times looks angular and gawky and
in need of a good meal. Although he always
impresses as the youngish man known to have
power among mostly older-looking guys.
But when the Progressive Conservatives ran
TV ads charging McGuinty was “not up to the
job.” they had no trouble finding a photograph
in which he could be considered furtive,
untrustworthy and cornered, like a criminal in
a police mug shot.
McGuinty has been called sexy before,
briefly when he was in opposition and
newspapers reported Liberal insiders were
finding women saying this in their polls, but
insiders always find favourable impressions of
their leader. •
The Liberals already were considered more
popular with women than premier Mike
Harris’s Tories, but this was attributed to his
cutting social programs and being personally
harsh and confrontational.
The Liberals claimed women also felt
Arthur
Black
their iPod aural cocoon, there’s really very
little reason to come out.
Which helps explain those sleepwalking,
head-bobbing, off-in-a-trance people I keep
bumping into on the street.
Pod people.
Not surprisingly, dedicated iPodders are
exhibiting some distinctively abnormal
behavioural tics - especially when they are
untimely yanked away from their iPods. Sara
Scalenghe is a Washington graduate student
who was the victim of a burglary recently. The
thief broke into her apartment and stole some
cash, her digital camera, an heirloom gold
necklace...
And worst of all, her iPod.
It contained her 50 favourite songs, a
university course dissertation and several
recorded conversations with friends.
“I know it sounds silly,” says Sara, “but it
changed everything. I was really upset. I can't
explain it, but it hurt.”
Scalenghe was so distraught that she even
gave up going to the gym for her regular
exercise. She couldn’t bear to work out
without her favourite tunes endlessly
unspooling in her ear.
It was even worse for Washington
’s Park
Eric
Dowd
McGuinty was sexy and “fetching.” but this
did not stampede them to vote for him in the,
1999 election, because Harris retained his
majority.
McGuinty also was said to look like
Hollywood actor Anthony Perkins and there
was some truth to this, but Perkins’s strong
suit was not looking sexy. He was lean, even
emaciated and brooding, so some women may
have liked to mother him. He was also best
known for his role as Norman Bates,
deranged hotel-keeper who murdered
heroine in a shower in the movie Psycho.
The Bates character was so notorious New
Democrat leader Howard Hampton tried to
link McGuinty to it in an election and
complained Liberal propagandists seeking to
boost McGuinty were “trying to turn Norman
Bates into John Wayne,” but the Liberals
objected and forced an apology.
The murder in the shower scene also
recently was voted the most terrifying ever.
This was definitely not the face a girl would
yearn to take home to mother.
The only earlier Ontario premier called sexy
was Liberal David Peterson, who was tall and
had regular features, although was
prematurely gray.
A magazine gushed he was “beautiful in the
style of a Gainsborough portrait, with Cupid’s-
bow mouth and large, expressive eyes.” A
newspaper called him a lean, mean sexy
machine and the admired New York governor
Mario Cuomo said if he was as good-looking.
accountant John Hoctor. A thief tossed his pad
and made off with his digital camera, a laptop
and an iPod containing more than 2,000 songs.
Hoctor had spent weeks hunched over his
laptop, transferring his extensive CD
collection onto his computer’s hard drive and
then onto his iPod. All gone.
“1 have to start all over again,” he says.
And he doesn’t look like he’s got the
strength to do it.
For those of us outside the iPod force field,
the answer seems academic, if not mundane.
Get over it. It’s organized noise for God's
sake. But for people under the spell, it's pretty
serious.
Anita Boss, a forensic psychologist, says it's
critical. “Everybody has a lot of memories
they associate with music," she says, "and
musical taste is usually very important to
people. You actually have a piece of identity
theft here. Anytime something is stolen that is
so personal, victims are going to have a
reaction like that. It’s not the same as stealing
a coat.”
Well, I guess. And I guess it’s not going to
get better any time soon. Sony has just applied
for a patent for a revolutionary method
(developed for the blind and deaf) of beaming
images and sounds directly into a person’s
brain.
I figure it will take advertisers
approximately four point nine nanoseconds to
glom on to this technology and apply it to the
merchandising of mattresses, penis extension
schemes and cough remedies.
Excuse me while I scream: “WE’RE
NEXT!”
he would run for president.
But Peterson won only one election, while
Tory premier William Davis, who was clean-
cut and sturdily built as a former university
football player but never called handsome or
dashing, won four.
Canadians also should not place a lot of
reliance in the judgment of British media. This
writer covered Canada for almost all major
British papers for more than two decades.
They knew little about Canada and were prone
to report prime minister Brian Mulroney’s
marriage was in imminent danger of breaking
up, whereas many years later it still is intact,
and that Prince Andrew at school near
Peterborough risked being torn apart by bears.
They have bears in Canada, don’t they?
The U.K. paper probably needed a picture of
a politician not in his dotage in a hurry and
came across one of a reasonably presentable
the ’ McGuinty. It would not have been as
the scientifically researched as it sounds.
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your letters brief and concise.
Bonnie
Gropp
The short of it
Give us names
The selections have been made for
another year and our communities have
honoured their Citizens of the Year.
Each spring, from nominations submutted by
residents, a committee from each of the towns
of Blyth and Brussels agonizes over whom
should be recognized. My role is simply as
liaison between the committee and The Citizen
which sponsors the award. As a result 1 hear
their discussions and their reasons. It is often an
extremely difficult decision.
Ironically, it is also often during discussions
that names are mentioned of people who were
not nominated. It is unfortunate that someone
from the community doesn’t think to put the
names forward when the nominations are being
accepted.
When the form is first included in our
newspaper at the beginning of the year, it is
typical for merely a handful of names to be
submitted. As the deadline nears, we often
publish a request that people consider
nominating someone and usually receive many
more, giving the committee a good deal to
mull over.
However, there could and should be more.
Living in one community and working in
another, affords me ample opportunity to learn
about the dedicated community volunteers and
leaders. And let me tell you their numbers are
many.
What makes a Citizen of the Year is often
individual choice, which is why the selection
committee is comprised of a diverse group. For
some of this group, it is the person who serves,
who never says no to any endeavour that would
benefit their community or its residents who is
worthy. They give of their time, expecting no
accolades or compensation.
For others, it is the driving force, the person
who is always in the public eye, being a strong
voice and a forward thinker, that should be
chosen.
To some, a Citizen of the Year is someone
who’s made a very special impact on the
community over the course of a specific time,
while others may feel that recognition should
go to the stalwart, the continued presence
within the community.
Stil! others may feel it’s a person of generous
heart and spirit who makes our communities
special, the one who is first there to soothe in
difficult times, who never forgets a special day,
someone who has never met a stranger.
With so many feelings regarding what might
make an individual stand out from the rest of
the deserving, making the selection is seldom
easy, whether it’s from a small or large field of
candidates. It would be nice, therefore, if the
committee members will anguish anyway, that
we make it worth their while. It would be nice
to see service clubs, which know the efforts of
their members, nominate one of their own.
Schools and churches could recognize a
volunteer. Individuals could bring to light the
names of those people who offer a strong
shoulder in difficult times, who simply by the
strength and kindness of their presence make a
town better.
Many of the successes in our small
communities, and the things that make them
special can be attributed to people such as the
two chosen this year from a field of
competitors. They are both extremely
deserving individuals.
Special people deserve recognition. Watch
for the nomination forms in the paper next year
and make sure everyone who should be
honoured, is at least given the chance.