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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2005-04-28, Page 5Other Views THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, APRIL 28, 2005. PAGE 5. Ouch! That’s gotta hurt! There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio Than are dreamt of in your philosophy. - Shakespeare ndeed. One of the big differences (aside from a heartbeat) between Hamlet’s close personal pal Horatio and your obedient correspondent is that I am acutely aware of how dumb I am. I fully accept that there are many terrestrial phenomena that will forever remain a mystery to me. I will never fathom the intricacies of quantum physics. I don’t expect to master conversational Urdu in my lifetime. Nor will I ever figure out the Byzantine kinks and curlicues of Michael Jackson’s brain. I will also never understand piercings. Body piercings, I mean. Wherein a person voluntarily pays to have his or her carcass bored, reamed, stitched, drilled or stapled. Yes, stapled. One of the latest piercing fads (that we can discuss in a family newspaper) involves having large metal staples punched into one’s body. I had a staple punched into my body once. In a rush to meet a history class deadline, I inadvertently (okay, clumsily) managed to staple the web between my left thumb and forefinger to a 10-page essay about Samuel de Champlain. It hurt like hell when I did it and smarted for days afterwards. I can’t imagine paying to have that done to me. There are a lot of things about body piercings that I can’t imagine. Piercings and moi parted company 35 years ago when the Hollywood epic A Man Called Horse hit the movie screens. You haven’t seen it? Lucky you. It’s all about an itinerant Englishman played by Ontario Liberals have new clout Ontario’s Liberals have finally discovered something it seemed they would never learn - they can stand up against their domineering federal party. This is almost like the littlest kid taking on the neighborhood bully. The Ontario Liberals have been overshadowed, and occasionally stomped on, by their usually successful federal party longer than most can remember. The federal Liberals have governed for 47 of the last 62 years and act so much as if this is their divine right they should choose their leaders by puffs of smoke. The provincial Liberals have governed for just seven of those years — they are very much the poor relatives. Federal Liberals once even picked Ontario party leaders, the last being Andrew Thompson, who had been an aide to prime minister Lester Pearson. Federal Liberals often are said to attract the best and brightest Liberals in Ontario and certainly have drawn the most ambitious, because they had more prospects of becoming ministers if they ran federally. The plundered provincially-oriented Liberals broke away into a separate organization three decades ago trying to prevent federal Liberals dominating. But the federal Liberals have continued plucking promising Liberals from the legislature, including Sheila Copps, on the ladder to deputy prime minister. Federal Liberals have never hesitated to let down their Ontario cousins. Prime minister Pierre Trudeau and finance minister John Turner let their continued rivalry from their race for leader burst into the open eight days Richard Harris, who hooks up with a band of Sioux Indians. There, he partakes of a tribal custom called the Sun Vow ritual wherein the devotee (Harris) is hoisted off the ground by means of ropes hooked through his pectoral muscles. Sound grisly? Looks worse. After I saw Richard Harris ratcheting skywards, howling and grimacing, I couldn’t entertain the concept of an earlobe piercing, much less anything more visceral. The thing that gets me about piercings is that they’re so useless. All that agony and disfigurement, the swelling and risk of infection - for what? A safety pin through your eyebrow or a D ring through your septum will not put you on the fast track to fame and riches. In fact, the more flamboyantly visual piercings will shrink your circle of friends and limit your choice of professions, all of which will include the phrase “Do you want fries with that”. But with most fads there comes a tipping point at which said fad either fades away or morphs into something bigger. I believe body piercing has arrived at its tipping point thanks to a young Texan named James Sooy. James likes to dream up new and different ways of attaching metal hardware permanently to his person. I haven’t met him but I like to think he has Eric Dowd From Queen’s Park before one Ontario vote. Turner resigned, complaining of differences on economic policies, and Liberals appeared a party in turmoil. This helped Ontario Liberals lose the election. The federal Liberals also have been a handicap to their Ontario party in elections almost routinely, as opponents argued they would allow the province to become a branch plant run by powerful federal Liberals. Ontario Liberals did not protest much publicly, not wanting to be seen as making excuses, although David Peterson, the only Liberal premier in six decades until Dalton McGuinty in 2003, called the federal Liberals a “millstone.” McGuinty found the Ontario Liberals can have an impact on their successful federal cousins inadvertently - he certainly was not looking for it. McGuinty got in trouble last year by breaking a promise not to increase taxes and failing to pin blame on the outgoing Progressive Conservative government, which left him a massive deficit. The Ontario Liberals’ broken promise became a symbol of Liberal abuses in a federal general election and forced Martin to deplore it. the standard eyebrow ring, nose plug and chin stud. He may even have those ‘ear inserts’ that make the bearer look like he’s lugging around a couple of drink coasters in his ear lobes. What I know James Sooy has for sure is a tiny stainless steel barbell that runs right through the bridge of his nose. That’s not so unusual. Lots of ‘mod’ enthusiasts have nose bridge barbells. What’s different about Sooy’s barbell is...it’s threaded. Each end of the barbell has been carefully milled to receive specially modified screw- on...eyeglass lenses. That’s right. When you and I put on eyeglasses we hook them over our ears. When James Sooy puts on glasses he screws them right into his head. Is this dog gonna hunt? I don’t think so. Sooy admits his invention can be a pain in the, well, nose. He says that to put them on or take them off is a 10-minute operation with a tiny screwdriver. I have to think that the market for a finicky gizmo like that is going to be deservedly minute. On the other hand, chances are Pierced Glasses will take off like a rocket. Even lead to other piercing innovations. How about a Timex spot-welded to your wrist? Your cellphone surgically implanted on the side of your head? Don’t ask me if Pierced Glasses will sink or swim. I’m the guy who once wrote that Leonard Cohen’s singing sounds like a set of bagpipes being run over by a Zamboni. That same week he was named Canadian male vocalist of the year. I also bought Nortel stock and bet on the Canucks to win the Stanley Cup. Twice. It’s amazing I don’t drive an Edsel. The federal Liberals won only 75 seats in Ontario compared to 100 the previous election, so McGuinty helped them lose their majority. McGuinty recognized the impact he could have and recently claimed the federal government collects $23 billion a year more in taxes from Ontarians than it returns in services and demanded it start reducing this. The language on both sides has become heated and not at all what one would expect in a family. McGuinty has said he will not hesitate to press his claim in a federal election that could result if the Liberals are defeated over their diversion of public money to party funds in Quebec. The premier said this could make federal Liberals uncomfortable and hurt their chances, but his responsibility is to his province. McGuinty has whipped up support from odd allies including the Ontario opposition parties, business, Quebec premier Jean Charest and federal Conservative leader Stephen Harper. The mere sight of an Ontario Liberal premier hobnobbing with their main enemy before an election must infuriate federal Liberals. The federal Liberals have replied Ontario is well off compared to other provinces and it is a condition of Confederation that rich provinces help poorer. Some federal Liberals also have said they are worried McGuinty’s criticisms could hurt them in an election and don’t want to fight the Ontario Liberal premier as well as the federal opposition parties. This is an issue with a lol more twists and turns - but the Ontario Liberals at last are getting'some of their own back. Jim Brown Just thoughts Changing attitudes Mental Health Week is next month, and people will not really kn^w it has come. While attitudes have changed towards mental illness, there is still a stigma attached to the disease - for the one afflicted with it, and for their whole family. However, mental illness is no longer something to be ashamed of. In fact, more people suffer from some form of mental illness than people realize. While schizophrenia is one of the most known about forms of mental illness, there are other forms such as depression, manic depressive (bipolar), obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety disorder and alcoholism. Most people suffer from depression, anywhere from mild to chronic, but do not realize or fully understand what they are suffering from. There are different degrees of depression. Depression can be overcome in most people, with the help of anti-depressants and therapy. Even a person who suffers from a lifetime of depression can get better, but it takes time. Even those who suffer from chronic or severe depression and may have suicidal thoughts or tendencies can get better. But, again, it takes a lot of hard work by the psychiatrist, the therapist and the patient. And, it takes time. In his book. Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy, Dr. David D. Burns said depression has been called the world’s number one health problem. In fact, depression is so widespread it is considered the common cold of psychiatric disturbances. But there is a grim difference between depression and a cold. Depression can kill you. Studies indicate the suicide rate has been on a shocking increase in recent years, even among children and adolescents. The escalating death rate has occurred in spite of the anti-depre ,sant drugs and tranquilizers that have been dispensed during the past several decades. Depression is an illness and not a necessary part of healthy living. What’s more important - - you can overcome it by learning some simple methods of mood evaluation. But it must be understood, there is no overnight or instant cure for depression. It takes a lot of hard hard work by everyone involved, but it also takes a lot of patience and understanding by family, friends and associates of the patient. There are different theories regarding depression - what it is, how it’s caused, how severe it is and how it can be cured? According to Dr. Bums, a group of psychiatrists and psychologists at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine had reported a significant breakthrough in the treatment and prevention of mood disorders. Dissatisfied with traditional methods for treating depression because they found them to be slow and ineffective, these doctors developed and systematically tested an entirely new and remarkably successful approach to depression and other emotional disorders. A series of recent studies confirms that these techniques reduce the symptoms of depression much more rapidly than conventional psychotherapy or drug treatment. This name of this revolutionary treatment is cognitive therapy. Cognitive therapy is a fast-acting technology of mood modification that a person can learn to apply on their own. It can help to eliminate the symptoms and stimulate personal growth so the person can minimize future upsets and cope with depression more effectively in the future. However, before getting involved in any form of therapy it is best to consult your family doctor and/or a mental health professional.