The Citizen, 2006-01-26, Page 5THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, JANUARY 26, 2006. PAGE 5.
Other Views
Paranoid you say? Who's
get some weird Christmas presents from /
time to time, but this year I got the capper.
It's a tiny swatch of leather with arcane
symbols burned onto it, attached to a rawhide
string that I'm supposed to wear around my
neck.
The woman who gave this to me swears it
will protect me from 'electrical pollution' —
invisible fallout from cell phones, death rays
from . my computer, toxic emanations from
hydro wires, my microwave, my AM/FM
radio, my toaster, my electric blanket and, I
suppose, a battery-operated dildo, should
someone give me one of those next Christmas.
I love the lady `gifter' dearly, but she is batty
as a loon. She is convinced there is a vast,
Darth Vaderish conspiracy out there, the sole
purpose of which is to poison us all.
Nothing I say can sway her. No argument I
mount can dent her force field of conviction.
That's the perverse beauty of her paranoia —
it's impermeable. She can twist and torque any
data until it supports her belief system.
No scientific proof? That's because all the
scientists have been bought off. No media
expose? Whaddya expect, dummy? Big Media
is just a mouthpiece for the Bad Guys.
And if I argue too long, she gets very quiet.
She's not listening to what I say. She's
thinking I might be One of Them.
It's a bizarre mindset. Scientists, police
detectives — even reporters .— assemble facts
.and try to marshal them to' a logical
conclusion. Paranoiacs begin with their
conclusion and then cherry-pick and hand
sculpt `factoids' to support it. It's the complete
inversion of deductive reasoning, rationalism
and — you know — sanity.
You'd like to believe that kind of ju ju
superstition disappeared along with the
Spanish Inquisition, bear-baiting and the
sacrifice of pigeons to the Sun God, but you'd
be wrong. It is alive and well in the 21st
century.
Exhibit A: The Aluminum Foil Deflector
Beanie.
There are grown human beings walking
around, bearing children, driving cars and
casting votes who actually believe wearing
aluminum foil skull caps will deflect hostile
radio signals. They contend that malevolent
alien forces are beaming these signals at our
brains in an attempt to achieve mind control
over the human race.
Recently, skeptical researchers at the
Massachusetts Institute of Technology
experimented with tin foil beanies (I'm
guessing significant volumes of beer were
involved) and concluded that wearing such
gizmos would, if anything, amplify any
incoming radio signals, making the
wearers twice as receptive to mind control
messages.
At last report there had been no response
from the beanie-o-philes, but no doubt they're
coming up with a press release declaring the
MIT report a blatant public relations .cover-up
attempt by Venusian Lizard Kings Who Would
Make Slaves of Us All.
Or perhaps the paranoiacs of the world are
losing heart. Colin Andrews certainly is.
and provincial governments to change the
Constitution and insert a Charter protecting
rights.
The NCC accused Davis of surrendering to
Trudeau, helping him make a power grab and
resembling Neville Chamberlain. He was the
British prime minister who bowed and scraped
to Hitler in a vain attempt to avert the Second
World War. We are not making this up, as
negative ads said in the election — and it was
among the most disgraceful comparisons ever
in Ontario politics.
This was before Harper ran the NCC, but he
must have known of, and felt comfortable,
with its policies and tactics or he would not
have agreed to lead it.
The NCC attacked a later Conservative
leader, Larry Grossman, for supporting pay
equity, rent controls and minor protection
from discrimination for homosexuals, all now
commonly accepted.
The NCC said Grossman was "more
socialist than the socialists" and urged
Conservatives to withhold donations, but
Grossman retorted that being criticized by the
NCC raised his stature with voters.
When the New Democrats were in
government, an NCC offshoot, Ontarians for
Responsible Government, claimed it had a poll
showing "a shocking" 41 per cent of residents
felt it was managing the economy so poorly
paranoid?
Andrews is Mister Crop Circle. Over the
past 20 years he's amassed more than 35,000
photographs, 650 videotapes and hundreds of
pamphlets, brochures and broadsheets, all
purporting to prove that Alien Envoys are
visiting earth regularly to stomp around in our
wheat fields on moonless nights leaving
indecipherable messages that are c011ectively
referred to as 'crop circles'.
"Universal energy interactions may be at
work and the interface between two
dimensions register spectacular patterns of
great meaning and such depth as man can yet
imagine," muses Andrews.
Be that as it may, Andrews is now prepared
to let his collection go — for a fee. It's for sale
on eBay. Starting price: $250,000.
So far, no bidders.
Hey, who wants to be lumbered with a
cumbersome collection like that when the
planet's only going to be around for another
half dozen years? That's the contention of
people who follow the Mayan calendar.
The Ancient Mayans decreed that the world
began on Aug. 13, 3114 BC and will come to
an end on Dec. 21, 2012.
Of course, the Ancient Mayans also believed
it was a swell idea to carve the hearts out of
living prisoners and to hurl screaming virgins
into wells, so maybe we should take their
prognostications with a grain of salt — but
that's just me being negative.
I might also point out that the Mayans, for
all their astronomical perspicacity, did not
survive to see much of the 1 1 th century, much
less the 21st. Mayan culture pretty much
imploded around 1,000 AD.
Well what did you expect? They never had a
chance.
No tin foil.
they would seriously consider leaving the
province if they could afford to.
Not many would believe this and it proved
only questions in a poll 'can be worded to
obtain almost any desired answer.
The NCC accused Brian Mulroney when he
was Conservative prime minister of being 'too
pink' and "subsidizing socialism."
It ran ads saying an NDP leader, Ed
Broadbent, whom most people probably
would consider as comfortable as old shoes,
was "very, very scary."
The NCC also ran huge, cruel ads criticizing
a federal Conservative government decision to
allow in 50,000 Vietnamese refugees, arguing
they would bring in too many relatives, take
jobs from Canadians, find housing scarce and
feel out of place. The government replied this
smacked of racism.
Under Harper the NCC lobbied for tax
credits for parents who send their children to
private schools, which helps mostly, although
not only, the better-off, weakens public
education and in Ontario has been introduced
by Harris and rejected by the current Liberal
government.
The NCC also would sell all crown
corporations whose functions car, be
performed by the private sector and not even
Harris or Thatcher went that far.
How much of this does Harper still believe?
Final Thought
It's when you are safe at home that you
wish you were having an adventure. When
you're ,having an adventure you wish you
were safe at home.
— Thornton Wilder
Promise of youth
It's always nice to hear those' good news
stories. And from my perspective even
nicer to report them.
Recently, however, I got to go one better and
actually deliver the good news story in person
to someone who was herself the key figure in
a good news story.
Abby McGavin of Walton is 10. Three years
ago, during a family trip to Toronto to see a
play, she was moved by the sight of homeless
people out in the cold with no warm covering.
While this would be true of many of us, I know
I too have felt sympathy for these poor
unfortunates; at a mere seven years of age, she
decided to try and do something.
Returning home she instigated a drive for
warm clothing, etc. and with her mother's help
found a way to distribute them. Since then
each winter the family has loaded up and
transported the coats to a Toronto church.
From there they are handed out to the
homeless through an outreach program.
Abby's story warmed my heart when I first
heard about it. She had no illusions that she
could change the world, but was content to
help whatever little corner of the world she
could. But there is also the fact that a child,
and again I remind she was seven when this all
began, felt such compassion for her fellow
man. Righting society's wrongs is not
something we expect of our children.
The fact that Abby took it upon herself at
such a tender age to try, and has kept it up for
three years, has garnered her a nomination for
an Ontario Junior Citizen of the Year award.
Twelve will be chosen from 130 nominees for
this prestigious honour.
Needless to say, Abby is in good company.
I have attended the awards luncheon at the
Ontario Community Newspapers Association
spiting conference when the presentations are
made. To say it's a humbling experience is an
understatement. The young people chosen
exemplify courage, maturity and selflessness
to a level we should all aspire to reach. There
are community leaders, youths who have been
inspired and inspire. There are the samaritans,
those who see a wrong and rise to the
challenge to make it right. And there are those
who face adversity of their own but never
waiver in their positive outlook, nor fail to
impress with their bravery.
While the awards are an opportunity to
bring recognition to deserving youth they are
also a pleasant reminder to the older and more
jaded among us that there are some pretty
terrific kids out there. It's a reality we often
forget. For whatever reason, we tend to hear
more about the few troublemakers who exist.
Their exploits gain notoriety, because after all,
mischief and mayhem is not what's expected
that in society.
Thus, while we'may privately acknowledge
the attributes of the truly great young people
in our midst, they don't generally get public
attention. They are the majority, so may be
overlooked or taken for granted.
It was my pleasure to deliver the nomination
certificate to Abby this past week. It was the
first time I have met her and as I'm sure is the
case with all who become acquainted with her
was immediately charmed. She is a wonderful
young girl, with a warm smile. She is poised
and articulate, but also exuding the sweetness
that only a child can.
Abby McGavin is a shining example not just
of the beauty of youth, but of their promise. I
congratulate her on her nomination.
To understand Stephen Harper you
should know for three years he ran a
group started in and often focused on
Ontario that was slightly to the right of Mike
Harris and Margaret Thatcher, although this
never emerged much in the federal election.
The federal Conservative leader in a break
from elected politics, was, from 1998-2001,
president of the National Citizens' Coalition,
founded by Colin Brown, a wealthy insurance
executive and Progressive Conservative
activist, in London, Ontario.
Brown in the 1960s was a friend of
Conservative premier John Robarts, also from
London, and his company managed a lot of
provincial civil servants' pension funds.
Brown's only other claim to fame was he
took Robarts and a planeload of about 60
politicians and business leaders annually to the
United States to watch the Masters golf
tournament.
News media of the time reported this as a
sporting event, but the businessmen must have
been grateful to have this opportunity to
hobnob with politicians who made many
decisions that affected them.
Brown founded the NCC in 1968 mainly to
criticize the size and cost of government and
claimed it represents "ordinary people,"
although it has not pressed much for more
' safety in the workplace or a higher minimum
wage. .
He did not have the same rapport with
Robarts's successor- as premier, William
Davis, who was a more moderate Tory, did not
go on the golf trips and presumably
recognized accepting them would place him in
a conflict of interest.
Brown and the NCC even attacked Davis
after he helped Liberal prime minister Pierre
Trudeau secure a formula enabling the federal
Harper past being ignored