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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2006-01-05, Page 5Final Thought The world is moving so fast these days that the man who says it can't be done is generally interrupted by someone doing it. — Elbert Hubbard Other Views THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, JANUARY 5, 2006. PAGE 5, Two Pennys for your thoughts Reading is an escape, an education, a delving into the brain of another human being on such an intimate level that every nuance of thought, every snapping of synapse; every slippery desire of the author is laid open before you like, well, a book — Cynthia Heimel I honestly believe there is nothing like going to bed with a good book, or a friend who's read one. — Phyllis Diller Ah yes, books in bed. Not to come on like a frostbitten version of Casanova or anything, but I joyfully confess to having passed a good few hours over the past couple of weeks in bed with a couple of Canadian literary lionesses. And a lusty romp it's been. What's more, both of these scribbling Canucks answer to the name L. Penny — how unlikely is that? Full disclosure: I've never actually, you know, met Laura Penny. It's her latest book I've dallied with between the sheets. A book called Your Call Is Important to Us: The Truth -About Bullshit. As for Anglo-Quebecer Louise Penny, I haven't seen or talked to her in more than 20 years. Not since we toiled together at radio station CBQ in Thunder Bay. Her book has a much shorter title — Still Life. It's a murder mystery 'set in the Eastern Townships of Quebec. This is a federal election — so why are an Ontario premier, his main challenger and a former premier up to their necks in it? Liberal Premier Dalton McGuinty got involved first by choice, saying he supports Liberal Prime Minister Paul Martin, which surprised some, because their family relationship had been stormy. Martin in the last federal election did not want to be viewed as in the same party as McGuinty, because. the premier had become unpopular for breaking promises to avoid increasing taxes and balance the budget. McGuinty more recently. argued his federal cousins were cheating- the province, because they collected from it $23 billion more a year in taxes than they returned in transfer payments and services. Martin responded that Ontario was economically strong, then softened and agreed to cough up $5.7 billion more, but not all is yet in the province's hands. McGuinty since has complained Martin's government left Natives in a northern Ontario community in living conditions so deplorable the province had to evacuate them. The premier has now said in a .year-end interview he wants a national commission of the ' federal, provincial and territorial governments to re-examine the whole financial relationship between them. McGuinty was asked if he stands a better chance of help from Martin or federal Conservative leader Stephen Harper and replied he believes Martin "will deliver for us." McGuinty is taking risks, because he has piled another burden on Martin, who has made so many costly promises he may run short of funds. If Martin wins and fails to deliver, McGuinty could be seen as breaking another promise.. If Harper wins, he may not look hard for funds for McGuinty, because the premier helped an opponent This is on top of Harper saying in the campaign he lacks respect for McGuinty, which would provide a shaky start for a relationship between a prime minister Both books are grand reads. Your Call Is Important To Us is what I like to call a smackhead book. You read it and smack your forehead, saying Damn! How is it possible that nobody wrote about this before? Simply put, the book is a furious (and hilarious) torpedo amidships for the leviathan bullshit industry. How is it, Penny wants to know, that we have so passively accepted the increasing tonnage of meaningless verbal and visual manure in our lives, from the robotic telephone-y voice recording (that used to be a living, breathing human), to blathering politicians, Hollywood hucksters and outrageously deceitful advertising campaigns. Why have we let this insulting crap seep into our homes and our minds without fighting back? Think of the current federal election campaign. When's the last time you truly believed anything coming out of any politician's mouth? Why do we just sit back like drugged lemmings and accept it without a murmur of protest? and leader of the biggest province. l-larper told reporters McGuinty is out of step with most premiers, because they "hate" Martin. Harper ' added McGuinty is untrustworthy and "I wouldn't want him behind my back," apparently referring to the premier's vacillating between criticizing and praising Martin. McGuinty responded he gathers Harper's real concern is that he endorsed Martin, but this support is justified, because Martin helped Ontario and there are good grounds for believing he will help more. Provincial Progressive COnservative leader John Tory, who once co-chaired a disastrous federal election campaign for prime minister Kim Campbell, is both canvassing for Harper and feeling confident enough to offer him advice. Tory said Harper is handicapped in Ontario because its voters "don't know him and what he is about." He said Harper has to spend more time in the province and focus on issues that matter most to its residents, particularly jobs, taxes and healthcare, and not be distracted by other issues such as same-sex marriage. Tory said he hopes to spend a good deal of time campaigning with federal Conservative Laura Penny doesn't murmur. She lets 'em have it with both barrels and a hockey stick- across the back of the head for good measure. Advertising, public relations, the insurance biz, politics, entertainment, Big Pharma — "An all-you-can-eat buffet of phoniness" is what she calls the monsoon of mendacity that threatens to engulf us. Angry? You bet — but funny, too. You'll howl with laughter as much as with rage when you read this book. And then there's the other Penny — Louise. Her book Still Life is much more genteel, even though there's a full-blown murder front and centre. I won't give away the plot here, only tell you that unlike most dysfunctional fiction these days, the story is not gory or sleazy or twisted in the least. It's an elegant, riveting whodunnit crafted with grace, wit and a dazzling evocation of daily life in the Eastern Townships that'll make you want to book. a vacation there — preferably next fall in time for the annual strip tease of the sugar maples. Bonus: Still Life begins with the most heart- rendingly honest preface that I've read in many a moon. So. Looking for a little bedtime action? Here you go: two books, both written by L. Pennys. All Canadian. Highly entertaining. One hundred per cent barnyard-droppings- free. You're welcome. candidates. • Former Conservative premier Mike Harris, who retired from elected politics nearly four years ago, has been dragged into the campaign by federal Liberals, who feel they can extract votes from him. Harris is frowned on by most residents because of growing recognition he weakened essential services to pay for tax cuts, although he retains a core of true believers. Ontarians also have been reminded of Harris's confrontational stances by recent testimony at a public enquiry he was abusive and obscene when ordering natives ejected from a provincial park. The federal Liberals have urged their candidates to claim Harris "cost Ontario dearly" and Harper would "damage Ontario like Harris did." McGuinty's Liberals already seize every opportunity to remind of Harris, hoping this will help sway voters to reject the Conservatives in the next provincial election, and it almost seems Harris is still in the legislature. Harris's image is seen as -such a handicap two levels of Liberals are now trying to wring votes from it. Few premiers have left such an impression. Looking ahead My, didn't that go quickly? Another 12 months behind us. And now, whether it was a year to remember or better to forget, it's time to look ahead with promise to a new year. Regardless of how quickly the months flew by, in retrospect those 365 days were probably filled with a lot of changes and surprises, some welcome, some less so. There would be achievements and failures, gains and losses. It's good to celebrate the successes, to hold on to the positives. But there's little point in regret, in dwelling on what went wrong. That's not always easy. The world view, as always continues to challenge us. Peace remains elusive. Society has become cynical about nearly everything. Disasters ran the gamut with Asia's 2004-ending Boxing Day tsunami setting the stage for some of God's worst acts. There was a devastating earthquake in Pakistan's Allai Valley that claimed the lives of more than we'll probably ever know. And hurricanes and tropical storms waged war on the Caribbean and southern U.S. There were bombings in London and a voice of reason and peace was lost with the passing of Pope John Paul II. Convicted wife killer Scott Peterson went to jail; on trial for pedophilia, Michael 'Jackson avoided jail once again. Nationally, our cynicism grew as we awaited the Gomery Report and will now be tested at the polls with an election. Evil personified in the guise of Karla Homolka is not only out from behind bars, but won her appeal to have restrictions removed. Ontarians have watched in horror as gun crimes in 'Toronto continue to rise. Of the 78 murders in the city last year, 52 were gun- related, more than double the number in 2004. One thing that never comes as any surprise however, is the reality that the world in which we live is bizarre, an enigmatic wonder that is capricious, entertaining, occasionally harsh, but full of beauty. While it often seems we focus more on the warts of existence we should try to remember that there is always perfection amidst the ugliness. The new year brings us the opportunity of hope for change, for new beginnings and for a fresh outlook. The optimists will use the wrongs to make a right. They will look for the calm in chaos and cling to it. They will be made stronger by past adversity and capitalize on that new power to find the positives. This- is the reason we make resolutions, to perfect and improve upon the current us. The promise of a new year beckons us to fix what's amiss. Unfortunately the pressure tends to be too much. The vagaries of life and our own frailties tend to weaken resolve. A recent story suggests that niost people break their resolution within 21 days. Those that go beyond are probably the same ones undaunted by the vagaries of life. They see the value behind improvement and set to face the challenge of following through. I admit that I walk among the quitters. I make a resolution with little conviction in part because I fail to keep them, This year, therefore, I didn't even bother pretending. Instead, I thought of what 2005 meant to me. There's not denying it's a troubling world at times. So, there should be no denying the bottom line either. Amidst the garbage there's a lot of really great stuff happens too. For 2006 let's try to fodus on that. Province goes federal in election Letters Policy The Citizen welcomes letters to the editor. Letters must be signed and should include a daytime telephone number for the purpose of verification only. 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