The Citizen, 2004-05-20, Page 5THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, MAY 20, 2004. PAGE 5.
Other Views
Seemed like a great idea at the time
Idon't ask much from life. I don't expect the
stretch limos, flotillas of groupies. or a
wallet full of thousand-dollar hills to light
my Cohiha panatelas.
I have no interest in becoming Lord Black of
the Millpond. a guest on The Tonight Show or
of winning that Lottery for Life — a red velvet
hunk in the Canadian Senate.
No. I only have one unrequited desire: to
have, in my lifetime, One Great Idea.
Is that so much to ask? Archimedes got his
revelation in a bathtub. Newton got his under
an apple tree. Einstein brainstormed "E equals
MC squared" at his blackboard, and we can
guess where Thomas Crapper was sitting when
he got his inspiration to invent the flush toilet.
One great idea. That's all I ask for: I'm not
trying to he a Thomas Edison. filing a
thousand patents for everything from
phonographs to light bulbs. I just want one.
I thought I had it back in Grade 7. I
remember almost nodding off at my desk
while the teacher droned on about The
Rebellion of 1837,
"Upper Canada was a tiny colony," he was
saying. "not like the country of 15 million
(hey. it was a long time ago) that we live in
today."
And I fell to doodling at my desk. Fifteen
million...let's see...that would be
15....followed by six zeros. Imagine if I could
persuade every Canadian to mail me... one
penny.
That would put 15 million pennies in my
piggy bank. Or put another way, I'd have
$150.000! Which was a fortune. hack when I
was a kid. _
And that was- as close as -I ever got ni a Great
Idea. The Achilles heel that fatally hobbled my
breakthrough concept was the fact that I
Ontario's ruling Liberals are insisting
their shock by-election defeat is no
guide to the future, but they should ask
Roy McMurtry.
Or Chris Hodgson. or Ken Bolton or even
Greg Sorbara.
McMurtry, now Ontario's chief justice, was
a rising trial lawyer, as well as a best friend
from university days and backroom adviser to
Progressive Conservative premier William
Davis when they decided it was time for him to
enter the legislature.
They chose a by-election in 1973 in the
downtown Toronto-St. George riding that had
voted Tory for four decades. But a motherly
municipal politician. Margaret Campbell, who
said Davis was arrogant, ran for the Liberals
and defeated the anointed one.
McMurtry prudently chose not to run against
her in the next general election and Davis
undemocratically pushed a Tory MPP who had
been Speaker. Len Reilly, out of an even safer
neighbouring seat and gave his friend
comfortable passage.
McMurtry went on to be an articulate
attorney general, darling of the talk shows.
liberal-minded judge - and despite his Tory
background. outspoken critic of later Tory
governments that cut court spending.
But the byelection the Tories lost was'a sign
voters were unhappy with their party and
harbinger of setbacks to come, because they
lost their majority in a general election in 1975
after scandals including dubious fund-raising
and again in 1977 and failed to regain it until
1981. --
The Tories under Mike Harris won a
byelection in .Victoria-Haliburton riding held
by the Liberals in 1994. which shoWed Harris.
then leader of a small third party. was on his
Arthur
Black
couldn't think of a compelling argument to
convince my fellow citizens to start mailing
their pennies to me. My bombshell brainwave
died a-borning.
I admit, it sounds kinda lame a half-century
later, but great ideas don't have to be
blockbusters. Somebody invented the safety
pin. Others came up with the ballpoint pen and
the paper clip.
Small items, but great ideas all the same.
And it's not like it's hard to get a patent even
for a lame idea. Paul Hanson of St. Paul.
Minnesota just obtained a U.S. patent for his
all-new method of treating heart-related chest
pain.
Hanson's solution: just drink limeade — but
from concentrate.
That's it — Hanson's Great Idea in a nutshell.
He says it worked for him and the U.S. Patent
Office was sufficiently impressed. Impressed
enough to grant Hanson patent # 6,457.474.
I think Michael Nelson's idea had a more
obvious aura of greatness about it. Nelson
recently opened a law office in suburban
Orlando. Florida. leased himself a company
car (Mercedes), printed up some toney-looking
letterhead stationery listing all his law partners
and-began soliciting business from the families
of convicted drug traffickers.
Did very well, too until a radio station
investigated and found out that Nelson's law
way up.
Harris had developed his Common Sense
Revolution policies promising tax cuts.
smaller government and making people work
for welfare benefits, hut there had not been
much sign they were catching on.
In the byelection Harris• also showed the
hard-nosed attitude that became his trademark
and charged, with much exaggeration, that the
Liberals, his main opponents because the New
Democrat government was ready to fall. were
promoting same-sex rights ahead of the
economy.
Tory candidate Chris Hodgson won
comfortably and a year later Harris cruised to
a huge success in a general election.
A by-election in Middlesex South riding
in 1969 hinted at a future few suspected. An
Anglican priest, Ken Bolton. won in an area
traditionally Tory and the domain of premier
John Robarts.
The Tories regained the riding in the next
general election. But the New Democrats had
shown they could get votes in that area and
within a couple of decades they swept it in
winning their first and only • term in
gOvernment.
In another byelection that changed politics
New Democrat Jim Renwick won Riverdale
riding in Toronto, which also traditionally had
partners didn't exist and Nelson was not a
lawyer. As a matter of fact Nelson was himself
a felon. serving time for bank-fraud. He could
only 'practise' during the day as he, had to
return to a half-way house each night.
As near as investigators could figure Nelson
made "several hundred thousand dollars"
before he was nabbed. Not surprisingly,
Nelson's half-way house privileges have been
revoked.
Still, Great Ideas don't have to be
crooked and they don't have to involve lawyers
(but I repeat myself). Take Dennis Hope
of Gardnerville. Nevada. For the past
23 years. Mister Hope has operated a real_
estate company, selling lots to interested
customers,
But not in Nevada. Not even in North
America. Not even on this planet. Mister Hope
sells land...on the moon. Business has been so
good that he's expanding. He'll now sell you
choice lots on Mars and Venus as well. Going
price: $20 an acre.
How good is business? Very. Hope reckons
he makes about $270,000 U.S. a year.
And it's legal. It's based on something
Mister Hope learned in school as a kid. Back
when I was doodling through my history
lesson, Dennis Hope was paying attention. He
heard his teacher say that, while the
international Space Treaty of 1967 prohibits
nations from owning celestial bodies, it
doesn't say anything about individual
ownership.
- Hope says. "I even wrote to the United
Nations explaining my plan and asking if they
had, a lariolblem-.with it. Nobody ever wrote
hack." to •-
But that was 23 years and $6.5 million ago.
Great Idea. Mister Hope.
been Tory. in 1964. Renwick had been a
corporate lawyer and gave the small band of
NDP MPPs expertise and dimension it had
lacked and helped it become the biggest
opposition party in the legislature. which gave
it some privileges.
Renwick's win also prevented former
evangelist preacher and broadcaster Charles
Templeton from becoming leader of the
Liberals, who had struggled without success.
Templeton was campaigning strongly for
leader and ran also in the byelection to prove
he could be a winner, but his loss there ended
his leadership chances. Liberals who had to
wait another two decades before winning
government still talk about what they might
have achieved under Templeton.
Another byelection that pointed to the future
was Liberal Sorbara's return from retirement
when his party was in opposition in 2001 by
winning in Vaughan-King-Aurora riding north
of Toronto.
The riding is in the 905-dormitory area that
had been a Tory stronghold under Harris and
been held by popular ministey Al Pallactini,
who died. Within two years the Liberals under
Dalton McGuinty swept into government.
Funnily enough, • McGuinty as'. opposition
leader claimed that by-election was very much
a referendum on the government of the day,
No-one would expect him as premier to admit
the same today and not all by-elections
governments lose have predicted the future,
but some have pointed the way.
Final Thought
Smile — make everyone suspicious.
— Unknown
Bonnie
Gropp
The short of u
On the block
Atiny child's hand clasped,lightly. Eyes
that see the brilliant blue sky
overhead, the lush ground below, and
a wall of legs. The crowd stretches seemingly
for miles across country fields. , • •
These are my memories of a wonderful
summer day, some 40 years ago during my
first visit to a farm auction. The reins on this
rambunctious child were tight; high energy, of
course. must be restrained when there is an
abundance of opportunities to lead one astray.
And yet, in retrospect it was probably
unnecessary. The sights and sounds had awed
this curious innocent.
Wandering from table to table and among
machinery, listening to the amiable chatter of
neighbours and friends accompanied by the
hypnotic drone of the auctioneer, there were
far too many new experiences for me to be
bored and restless. Actually my naivete
resulted in only one misstep. Impressed with
my brand new silver wristwatch, I kept raising
my arm to check the time, until Uncle George
gently grabbed hold and admonished me to
stay still. Perhaps I'd raised the bidding on a
butter churn.
I hadn't thought about that day in forever,
but all those memories came flooding back
recently when my hubby, in quest of an
automobile, invited me to tag along to an
auction near Maryhill. This was. unbelievably
the first since that introduction many. many
years ago. Now wiser, I was no longer in need
of guardianship. but upon arriving I did stick
pretty close to the adult with me for awhile.
Once attuned to my environment, however, I
began to relax and take it all in.
There was almost a carnival atmosp:iere at
this event. A yard packed with people,
visiting, discus.:ing, looking. The smell of
grilled hotdogs permeating the air. Little
children trying to break through the crowd as
Mom or Dad hung on for dear life. i
The sense of anticipation from some was
almost tangible as they openly covetted
objects and eagerly awaited their debut on the
block. Still, for others, it was obvious the
outing was no more than a chance to socialize
as they wandered casually, expressing little
interest in much of anything.
Just like that first one for me, this auction
was held on a glorious day of sunshine and
azure sky. And, just like that first one, I still
had problems seeing over the heads of the
multitudes crowding around me. There were
the same conversations, just from different
voices. And the drone of the auctioneer was
still hypnotic.
Unlike that first time, however, I was able to
observe this event with a somewhat jaundiced
adult's eye. It was fascinating to see the initial
cautious bidding take on a life of its own and
escalate. It was also equally fascinating to
watch people who refused to offer the opening
bid, eventually slide past it without missing a
beat. After all what's a $50 jump. they seemed
to think, apparently forgetting they've already
taken several similar jumps.
But I also, amidst the quaint magic of this
cultural phenomenon, saw its failings, at least
for a serious shopper such as myself. When I
want something I want it and I don't want to
fight someone to get it, or pay more than it's
worth, or worse yet, go home without it.
Shopping isn't a competitive event for me.
I enjoyed the experience. but I guess you
could say while an auction might be a nice
place to visit. 1 wouldn't want to shop there.
Eric
Dowd
From
Queen's Park
By-elections can predict the future
fit, 1 11.) i,1,11, I ) 1.