The Citizen, 2000-12-06, Page 5THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 6, 2000. PAGE 5.
Other Views
And now, here’s the good news
First off — I’m guilty as charged, okay?
I admit it. That is not the problem. The
problem is how do I tell She Who
Knows Best?
Here’s the background. There is this stretch
of road not far from where I live that is straight
as a runway, smooth as a billiard table and
unobstructed on either side.
There is seldom any traffic on this road and
yet the authorities, for perverse reasons known
only to them, have decreed that the speed limit
on this stretch shall be 50 kilometers per hour.
It is ridiculous, uncalled for and I ignore it. I
always break the speed limit whenever I drive
this stretch.
And She Who Knows Best and who usually
sits in the co-pilot’s seat, always makes the
same comment.
“You’re going to get a ticket,” she says.
And I always scoff. I point out that there are
no sideroads for radar ambushes, no billboards
for cops to hide behind, the road is empty fore
and aft.
“Clear sailing,” I say.
“You’re going to get a ticket” she replies.
Yesterday I got a ticket. Doing 80 in a 50. It’s
not the $200 I mind (well, it is, but that’s a
whole other whinge) - it’s the fact that I have to
make room for a three course dinner ofcrow in
front of She Who Knows Best.
Breaking bad news - it’s an art form.
I was telling this tale to a pal of mine in the
coffee shop, looking for a little sympathy.
Instead he laughed, reached into his pocket and
handed me a letter.
“You wanna know how to deliver bad news?
Read this,” he said.
Nicotine might be good for you
There seems to be little good that one can
say about tobacco. It is considered to be
the cause of all kinds of illnesses, some
of them fatal and of late it has come in for an
increasing number of lawsuits.
There might seem to be some justification
for gradually removing it as an agricultural
crop, if it were not, it is suspected, such a
lucrative source of government revenue.
However, it is gradually becoming apparent
that one of tobacco’s most injurious properties,
nicotine, has some beneficial properties when
it comes to treating several physical ailments
and the medical profession is spending more
and more time looking into these properties.
First of all is the observation that smoking
can be used in the treatment of Parkinson’s
disease. Not only do smokers suffer less from
Parkinson’s than do non-smokers but those
who have it frequently have a milder form.
It is now being considered as a form of self-
medication and, while nobody is suggesting
that smoking is a healthy thing to do even for
people with Parkinson’s, the very discovery
mentioned above has led researchers to start
experiments with more controlled doses of
nicotine.
Nor is Parkinson’s the only illness to come
under this category. An even more common
ailment is schizophrenia. When its sufferers
use nicotine it responds in exactly the same
way.
Finally there is Alzheimer’s disease and,
while there is as yet not as much research done
with the use of nicotine in this area, it is
considered that the properties which are
producing the results in both Parkinson’s and
schizophrenia, can lead to some improvement
in the treatment of Alzheimer’s.
In experiments at the University of Vermont,
It was a letter from his daughter, who was
studying at a university in California. This is
what it said:
Dear Mom and Dad
It has now been three months since I left for
university. I have been remiss in writing this
and I am very sorry for my thoughtlessness in
not having written before. I will bring you up
to date now, but, before you read on, please sit
down.
DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER UNLESS
YOU ARE SITTING DOWN OKAY?
Well then, I am getting along pretty well
now. The skull fracture and the concussion I
got when I jumped out of the window of my
dormitory when it caught fire shortly after my
arrival are pretty well healed. I only get those
headaches once a day.
Fortunately the fire in the dormitory and my
jump were witnessed by an attendant at the gas
station near the dorm, and he was the one who
called the fire department and the ambulance.
He also visited me at the hospital and, since I
had nowhere to live, he was kind enough to
invite me to share his basement apartment. It’s
really a basement room, but it’s kind of cute,
once you get used to the rats.
He is a very fine boy and we have fallen
deeply in love and are planning to get married.
Raymond
Canon
The
International
Scene
psychiatrists found the use of nicotine with the
last two diseases led to the patients being better
able to stand up, walk and sit down than those
not taking the test. Furthermore the test group
demonstrated better learning and memory
skills.
This has led the drug companies to attempt
to find a compound which has the necessary
properties of nicotine but which can be
patented and thereby protected while it is being
developed and used. One such drug is already
under trial and has had promising results with
both Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s.
One interesting development has been the
discovery that nicotine also helps children who
are suffering from Tourette’s syndrome.
Children cannot be expected to smoke so the
nicotine has to be administered to them under
Final Thought
Be skillful in speech, that you may be
strong; [. . .] it is the strength of [. . .] the
tongue, and words are braver than all
fighting ... a wise man is a school for the
magnates, and those who are aware of his
knowledge do not attack him.
- The Teaching for Merikare
We haven’t set the exact date, but it will be
before my pregnancy begins to show.
Yes, Mom and Dad, I am pregnant. I
know how much you are looking forward to
being grandparents and I know you will
welcome the baby and give it the love,
devotion and tender care you gave me when I
was a child.
The reason for the delay in our marriage is
my boyfriend has some minor infection which
prevents us from passing our pre-marital blood
tests, and I carelessly caught it from him. This
will soon clear up with the penicillin injections
I am taking daily.
I know you will welcome him into our
family with open arms. He is kind and,
although not well-educated, he is ambitious.
Although he does not speak English fluently,
he is working evenings and weekends
promoting the family business.
He comes from a large family in Colombia
where his father is a big name in
pharmaceuticals.
Now that I have brought you up to date, 1
want to tell you that there was no dormitory
fire, I did not have a concussion or a
skull fracture. I was not in the hospital, I
am not pregnant or engaged. I do not have
syphilis and there is no man (or drug-dealer) in
my life.
However I am getting a ‘D’ in History and an
‘F’ in Science and I wanted you to see those
marks in the proper perspective.
Your Loving Daughter, Amanda.
I forgot to ask my pal what his daughter’s
major was.
Creative writing, I hope.
clinical conditions. Even though it produces
some form of nausea in 70 per cent of the
children being treated, its results are so
promising that many parents are requesting its
use.
This is simply because Tourette’s, in its
untreated form, is extremely distressing to both
the children and their parents.
Fortunately another medical compojnd
mirroring nicotine is being produced that
avoids most of the conditions of the nausea
mentioned above.
While nicotine cannot by any stretch of the
imagination be considered as a wonder drug, it
is certainly gratifying that a substance that has
come in for so much condemnation over the
past decade can actually be put to use for the
benefit of society. Already researchers are
looking into the possibility of its having even
other medicinal benefits.
" " ” ' ' Tf' " ....
Letters Policy
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printed as space allows. Please keep
your letters brief and concise.
Bonnie
Gropp
The short of it
Please take it outside
Believe me I do have empathy for
smokers. For well over a decade I was
not just one of you, but one of your
more prolific members. Pushed, and I do mean
pushed, by a neighbour’s teenage foster child
so that I wouldn't be compelled tb snitch on
her, I had my first puff of nicotine when I was
a mere 12 years old.
And unfortunately, never looked back. By
the time I was 17 I was smoking typically two
packs a day of Export A. An asthmatic, I could
often be found pathetically attempting to light
up between wheezes.
Paints a sad, sad picture doesn’t it? I began
to see this at the age of 19 and for the next
several years tried vainly to quit. However,
while I may have failed miserably each time
my resolve to give it up remained strong until
finally one day, after being humiliated with
dogged persistence by some non-partaking
friends, I threw away my smokes.
That was 23 years ago. Today I am the worst
of the anti-smoking sect, a sanctimonious ex
smoker. However, while our frustration and
ostracism of those still lost to the power of
nicotine may raise ire rather than inspire, I ask
this time only for you to try to see why your
habit, quite frankly, I have little patience for.
First, I have four children, who to the best of
my knowledge have never smoked. They have
respected their bodies and kept their lungs
healthy.
Last week, my youngest, also asthmatic,
attended a party. He hasn’t stopped coughing
since. A teenager is not going to stay home
just because people might be smoking. But the
damage that was done to him that night is not
only a reality, but as studies have shown,
worse than what the smokers did to
themselves.
My spouse and I too abended a function this
past we 'k, where upon entering the building
the air was redolent with second-hand smoke.
Within virtually minutes mv e>es were
burning, my breathing diminished.
Unfortunately, we were in for the long haul so
1 did the best I could to adapt to, what was for
me, extremely unpleasant surroundings.
The trip home was one of several miles.
During that time I was disgusted by the smell
permeating from my clothes, my hair and even
my skin. I was appalled when covering my
face to sneeze, I discovered that my hands
positively reeked of stale smoke. Arriving
home in the wee hours of the morning, I had to
shower before I could even consider going to
bed.
There are many smokers well aware of how
non-smokers feel and they generously
accommodate. But there are others who
defend not only their right to pollute their
lungs, but ours as well. They’re angry if told
they can’t smoke somewhere and feel smoking
bans are unfair. I recall attending a function
many years ago where again the air was thick
with smoke. It was winter, but needing air, I
went to stand at an open door for a time.
However, some huffing, puffing smokers at a
nearby table cursed me and asked me my
problem.
When I told them they were, a heated
discussion followed on an individual’s rights.
Apparently they believed that their right to
smoke took precedent over my right to
breathe. If I didn’t like it I should just stay
home, they said.
So sometimes I’m not as sympathetic as I
could be to smokers. But believe me, I do
know your side. I ask only that you try to see
mine and graciously take it outside.