HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2000-11-29, Page 5THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 29, 2000. PAGE 5.
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Options for curbing the beast
Don't knock capital punishment.
It's a potential parking space.
Anon
hat’s it. I am formally swearing off
driving my car into the city forever.
Henceforth I will hitchhike, ride my
bike, hail a cab or charter a chopper but I am
not going to drive downtown.
Actually, it’s not the driving that’s so
horrendous (although it’s bad enough) - it’s the
parking.
Park on the street? Forget it - not in prime
time, anyway.
On streets with no meters the cars are packed
so tight on both sides of the road you couldn’t
slip an Ace of Spades between the bumpers.
Then there are those ‘special’ side streets,
sporting signs like: ONE HOUR PARKING
ON ODD-NUMBERED DAYS EXCEPTING
WEEKENDS, HOLIDAYS AND DAYS
CONTAINING THE LETTER “D”
BETWEEN 0700 AND 0900 HOURS
RESTRICTED TO VEHICLES WITH
GREEN WINDSHIELD STICKERS UNLESS
OTHERWISE POSTED. OFFER VOID IN
COMMONWEALTH COUNTRIES AND
AMERICAN PROTECTORATES. POST NO
BILLS OR FLYERS.
And it’s only going to get worse.
I read a report in the paper that says the city
of Vancouver attracts so many new vehicles
each year that it would take a parking lane 60
miles long to park them.
A bit of confusion in the ranks
It all started with the widely reported riots
against the meeting of the World Trade
Organization in Seattle last year. We were
treated to nightly scenes on television which
showed rioters tangling with cops as the former
tried to break up the meetings of the
organization which had been held responsible
for a long list of sins of both commission and
omission.
The rioters succeeded to a considerable
degree and ever since then there have been
similar demonstrations at anything resembling
an international meeting of organizations
dealing with trade and finance.
When you are looking at such complex
issues as world poverty, unemployment and the
like one of the first victims is objectivity.
Demonstrators tend to get lumped together,
regardless of how many different groups make
up the protesting hordes.
Nor do the same groups show up at all the
demonstrations.
Yet the picture which is most frequently
presented to the public is one of scenes of
violence, as if the protesters were all anarchists
at heart and the police all ingrained sadists in
their desire to put down the protesters, no
matter how peaceful they may be.
What a pity!
When I was a San Francisco I ran across a
training session for protesters, and violence
was certainly not on the agenda, in fact, the
main theme was how to make a valid protest
without resorting to violence.
The sad part is that there are undoubtedly
generally some violence-prone demonstrators
around and they tend to be the ones on which
the media concentrates, knowing that they will
give the best 30 or 60 second clips for the
evening news.
The most violent demonstration to date was
the one at Seattle where trade was the agenda.
There were an estimated 50,000 demonstrators
on hand; the biggest single group of which
were the American labour unions. They have
generally never liked free trade since they
believe it leads to U.S. job losses. The case of
free trade was not really helped by the Clinton
administration since Al Gore needed the
support of these unions in his election
campaign.
However, at all the subsequent meetings at
I've got news for you, chum: I have driven,
albeit reluctantly, through the chrome and tin-
lined streets of Vancouver. Some days there’s
not enough space to park a roller skate.
And I know it’s no better in cities like
Toronto, Calgary and Montreal - worse, if
anything.
Parking is a nightmare. What are we going to
do about it?
Henny Youngman came up with one answer.
“I’ve solved my parking problem” the
comedian wisecracked “I bought a parked car.”
I heard of someone who came up with an
even more creative solution - a wealthy
looking woman who walked into a bank on
Toronto’s Bay Street one day and asked to see
the Loans Officer. “I’m going to London on
business for two weeks and I’d like to borrow
$5,000.”
“Certainly, madame,” oozes the loans officer,
“providing you have some kind of security for
the loan.”
The woman reaches into her purse and pulls
out a set of car keys. There is no mistaking the
insignia on the ignition key - it’s the familiar
Raymond
Canon
The
International
Scene
which demonstrators were present, the same
unions were conspicuous by their absence.
They had tried to make their point as far as the
U.S. was concerned and no further action was
deemed necessary.
Those who were in favour of such things as
human rights, the environment and poverty
seemed more uncertain at any demonstrations
including international finance as it pertains to
organizations such as the International
Monetary Fund and the World Bank. Finance is
a more nebulous concept than trade and it will
take a sharp demonstrator indeed to understand
any connection between capital flows and
poverty or human rights. I can’t think of one
protesting group who zeroed in on the wide
spread corruption which exists in many of the
poverty-filled countries; nevertheless, no
Letter to the Editor
THE EDITOR,
This year the Lung Association celebrates its
100th anniversary. In 1900, The Lung
Association led the fight against tuberculosis,
then the number one killer disease in Canada.
With effective medication and tuberculosis
screening at both schools and the workplace,
tuberculosis is now under control. Over the past
century your support has saved countless lives.
We’re proud of the work of The Lung
Association over the past 100 years. Now we
face new challenges in this new century. One in
five Canadians still has a breathing problem.
Asthma is the number one reason children are
admitted to hospital and absent from school,
and it is on the rise. Together, we can work to
fight lung diseases like asthma, lung cancer,
emphysema and new strains of tuberculosis.
When you return your Christmas Seal
envelope you help support vital medical
Rolls-Royce logo.
The woman leads the officer out the front
door and sure enough — there’s a Rolls-
Royce Silver Cloud sitting by the curb.
She hands over the ownership and
her insurance certificate. Everything is
perfectly in order. The officer agrees to accept
the car as collateral. He has a clerk drive the
car into the bank’s underground parking
garage.
As soon as she’s out of sight, the loans
officer calls the bank president and all the other
management flunkies into the vault and tells
them about the dumb blonde who just put up a
$250,000 automobile as collateral for a $5,000
loan.
Two weeks later the woman returns to the
bank, repays the $5,000 loan plus the interest.
The loans officer, trying not to smirk, says,
“Madame we’re delighted to have your
business but you have us a little perplexed. We
ahhh, ran a security check regarding your
background while you were away and
discovered that you are...well, extremely
wealthy.”
“A multi-millionaire, in fact. We’re just
wondering why you would bother to borrow
$5,000?”
Retrieving her car keys, the woman
replies with a smile “Where else in downtown
Toronto can I park my car for two weeks for
only 15 bucks and expect it to be there when I
return?”
matter how well intentioned your international
loans are, they can be easily swallowed up by
corrupt government leaders. Just look at
Indonesia and Zimbabwe, to name only two
examples.
It is nice that these world organizations have,
for example, taken note of the negative side
effects of globalization and have asked their
officials to look into the matter. However, the
books of economic history are filled with pious
statements of good intentions. I would urge the
well motivated protest groups to continue with
the pressure and above all keep away from
violence.
As an economist I would dearly love to see
such things as world trade benefit as many
people as possible and keep the injurious side
effects to a minimum. The private sector is not
disciplined enough to do this on its own; it is
up to the governments of these international
bodies to do the job properly.
Keep in mind, however, that some of the
correct moves may be politically unpopular
such as reducing trade barriers to goods from
third-world countries. How the protest groups
react to such moves will demonstrate more
than anything their true motives.
research in Ontario’s medical centres and
proven education programs. Moreover, when
you use your Christmas Seals on your holiday
mail to friends and loved ones you show your
support for those with lung disease.
The goal in Huron and Perth Counties is to
raise $71,000 through the Christmas Seal
campaign. Please continue our proud hadition
of caring and working for those with respiratory
disease by supporting The Lung Association
through the campaign.
Christmas Seals work year round to give life
and breath to millions of Canadians, and
thousands right here in Huron and Perth
Counties Tha‘’s the most precious holiday gift
of all.
Happy Holidays.
Kelly Munoz
Chair of the Advisory Board
The Lung Association, Huron-Perth
Bonnie
Gropp
The short of it
Care to follow me?
Each week, as many of our more
observant readers will notice, there is a
change, besides the date, at the top of
The Citizen. It reflects the number of that issue
in that particular year, but as a bit of a standing
joke among some of my colleagues and I, it
also represents the number of weeks left until
Christmas.
That said, you will now notice there are just
three more issues of The Citizen to be printed
in the year 2000. Only three more issues of
The Citizen will be read before Santa climbs
down your chimney. And if you don’t have
your shopping done by the time those next
three issues are recycled, you have just run out
of time.
Among our office workers we have a few
like myself, actually there is probably just
myself, who panics if the Christmas list isn’t
off the to-do list by the first of the month. Then
there are those who save it all until the end. It
gives me therefore great glee each week to
give them the countdown, to point out exactly
how swiftly those shopping days are passing.
All of my darker traits make it a necessity
that I shop early. Mildly claustrophobic, a
fanatic about organization, with a strong need
for control, I find it much less harrowing at the
beginning of December to look at a closetful
of wrapped presents, rather than running
frantically, like a reindeer with its nose light
out, in a last minute search for the perfect gifts.
While others fight the crowds, the weather and
the decreasing inventory, I’m snuggled
contentedly on my couch, under an afghan,
beside the warm glow of a Christmas tree.
However, I have noticed my practice seems
to have caught on. Where once a gift
purchased at the end of October brought a look
of stunned disbelief from the sales clerk when
informed it was for Christmas, now th :y asx
me if that is my purpose for buying it.
And this interest in being early doesn’t stop
at shopping. Traditionally, decorating our
home in its Christmas finery has occurred the
first weekend in December. It was once quite a
non-conformist custom. These days, however,
I feel like a late bloomer.
What is behind the changing trend? I’m not
so vain as to consider that I have led by
example. While I may have bragged to many
about how sensible my practice was, I
somehow doubt I’m a universal influence.
Yet, did one or two notice, perhaps? Did
they see in their stressed and frazzled days
leading to Christmas that I was laid-back,
carefree, actually almost bored? And then
giving my ideas a try the next year and finding
them sound, did they recruit other disciples,
and so on, and so on?
Because in this one I am right The
Christmas season can be stressful. It is a time
of high expectations, outside pressures and
extra burdens. A lamentable outcome given
that it is the most joyous time of year. Even
with all the worries that accompany the
holidays, too much socializing, too little time,
too. too little money, people are better during
the holidays. There’s always a Grinch to spoil
things, but generally, people smile, well,
kinder.
Doesn’t it make sense therefore, to push the
hassles ahead to the ordinary months, and
leave the festive season for your pleasure?
Though I’m once again dealing with the mob,
doing it in November seems a far less painful
headache. And as Christmas approaches I plan
to be once again ready to relax and enjoy.
Care to follow me?