HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2000-07-26, Page 5THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, JULY 26, 2000. PAGE 5.
Other Views
From the steward s perspective
You need to be really careful about
which words you allow to come out of
your mouth - or your word processor.
You might find yourself eating them one day.
A few weeks back I am in one of my
favourite watering holes nursing a liquid
libation when I notice a chap - a stranger at
another table, looking at me.
Not kindly.
I look away, being a polite Canuck, give it a
five beat, and look back.
He’s still staring at me.
In another lifetime, say, 10 years ago, I
would have^zoned into my Clint Eastwood-
High-Noon-Eyelock-Stare-Down
Whatareyoulookinat Bub mode, but life’s too
short. I consign the voyeur to Anonymous
Kookdom, take another sip and - oh, cripes.
He’s getting up and coming over to my table.
Let’s see now; who do I owe money? Did I
ding anyone’s car lately? Whose girlfriend
might I have innocently ogled?
Now he’s standing over me.
And he’s ... large.
“Yer the guy that writes in the paper
arncha?”
I nod. It’s not really a question.
“And last month you wrote about how much
you hate ocean cruises.”
I nod again. I had written that I thought most
ocean cruises were ridiculously expensive and
plastic and silly and that a honeymoon on an
ocean liner must be, to paraphrase Oscar
Wilde, a young bride’s second greatest
disappointment.
709 years and still counting
When it comes to the middle of July
my mind starts to concentrate on
things Swiss, more specifically the
celebration of that country’s national holiday
on Aug. 1. Sometimes I celebrate it in
Switzerland, sometimes here but it doesn’t
really matter where, it is a day that I enjoy.
This thought is helped along by the fact that
the Canon family has a visitor from
Switzerland, Stefan Sondeegger, who has just
completed his law studies at the University of
Zurich and is taking advantage of our
hospitality to relax a bit. He brings me up to
date on what has happened in Switzerland
since I was last there and I do the same about
Canada since his last visit.
Back in 1991 the Swiss celebrated 700 years
of nationhood; this year the number will be
709. That is surely some sort of record for
continuity but the country as it was then is only
a small portion of what it is at the beginning of
2000.
There were originally only three cantons,
Uri, Schwyz and Unterwalden and, if you look
at the map of the country, you will find that
they are located right in the centre where the
St. Gotthard pass crosses the Alps. Today there
are no less than 26 of these cantons.
There are still no cities in the original three
cantons, only towns, with the nearest city
being Luzern, located nearby on the beautiful
Lake of the Four Cantons or
Vierwaldstaettersee, to give it its German
name, (which must be unpronounceable to all
but German speakers).
I consider Luzern to be one of the most
Swiss of cities, lacking the businesslike
atmosphere of Zurich or the cosmopolitan
nature of Geneva but showing, nevertheless,
many of the characteristics that has made the
country famous.
One of the most fascinating aspects of Swiss
life is the holding of the Landsgemeinde, an
early example of direct democracy, held only
in a very few German-speaking cantons.
Living as I did in St. Gallen, I was able to get
“Yeah” growls the stranger at my table.
“Well, I want you to know that I was a cabin
steward for four summers on cruise ships out
of Miami.”
Oh oh. Reflexively, I draw on my martial arts
training, surreptitiously tensing my muscles,
ready to swiftly morph into an effectively
devastating defense posture.
Groveling, wringing my hands, begging for
mercy - whatever it takes.
“And I just want you to know,” continues the
stranger (Lord, his hands are big!) “that it’s
‘way worse than you wrote.”
The gist of his beef was that I didn’t talk
about ocean cruises from the point of view of
the poor saps who have to work on them. The
pay, he told me, is crummy. The hours are
insane, the accommodations Dickensian and
the passengers....
Oh, my. The passengers.
The stranger, whose name turned out to be
Corey, had a theory about ocean cruise
passengers. He figures each and every one of
them has a mandatory lobotomy before they
come aboard. How else to explain the stupid
questions?
Such as the woman sitting poolside one
Raymond
Canon
The
International
Scene
to see the one in nearby Appenzell.
One of the most fascinating aspects are the
official “counters” which are empowered to
count the show of hands and officially declare
whether the “yeas” or “nays” have won. That
takes a lot of trust but I have never heard of any
scandals in this important duty.
Swiss immigration to Canada has long made
up part of the Canadian ethnic mosaic. In
southwestern Ontario it has been represented,
for the most part, by farmers who have taken to
the more level farm land of our countryside
and have put their diligence and knowledge to
good use.
There have, in fact, been so many of them
that their activities have been entailed in a
book written by a former French-Swiss
diplomat to Canada entitled “Canada et les
Suisses 1604-1974.” In it there is a chapter on
one of the southwest Ontario families named
Freyvogel; I had the pleasure of translating this
chapter for the media.
If you are driving along Hwy. 7, you will see,
just west of New Hamburg, the old Freyvogel
Inn commemorating this family which arrived
Final Thought
Education ... has produced a vast
population able to read but unable to
distinguish what is worth reading.
- George Macaulay Trevelyan
afternoon who asked the cruise director
whether the ship’s pool was filled with fresh
water or seawater.
“Seawater, ma’am,” said the director.
“Ah,” replied the woman. “That explains
why it’s so rough today.”
Or the passenger who changed his
mind about his accommodation once he was
aboard. The ship’s purser asked him “Would
you prefer an Inside Cabin or an Outside
Cabin, sir?”
The man squinted his eyes and looked up at
the sky. “Better make it an Inside Cabin.
Looks like it could rain.”
Or the newlywed couple who had just come
aboard, and after viewing their cabin, came
storming up to their cabin steward. The bride
was crying. The groom was seriously cheesed
off.
“You incompetent boobs!” yelled the groom.
“We paid for a cabin with a view! And we look
out the porthole and what do we see? A
parking lot!”
And then there was the passenger - a dentist
from Wyoming — who plied Corey with all
kinds of inane technical questions, ending with
“Well, tell me son, does the ship run off
generators?”
Corey looked at the man and deadpanned
“Actually, no. We have this very long power
cord running to the mainland.”
Corey took a sip of the beer I’d bought
him.
“That happened on my last trip” he recalled.
He was smiling at the memory.
in the area in 1826. Check the hours when it is
open; it is worth a visit.
Perhaps the most famous Swiss company
operating in Canada is Nestle, which makes a
variety of projects in addition to chocolate. It
has bought into a number of Canadian firms
and I would imagine that few Canadians
indeed realize that its head offices are
“nestled” on the banks of Lake Geneva.
But then few Swiss are aware that the
engines of all their excellent aircraft
production have their origin in Canada.
But for any Swiss in the area who might be
reading this, the current most important date
on the calendar is Sunday, July 30 when the
national holiday will be celebrated, as usual, at
the Menzi farm between Brussels and
Monkton, northwest of Stratford. John and
Heidi Menzi are famous for their hospitality on
this occasion and you will find something for
everybody.
Proceedings start at 10:30 a.m. with a tasty
soup and I hope to see you there.
Letter
Continued from page 4
the ability to identify, apprehend and punish
criminals for their intrusion into our
community.
The most positive part of the experience is
that our benefactor, who wishes to remain
anonymous, took it upon himself to actively
help recover our property simply because he
could.
I am sure that if all criminal activity could
receive the same amount of attention it would
drive many of these scumbags back down their
holes. If just for this one instance I would like
to thank this newspaper and neighbours for
contributing to this particular recovery and
urge everyone to use that as evidence of the
val e and effectiveness of participating in our
own community policing.
Chris Lee
Bonnie
Gropp
The short of it
Cranky folk
your day is done
I am tired of people making me feel bad. I
am tired of being allowed no tjuman frailty,
while having to accept those of others. I am
tired of making allowances for the cranky and
irritable, who forgive no one anything.
To those who find it necessary to improve
their day at my expense, I would finally after
many years of abuse like to have my say.
Mistakes in this business are not done, as there
are those compelled to believe, to distress any
one person. To the rational a typographical
error is simply that, an error. They happen. It is
not a diabolical plot to embarrass someone by
misspelling their name or adding an extra
decade to their age.
Then there are the occasions when it has
nothing to do with a mistake, but rather an
individual’s interpretation of what should and
shouldn’t be. They are all too ready to know
what path someone must follow without ever
stepping into their shoes.
Working on a newspaper puts our
shortcomings on public display for all to see.
What they don’t see is what we often put up
with over the telephone and in the office
because of these shortcomings. Correct our
errors, fine. But don’t attack us as people.
As anyone dealing with the public is aware
there are all kinds of people in this world,
many of them I’m starting to believe,
unpleasant. They come with a good (jeal of
baggage. Emotional stresses, unhappiness,
insecurities in their own lives can make them
shrewish, paranoid. I have tried for a long time
to rationalize their bad behaviour in this way,
to try to understand what prompted such a
vehement diatribe over what usually in the
long-term is insignificant.
I suspect at this point any of them reading
this will scream, “Insignificant to you
perhaps!” and in a way they are right. It’s all
relative. However, there have been many times
when I have had to look at my pain and with
much force remind myself that the sun will
come up tomorrow. In the ace of some of life’s
tragedies, most things that upset us are, if
we’re honest, indeed insignificant.
All of this said, I don’t think for one moment
that a person upset by something shouldn’t
address the issue. However, I am a firm
believer in dialogue and with an understanding
that no harm was intended, an ability to accept
an explanation generously and graciously. Not
in making someone feel incompetent or
foolish.
To those who would feel it necessary to rant,
to belittle, I hope it improves your day. I know
that any time I have slipped and done the same
the effect has been quite the opposite. I feel
terrible and usually apologize. Until by some
bit of magic I become incapable of human
weakness, of possessing bad judgement or of
making a mistake, I have no right to treat
another person in this manner. It is another
example of my human condition that from time
to time I fail in this, and bitter irony that when
I do I feel worse than when I am on the
receiving end.
So here, I must apologize too. After several
years of bending in the hot air, I’ve snapped. At
first I was reluctant, knowing some readers
may recognize themselves. Then I thought
what can they do, yell at me?
Probably. But when all is said and done, I
will go home to a family who continues to love
me despite my failings. And I am determined
that the cranky folk are done ruining my day.